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Taking the car keys
Hi - I'm new and this is my first post here. My 86 yo dad has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's and dementia and was told not to drive by his Neurologist at the time of diagnosis a couple of weeks ago. I took the key fobs but he found the backup manual keys. I am trying to avoid a confrontation when I take the remaining keys…
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Feel Lost, Need Advice with Mom's Dementia/Alzheimers, Living and Depression
Mom was diagnosed 3 years ago with dementia. We believe she is about 5 - 6 years into it though. She also has severe depression, diagnosed 30 years ago. She is in an AL, but absolutely hates the place. This is her 4th home in 3 years, and the smallest so far (IL, AL, MC, AL). She is again in a severe depression, they seem…
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Are PWD capable of any kind of understanding of consequences?
My DH is probably in stage 5. Recently he has been accusing me of having a boyfriend and going out on dates when I am not visiting him. He is very crude in his description of what I am doing with this boyfriend, and does not believe any of my assurances that this is not true. I can't seem to get him off the subject and he…
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Defeated
My LO is borderline late moderate early late stage. A scan for a separate ailment shows what is most likely cancer. As upset as I've been part of me doesn't know why as the Alzheimer's is terminal in a sense. I'm alone and am crushed.
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From Maybe to Reality
This past week, I poured out my feelings of guilt about being impatient with my DH to our pastor. Ignore any lack of compassion for the caretaker here, I wasn't looking for that. The entireity (sp?) of his response was who was treating him, was it a local doctor and how I needed to take him into the nearest large city to…
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Try to keep control in the very early stages
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Incontinent briefs
I ordered 3 pair of incontinent briefs for DH, trying to find an interim solution for the drips and dribbles. I am pleased with the quality but surprised by one thing…the width of the crotch. I wondered if anyone considered this: the crotch from edge to edge is over 6" wide, exactly between the legs. Surely that is going…
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It’s Time to Get Help In the House
Hi Everyone- it’s time for me to begin to have some help here at the house. My wife will hate it but I can’t safely leave her alone anymore. Ugh! I have several options that I know of, and they go from high end to “not sure”. $48/hr to $15. Highly credentialed to more of a crap shoot (which this whole thing feels like no…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 2/15/25
BE STRONG AND COURAGEOUS! Joshua 1:9 New International Version 9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9Amplified Bible, Classic Edition 9 Have not I commanded you? Be strong, vigorous, and very…
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Looking to connect first time . New
Hi names Tom , caregiver for wife , she has Alzheimer little over 3 years , middle stage and struggling . We both are . Finally reaching out . I am turning 80 in May , this is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life . And saddest . Married 63 years , who would have guessed . Don't know what else say right now , but…
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Now I have time to be sad
I hope this is not inappropriate. My very, very elderly LO is safe now and in a steady decline. The analogy I use is that mentally and physically it is like a train slowly pulling away. But I tell myself that she is well looked after and treated with respect and affection at her MC. She still seems to know me and is not…
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Delusions of Persecution -- What to do?
Brand new here, so I apologize if this has been covered before elsewhere, but I'm at my wit's end. My mother has been living in the early stages of Alzheimer's for a few years now (forgetting things, no short term memory, having more and more trouble completing thoughts). Just recently my Dad had a (minor) stroke and was…
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Clogging Toilet
Good Morning! My father keeps clogging toilet - I believe he is flushing too much toilet paper down toilet. Any advice for this?
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Scared and unsure
Iam so new to all this I apologize I just don’t know where to turn. My husband is showing signs of memory loss and it’s scary. I’ve got him to go to his pcp but I have no idea what is ahead. Iam having anxiety attacks and can’t seem to function well myself. This is a hell. I am just reaching out because I have no one to…
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Thank you all!
In my last post, I told how DH had the car key. That night, he left the key in the car while he was packing to go home, again. He asked me if I had the key, I reminded him that he had it last, but I knew the key must be in the car if the doors were unlocked. So, I told him I would help him look and sat in the driver seat.…
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New here and overwhelmed
Hello I am currently caring for my husband and am overwhelmed. The Doctor just confirmed he is in the early stages. Presented some approaches to dealing with this including the infusions. I shared this with my husband today and he didn't express much interest. Said it sounded like it wasn't safe and just not worth it. I am…
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Not taking it well...
Hi, I am totally new to this...writing and my husband behavior. I also have a hard time with sharing about our life but my daughter told me...mom find some group for your self I can't help you. My husband developed sings of dementia last year in february which we didn't noticed right away. It has been getting slowly…
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Car Keys
I have kept the car keys away from DH for several months now. Just now, he was verbally abusive and aggressive about the key fob that I had. He badgered and threatened until I gave them to him. I am so afraid he will drive off now. Though he just went to the garage and came back in. What do you do in these circumstances?
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 2/15/25
BE STRONG AND COURAGEOUS! Joshua 1:9 New International Version 9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9Amplified Bible, Classic Edition 9 Have not I commanded you? Be strong, vigorous, and very…
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Slow fade
Just venting some sadness to those who understand...no dramatic changes with my mom (today), but the slow fade continues. I sat with her at dinner in MC today. Had to put the spoon in her hand to get her to eat a few bites of soup. She's handling finger foods best now. Had a small sandwich but didn't pick it all up, just…
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Travelers to Unimaginable Lands
Sending best wishes to everyone. It’s two years since I joined this forum and since I’ve given up paid work entirely to care for my DH with Alz. Thinking back and looking at photos, it’s at least 5 years since he’s been certifiably loopy. It took me almost all this time to really get a handle on things & I know things will…
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Feeling stuck - Drugs, gambling, elder financial abuse, mental health??
Hi, this is my 1st post: My MIL was living w/her grandson, who stole $15K+ from her. Spent it on drugs & gambling. She was living on her own before he convinced her to move hundreds of miles from her home to live w/him & his husband for 3 yrs. The two had a domestic dispute this past Oct, the grandson got into a fight…
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DH's friend is stirring up trouble...
This person thinks I'm imprisoning my DH by keeping him in memory care instead of moving him to AL or independent living or back home. He doesn't agree with my care plan for my DH. I responded by saying "he's my husband, not yours!" whether you agree with me or not. He says he's done some research and can challenge my…
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Losing glasses in nursing facility
Thanking you all for your suggestions. I feel it is going to be a neverending battle. I thought of getting a strap to hold them on but don't know if that is a good idea. Compared to what everyone else is going through, this is nothing.
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Incontinence
My mom currently lives in an assisted living community with my dad and struggles with incontinence. She is asked on a regular basis if she has to use the bathroom, always saying no, then will have an accident 5 minutes later. I truly believe she doesn't know she has to go, but I don't know how help her and my dad. We got a…
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Leqembi/Kisunla
My dad was recently diagnosed by his neurologist with Alzheimer's. He is 63 and is still considered to be in the "normal" to mild cognitive function. His neurologist said he is a great candidate for Leqembi or Kisunla. We are having a hard time choosing between the two. Does anyone have any experience with either? Our…
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POA granted
My mom has finally agreed for me to act as POA, not "springing" like it was originally. I now am legally responsible for her and hope I can do a good job. I will ask for guidance if necessary.
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Losing glasses in nursing facility
My DH has been in a nursing facility for 3 weeks and he has broken and lost a pair of glasses. Unfortunately I didn't put his name on the second pair, so don't think there is a chance they will return. Any ideas besides putting his name on them. It is going to be an expensive if he keeps losing them.
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Why caregivers go nuts
While waiting for his doctor’s appointment DH took a pamphlet off a table and read it intensely for 10 minutes. He then handed it to me to see if I would like to read it. I glanced at it and said it was interesting. It was written completely in Spanish. We don’t know Spanish. Hmmmm Last week DH lost his house keys. We…
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Spinning headache
mom diagnosed with Al this month. She constantly having spinning headaches, she’s feels her head is heavy, wearing a heavy helmet pressure against her head. Any suggestions? Thank you in advance