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Frustrated with the system at KP
DH was diagnosed with MCI 3 years ago after an MRI showed evidence of an old parietal stroke. He has 2 more strokes in the last 2 years and he was finally seen at the memory clinic in May. Cognitive impairment, possible early VD was the outcome. Reassess him in 6 mo. Called to get Nov appt and was told 2 staff quit and he…
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Nightmares
Hey there! I’m new here, my dad is 78yrs old and has cognitive decline. He’s starting to have more life like nightmares and wakes up really scared not knowing where he is. Has anyone else experienced this?
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Trying to Do What is Best
We are about to hit the wall with rehab discharge and getting my mom into AL instead of letting her return to her IL apartment. This is going to be very hard since her perception of her abilities and safety issues does not align with reality and she is itching to get back to her bridge games and friends. She has a left arm…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 10/20/24
WORKING FOR PEACE Psalm 4:8 NLT "In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, O Lord, will keep me safe." Matthew 5:9 NLT Jesus' Words "God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God." THINK ABOUT THIS Do you lose peace often? If so... What tends to make you lose peace? Have you…
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Blocking porn on laptops/cell phones
Hello All, First post here - I just signed up today. I am a part-time caregiver for my father with dementia and he has no problem watching porn when I am in the room, multiple times a day. I can hear it! My mom can't because she has hearing issues. But she sees it as well. And the psychological damage is indescribable. I…
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I think my dad is making bad decisions
my mother is now in assisted living, she has dementia. This is her second month.I asked my dad to stay away for a few days to let her adjust. She was verbally and physically abusive before being put in medication. She has a phone and calls him 10-12 times a day. He signs her out to go shopping and also takes her home for a…
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Short-Tempered Caregiver
I've been reading through these posts and I see a lot talking about the PWD getting angry, but I didn't see anyone talking about situations in which the caregiver is short-tempered and yelling at the PWD. My mother's primary caregiver is her husband who is not physically abusive to her, but is very short-tempered (always…
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Journey continues
Hello all. I cant believe it has been 2 years since my first post on this forum. The journey continues. Mom has been in what I feel is a good memory care facility. The staff genuinely appear to truly care about all the residents and do the best they can. Most visits she will talk very little and no context when she does.…
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Seeking Support and Advice in a Challenging Situation
Hi everyone, I wanted to reach out to this community to share my experiences and hopefully gain some insights from those who may have faced similar challenges. I currently live with my parents, pooling our resources as we navigate financial difficulties. My father, who is in his 80s, is likely dealing with dementia or…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 10/20/24
WORKING FOR PEACE Psalm 4:8 NLT "In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, O Lord, will keep me safe." Matthew 5:9 NLT Jesus' Words "God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God." THINK ABOUT THIS Do you lose peace often? If so... What tends to make you lose peace? Have you…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 10/20/24
WORKING FOR PEACE Psalm 4:8 NLT "In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, O Lord, will keep me safe." Matthew 5:9 NLT Jesus' Words "God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God." THINK ABOUT THIS Do you lose peace often? If so... What tends to make you lose peace? Have you…
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Bible Verse to Lift You up 10/20/24
WORKING FOR PEACE Psalm 4:8 NLT "In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, O Lord, will keep me safe." Matthew 5:9 NLT Jesus' Words "God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God." THINK ABOUT THIS Do you lose peace often? If so... What tends to make you lose peace? Have you…
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DH doesn’t think we are married
my DH with vascular dementia and Alzheimer’s doesn’t recognize our home as his, doesn’t think we are married and has moved into a different bedroom. He tells me he’s not comfortable here and needs to move. Is it time for MC?
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Legal and Financial Transition
MY DH is in early stages of dementia, but I can see it accelerating. We need to shift responsibilities to me and also to our adult son. Though we own our assets and make decisions jointly, and it was he who insisted we revisit (together) our wills recently (thank goodness) DH has held the legal/financial reins for over 40…
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Mother making serious allegations
We took my 78 year-old mother of a family trip with us. The trip went well and she seemed to have a really nice time. My mother lives with my sister where she is able to take a van to a day program during the week in the city and come to our house in the suburbs with us on the weekends. Yesterday evening she told us that…
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Phantom smells
I’m 63 and have had phantom smells for almost 2 years. My primary care doc dismissed them 1+ years ago as Covid-related. Since then I’ve begun having memory problems, definitely a personality change (much crying/depression), and difficulty problem-solving. My mom had EO and my dad some form of dementia. I had a PET scan…
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Sundowner
My wife has advanced dementia. 2 months ago she fell down from the top stair and suffered a TBI. She is in pretty bad shape. Physically she's not bad. Mentally equal to a 4-5 year old. She is 63. The hardest part of the day is 3:00. When sundown starts she gets desperate thinking she's done something wrong. Nobody loves…
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Open Discussions with your LO in early Cognitive Impairment
My LO and I were married 25 years ago. She was, and still is, a vibrant, beautiful, and active woman with almost childlike enthusiasm to learn new things. LO is a passionate Christian, a strong conservative, and a woman who never leaves the house without being meticulously made up and dressed. She was never comfortable…
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Seroquel too strong?
The doc recently prescribed it. My DW is small framed, which is perhaps a factor. But the first day she took it at breakfast - wham! - she fell asleep 2 hours later, woke up for 2 hours, then out (hard) again. I called the physician, said cut the pill in half tomorrow. I will try it but am still worried this will be too…
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My dear husband has left me
My dear husband died Friday morning, with me by his side, in his bed at memory care. The seven weeks leading up to this were probably the worst of both of our lives. I took him to the hospital on August 14 after two weeks of trying to deal with his spiraling agitation at home. Five days into that hospital stay, he stopped…
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MIL moved in without warning, without a plan
Hi - I'm new here - and I'm feeling so everwhelmed. So my MIL has lived alone for the past 20 years- the past 5 she has been declining- we unplugged her stove- put a lock on the door so she couldn't go downstairs - etc. My husband is a procrastinator - we finally went to a lawyer last week (as for years his mother told him…
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Health Insurance Considerations
My mother has Stage 6 ALZ and is in MC in hospice care. My brother holds her DPOA, and we three siblings all hold the healthcare POA, able to act individually. We consult often about her care and make major decisions jointly with no disagreements. My mother's current Medicare Advantage Plan is being discontinued, and my…
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And another question - this one about being able to judge the heat of water
My DH takes showers with help from me. Yesterday I realized he didn't have any towels, and I left him in the shower to go get some. When I came back (in probably 2 minutes) the bathroom was completely steamed up, and I stuck my hand in the water and it was so hot!!!! He used to take tepid showers because he hated hot…
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Right?
I just want someone to tell me I’m right (yes I’m venting about family and MC staff). My guiding principle is “if it doesn’t bother her, don’t fix it”. MIL recently lost her upper dentures but she doesn’t realize it and doesn’t miss them. No action needed. What do I hear from MC staff? I should get her fitted for a new…
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Is sleeping a lot at night normal for pwd?
My parent with dementia goes to bed so early many nights like 730 or 8 pm. I often am right outside of her room at night so I can tell she is sleeping soundly at least for the first few hours. I thought that people with dementia had sleep issues. She usually sleeps like 11 hours. Is this normal? Does this high level of…
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hair trigger verbal aggression
I only see my parents a few times a year due to living 12 hrs apart. We are always excited to see my dad but not my mother as much. During the visit we try to do as much as we can for her to make the visit "smooth" however the moment she starts to get overwhelmed she snaps at her grandchildren. The grandchildren are…
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Parent with Early Onset Alzheimer's
Hi, I'm looking for a support group specifically for adult children of parents with early onset alzheimers. My mother is in her mid-60s and was diagnosed a couple years ago. As she is beginning to decline more and more I want to connect with others in a similar set of circumstances. Most people I speak with are dealing…
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eating habits regressing
DH has ES Alz…but lately, he seems to be regressing in HOW he eats…licking the knife after putting on peanut butter on toast, licking his fingers at the table instead of using his napkin…basic good manners. Is this just him or is this a thing?
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Is a diagnosis of any benefit?
Just left the third neurologist we've seen in the past year. Background: Last year Oct 2023 my husband was having problem with executive functions. He walked our neighborhood several times a day, went shopping with me, but easily surrendered his drivers license, and all control of our finances to me. This Oct 2024, he…
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Just venting
I know most of you have been through this, just need to let some of it out. How do you deal with all the negative and getting angry at the least thing. Maybe angry is the wrong word. Dh can't stand the dogs to bark or the least little wait or what he precedes as not the way it should be. I'm always wrong or it's my fault.…