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Communication
I NEVER wanted to be my mother's "parent". From listening to her complaints, calming her fears, managing her bills, to bathing her (and more of course). My brother said that he simply couldn't- too much work, not emotionally capable etc... Now, when we're in the throes of it all, he is paranoid that I'm taking all of her…
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Support & Advice
Hi. My name is Kate & I am new to the forum. My mom has been living in a memory care facility for a little over two years now just a few months after my dad died abruptly. The last two years have not been the easiest with losing a parent & losing a parent to dementia. My siblings and I relationship has been estranged since…
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Dad's decline - does he realize what's happening
My sister and I take care of our 102 year old dad. He's been on hospice since Sept but I think he's been doing fairly well all things considered. The last 2-3 weeks it's like he's dropped off the edge of a cliff. He hasn't had any solid food in almost 2 weeks. The only thing we've managed to get in him is a few spoonfuls…
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Caring for a 75 year old parent with Alzheimer’s
My wife and I take care of my MIL (her mother) who doesn’t live with us and is home with her husband who has Parkinson’s and a in home caregiver. They don’t drive anymore or go out other than doctor appointments. Needs ideas to stimulate her mind as i feel it’s rotting away doing nothing all day she is constantly repeating…
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Deep denial
What do you do when someone has dementia but part of their dementia is that they are in deep denial that there is anything wrong with them at all? My father in law is 89 and routinely forgets things, can't carry on a conversation, makes horrible financial decisions, tries to drive and gets in accidents--it's a slow motion…
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Ending Medication
My mom was taking 5mg of donepezil- a very small dose. 10mg gave her terrible hallucinations and 5 mg just gave her various stages of bad dreams. (That's why she was in 5mg) She absolutely hates taking medicine and I hated her taking it unnecessarily. The doctor, actually 2 doctors, suggested that 5 mg probably wasn't…
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Talking to Family
As of yesterday my mom has been placed in the memory care unit. Which is a big relief to me, she isn’t taking it super greatly which was expected of course, but she is in a safe space. And so, now the flood of comments from relatives come in. “Oh, but everyone in there is elderly” “Oh maybe we can take her out”. Etc. I…
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Anxiety and the future
Hello I am new here and have gotten a lot of comfort from reading some of these messages. My dad is in a regular skilled care facility, and I believe he has dementia due to some of his behaviors. One of his most recent is his extreme debilitating anxiety. He will call me 20 times a day, begging me to help him. But he…
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How to get mom to her first doctors/neurologist appt.
Hi there. My mother is 72 and has not been formally diagnosed with dementia. She has been in severe cognitive decline since 2020 and presents at stage 5 dementia. My father has been in significant denial of her condition since 2020. Even though I have had REPEATED conversations with him about getting her the care she needs…
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Dementia or old age?
My dad has diagnosed vascular dementia. And it is apparent. However, my mom, who is his caretaker, is exhibiting symptoms of dementia too. My mom thinks so too. But she saw a neurologist and did some tests and was diagnosed with just MCI. Which is a sign of dementia. But maybe it's just old age? She is relatively high…
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Having a separate life from LO
Hi everyone - I am so thankful to say there has been no major drama the past few weeks. Now focused on finances (struggling to rent my moms property, need to find new property manager, but that’s all just life). The biggest struggle now is how to have A life. My mom was always demanding and needy, partly why I kept a safe…
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New member, Mom has dementia, this is overwhelming
Hi, I'm new here. My mom was diagnosed with Dementia in October. We had to move her into a memory care facility. I've finally stopped crying every day, but this is so overwhelming. My mom was a computer engineer and had a brilliant mind, and now she can't even string together a coherent sentence. It's so hard to see this…
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My mom is very against the idea of Memory Care/AL and I'm scared she will be scarred from the move
My mother is 75 with Dementia. It's in somewhat of an early phase-- sometimes she's totally normal but she thinks my dad (who recently passed away) is living in our neighbor's house and "needs a sweater bc he is cold" and she obsesses over it most days. She just got on a low dose of Seroquel. I have her on the waiting list…
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Gestione del malato di demenza durante la sera
Buonasera a tutti é la prima volta che scrivo. Assisto mia suocera malata di demenza degenerativa , purtroppo verso tardo pomeriggio parte la fase delirio. Non riesce più ad orizzontarsi e mi dice che le sposto le cose , tra cui il letto che non riconosce come suo. Oltre ai farmaci che prende prescritti dal centro UVA , mi…
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How do you remain calm when your mom asks the same question over and over?
My mom constantly asks the same question over and over. I try to remain calm when answering her or as calm as I can but it’s not easy. How do you remain calm?
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Time for nursing home
Hello All. Just joined today. I’m sure this topic has been discussed but any input would be greatly appreciated. My sister and I have been caring for my mom for the past five years. We’re in the same town, and she takes turns going to each of our places. I have a one bedroom apartment where mom sleeps in a porch area of…
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Father has AD and I am looking for support
Hello all. Noob here, but I have been taking care of my dad for 5 days per week for the past 10 weeks and am getting some burnout(I am running two households in winter and it's suddenly become nearly overwhelming) I was doing quite well until this past weekend when everything hit me. He's at home as yet, and doesn't need a…
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Administering my moms meds by a non-medical caregiver
My mom has been dealing with Alzheimer’s/Dementia for the last 6 years. She is now end stage and has 24/7 care. I have her medication made up in little pouches and the caregiver were crushing and mixing with apple sauce. I just learned that the agency does not allow the caregivers to crush or mix with food. I do t know…
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New… Dealing with Mom’s Hallucinations
My mom is in her 60s and her pcp says she is having brain slips and in stages of dementia. I am trying to get her seen by a neurologist and someone recently recommended a geriatric psychiatrist as an alternative for an assessment. It has been 3 months since the diagnosis and she was given an antidepressant. She is now…
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Mom is in Memory care
Hello. I’m new here. My mom has Alzheimer’s and she’s been living in Memory care for almost a year. She’s 78. Before I placed her in the facility she was living with my family and I but it became too much. I am currently struggling with guilt when I go to leave after visiting her and anxiety and sadness seeing her getting…
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PT question.
Has anyone taken their pwd to physical therapy before? My mom has a frozen shoulder she can move it but doesn’t have full range of motion. It was recommended to go to pt by her doctor after telling her doctor she was having some pain. We went the first time to get evaluated and was given home exercises to do. We went back…
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What happens after I become POA?
When I have full POA, how does the banks and other financial institutions and healthcare facilities know I'm POA?
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Who CAN'T be POA?
My mom wants me to be POA over finance and medical. I am on disability plus Medicare and Medicaid. Do I still qualify?
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Bible Verse to Life You up 1/15/24
OUR HOPE IS GOD’S UNFAILING LOVE Psalm 147:5 New Living Translation 5 How great is our Lord! His power is absolute! His understanding is beyond comprehension! 11 No, the Lord’s delight is in those who fear him, those who put their hope in his unfailing love. When the winds of sickness, stress, anger and fear are strong and…
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ER Visit for Mom
Over the last week, my mom has been insisting to go to the ER. She claims someone told her she is going to die if she doesn’t go, and is complaining of pain (does not indicate where) but then goes about like all is well. I’ve checked her out to see if there was anything visually abnormal in the area she says she feels…
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Glad to have found this space
I posted this earlier today but in the wrong forum, so I am reposting it here. I truly am glad and somewhat relieved to have found this space to be able to share information about dealing with a parent who is a PWD. My 82 year old mom is a PWD and dealing with the situation has been a crazy roller coaster over the last 18…
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Paranoia, delusion, hallucination and aggression
My mom with early onset Alzheimer is turning 69 next week. In the last two months, things take a drastic turn as she started with less engage with us turning into full delusion and hallucination all awake hours. There is no redirect or reassuring technique to help as she is not engaging with us. She turns physical and…
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mom may be 2 hours away
My sister found an assisted living for mom close to her, but it's about 2 hours for me. I don't like that she may be so far. I've lived near mom since I've been married & had kids. And now my kids are grown. It's kind of breaking my heart thinking mom may be far from me. Am I overreacting?
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How to engage dad
My dad has no interest to do anything except eat and sleep. He used to be tech savvy but now he don't know how to use the computer, laptop, cellphone, iPad or the remote. He can't follow the news even though he always want to watch CNN. He used to love driving but of course he can't do that anymore. He loved fishing but he…
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Mom is on her way to a memory unit!
Hi all! What an intense day!! After hearing from Mom’s pcp yesterday that she had my mom’s admission papers ready to pick up today (Friday), and all I had to do was take Mom to the memory care facility— I thought everything was going to go smooth. Not! Called the memory care facility once we arrived to see how to proceed…