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Mom calling every night demanding to leave
Hi! New here. I have my mom in memory care as her Alzheimer’s is progressing. She is calling us and threatening suicide if we don’t get her out of there. We took her to the hospital and she spent some time there getting her meds adjusted. We took the cell phone away as she was calling non-stop. Do we just go along and say…
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Dealing with death of someone LO with Alz knew
My MIL is in the later stage, of middle stage ALZ. Her BIL recently passed, and her children plan to take her to visitation and funeral. MIL didn't like this BIL - he seemed to enjoy needling her about the smallest thing (I saw this myself). She basically hasn't had much contact with anyone in my late FIL's family for 15…
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Guardianship
Has anyone had experience with having to get guardianship over a parent because they were so resistant and refused help? It seems like such an ugly process. I am going to do everything I can to avoid going in that direction but I am afraid that my mom is so stubborn and she will make terrible mistakes on her own... TIA for…
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2 Parents with dementia & memory care
Hello, new to the group. I have both my parents in memory care against their will. I know it's where they need to be, but they are both in denial that they cannot go back to their home and "live their life". They are blaming me for their situation and it breaks my heart. Anyone else in a similar situation?
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Pharmacogenetic testing & alzheimer patient anxiety
Is there anyone out there that has looked into or tried Pharmacogenetic testing to determined the best medication for their loved ones’ anxiety?
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Cautiously optimistic
Appointment with neurologist at memory center next week. Mom has been diagnosed with dementia, this is to see what kind. I hope we learn something.
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FORCED to move
Well, the SL facility has finally decided my mom needs to go. They gave some lame reasons, half truths and some whole truth excuses. I'm actually relieved to be leaving the place. They just don't have the staff to support someone like her... frankly, like quite a few people who live there. My mom's problem is, she's a…
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What Stage Is He In????
My dad, 95, now does not recognize his own apartment where he has lived for over 50 years. Is this a late stage development? I still cannot figure this stuff out. M
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Unsure where to even start
It’s a long one…. My husband and I are 34 years old and have recently had my 68 year old FIL move in with us. Previously, my FIL lived with his wife, who had been recovering from a mild stroke she had in March 2023. They live about 2 hours away from us and we thought they were managing okay as my SIL lives in their area…
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mom slipping away
Mom said she only remembers bits & pieces of her life. Asks how many kids she has. I miss my dad more these days, who died 19 years ago. I wonder why. Is it because mom is slipping away, not herself anymore. Our relationship has changed & I just miss my mom & dad! Mom recently said to me 'it's nice to meet you'. When I…
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Understanding Dementia
Does anyone have a book they could recommend which would teach me more about Dementia? I don't need a book for caretakers as I am not in that position. But I would like to know more specifics about the condition, if that is possible. Someone mentioned in a post, Frontal Lobe Dementia. I know my FIL executive function is…
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What does 'with it' mean?
Dear Alz friends, This is totally a way for me to process the phrase 'with it'. My FIL is in memory care, 10 months now. 95. Has had falls and brain bleeds leading to his placement in MC. My FIL family has always revered him as invincible. He was and in many ways, without mom, (4 years) still the patriarch. What I find so…
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POA papers finally signed.
For those who knew about my difficulties on having my mom sign the POA papers, well, finally she did it! I am so relieved.
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Caregiving isn't easy
It's hard being a caregiver. It just is. It takes a toll on you and your family. It's something we just have to deal with because we know it won't last forever. http://simplebender.com/2024/02/03/joy-in-alzheimers-episode-18-impact-on-caregiver/
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The paths to Memory Care are twisted
Sometimes just when you think you understand and bracing for the move of your parent to MC, it doesn't happen.....and you have to regroup. But we aren't far away from the ticket to be punched.....
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Nanny Cam vs. Security Cam
Hi all, so the topic of installing cameras has come up many times as a means to keep an eye on my folks and the certified aides. Dad vocalized not wanting them on grounds of his privacy being invaded which I understand. However, it’s just getting more & more concerning with aides being lazy, falling asleep, and mom growing…
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Hospice Diagnosis
Hello All Hospice has been helping my dad in AL for a few months now. They gave him the diagnosis of senile degeneration of the brain. Anyone hear of that or can you explain what that is? I know it is what it is, but just curious is this a form of dementia? I find so much help here, thank you to everyone!
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Dad has passed
Dad passed away last week. Even though he was 102 and he had been on hospice for 4 months, I really didn’t think he was going to die so soon. Hospice never once said it was coming until the day before he passed – I think they knew my sister and I were doing everything we could to keep him going when they just kept saying…
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Adult Day Care vs. MC
Hi everyone, In your experience, is adult day care more like respite care if the LO with dementia lives with their primary caretaker? My mom lives alone, and I'm trying to figure out if adult day care can help her continue to live alone at home through stage 4 so I can delay putting her in MC until stage 5, or if it…
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Need ideas on how to get Dad through moving day...
Have really enjoyed the questions and commentary on this site so far! Like many similar situations I've read about here, Mom's ready to move, Dad doesn't want to, and doesn't understand why Mom wants to - we've tried many explanations, but it's clear Dad doesn't quite understand - he seems to think his "things" (he likes…
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Preparing for parent pet loss
Hi everyone, 93 YO Mom with cerebral small vessel disease/suspected dementia and living independently--for now--has an elderly dog with Cushings that is in decline. Specificially, atrophying legs, stumbling, voracious appetite/thirst, growing incontinence, constipation, knuckling paws and stepping in own feces outside then…
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Confused heartbroken and alone
It's heartbroken to watch my mum and best friend disappear in front of my eyes. I feel angry that I don't know what to do to let her know that I love her with all my heart ♥️ I'm not very good at expressing my feelings I'm scared I would take her place in a heartbeat Is this normal feelings?
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Valentine’s Day Lunch
I guess lunch went as well as expected. We went later so that there would be fewer people. A local highly regarded Italian restaurant. No waiting (praise God) but MIL did not like the table we were shown and wanted to move to a window table. I went to ask the hostess (who said no). When I told MIL, she said she’d already…
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Dementia and Hospice
Hi! I'm new here. Does anyone else here have a parent with late stage dementia and is on hospice? My mom fell Oct 9 and had a 18 day hospital stay starting Nov. 27. From there, she was unable to return to her MC place because she was not ambulatory. Now is she is in an adult foster care home, on hospice and bedbound. She…
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when your mom's house is 2 hrs away and she needs full time help...
I brought my parents to live with me 7 months ago when she broke her hip. She now uses a walker full time and her short term memory is shot (alzheimers). BUT she still remembers she has a home and asks for a ride back every day. She cries about it daily. I feel awful. I bring her back once a month to check on things and…
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My Mean Mom Doesn’t Want to be here
My 83 yo mom has had signs of dementia going on 10 years. She was officially diagnosed last year. Why so long? My brother couldn’t fit into his schedule to get her examined during the last 5 years she lived with him. Prior to that we weren’t really sure it was dementia, she was still reasonably normal just lost things…
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Newbie Here: I need direction and help. This is new to me
I have read all the posts on this forum to date, and I appreciate the input. But my situation has some new elements, and I haven't seen all of them mentioned in one post: First, my mother is 82 years old, lives by herself on an isolated farm in Arkansas, where she has lived for 60 years. Her nearest neighbor is about a…
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Helping Mom with finances…
How do I get my mom to trust me to help her with her finances? She is in middle stage, but insists there’s nothing wrong with her. She goes to the bank and harasses the poor manager there 2 to 3 times a week. She wants to take thousands of dollars out of her account all the time. Technically, she can, but it’s not safe or…
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How to deal with some siblings about moving Mom to a memory care facility
My Mom has 24/7 home health care for 4 years. She is having more episodes each week and her mobilty is getting worse that she almost needs 2 people to transfer her. My siblings and I are thinking of moving her to a facility. However, 2 siblings out of 5 will reject the idea no matter what and not really thinking about the…
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Wrong care facility??
My LO has always been overly sensitive and that seems to be getting worse as the disease progresses. She can't hear so the caregivers speak loudly. (She tells me that they yell at her all of the time) She's not always cognitively aware so the caregivers speak loudly to try to guide her. (She tells me that they yell at her…