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Separating Parents in AL - How to handle the physical move itself?
Suggestions for Thursday's move? We have to: Tell our mother (stage 6a/6b with anosognosia) we have decided that she and Daddy need separate rooms in order to receive the care they each need Respond to her confusion, frustration, fear, and anger (her symptoms manifest with great anger) Support our dad (who already knows…
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Grieving and Planning
Hello All- My first post ever. I am 40 years old and moved in to help my father 78 who was diagnosed with alz in 2020-- but had been declining for over a decade. He has really progressed and is incontinent, very weak, and disoriented. He recently had a fall in the shower and we had to call 911 for a lift assist-- it was…
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Literally the Last Thing I Needed
Hi everybody, hope you’re all doing well. Bit of backstory to this predicament; my mom (60 diagnosed with ALZ) was a single parent to me (25) and my younger sibling (20). My sibling and I have separate fathers, mine passed when I was 7 and theirs is alive but not active in our lives. He was an abusive man to us and my…
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Tone Deaf Invitation
A couple with whom DH and I have been close friends for 40 plus years just invited ME to a small dinner party celebrating the wife's 80th birthday. The invitation spelled out that I should get one of my children to watch my DH and just come by myself. I am miffed and maybe even insulted by this request. Has this happened…
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How To Balance Life
Hi everyone! Hope you and your LO’s are well. I have been having a lot of problems having a proper “work-life balance” for lack of a better term. My mom’s (60) diagnosis and required care takes up all of my energy, thankfully she’s still able to move around and shower herself and use the bathroom on her own, and those were…
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Trying to Help my Mother with Memory Loss
Hello all, This is my first post. I am an only child and my parents live a 7 hour car drive away. Last year, I noticed that my mother was experiencing memory loss, but my father is in denial. Last May, I went up to visit and got her to see a neurologist. Her memory loss has gotten worse. She can't remember how many days…
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Suspected Alzheimer’s/dementia
My mom is 57. She is forgetting the answers to questions five minutes after they’re answered and forgetting what store we bought something at when we were there the day before. She didn’t remember making a decision about travel plans until I reminded her of the decision and told her why. She feels like it’s nothing. I’m…
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I believe my mother may have Alzheimer’s.
My dad is 82 and in good health. My mom is 77 and my dad and I believe she has Alzheimer’s. She will not leave the house and refuses to see a doctor. She sleeps throughout the day and gets up around 7-8pm. She argues with my dad and blames him for everything she’s feeling. This goes on almost every night until 4-5 am. She…
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Coping with a father with dementia in my 20s
At the behest of my therapist, I am looking for the support of others going through similar circumstances as I am. I feel incredibly alone in my slow grieving process for my father, who is 68, and has been dealing with EO dementia for the last two years. I feel completely out of my depth as a 28 year old person without the…
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Whether to quit my job.
I am right now on fmla to be taking care of my dad. My question is the I’m 60 and the cost of paying someone will cost more that my salary per week. Don’t know whether to quit after fmla is over and just take care of dad myself. I have moved in with him last July.
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DH is still very capable, but I am focusing on the diagnosis which frustrates him
My DH and I have been to a few doctor appointments and have been told he has some form of dementia. We're waiting on a couple more tests (hearing & sleep) before a follow-up appointment with the geriatric dementia specialist. DH says he just wants to live life and enjoy it as best he can. He admits he has memory issues -…
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Mom had dementia, now dad has it.
Hi, my mom passed on about 6 years ago after dealing with early onset Alzheimer's. Now my dad has been diagnosed with it, and I just came here for some support because, although he's not in the advanced stages yet, I'm starting to see changes in his memory. It reminds me of what my mom went through and how I felt when she…
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Young caregiver
Hi, I am a 25 year old young caregiver. For almost 4 years now, I have been the sole caregiver of my 58-year-old mother suffering from early Alzheimer's, since my father passed away in 2020 due to the pandemic. I am Italian, but given my mother's condition we moved to China, her homeland, to take better care of her. I…
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Father on a fixed income
My dad is located in CA and is living on a small fixed income (less than $2,000 a month). He has zero savings and I am not in a position to help fiscally or in a position to have him live with me. Trying to find any additional help has been impossible. Does anyone know of organizations that help. He is currently in a…
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POA and Uncle who is mad and is threatening to change it
Hi everyone. My sister and I are new to taking care of our Uncle who has dementia. My Aunt (his wife of 70 years) died last year. We have started seeing that he is declining. He says he has a million dollars in a bank that consumers can't even have accounts, he just went out and bought a brand NEW truck for 65k in cash and…
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How do I best help Mom, the caregiver?
Hello~ first post. My parents both turned 80 and Dad was officially diagnosed with stage 5 Alzheimer’s dementia the same week. His progression through early stages was very slow~ we’ve noticed little things for seven or so years~ but he had COVID in January, and the big slide began… I live 90 minutes away from them with my…
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Who offers Medigap for elderly people with dementia?
Hi All, my Mother is 81 years old and has dementia- I am needing to sign her up for supplemental health insurance because the MC facility I am trying to get her into requires it in addition to her Medicare. All the companies I have called so far to ask if they offer Medigap for someone with dementia have said no. I need…
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Never Dealt With Alzheimer's Before and Need Some Guidance
Hello. I have never been close to someone who had Alzheimer's before (I'm 54) and I need some guidance, please. My father (Jamie) passed away in 1988 at age 50 from brain cancer. His best friend, Charlie, has been close to me ever since. He gave me away at our wedding. He's now 87 and has been in good health his entire…
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About to take over paying daily bills - any advice?
My FIL has Alzheimer's and in the past six months has become increasing unreliable in paying bills. Thankfully, my wife has financial power of attorney - its not the help it claims to be but its something. Anyway, we need to step in but want to find a way to maintain trust. My wife spoke to him about putting bills on…
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Venting/Help
Hello all, I just joined this group and have been reading posts to try to figure out what is happening with my dad and how to handle it. His situation does not fit neatly into any diagnostic criteria from what I can tell. Sorry, this will be long. He is 85, my mom died about 10 years ago. I live a few miles away, my…
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When you take care of family members with AD,what can cheer you up or bring back old happy memories?
Sometimes I feel frustrated when taking care of my grandpa with AD.I don't feel like he's the same him anymore, and we seem to be the most familiar strangers.I wonder what will bring you guys the old happy memory that cheer you up to continuously look after your family members. Hoping to receive some kind answers to help…
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Memory care fears
I have had my stage 6 DH on waiting lists for two small residential memory care homes. I just got word that one of them is likely to have an opening in two months or so. Immediately my fears skyrocketed about whether my husband will think I have betrayed him when I have him move. He is cognizant in the moment but doesn't…
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New fast progressing signs of Dementia
Hi new here and in search of helpful feedback. My 85 year old dad has not been officially diagnosed with dementia yet but his pcp and er doctors all agree that he is showing all signs of being that. His behavior has changed so rapidly. He started with spying on all of us, my mom, my boyfriend and myself. We thought it was…
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Overwhelmed and not sure what to do
Hello - I am sole caregiver for my husband with dementia / Alzheimer's. Things are changing fast for him lately. He will wander around the house and look at things like he's never seen them before. He will move things around, not remember about it, then get upset about who or why it was moved. He sometimes seems like he's…
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Changing Assisted Living Communities - VENT
Hi everyone. I'm new here and I am in the process of exploring the different discussions posted. I appreciate all of the information everyone has shared. It helps me to feel like we are in this together. I wanted to get some things off my chest and I didn't know where else to go. I am an only daughter and I care for my…
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Need to Move Mom from AL to MC
I moved Mom into AL in January after MUCH convincing and lies that it would only be for a few weeks. She went downhill when she arrived, had behavioral issues and was placed on an involuntary psych hold due to comments and behaviors she was exhibiting. Her medications were adjusted and she is now settling in, but due to…
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Children of parent's who have died from Alzheimer's
I have been the caregiver for my mother for the last 16 years. This August she died from the disease. I have not been able to find a single book or group about this and find it very frustrating. I thought since I grieved the loss of my mother for the 16 years that her death would be easier. Stupid I know....this is hard as…
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Trying to Capture my Grandma's Memories for Her and the Family
My grandmother has mild dementia that's getting worse and she's slowly losing her memories. I'm trying to use my engineering background to create a sort of Scrapbook/Memorybook for my grandmother and for my family to enjoy. My goal is to design something that can help my grandma capture her memories by uploading photos to…
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Trying to Capture my Grandma's Memories for Her and the Family
My grandmother has mild dementia that's getting worse and she's slowly losing her memories. I'm trying to use my engineering background to create a sort of Scrapbook/Memorybook for my grandmother and for my family to enjoy. My goal is to design something that can help my grandma capture her memories by uploading photos to…