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How or if to tell my parents they are moving to memory care
I am about to move my parents into memory care in a few weeks. They are both 95 with stage 4/5 dementia. They have been living in assisted living for the past 4 years so the move would just be across the courtyard to a more secure facility with more support. My question for this group is when, how, or if to tell them they…
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Hospital stay for medication adjustment?
Hello, all. My DW has been in skilled nursing care for several months. She has later-stage Alzheimers but also physical limitations — needs help with eating, toileting, walking on 24/7 basis. She became more agitated and combative in recent weeks so SNC staff said she needed to go to hospital psych unit for medication…
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Things have calmed down
So I made a few posts here earlier this month about my mom and how my parents were struggling. I think we've gotten past the crisis point that occurred - my dad has said he's doing a lot better at keeping things calm at home with my mom. I do think at least some of the worst of what was going on was due to my dad's hip…
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Mom doesnt listen
My mom is early onset Alzheimers and is experiencing some cognitive decline but not to the extent that I can contact the agency on aging for a caregiver. She can still bathe herself, etc. However, she does not listen to or obey what I tell her no matter what the reasoning. Right now, I am the only one available to take…
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Lorazepam/Ativan taken daily???
My husband has developed a periodic urgency about the need to get to school to administer a test (college professor for 30 years) and becomes very agitated that I’m not helping him do that. The hospice nurse recommended I give him a dose of Lorazepam to calm him down. I’ve done this now twice and both times he sleeps for…
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Anyone able to keep alzheimer spouse home until death
I have been trying to find anyone with experience keeping spouse at home with help of hospice until the end. My husband is finishing up stage 6 right now. And so far I have been sole caregiver with no outside help. He is 71 can still walk. Can eat on his own like a 2 year old. I have to shower and dress him. He just had…
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Leqembi infusions
Hello. I'm new to the group. My husband was recently diagnosed with MCI due to AD, 66 yo. + APOE 4. Needless to say, we are devastated. He's had mild memory loss for about 6 months. Tried aricept but had terrible GI symptoms. He's been tolerating Namenda. I haven't noticed must improvement with his ST memory. However,…
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Mother lives across country and has early stage dementia
Mother lives across the country and insists she is taking her medications regularly, but her BP says something different. She tells her doctor that she is taking her meds and feels that the doctor is calling her a liar. I know she is not taking them regularly, and she meets the criteria of loss of memory for the early…
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overnight pullups advice for incontinence
Hello wonderful people, I was wondering if anyone has advice for a brand of overnight pull-ups that is the most absorbent. Lately my LO often soaks through even the brands that say they hold the most liquid. He does sleep over 12 hours sometimes, so i know that would be a challenge for any product. Our family has tried…
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How fast does Zoloft work?
My mom is 83yo, in mild to moderate Alzheimers. I don't know which stage exactly, just that she has plaque on several parts of her brain. The neurologist says her stage is dependent on her behavior and abilities. She's been taking donepezil for about 2 months now. Took 6 weeks to get her to 10mg. She has been getting…
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Moving my mom - which is best
My mom was told she has Alzheimer’s about 2 weeks ago. I think it is early. We have noticed trouble with remembering she has told us something and I know it took her 2 hours to pay a bill not remembering whether she had told us something call the bank or call the credit card company. My friend, who is currently helping…
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No Appetite
My mom hasn’t been eating or drinking for a few weeks. We brought her to ER for IV fluids and the PT recommended a rehab facility to get her eating, drinking, and moving again. Great plan except that she has no appetite and everything tastes bad to her. Even foods she loves. She is excited to eat it and then stops after a…
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Wedding anniversary...
I might already know the answer to this question, but I thought I would put it out here. My DW's wedding anniversary is next week Wednesday. On most days I'm her best friend and "where is my husband?". Do I potentially stir the pot or just let our anniversary pass going unrecognized? It's sad. I'm leaning toward it going…
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Downsizing
My wife has had Alzheimer's for 8 years and is now in Stage 6. Care giving is difficult, can't even remember when the difficult part started. My plan has been to keep her at home as long as possible since I think she would be happiest in a familiar environment and my undivided attention has got to be better that what…
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Just venting
Yesterday was not a good day for my DW….It was a total delusional day. she thought there was people in the house, her dead sister, father, mother and our sons who live in another state. when no one has been here. She has been started on a new medication which seems to have very little effect, but it is early. She got up…
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Bedridden mother w/dental issues
Hello. I care for my 89 year old mother who has severe Alzheimer's and has been bedridden since falling and breaking her hip in February of last year. She has visiting hospice nurses twice a week, and (by the grace of God) is doing well, overall for her circumstances. My Mom has a full upper partial, which had previously…
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My DW's mom was going to visit, and then couldn't.
My DW's mom has Alzheimer's also. She is 88 but she is not as advanced as my DW. My DW's stepdad attempted to drive my DW's mom from Florida to visit my DW here in Indiana. They got as far as Tennessee and had to turn around. My DW's mom got confused and agitated and insisted on going home. I have read that it's nearly…
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To Pee or not to Pee
I thought I was prepared for the day my DW would become incontinent. A couple of weeks ago I woke up to my DW laying in bed unclothed. Apparently she wet the bed and then took off her clothes and went back to sleep. I got everything cleaned up. I had bought pull ups last month, so I removed all her underware and replaced…
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The end is near.
Apri 9th I fell the end is near. They have padded bandages on her elbows now because she sits in a wheelchair all day and can't move. They try to move her hands and she won't let them. I fear she has given up. They told me today, that they have started turning her every two hours to prevent her from getting any more bed…
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Help me please
I am so burned out and feeling alone. My husband is 86 yrs old and I am 73. Been married for 43 years. The regular doctor says he has dementia or Alzheimer’s . He now refuses to go to any doctor or to receive any help from hospice or anyone. He has mood swings very often which plays on me and my wellbeing. Not to get in…
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Isolation
My sweet DH with VD Aphasia and stage 7 has been more agitated than usual. Because of his Aphasia I have taken to using my phone more and more for keeping in touch with family and friends, doing the accounts, ordering meals and other essentials online (it’s so hard to get to the shops), checking the news (the radio is…
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Bathroom accidents
Hi everyone. My mother is the primary caregiver for my father, who has Alzheimer’s that has been progressing quickly. We need some advice. Over the past few months, he has started having significant difficulties with toileting hygiene. He’ll use the bathroom but is no longer able to complete the wiping process — usually…
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New controversy with Donanemab (marketed in the US as Kisunla)
Donanemab: Conflicts of interest found in FDA committee that approved new Alzheimer’s drug https://www.bmj.com/content/386/bmj.q2010
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How do I respond to my parent talking about me as if I were someone else?
As life would have it, my parent who I just moved over a thousand miles is now seemingly fuzzy about who I am (her only daughter). She 100% recognized me back in late January. When healthcare professionals ask, "who is that sitting next to you?" She will answer "my daughter" and say my name and act like it's a ridiculous…
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When shouting is necessary to avoid harm?
I realize it's best to redirect, distract, avoid any actions to lead to failure, but if a PWD is about to cause harm or an accident, it may be necessary to forcefully pull their body or hand away from harm, or shout to stop it. For example, if I look away for a moment, PWD walks inand a) put hands on a hot stove or b)…
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Hoyer Lift in Nursing Home
My DH is in a 5 star medicare rated nursing home. His mobility has decreased to where he needs a 2 person hoyer lift for assist. The aide operated the lift alone and when I questioned it the aide said it's ok. I mentioned it at my husband's care plan meeting and the aide got some type of reprimand. The aide no longer…
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Mom at my wedding?
I would really like my mom to be at my wedding but thinking about the logistics is a lot. She lives in memory care 1 hour from the venue. I would help her with getting ready and getting here there but I’m worried about everything after when I won’t be as available for bathroom help, reorienting, keeping her from wandering…
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A Different Perspective Today
Almost nine months since I lost my DW to this nightmare disease. Deep in grief now and hard to see a way out of it. Day to day, it is all I can do for now. And then, as I was reflecting on my situation and that of so many others on this forum, a new view of my situation emerged. I hate being where I am without my DW. But,…
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Vitamin B12 1000 MCG
When we went to our Neurologist for the first time in February, he noticed that my DH's Vitamin B was very low so he advised us to take 1000 MCG per day. After 2 months of taking it, I noticed some real changes in my DH. More REAL conversations, less shuffling of his feet and much less napping during the day. We had our…
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Witness of My Mother’s Passing
This piece is a witness to my mother’s final days with Alzheimer’s. I wrote it some time ago, but I wasn’t ready to share it until now. For privacy, I’ve changed names and identifying details, including her last name and the town where we lived. This piece includes honest descriptions of the dying process, including…