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Checking the weather repeatedly
Our father frequently turns on the Weather Channel throughout the day and night. He runs to the door, looks outside, and returns to his room to turn on YouTube and watch animal videos. Six/Seven times a day now. We imagine this is possibly to ensure the Weather Channel isn't lying to him. This cycle repeats several times a…
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My DH is gone
My DH left us this morning. His passing was relatively peaceful, but there was a six-day buildup to it, so I feel wiped out. As he was leaving the nursing home to go to the funeral home, all the staff lined up to see him out. It brought on fresh tears. My DH was a wonderful husband and father, and we will miss him…
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Alzheimers drug horror story from the NYT
https://www.nytimes.com/2024/10/23/health/alzheimers-drug-brain-bleeding.html?ogrp=ctr&unlocked_article_code=1.UU4._7lR.3WFk8efLcVB9&smid=url-share I hope this link works but this is a gift article which I can reprint its all here in a number of sections It is the worst ethical violation I have seen in my entire career…
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I’m Not OK But It’s All Gonna Be Alright…
song by Jelly Roll for those struggling and especially those in Stage 8 💜
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My Step Dad had a stroke.
2024 is ending the way it began for me and our family. My Cancer diagnosis, placing my DH in memory care, my DH passing away in August and now in November my 90 year old Step-Dad had a stroke. He has no children so I’m trying to help as much as I can. Please continue to pray for our family. Love you all. 🙏 💜
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Finding things to do
Hi! I am searching for things for my dad to be able to do to allow me to get my homework done! i am currently in a doctoral program and a primary caretaker for my dad. He goes with either a family member or our caregiver while i am at school but once i get home i put him infront of the TV and he just watches the same thing…
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Having a baby in six weeks, dad is declining
I moved my dad into memory care a little over a year ago. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done but he adjusted amazingly well. I moved him a few states away to be near me and I see him a few times a week. The MC he is in is really nice, the staff are amazing and I feel really lucky. But I don’t have any other local…
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Question about genetic risk and prevention
Hi, all. Sorry that we're all here because of this horrific disease. I have quite a bit of dementia and alzheimer's in my family, I'm trying to understand my genetic risk and any preventative measures I can take. In my family both of my maternal uncles, one of my mom's first cousins, my mom's grandmother, and my mom's aunt…
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What's my identity tonight?
I love my BF like no other. (45yo eoa) But I freaking HATE this disease. Normally I'm beautiful and he lo lo lo lo loves me (gotta love speech aphasia). But a few weeks ago when I was trying to get him settled for bed. I picked my battle as he was trying to remove the sheet and comforter from the bed i got up and came to…
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Saddened by signs of progression and feelings of inadequacy
We had a nice Christmas but it was evident that DH's disease is progressing. He can usually do a good job of hiding his confusion when the kids/grandkids are present, but that wasn't the case yesterday. And he's really tired today from the effort that it took. Although he's still in the early stages of the disease and I…
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Helping parents
My mom most likely has Alzheimer's. She is 81. My dad is 83 and caring for her but not doing well ..alot of anger about her losing things. He is frustrated and says things he probably doesn't mean. He's upset because she's not cooking, and she constantly hides things. She then calls me (I'm 59 and out of state) crying…
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Calling to shut off utilities
Our father has developed a belief that the utility bills are "stealing" his money, leading him to make phone calls to PG&E and Earthlink, demanding his money and requesting them to close his accounts. Fortunately, we have successfully established contact with the companies to prevent any potential disruptions in service so…
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Season's Greetings
Hi friends. I just wanted to stop by to let you know I still think of you all the time. I hope you can find at least a little enjoyment through the holidays, and I wish everyone a better new year. It might seem like an odd thing to say, but I miss you guys and gals, and I know I'm better off not being here every day. Two…
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Got Hysterical
Not sure why this happened. My DW was at the Activity Center this morning when the doorbell suddenly rang . A couple , who were friends of ours for years , showed up today ( Christmas Eve) with a beautiful tray of Christmas sweets. We had not seen or heard from them in maybe 3 years. As they were leaving we shook hands…
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This is fine....
Whenever our fathers leaves the room for a bathroom visit or a walk we check his room and photo everything.
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Tipping staff
hey quick question - do you holiday tip staff at your AL/MC facility? If so, who (and how much it you’re comfortable sharing)…
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Sleeping and Restlessness
I’m helping with the care of my mother with dementia. My father is the main caregiver but I step in often to give him a chance to rest and reset. Mom has recently started getting up multiple times throughout the night and refuses to go back to bed. As you can imagine both my parents are exhausted the next day and mom is…
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Holiday wishes and a little sad
Wishing everyone in this amazing group a calm holiday. Im glad to report mom continues to do well in her MC. She is calm, engaged, and has friends. Her mmse score (9) sucks, but she still seems to know a lot of things: she knows family, she knows she likes her new place way more than the last one, she knows I visit, she…
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Well, That Didn’t Go Well
Oh, ya’ll. I had such success in getting someone in to clean the house as the cover to getting someone eyes on my DW while I work. That’s just one day and I’ve found I’ve run myself ragged trying to balance working from home, going to the office for a few hours, racing home, etc. Totally unsustainable. So, I tried today to…
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Memory Care in New Jersey
Hi all, my uncle (who raised me and is practically my father) was recently diagnosed with dementia. I live in NYC and he lives in Virginia, I’m hoping to move him to a memory care facility in New Jersey in a few months. Are there any memory care facilities in NJ that people can recommend? Thanks so much!
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What stage and how long will it last?
I know every one is different but just wondering what stage and how long will this last. MY DH has gone from being angry and obsessed about driving to wanting sex all the time. He will not leave me alone and is always asking me if we are husband and wife. When he doesnt get his way he sulks and make comments under his…
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Hoarding
Is hoarding typical of ALZ? When my mother started hoarding I thought it was because she realized what she had lost and didn't want to lose more, even though things have little to do with cognition or mobility. My DH was a child in Budapest on WWII and suffered real malnutrition and deprivation. Now he not only hoards…
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Personality changes
so my husband was diagnosed with early onset within the last year. I (and the kids) have noticed some personality changes, only word I can think of is silly acting. Before we told my son (adult) he said on more than one occasion “why is dad acting weird”? Is this “normal”? Thanks and Merry Xmas
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Finding something for her to do
Lori is 69 years old 5ft tall 110lbs a very healthy women other than the Alzheimer's. She was diagnosed six years ago, now she has no memory, she can't read or write or watch any programming on TV or listen to books. She has a hard time with simple directions and her brain does not recognize or identify simple objects like…
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Wife won't let others know
My wife tells me not to tell anyone that she has Alzheimer's. Her mother had it for decades and told everyone. They were very sympathetic. How do I deal with this?
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Merry Christmas
Wishing all of you a Merry and Blessed Christmas Day. I know things may not seem very merry right now but I hope that each of us can find something to be grateful for today and know that you are blessed and loved. For me, I am grateful that my DH is being well taken care of in MC today even though I can't be with him due…
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Update on my mom
Hi All, I found a home in Kissimmee Florida that we can buy. Multiple homes are affordable there. Much better than Miami Beach, in many ways, but most poignantly: more affordable. Right now, we live in neighboring apartments. It works well because she and I are very close, but we have our own spaces. Also, my apartment has…
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It's been years since I've gone anywhere.
I haven't left the property in four years. I work night shifts doing chores such as feeding the farm animals. Always waiting for the cover of darkness, and have avoided daytime interactions with everyone for two and a half years. These sacrifices are what we make for our ungrateful dementia family members we care for.
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Shared Roons
My preferred memory care only has shared rooms. This memory care chain says that this is intentional and that research indicates that roommates are good for the brain health of someone with dementia. They say they match people up in a thoughtful way. Does anyone have experience with shared rooms? Do roommates really help…
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Almost 4 weeks and Christmas
Is there anyone else here just trying to make it through Christmas? I will be so glad when Saturday gets here and the second of two celebrations is done. It’s almost 4 weeks since Mom passed. Every day I made a list of what to do and I might get 1/3rd of it done. November was spent watching Mom pass so I was way behind on…