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Mom incompetent
I have DPOA of mom. So far I'm doing everything for her and act on her behalf. However I'm scared that she might be angry towards me if I do something against her will. She might want to revoke the DPOA. The only was to secure the DPOA is to confirm Mom is incompetent and can't make rational decisions. I just had Mom visit…
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What to say.
Yesterday my DW said if she would die tomorrow I would be happy because I would be free of her and her problems. I know this is the disease talking, but it is hard to understand. Does she think I don't love ? How do y'all handle this ? Thanks.
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Advice please
My mu. Has just been moved to retiment living, as we thought it would be better for her having people around to sit with through the day. The problem we have she is awake most of the night and going out of her flat and knocking on everyone's doors until some one answers. She gets upset and feels lost. She is not using the…
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Personal Hygeine
My father & his wife are in assisted living & have recently resisted showering. I will be approaching the subject with them, but could use any advice you have on how best to approach. I do not live close enough to be onsite to assist on a regular basis.
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Legal Repercussions
Hello, I am new to this site. My mom was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. She was previously diagnosed with Mild Cognitive Impairment. For 5 years I have been paying her bills for her because she asked for help and could no longer do it herself. She still has access to all of her funds and we have only had a couple…
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Elder law appointment
I finally have an appointment with elder law 5/20. The initial consultation is free for 1.5 hrs. I am taking my mom there and discuss her will, setting up a trust fund, Medicaid planning and estate planning. Mom is very concerned about the lawyer fees. I am afraid she will not proceed with the lawyer after the…
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Just need Support - My Dad fell and is in the hospital
Hi- I just need some support at this moment. My dad with dementia fell and smacked his head on the pavement. He now has a traumatic brain injury with bleeding occuring in his brain. I just spoke with him tonight and he sounded so slow when speaking to me that I am worried its now a permanent condition due to the TBI. Just…
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Meeting her in her reality doesn't always work.
Most of the time when my mother says things that aren't true, I can just go along with it and meet her where she is, but how do you handle it when she doesn't recognize my father, and wants to know who the man in her bed is? Or asks where her husband is when he's right there with her. Any advice would be appreciated!
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First Post
I’ve been following along for months now and decided it’s time to jump in. My DH is 68 and was diagnosed with EOAD and logopenic progressive aphasia. His latest neurology visit in December had him in stage 5, but I think he’s probably been dipping into stage 6 for a few months now. We’ve been married 40 years and needless…
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Subacute rehab vent
My DH Is in a subacute rehab after having his toes and part of his foot amputated due to gangrene. He is not supposed to put weight on his foot until the doctor gives the ok. Last Friday night while sundowning, he got out of bed, walked into the next room and fell. He cut his arm and has a big bruise, but nothing else. The…
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Struggling in Stage 8
my DH Lonny passed last August. I miss him so much it hurts. While I expected the mental pain I didn’t expect the physical reaction every time I think of him. I’ve been doing things to honor his memory. I moved in with my daughter and son-in-law but I feel alone. I don’t have any friends nearby and family is so busy. My…
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Importance of connection for caregivers
Just thought I would share a recent experience. My DH bounces back and forth between stage 4 and 5-mostly five. We recently took a car trip to visit family and he handled the car ride very well which surprised me. While we were there he had a really bad night where he was extremely confused(more than normal), extreme temp…
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Don’t know what to do
My mom is 87 and quite stubborn and very mean, uncooperative and vindictive. She has enjoy of her wits about her to know when she’s doing as well as saying things to irritate me. She can say some very mean and hurtful things. This has always been her way like u hit me I’m going to hit you as hard as I can. She has always…
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Impossible Mom
Hello. I've been dealing with my mom for a few years now and am becoming desensitized and hopeless. I'll try and stick to the main details otherwise this will be a book. Background on mom: she'll be 87 in August. She had Lupus for years in the 70s and 80s but went into remission somewhere around the end of the 80's. Back…
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CBD to help manage symptoms
Any one have experience with CBD to help manage anxiety and agitation in your loved ones?
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Talking to who knows
My DW spends a good part of her day talking to people who I have no idea who they are. This is all in her mind as we are the only ones present. Is this a normal act of Alzheimer’s? Is it considered delusional or hallucinations? Should I be concerned about it and call the neurologist? Is there medications that help? I’m at…
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Home care, will this work or not ?
Through this journey I have realized several things . 1 . Don't set your expectations high . 2 . Throw out everything that made sense to you at one time . 3 . Seek as much help as you can . 4 . Last but not least stop feeling guilty when you didn't succeed in getting your loved one to do any of the things that come with…
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Moving Advice
Hello, My mom was diagnosed with major neuro cognitive disorder in November. She has a follow up with a neurologist for further testing in August. She has no idea that there’s anything wrong with her which is making helping her just impossible for my sister and brother and myself. She is refusing to let one of us be at her…
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DW does not want to see a sister
My DW is 62 and has been living with AZ for the last 7 years. In the last 4 weeks she has become extremely agitated by the mere mention of her sisters name. We don’t understand why and the sister was obviously very upset although I think she understands my wife cannot help it. I was hoping that it was an aberration but the…
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Dealing with possible anosognosia and FTD
We have been living with my MIL for about 6 months. She was diagnosed with FTD approximately 5 years ago. I could not say definitively what stage she is at as my SIL managed most of her care previously as she lived closest but was not able to move her into her home. The decision to have her move in with us was prompted by…
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The Cavalry Is Not Coming: 9 Year Edition
This is an updated version of The Cavalry Is Not Coming. I repost this occasionally as I have been informed that this article has helped many caregivers. This edition is mostly the same, although I have brought it up to date and revised it to make it more helpful. October 1, 2024 marked nine years since my wife’s dementia…
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Assistance with dressing
I have been laying out clothes for my husband each day for some time. Now he’s having trouble putting clothes on. Does anyone have any suggestions for how to help an adult put on a tshirt or sweater?
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Lewy bodies(1)
My husband was diagnosed 5 years ago with Alzheimer’s. Now we have been told he has Lewy Bodies with Parkinson. He is taking Depakote and Seroquel. Has anyone had this to happen and medication?
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A Cautionary Tale: Details Emerging About Hackman's Death
I'll put a trigger warning here. This is difficult reading. It has been determined that Gene Hackman died from cardiovascular disease and Alzheimer's a full week after his wife succumbed to Hantavirus. She was among the oft quoted 1/3 of caregivers who died before their LO. Friends describe his wife as fit, healthy and 3…
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I'm Burning out
DH is actually very sweet (most of the time). We have a companion/caregiver two afternoons a week and I can get out for a bit. It helps but not as much as I thought it would. I realize I'm burning out but he's not yet at the point where he needs MC. I struggle to do housekeeping, bill paying, I'm just putting everything…
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He doesn't give up
I have previously posted about difficulties dealing with my ex-boyfriend. To summarize, he was diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment 4 years ago. He is retested every year with the same result. He manages all his daily living activities with no problems. He also bowls, golfs, dances, navigates the computer and all his…
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physical exercise in memory care
My DW has been in MC for just two weeks. The MCF doesn't really have any facilities for real exercise. DW is in pretty good physical condition now. We regularly walked the dog, and she saw a personal trainer once a week. Without exercise, I imagine she can deteriorate quickly, losing muscle tone and balance, not to mention…
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PET Scan Amyloid results
DH just had amyloid pet scan. Just reaching out to see if anyone has any insight on where he might be with all of this based on the widespread findings. Findings were: "Tracer activity is noted in the brainstem and cerebellar peduncles but not in the cerebellar hemispheres. Tracer activity is noted in the frontal,…
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Falling Risk
I am at a loss as to what to do with my father. He has early dementia and bad balance problems. He is now falling and hitting his head every couple of weeks. One time he broke 3 ribs and now he has bleeding in his brain from his most recent fall. I don't think he should go into a nursing home just for fall risk, right? You…
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Feeling nauseous, sweating, shaking