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How do I best help Mom, the caregiver?
Hello~ first post. My parents both turned 80 and Dad was officially diagnosed with stage 5 Alzheimer’s dementia the same week. His progression through early stages was very slow~ we’ve noticed little things for seven or so years~ but he had COVID in January, and the big slide began… I live 90 minutes away from them with my…
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Catheter
My dad, 88, with VD, has an indwelling catheter due to inability to void due to enlarged prostate. He refuses to take meds for enlarged prostate. Lately he's been asking the urologist to discontinue the catheter. He didn't want to wear it for the rest of his life. I understand it is very uncomfortable and painful. He asked…
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Mom is hitting; is it reasonable to expect an action plan?
I'm new here, struggling to find some info so any help is appreciated! - also, sorry for how long this is. Last fall, my sister and I convinced our dad to put Mom in memory care. She's advanced enough that she can't manage personal hygiene or communicate her needs effectively. Mom has this fun thing where she often has…
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Feeding tube - Resource that's helping me discern this - (Catholic perspective)
Hello ALZ Connected, I've received much love and support over the years from ALZ Connected and ALZ specialists that I thought I would share a resource with you all. Since I'm Catholic this post is from the Catholic perspective. I think it could benefit anyone though going through deciding what's right, or not right, when…
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Activities for PWD
Anyone have ideas to help keep PWD active and engaged with something to do? I'm sure it depends on the stage. When I'm able to make a weekday, daytime visit to mom's MC, I sometimes find her sitting among the group that is doing an activity, but she is rarely participating in it. I have gotten her to do things like…
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Tough Decision
I’ve posted a lot about mom’s move to MC and how amazing her facility handled things. She’s been there since August and it’s been hard (as expected), but mostly positive. Of course she says she wants to leave sometimes but I think everyone feels that. Now, it turns out the former director - who left shortly before my mom…
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Brand New to This- Mom will NOT go to the Dr. but she's definitely developing dementia.
I'm going to have to care for my 83 yr old mom without an official diagnosis, but her mom died of Alzheimer's and now my mom is heartbreakingly losing her grasp on memory, reality and her own personality. My mom has been my rock my whole life and is such a generous loving soul. Sometimes I don't know who she is when she…
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Vascular dementia, alcohol abuse, presenting well around others and friends who tell her she's fine.
I am taking care of my 74 yr old aunt who has vascular dementia (middle stages) and suffers from alcohol abuse. I moved her 1yr ago from STL to SFO and got her an apt where my 77yr old father stays with her for company. She had been having falls regularly in STL and when I moved her she had just had 12 staples remove from…
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Mom long distance
Hello, I'm new here, my mom was diagnosed with dementia a year ago, and has been on aricept ever since. She seems almost back to normal. Almost that is. She got this diagnosis after a head injury. Could she have possibly been misdiagnosed?
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Assets
I'm trying to determine what kind of assets are considered income for my parents to qualify for Medicaid and Long term care. I've been calling around for services for my parents when the time comes.
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Losing Drivers License
My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimers in Sept and the doctor sent a letter to the DMV to suspend her drivers license. She's had an MRI, a Fit To Drive exam and an in office exam and they all indicate that the diagnosis is correct. She is adamant that she is ok to drive and refuses to give up her keys, her car or driving. My…
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Hygiene Issues
Recently my MIL has developed hygiene issues to the point she has a bad odor. She had given up using her walk-in tub and was doing a good job washing up in the sink. But within the last 2 weeks or so she hasn't been washing up and it's noticeable. Her use of antiperspirant doesn't help. She also isn't brushing her teeth or…
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All Alone...Only in her mind
The feeling of being alone with only her confused thoughts can be terrifying….. #JoyInAlzheimer's simplebender.com
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VOICES
Hello , I'm not really sure how to deal with the voices my mom hears all the time , I have been entertaining it by telling her they cant hurt her and that I wont let anyone near her ? Am I doing the right thing ? I just don't want to create confusion by telling her they all-in her head should I dismissed it ? She gets mad…
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AL question
how do I tell my mom she has to move to AL?
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stress
My father was diagnosed with Dementia this year. My mom is his primary caregiver. We have nursing help on occasion so my mom can get a break and my family and I spend alot of time with them . Besides the fact of struggling to see my dad go through this disease I find myself getting upset with my mom. Many times it seems…
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New to forum and dementia
Hello everyone Three months ago my beloved father who has Parkinsons, had a grand mall seizure. The seizure triggered a massive and frighteningly fast decline including rapid dementia. I had been caring for him at home (my husband and I live upstairs from him) for several years as he was unable to do certain ADLs and he…
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Moving In
My brother wants to move my mom from her home into AL, gradually. He wants me to take her there one day for a meal, the next day for an activity etc... My mom doesn't want to move from her home and he thought maybe by moving her slowly into the facility, it might help with her anxiety and sadness. She did visit this lovely…
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Dementia and eating
Hi all, I’m new here and don’t know where else to turn. My father still lives on his own and took a large decline after my mom passed 5 years ago. He seems safe in his home, has very staunchly ingrained habits and has his little dog. About a month ago we hired companion care in hopes it would bring some regularity to his…
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Incompetence
I have a DPOA for my mom. It is not spring form so I am able to do what needs to be done now. The question is should I ask the doctor for something that states she is incompetent? What would be the benefit of having this? Would AL need this? Could it be used in a hospital situation if she refuses treatment? Is it something…
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Laugh or cry
Edited: I was just vent typing yesterday while in the hospital with MIL. This blank message posted accidentally but now I can’t seem to delete it.
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Keeping an eye on mom
My mom takes care of my dad with dementia. So far, she's doing a good job. But she has MCI after seeing her neurologist and is being observed for possible Alzheimer's dementia. Her memory and confusion is getting worse. She has appointed me and my nephew as DPOA and is effective when she becomes incompetent. Right now,…
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Dad is 61 with EO - just looking for support <3
Hi all - this is my first post here. My dad has what was early onset, but has progressed. I am having trouble navigating this and the pressure it is placing on my mom as well. We are all doing our best. Sometimes it's hard for me to hear about how amazing and lighthearted my friends lives are (I'm 28) which I sometimes…
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Trying to get help from somebody but moms jealous what do I do !!
So my mom goes to daycare but a patient that goes there has offered to help me with my mom at home . She has helped me before and has been no problem but this weekend my mom told the caretaker that’s helping me that she comes first and pretty much told her that she didn’t like her and that no one gonna replace her , I told…
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About to take over paying daily bills - any advice?
My FIL has Alzheimer's and in the past six months has become increasing unreliable in paying bills. Thankfully, my wife has financial power of attorney - its not the help it claims to be but its something. Anyway, we need to step in but want to find a way to maintain trust. My wife spoke to him about putting bills on…
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Tax extension
On the last day to file taxes, my dad calls me and asked if I could take him to the tax office and get the tax forms. It's my fault that I didn't remind my dad to file it on time. But I don't think he can do it himself without help. I got him an extension and I will make sure he gets it right.
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Trying to do the right things
I find taking care of my parents is a great challenge for me. I've been reading the postings from everyone and I'm more informed about dementia. My dad has vascular dementia and my mother has symptoms of Alzheimer's dementia. My mom can still take care of dad but I have to step in to help both of them when needed. I am…
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Bathroom
hello! Recently my dad who has EO has been waking up in the middle of the nights to use the bathroom and he has been unable to find the toilet. Causing him to pee on the carpet and honestly anywhere except the toilet! Any advice? I’ve thought about the alarms to wake me up when he gets out of bed but I’m looking for…
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Disappointed
Why is there always a catch? My LO is back in the sunshine and warmth (check). She found an AL community that she "likes" (check). My brother and I like it too and it's "affordable" (check). They have a cute 1 bedroom apartment that offers her a sense of autonomy (check). Saddly, all of the 1 bedrooms are currently…
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Helping my mom move more...
Hi. I am brand new to this group. I would love to chat and get ideas with my mom. I just moved in with her yesterday. She just got out of the hospital and was told someone needs to be with her most of the day. She sits in her recliner with her warm blanket and wont get up for HOURS. She says no, she is cozy, I don't want…