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AL or MC
My 89 year old mother has been living in IL for about 5 years since my father died. She plays bridge a few times a week, but otherwise her activities are eating meals in the dining room with her friends and watching tv. Over the last few months she’s stopped taking out her garbage, washing her dishes, or doing laundry. Her…
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Sad and caring formy mom 4 years
I'm new here. I've been caring for my 85 year old mom who was diagnosed with dementia/alzheimers in 2021. She just started asking about her mom, my grandmother every night, who I also cared for when I was a teenager right out of high school when my mom was working back in the early 1980's. My grandmother passed away in…
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Questions about end of life
Hey everybody. This is my first post. I’m curious to get an idea if my mom’s sudden crying, lack of communication ability, not being able to walk, is truly a sign of the beginning of End of Life. She still eats well, has no ailments(besides the obvious), and the memory care unit is saying she’s sleeping well. Any advice or…
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Mom With EOAD Lacks Motivation
Hi, I’m grateful to have come across this resource. Last year, my mother (60 years old at the time) was diagnosed with EOAD. While the diagnosis came as a shock for someone of her age, we were noticing a decline in her cognitive functions, particular with regards to time (not knowing what day it is, showing up to to…
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Put Mom in MC - Feeling Guilty
Yesterday I pur my 89 year old Mother in MC. I am feeling so guilty, like I failed her. I got her there under the guise of meeting a friend, then I just left her. I had ask the staff while preparing her room about leaving phones and tablets for her, they said leave it. Last evening my mom start posting things on Facebook…
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How big are your fiblets?
I realize this depends greatly on how much a PWD's reasoner is broken, but I think a fiblet is characterized in two ways: How big the topic is. i.e. saying that a dead person is alive (but moved far away) is big. The car (was sold off) is broken & awaiting parts is a medium sized topic (can be big in the mind of a PWD who…
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Repetition is "expressing concern, ask for help or coping"
An Alz.org page states "People with dementia who ask questions repeatedly may be trying to express a specific concern, ask for help, or cope with frustration, anxiety or insecurity" Does that apply to your PWD? I'm not sure what "help" one is asking for, unless it is a question about something specific, like a CD account…
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AL to MC - need help!
I’ll try to make this brief. I need help deciding on a MC. Mom is 72 with AZ Lives in a corporate AL for the past 3 months Now needs MC MC unit at AL is full Have to make a choice between having her at the more expensive MC unit in mine and my sister’s town OR having her 25 minutes away for 30k less a year. My sister and I…
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Making prompting or cueing work
Prompting or cueing is defined as "Prompting refers to giving a verbal, physical, or gesture cue to indicate what the person with dementia is expected to do next". https://www.brookdale.com/en/brookdale-life/blogs/2021/use-the-prompting-technique-with-loved-ones-with-dementia.html I try to use that with a PWD when…
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New behaviors from mom
Hi all I am new here. I live 5 hours away from my mom. She recently threw away her wedding rings including her beautiful 50 year wedding anniversary diamond rings my dad gave her. He passed away 12 years ago. She said since he won't come home and doesn't care about her she doesn't care either....the entire family is…
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How to Parent a Parent: When They Need Help But Think They Are Fine
Hi, all, My mother has always been a huge extravert. But as her Alzheimer's progresses, she's starting to become more socially isolated and doesn't like meeting new people. She's also kind of "moody" at times and sometimes doesn't even want to talk with her friends. We're no longer comfortable with her being home by…
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Recently Diagnosed MCI - Questions Posed
Invite your thoughts on my take on MCI diagnosis: having been diagnosed with MCI and experiencing what seems to be a downward progression, having researched pretty thoroughly it seems to me that the best thing(s) I can do are: (a) exercise daily; (b) stay engaged with others - i.e. don't isolate; (c) pursue natural…
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Seroquel
I’m new to the community. My dad has dementia these past 5 years on namenda and donezepil. Lately he has started so sundown and will start having these episodes of looking for his wallet and blaming my mom (main caregiver) she’s stealing his money. Our doctor said to try seroquel but I’m scared as when I’m reading about…
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Argumentative
Hi new here my mom has had dementia for 2 years she thinks she can do whatever she want .she cancels dr appointments when she knows they Important and she argues with me she not going she does have other health issues I don't know how to help her understand how to get her to go without a argument
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Need advice
My 94 year old father just passed away and my soon-to-be 94 year old mother has been with me for the past 3 weeks. She has dementia. My dad and I had shared caring for her. Now it’s just me, with no family nearby. I’ve had very little sleep while my father was hospitalized and then here in hospice. I’m hoping I’ll have…
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Mother-in-law with Alzheimer's diagnosis refusing treatment/diagnosis
Hi all, I am new to this forum. My mother-in-law was diagnosed with early stages of Alzheimer's about nine months ago. Since then, it has been an uphill (upmountain?) battle. She has refused to accept the diagnosis and will not return to see her neurologist despite MRI and cognitive confirmation of the disease. She has…
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Memory Care--The Fishbowl
Memory Care is a closed and controlled environment, welcome to The Fishbowl
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Not Diagnosed yet
I have been left with the responsibility of caring solely for my grandmother who is showing very progressed signs of dementia. My issue is, how do I get her a diagnosis and help, if she refuses to go to the doctor and her son (who is states away) has POA over her and refuses to acknowledge there is a medical need? I am so…
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Alzheimer's/Alcohol Dementia, Alcoholism, Hoarding and Medication Refusal - what to do?
Hello, My mom has been a lifelong alcoholic who has refused most medical care in her life. She lost her home, was asked to leave her independent living situation due to hoarding, and she is in assisted living now for the last week but seems to have declined. She is physically weak, uses a walker, and is essentially blind…
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Mom is constantly angry with my sister
My Mom was diagnosed with Alzheimers in the fall of 2022. She is understandably having a very hard time with the loss of her financial independence and is constantly accusing my sister of controlling her. We have POA and I tell her we're making the decisions together, but her anger is focused on my sister, who is the…
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Sun upper versus Sun downer
My mom wakes up yelling at me about her bank account and that I need to stop stealing from her. She does this nearly every morning, sometimes before her feet hit the ground. It takes her a hot minute to calm down but doesn’t really let go of it until later in the day. She no longer seems to grasp the fact that her online…
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I'm so tired.
My great grandma recently moved in with me. I knew there would be an adjustment period, but months later the behavior is only getting worse. She doesn't ever sleep a full night and is just never happy. She is 94 and acts like the biggest diva. Almost like the entire would should be ready to serve her and nothing is ever…
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I believe my mother may have Alzheimer’s.
My dad is 82 and in good health. My mom is 77 and my dad and I believe she has Alzheimer’s. She will not leave the house and refuses to see a doctor. She sleeps throughout the day and gets up around 7-8pm. She argues with my dad and blames him for everything she’s feeling. This goes on almost every night until 4-5 am. She…
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Moving MWD To Indiana
Hi! My mom who lives in FL was diagnosed with ALZ in June 2023. It has progressed quickly that by December was confusing me with her deceased sister, missing medications, taking the next morning of meds after every nap, forgetting where my brother & I live etc. She lives alone in FL but has a boyfriend who comes over daily…
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Mom is hitting; is it reasonable to expect an action plan?
I'm new here, struggling to find some info so any help is appreciated! - also, sorry for how long this is. Last fall, my sister and I convinced our dad to put Mom in memory care. She's advanced enough that she can't manage personal hygiene or communicate her needs effectively. Mom has this fun thing where she often has…
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Vascular dementia, alcohol abuse, presenting well around others and friends who tell her she's fine.
I am taking care of my 74 yr old aunt who has vascular dementia (middle stages) and suffers from alcohol abuse. I moved her 1yr ago from STL to SFO and got her an apt where my 77yr old father stays with her for company. She had been having falls regularly in STL and when I moved her she had just had 12 staples remove from…
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Another outburst...doctor suggests new drug...MC
I am just sharing because it helps me to get this off my chest. My DH had another outburst on Thursday night which was truly frightening. My one interest that takes me out of the house is rehearsal for a musical group I belong to, which happens each Thursday evening. Since myself, my DDIL and DS are all a bit afraid of…
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Venting/Help
Hello all, I just joined this group and have been reading posts to try to figure out what is happening with my dad and how to handle it. His situation does not fit neatly into any diagnostic criteria from what I can tell. Sorry, this will be long. He is 85, my mom died about 10 years ago. I live a few miles away, my…
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When you take care of family members with AD,what can cheer you up or bring back old happy memories?
Sometimes I feel frustrated when taking care of my grandpa with AD.I don't feel like he's the same him anymore, and we seem to be the most familiar strangers.I wonder what will bring you guys the old happy memory that cheer you up to continuously look after your family members. Hoping to receive some kind answers to help…
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Memory care fears
I have had my stage 6 DH on waiting lists for two small residential memory care homes. I just got word that one of them is likely to have an opening in two months or so. Immediately my fears skyrocketed about whether my husband will think I have betrayed him when I have him move. He is cognizant in the moment but doesn't…