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Getting rid of stuff
DH still in the clearing out stuff stage. But now he has gotten to the point where he throws stuff away. He threw everything in our freezer in the basement away. Which wasn't much but… Now he wants me to get rid of blankets and towels. He thinks we have to many. Lol . I'm afraid I'm going to come home and find I have…
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Memory Care to Skilled nursing journey
My DH had a fall 3 weeks ago at his MCF and they transported him to the hospital. I didn't want him to go because I knew most likely he wouldn't be able to return to the memory care unit. I know how these things work. Well, they've said he is not going to be able to come back there. So I'm looking at skilled nursing now. I…
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fists and toes clenched
My DH has been home with me for two months after being in memory care for six months. He has started clenching his fists and toes, and he is amazingly strong. He will hold on to blankets when we are trying to get him out of bed, and it takes two of us to get his hands free. Does anyone else have this problem or a solution…
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Parallel living
Not sure how else to describe this but DH constantly refers to our "Other house"? Which he says is identical to this one, but he wants to take his belongings there. I'm continually putting things in our car for the "morning" to be taken there. After he goes to bed I take them out of the car and put them away. Sometimes…
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Paranoia/Delusions While On Donezepil and Now Memantine?
Hi, all, Long story short, my mom took Donezepil and Sertraline for about a month earlier this year. Her cognitive abilities improved, and we were psyched. And then…she started having paranoia and delusions, nightmares, and something like a psychotic break happened. Her doctors didn't think that Donezepil was the cause,…
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Memory Care transition
Well it has been 2.5 weeks since my DH has been in memory care. Prior to this, he spent 3.5 weeks in the hospital. The first couple of days he was there, I literally slept like a log. My bed didn't even look like i had moved a muscle. But as the days wear on I'm finding my big old house so quiet. It's sad. The facility is…
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Help With Care for My Mom & Myself
My mother was recently diagnosed with Dementia. Currently, I have in-home help which I plan to continue as much as we can. I am wondering if anyone knows of support groups (the ones I've found in my area are already full). This is completely new to me and I want to ensure I am doing the best I can for my mother. Any help…
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Deception but not the usual topic
my mom has dementia and I've well read on the topic of the tendency to lie to fill in memory holes, or confabulation. I cannot find any material on this behavior: We will giver her a plate of food and ask her to be sure to eat it all. Total of 4+ ozs between all the items so not a large helping by any reasonable gauge.…
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Difficult and lonely
I had a friend disable DH truck. He went berserk. He is still upset after 7 days of trying to get me to have it fixed. Now he is upset over some scam. All his cards are locked. Our retirement money was moved to a brokerage firm. Thank goodness. I took him to the bank to withdraw cash, he randomly walked into a bankers…
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Challenges over Loss of Control
Good afternoon! I'm a brand-new poster and am an only child to my 79-year-old mom with VD. She's in memory care and has been in decline for years, with bigger deficits after stroke-type symptoms and multiple falls. Over the past year, she's become more paranoid and accusatory about my not visiting enough, the management of…
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She is the Love of My Life, will she come back for a moment?
My DW, first showed signs of mild cog impairment during covid, July of 2020. Sill very mild what everyone thought was stress related. Then in 2/2022 we both were infected with a severe. Case of covid with brain fog, that I have been able to recover from. Not so luck has been my DW, although I have made many efforts since…
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Behavior: Dangerous, harmless and something in between
When I see a PWD attempt something dangerous, I put a stop to it, even if it results in some agitation or disagreement. For example, despite my best efforts, a PWD can attempt to jam a fork into a live electric toaster to pull bread out. So I can't "live in their world" in this case and sometimes I can't spend every single…
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AL or MC
My 89 year old mother has been living in IL for about 5 years since my father died. She plays bridge a few times a week, but otherwise her activities are eating meals in the dining room with her friends and watching tv. Over the last few months she’s stopped taking out her garbage, washing her dishes, or doing laundry. Her…
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Sad and caring formy mom 4 years
I'm new here. I've been caring for my 85 year old mom who was diagnosed with dementia/alzheimers in 2021. She just started asking about her mom, my grandmother every night, who I also cared for when I was a teenager right out of high school when my mom was working back in the early 1980's. My grandmother passed away in…
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Questions about end of life
Hey everybody. This is my first post. I’m curious to get an idea if my mom’s sudden crying, lack of communication ability, not being able to walk, is truly a sign of the beginning of End of Life. She still eats well, has no ailments(besides the obvious), and the memory care unit is saying she’s sleeping well. Any advice or…
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Mom With EOAD Lacks Motivation
Hi, I’m grateful to have come across this resource. Last year, my mother (60 years old at the time) was diagnosed with EOAD. While the diagnosis came as a shock for someone of her age, we were noticing a decline in her cognitive functions, particular with regards to time (not knowing what day it is, showing up to to…
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How big are your fiblets?
I realize this depends greatly on how much a PWD's reasoner is broken, but I think a fiblet is characterized in two ways: How big the topic is. i.e. saying that a dead person is alive (but moved far away) is big. The car (was sold off) is broken & awaiting parts is a medium sized topic (can be big in the mind of a PWD who…
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Repetition is "expressing concern, ask for help or coping"
An Alz.org page states "People with dementia who ask questions repeatedly may be trying to express a specific concern, ask for help, or cope with frustration, anxiety or insecurity" Does that apply to your PWD? I'm not sure what "help" one is asking for, unless it is a question about something specific, like a CD account…
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AL to MC - need help!
I’ll try to make this brief. I need help deciding on a MC. Mom is 72 with AZ Lives in a corporate AL for the past 3 months Now needs MC MC unit at AL is full Have to make a choice between having her at the more expensive MC unit in mine and my sister’s town OR having her 25 minutes away for 30k less a year. My sister and I…
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Making prompting or cueing work
Prompting or cueing is defined as "Prompting refers to giving a verbal, physical, or gesture cue to indicate what the person with dementia is expected to do next". https://www.brookdale.com/en/brookdale-life/blogs/2021/use-the-prompting-technique-with-loved-ones-with-dementia.html I try to use that with a PWD when…
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New behaviors from mom
Hi all I am new here. I live 5 hours away from my mom. She recently threw away her wedding rings including her beautiful 50 year wedding anniversary diamond rings my dad gave her. He passed away 12 years ago. She said since he won't come home and doesn't care about her she doesn't care either....the entire family is…
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How to Parent a Parent: When They Need Help But Think They Are Fine
Hi, all, My mother has always been a huge extravert. But as her Alzheimer's progresses, she's starting to become more socially isolated and doesn't like meeting new people. She's also kind of "moody" at times and sometimes doesn't even want to talk with her friends. We're no longer comfortable with her being home by…
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Recently Diagnosed MCI - Questions Posed
Invite your thoughts on my take on MCI diagnosis: having been diagnosed with MCI and experiencing what seems to be a downward progression, having researched pretty thoroughly it seems to me that the best thing(s) I can do are: (a) exercise daily; (b) stay engaged with others - i.e. don't isolate; (c) pursue natural…
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Seroquel
I’m new to the community. My dad has dementia these past 5 years on namenda and donezepil. Lately he has started so sundown and will start having these episodes of looking for his wallet and blaming my mom (main caregiver) she’s stealing his money. Our doctor said to try seroquel but I’m scared as when I’m reading about…
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Argumentative
Hi new here my mom has had dementia for 2 years she thinks she can do whatever she want .she cancels dr appointments when she knows they Important and she argues with me she not going she does have other health issues I don't know how to help her understand how to get her to go without a argument
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Need advice
My 94 year old father just passed away and my soon-to-be 94 year old mother has been with me for the past 3 weeks. She has dementia. My dad and I had shared caring for her. Now it’s just me, with no family nearby. I’ve had very little sleep while my father was hospitalized and then here in hospice. I’m hoping I’ll have…
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Mother-in-law with Alzheimer's diagnosis refusing treatment/diagnosis
Hi all, I am new to this forum. My mother-in-law was diagnosed with early stages of Alzheimer's about nine months ago. Since then, it has been an uphill (upmountain?) battle. She has refused to accept the diagnosis and will not return to see her neurologist despite MRI and cognitive confirmation of the disease. She has…
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Memory Care--The Fishbowl
Memory Care is a closed and controlled environment, welcome to The Fishbowl
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Not Diagnosed yet
I have been left with the responsibility of caring solely for my grandmother who is showing very progressed signs of dementia. My issue is, how do I get her a diagnosis and help, if she refuses to go to the doctor and her son (who is states away) has POA over her and refuses to acknowledge there is a medical need? I am so…