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PWD over-estimating their abilities - any strategies for coping?
My 94 yo mother was diagnosed with dementia last July. She is in stage 4. She lives in a CCRC. She's been there 6 years in a cottage living independently. Now we have a succession of aides coming in for various tasks, like medication management and general supervision. She complained about that a lot at first, but seems to…
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Doctors appointments help!
I just took my mom yesterday to a new primary care. I just moved her closer to me and so we are starting from ground zero. She was undiagnosed before she left her last doctor but had taken a cognitive test and shows signs of dementia. Anyway, at this doctors appointment she told the doctor absolutely nothing. Told her she…
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Caregiving mixed with trauma from parents’ marriage
My parents have been unhappily married for four decades. Essentially, they hate each other, which I view as a foundational trauma of my life—that they remain married I mean. My mother has what seems to be stage 6 dementia and right now, by necessity, my father is the primary caretaker. He’s worked hard at being patient and…
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So many questions! Ups and downs, rapid decline, toileting issues, when to move....
Hi all, My 82 yo mother was diagnosed with Alzheimers just a few months ago. We moved her into assisted living a year and a half ago with "mild cognitive impairment." In the last month, we have seen a significant decline. She was prescribed Aricept about 6 weeks ago by her neurologist and the rapid decline started shortly…
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Drastic Change in Posture
Hi all! My mom is 70 and I am her 27 yo daughter/caregiver. Over the summer we placed her in a memory care unit due to her FTD getting worse. Last month, within a week her posture drastically changed. She is hunched over and she is unable to move her head up (her chin is touching her chest). She was just evaluated by a…
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More Men Are Taking Care of Aging Parents. They Feel Unprepared.
Good WSJ article here: https://www.wsj.com/health/wellness/men-caregivers-aging-parents-sons-ba7a6d71?st=2mo7qktf0ucw7yt&reflink=desktopwebshare_permalink
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Mom Was Served
Good evening/morning/afternoon everyone! Yesterday was kind of a shock and I'm looking for some guidance. My mother got served court papers for a dental procedure she had never paid for. Long story short about 5 years ago she was told prior to the procedure that it would be covered by insurance, however once the procedure…
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Driving - got Mom’s doctor to have “the talk” - I feel so guilty
This is my first post. I apologize it’s so long. My 94 y.o. mother was diagnosed with dementia in July (mixed ALZ/vascular). I’d say she’s gone from stage 3 to stage 4 in just a few months. My brothers and I have been trying to get her stop driving. We encouraged her to take advantage of the on-call driver in her CCRC…
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Setting Boundaries on Home Maintenance
Mom was diagnosed with dementia several months ago, and is in the moderate stages. Her siblings, her doctor and I have all talked with her about AL, but she is digging her heels in and refusing to move. She lives in a big house by herself that requires significant maintenance. Several weeks ago, her TV broke and she was in…
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My 83 years old Mother thinks the Male Neighbor is stalking her & she now thinks he is in my room
My Mother was diagnosed with Dementia in June 2023, she is a retired teacher (55 years) & hold 3 master's Degrees, she was extremely attractive, but she was always unkind, selfish, and focused on men. My father was not good to her, they divorced when I was a baby (he was also a very Dark Black man, and for light-skinned…
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Using telephone
Hello, I am new to this forum and this is my first post. My mom who has dementia is living with my dad in assisted living. Prior to moving, she drove herself to a local salon weekly for hair styling. Since moving and at the direction of her doctor, she has stopped driving. There is a hair salon at her assisted living…
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I'm going slowly crazy
Hi all, I'm new here and the only other real support I have is another online group. My mom is 89 and has never been officially diagnosed, but she definitely has Alzheimers. From the reading that I've done on the subject I'd guess she's a stage 6. My sister handles all of her finances and takes her to the doctor when she…
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Refusing care
My mom lives with me, I’m 62 and she’s 84, I think she has dementia but I can’t get her to leave the house. She refuses to see a doctor stating there’s nothing wrong, says she’s dying and there’s nothing to be done. She’s been refusing solid food for many months only drinking ensure for sustenance and smoking. She really…
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Parent in AL - Do you wish you have more information?
Hi All, First time posting. Glad to find this resource. We moved our father into a nearby AL from a different AL many hours away back in May. I'm very close to the new facility, and have a sibling who lives out of state. The move was smooth, father is settling in nicely, and from that standpoint, we're VERY lucky! Curious…
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need advice/help
My mom and I do not know what to do about my dad. He has been acting irrational and loses his temper a lot. I have heard him tell my mom he wants a divorce and that she is no longer his wife and I am no longer his daughter. He has repeatedly say to my mom that he wants a divorce then a few hours later he claims he never…
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Managing Paranoia from LO
Hi all, I'm new here and just needing support. My step-dad started experiencing some memory loss a few years ago. Things like forgetting details of conversations or that the conversations even took place, forgetting the words for things, or needing to hear things repeated. He had pretty good self-awareness about it too. We…
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My mom hates her RCF and wants her cat back.
:'( about five months ago. We had to move my mom from an AFH to and RCF. She hates it. There are six other residents with varying degrees of disabilities and some with dementia. My mom has vascular dementia, and Alzheimer’s. She was diagnosed at 69 years old and will be 71 this year. since moving to the RCF, I have noticed…
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Dementia, Broken Hip, and next steps
Hello, First time posting. My mother is 95 and was lving independently with caregiver assistance until she broke her hip a few weeks ago. She has been through a lot since 2018 - kidney timor ablation; treatment for APL (acute promyelocytic leukemia), a small stroke, and now this. She is in rehab connected to the retirement…
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Intro since "Caring for a parent" is new
I introduced myself in the caregiver's group a while back, but now that there is a group specifically for those caring for their parents I thought I'd re-introduce myself to this group. Sorry if this is super long! My younger sister and I are the caregivers for our mother. Our father passed away in 2018 from a rare disease…
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Elderly Mother having episodes
Hi everyone I am here with a sad and heavy heart. My 74 yr old mother who lives quite a distance from me is having episodes with what I believe is Dementia. My younger sister is with her and she has health issues of her own. in the past three months my mom has been getting worse. This morning I spoke with her and she told…
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Online Fraud and Scams
Our father just had his second attempted scam. I was lucky enough to be walking past his room when I heard the discussion he was having over the phone. He allowed someone access to his computer to "run a virus" check. We ended the call and have contacted his credit card company, banks, and financial planner. We don't want…
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recent fall, dementia diagnosis, close quarters
Hi everyone! I think this is going to be a spilling-my-guts sort of post and hoping to get some insight. Some brief context: we have suspected my dad (83) has had some cognitive decline for years, but he stopped going to the doctor in 2019 and has refused since (to the point of blow-up arguments when we pushed). He lives…
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how to proceed with parent's care, disagreements within the family
Hello all, I'm new here and am in need of advice/support from others who understand what it’s like to care for a parent. My mother (60y/o) has been dealing with memory loss since 2019, she was diagnosed with mild cognitive decline at the time and has advanced significantly since. We are working with doctors to get an…
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Mama
On June 29, 2023 my mama passed away at 8:22 pm. I had been her full-time caregiver for almost 7 years. During that time I was also a college student. I saw my mama everyday during her illness. I didn’t want her to go on the journey alone. She was on in-home hospice for almost 2 years. The hospice my mama was with I feel…
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It’s lonely on the other side
My mom died a few months ago. It was so shocking. Even knowing ALZ is a leading cause of death, I didn’t really get that it would kill her, especially because she was otherwise in good health and still had abilities I assumed she would lose first (walking, talking, recognizing loved ones). But she fell and never walked…
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My mama passed
On June 29, 2023 my mama passed away at 8:22 pm. I had been her full-time caregiver for almost 7 years. During that time I was also a college student. I saw my mama everyday during her illness. I didn’t want her to go on the journey alone. She was on in-home hospice for almost 2 years. The hospice my mama was with I feel…
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Advice for a young caregiver?
Hello world, this is my first post on ALZconnected as I have just recently joined. I have never joined a support group before and I do not know anybody else with a parent with Alzheimer's so here I am giving this a try. For some context, I am 20 years-old and my father who was diagnosed with Alzheimer's is 79 years-old and…
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Looking for advice on my situation with my mother who has dementia
Hi everyone. I am very new here, but I am desperate for any advice that can be given regarding my mother with middle stage dementia and my father who is in denial.this is a very long story. My mom has suffered a number of illnesses dating back to her teenage years. She has had myasthenia gravis, then lymphoma, and now…