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Excessive Sleeping and Managing Hydration & Nutrition
My wife is progressively sleeping longer and longer. She was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in 2020, but was afflicted before then. In January 2024 she was sleeping about 12 hours per night. In September we began logging her daily activities in a Day Planner and that has been very useful to allow our care team to communicate…
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DH does not know w
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Doesn’t want to go anywhere
My DW doesn’t want to visit family or friends both locally and long distance anymore. I’m thinking it because maybe she doesn’t remember them. Half the time she asks me what my name is. Should I just not worry and take her anyway. I’ve read that changes aren’t good. Maybe I should just accept that our days staying home are…
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This Cruel, Cruel disease
Today I took my husband to Respite Care for 2 days. Just a few months ago I would have never thought I would do that but things have changed so much. My DH is not a husband anymore and I am truly just his caregiver. I needed the break. Never would I have thought it would come to this as he was the man I loved more than I…
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Losing/hiding things
Mom (87) was recently diagnosed and declining rapidly. I’ve been staying with her and dad for extended periods of time to help while she adjusts to new meds. She doesn’t recognize items around the house-cooking utensils, her own clothes, linens, food in the cabinets/refrigerator and I have many times “claimed” them as mine…
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Good hospital bed mattress for mom - foam versus innerspring?
Hello, The hospital bed mattress that my mom had for years needs to be replaced. I had made a hole in it to help with pee and it turned out to be a bad do-it-yourself-hack and the inner coils rusted when moisture got in where I cut the bed. Lesson learned, never puncture a hospital bed. I'm now debating whether to get…
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From NYT: She's Trying to Stay Ahead of Alzheimer's...
Trigger Warning: This article discusses the euthanasia in the context of dementia and capacity to make that decision. https://www.nytimes.com/2025/02/16/health/assisted-death-alzheimers-netherlands.html?unlocked_article_code=1.xU4.tbXQ.v-oE6OJf1pgh&smid=url-share
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underwear question
I bought the first box of male guards for leaks and dribbles for DH. I am wondering (haven't opened the box yet), are these basically the same thing as pad for ladies but made in masculine color? Maybe I'll use up the old ones I have first, any reason why not? I had to buy a box of 52, so maybe I could take the m back?
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Easy website for answers questions about my father's condition
My father has had Alzheimer's Disease for the past 7+ years and has progressed into a later stage. I've had lots of questions along the way and I'm finding it really frustrating to search and visit lots of websites for simple answers. Just discovered pfizer has a new website that answers questions. I put in some questions…
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Dermotologist: When to Stop
My DW had a small spot removed a couple of years ago. A tiny melanoma we caught early. Her father had a bunch of these taken off over the years and it got harder to manage as he went downhill with his dementia. He'd pick at the scabs and they would take forever to heal. Her other sister also has considerable melanoma…
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Relocation
I am caring for my uncle, and we have reached a point where we feel like his living alone is not in his best interest. I have secured new housing arrangements, but we're struggling with how to break the news that we will be moving him from his home of 60 plus years. He sits alone with no interaction with anyone and little…
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traveling with spouse with dementia- beginning stages
Husband has posterior cortical atrophy so forgets things easily, has no peripheral vision. But we love to travel. Considering the Caribbean to escape MN winter. We love to walk together. Plan to stay in one place from approx march 3-10. any ideas? thanks. Lois
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Worried about return to workplace
I don't know if I'm the only one here who is a Fed. But now with the return to the workplace my sister and I are scrambling trying to figure out the best way someone can be with mom during the day that is affordable. Everything is so stressful with the info coming from above changing daily - sometimes hourly. I don't know…
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Night time sleeplessness and pain
I am noticing a pattern of my dad being in a lot of pain at night. Is this part of sundowners, or Parkinson's or Alzheimers? He has them all on top of a collapsed hip ball. The hip would be a logical explanation for pain, but it is a pattern no matter how much pain meds he is given. He stays up most of the night shifting…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 2/8/25
THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD Psalm 23 Amplified Bible A Psalm of David. 23 The Lord is my Shepherd [to feed, to guide and to shield me], I shall not want. 2 He lets me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still and quiet waters. 3 He refreshes and restores my soul (life); He leads me in the paths of righteousness…
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My timeline taking montelukast
This February marks nine years that I have been taking the anti-inflammatory asthma drug montelukast multiple times a day for treating the extreme mental fatigue that I was experiencing. Here is a timeline of events. 1995 - My mother was diagnosed with early stage Alzheimers. 2009 - I retired from the the Department of…
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Bringing him home for now
Those of you who were on this site last year may remember my distress at putting DH in memory care in February. I have never been so desolate and could not accept that he couldn't be at home. I entertained the idea of having him half-in, half-out (thanks to all of you who told me this was a bad idea) and thought about…
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Ombudsmen, Residents, and Retaliation in Assisted Living Facilities
Michael Ellenbogen sent me this detailed report on problems in assisted living facilities. The second link is to an article on the report. https://www.mcknightsseniorliving.com/news/ombudsmen-can-be-partners-in-ensuring-resident-dignity-safety-expert-says/
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Wife will not help herself
my wife of 57 years has AD, MMD and high anxiety. She refuses to take walks, exercise of any form, stopped doing anything around the house, because of hip and knee replacements, cannot cook anymore because she can’t remember how. She constantly picks at me for how dirty the house is when I’ve cleaned it and how bad my…
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Is there any other way to relieve agitation besides medication?
My dear grandmother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's last year, and just in the previous few months, she has gotten worse. She has been yelling, berating, and crying lately, more like a manic patient. Sometimes she yells at my grandpa, mom, and aunts over a small thing. We are all heartbroken. And she refuses to take her…
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Over Stimulation
My DH son and girlfriend recently visited with their 2 year old grandson and he was SO loud and rambunctious. The next morning my DH didn't feel well, said he was cold (no fever) was stumbling and talking completely out of his head about something we couldn't understand. I think he lost most of the day. Later in the…
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From Maybe to Reality
Just need to share with someone who won't have to carry my burden…i.e. the kids. Twice within this week DH has told me he isn't thinking very well. It is possibly because he has been working on the taxes. I thought that he would be able to gather all the necessary paperwork this year and we planned on filling out the forms…
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F&$! Dementia
I sometimes have a mouth of a sailor, but seriously, to hell with this cruel disease. Woke up at 5am with poop all over the bathroom floor and it all over my DW’s legs. She’s so confused and doesn’t know why it’s happening. So bowel incontinence has started. I wish I could pull dementia out of her and kick its awful, mean…
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Please get rid of all the spam messages on this site
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Social security disability claim denied
UPDATE 2/20/25: the local office was closed because of a snow storm (no more working from home I guess) so we called the national line and waited on hold for 2 hours (yes that’s right, can’t wait to see if AI decreases wait times in the future) just to find out that the person on the phone didn’t seem to be able to find…
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APHASIA the sadness of not being able to communicate
My DH is stage 5 or 6 dementia with very advanced APHASIA. Within himself and between us we are very happy but it’s so sad we often only communicate by touch, smiles and often single words. He was always a great talker and during the night or early morning he will have a great conversation with me and I often can’t…
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Info on types of accounts, roles to have help managing finances
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New to group any advice
don’t know if I’m even at the place I need to be🤷♀️. My husband was told 8 months ago he had Alzheimer’s. He refuses to talk about it or tell anyone. Actually he’s in denial and says he just missed a couple questions. Spend most of his day away from me,,, he can’t relax never could,, and it’s like he gonna show people…
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Compassionate Allowances Act (faster payment for SSDI)
I’ve noticed some people believe they have to wait the two year period to received SSDI for Alzheimer’s. This is not true. If you are denied, please contact social security and make sure you are being reviewed under compassionate allowances. Read below. Thankfully, since 2010 Social Security has helped by adding…
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My 93 Year Old Mom With Late Stage Dementia Broke Her Hip Yesterday
My 93 year old mom is in late stage dementia and broke her hip yesterday. She’s lived with me for 6 years and this is the first major issue that requires a hospital stay and potential surgery. I’m waiting to speak with the orthopedic doctor and get his recommendations on treatment. I feel so guilty about what has happened.…