-
Start of incontinence
I knew the day would come. DH is now urinary incontinent for about a week now. I’ve been lucky it held off for as long as it did. He’s always been very resistant to my helping him in the bathroom with cleaning himself, etc, and it’s worse now. I don’t know how I’m going to get him to wear pull-ups when it’s hard to even…
-
Not Recognizing Family Members
Any advice would be appreciated. We are only 1 1/2 yrs into this (I think] still no diagnosis. My DH has been suffering with memory loss, trouble finding foods and difficulty recognizing objects. It come and goes, some days better than others. Yesterday at our grandson’s high school graduation party he didn’t know ho our…
-
So Frustrating
This is one part of this terrible disease that just frustrates me so much. How can you have a great day with your LO in a great mood enjoying each other and all of a sudden they just start crying uncontrollably for no reason in my mind what may have caused the change.
-
Facing the Emotional Side of Caregiving
This website has helped me deal with some of my feelings, and to be kind to myself when doing so. I hope it helps you, too! https://www.caregiver.org/resource/emotional-side-caregiving "If you don’t deal with ALL of your emotions, they can be like a two-year-old who wants your attention: they will keep tugging at you until…
-
Mid-stage Dementia : Agitation and Aggression
My father has dementia. He lives with my mom in their home, and my mom is his primary caregiver- I am his secondary caregiver. About a year ago he started having issues with incontinence. A few months ago he was determined to be mid- stage dementia. After many months of urging my mom, she agreed to hire a part time…
-
Is it time?
DH almost set the house on fire today by putting hot coals from the wood stove into a cardboard box & leaving it out on the deck. It must have been smoldering all day. We (adult kids & I) discovered this just a few minutes ago.
-
How to deal with denial
My DH is probably in stage 5 or 6 Alzheimer's. Ever since the diagnosis was made (about 4 years ago) he has adamantly denied that there is anything wrong with him. He now freely admits that his memory is not good, but if I say or do anything that makes him aware that I am "caregiving" he says that I am treating him as if…
-
POLST Form - Physician Orders for Life-Sustaining Treatment Form - overwhelming
My LO is very, very elderly. She was recently hospitalized and had surgery. We had to make a lot of decisions fast and under pressure in the ER. But luckily it all went as well as could be hoped. She is definitely more fragile than she was before the whole thing but she is doing well. Her physician's practice is all…
-
Asking Permissions
My MIL is starting to ask me permission in her own home, can I have coffee? Can I close the curtains, can I do this etc? Is this a stage? Am I doing to much?
-
Life is getting harder...
Life is getting harder and DH isn't as far along as many of yours. I should have known better but we went to Costco together today. DH uses a scooter cart and follows me. Today was just so much harder. He had to use the restroom and barely made it through checkout but he made it. I took groceries to the car and then picked…
-
From the NYT: A Different Type of Dementia Is Changing What’s Known About Cognitive Decline
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/11/28/health/late-dementia-alzheimers.html?unlocked_article_code=1.5E8.jeiC.EuBZiHfxb5a8&smid=url-share An article about LATE, a recently recognized form of dementia.
-
Scientists catching up to the value of rosemary
I first began using rosemary essential oil with my mother in 2007 (she passed away from a heart attack in 2012). She became more alert, could recognize objects, could remember her name again, became somewhat more lucid, had a little bit of short-term memory, and was calmer. I have been advocating for the use of essential…
-
Looking for Resources in Maryland
Hi there! I am seeking guidance to assit my MOL with my FOL's dementia diagnosis. He is going to adult day care three day per week, but still car tasks at home are getting overly challenging. Here are some of the main issues we are working with: -sundowning (lots of frustration throughout the day) -insomonia -inability to…
-
Mother living with me has Dementia
Hello Everyone, I recently had my mom come live with me, her choice. She was living by herself up until last Oct. Fell Broke her hip, end up in rehab for 2 months for thearpy. When she was in there my brother sought out Gaurdianship over her. Needless to say when she found out she was mad. She wanted to go back home, but…
-
My mother won't see a doctor and she is not okay
My mom has always been incredibly independent and strong. She is 82 now and the last couple years she has steadily declined and has every last symptom of dementia or Alzheimer's. I live 4 hours away and my sister is close to her and keeps me updated ( I'm in the process of trying to move closer). Mom refuses to see a…
-
Best friend
I understand what you’re going 33-year-old I am 52 and 1/2 to 3 hours away. My mom and I all the time on the phone and for like the last two years my husband and I have decline in conversation then she fell and was in the hospital and I went up to visit her and stayed at her house and saw the disarray of the house and that…
-
Need help with confirming stages
Good Evening, I just went to my MIL's doctor who confirmed her for moderate onset Alzheimers with agitation. But when I questioned him about what stage shes at he just kind of shrugged his shoulders. How can I find out what stage she is in? Do we need to go to a neurologist to confirm this? This just started last month so…
-
Unprepared
With every decline, I feel so unprepared. I know what is coming, and yet each decline surprises me and breaks my heart. DH was accepted for hospice at home in September. I didn’t think he would qualify because he was still speaking and eating, not losing weight, able to swallow. But he was non-ambulatory. Yesterday he was…
-
Rehab to Memory Care
Hello, my mom is 77 and has advanced dementia. She has been living in memory care since this past March. She had lived alone for 20 years but was getting progressively worse, then couldn't stand up, ended up in the hospital last Jan. Then rehab for 2 months where she got better physically. The Dr's there thought she needed…
-
Worn out and stressed out
Hello all. I’m currently dealing with an 87 year old father with dementia. He has fallen at home about 15 times this year, and ended up breaking his hip in July. I moved him into assisted living as I didn’t feel he was safe to be alone at home. He was a smoker and the last time I was there I watched him not pay attention…
-
Hi! I'm new here... I'm a granddaughter taking care of a grandfather with LBD
Hi. I'm new here. I'm a granddaughter caring for a grandfather with lewy body dementia. I talked to a lady at AA WNY chapter and she suggested I try some support groups. A little back story about my journey so far... My grandfather is 94 and over the last 2 years has started having symptoms of LBD. He accuses almost…
-
My DH passed away this morning...
After 8 long days of watching and waiting, my DH passed away this morning. I am so thankful that his suffering is over, but I can't imagine life without him. I was there when he passed, and it means a lot to me to know that he wasn't alone. I will pray for him and for all of you who are navigating this terrible disease.…
-
Is There An Organization That Rates Home Care Agencies
Hello. I am starting to consider my home care options. My husband was diagnosed with early stage Alzheimers last month. Like many people, I want to be able to keep him home for as long as possible but I also know that I will be needing help sometime in the future. I was at an Alzheimer's Support Group recently and another…
-
Forward Planning
My wife is in her 8th year of diagnosis and lately has been slipping more and more. At some point, she will need more care than I can give, first in-home and then who knows? I will need to sell our house, which also involves getting rid of both valuable and kitschy possessions gathered over the last half century. How have…
-
Being "failure free" when PWD wants to do hard things
I understand the idea of failure free activities and that there are books on it. My question is: If the PWD insists on doing something that is bound to fail (let's say trying to scratch off stains off a dirty napkin or a couch cushion), all I can try is to distract with something else. But PWD wants to be left alone to do…
-
Affording help or MC
I have always thought I could never afford to pay out of pocket for in home help or even have memory care as an option. We are not wealthy but we have too much to qualify for Medicaid but not enough to pay out of pocket. It is extremely important to talk to an elder care attorney early on in the process. Many people…
-
I hate myself for getting rid of Dad's phone
I am devastated. I had to disconnect my dad's phone tonight. He just called 911 too many times. I hate this. I feel like I am cutting him off.
-
Counseling for Mom
Hello all, I am trying to find Counseling for my mom who is now caring for my dad who has Alz. They are both in assisted living because she would not send him without her. She is depressed and would like to see a Counselor. I am having a hard time finding a Counselor that specializes in Aging/Caregiver support that I may…
-
Out of state “friends” hardly there and know everything
I am so exhausted as most here are. I need a moment to vent some frustrations. Why is it family and friends from out of state feel the need to input opinions after little to no contact except maybe a 15 minute phone conversation every 4-6 months. One has little to no knowledge of disease progression let alone what has…
-
GriefShare
Looking in my area for support resources and little if any available but I did see where GriefShare holds an introductory one day session for those who have lost a spouse. I attended yesterday and it was interesting in hearing several stories from others about their loss. However, their 13 week workshop seems to be open to…