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Do they know… or should they know
I think she knows she has Alzheimer’s… do I remind her when she is confused or struggling? Or never bring it up again?
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Tracking
As we are starting down this road I have found tons of great advice and support here. My LO still drives locally, alone every Monday to counseling and back. 12 miles each way. Today she was gone and I realized she was late by 2.5 hours. The answer was an expected "I told you I was going shopping", she did not. Am I…
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Beginning to Resent My Mom
Hello everybody! My dear spouse recommended I write about my recent feelings in here to vent, maybe get some more insight. I am 26 and am the main caretaker for my mom for about 5 years now since her Alzheimer's diagnosis in 2022. Her main "team" is myself, my spouse, and my best friend who moved in with us. I realized I…
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Knitting saved my life
Last summer I was stuck at home caring for my DH who has mixed dementia. It was just about impossible to do anything except take care of him. Some days he stayed awake all day with no naps. Last August I found some knitting needles. I was taught how to knit as a child and stopped knitting more than 50 years ago. I…
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New to Caregiving
I know I'm not the Lone Ranger when it comes to facing the challenges of caring for a LO with this disease. The level of pain to see my DW struggle with tasks that 2 years ago were done without a second thought are hard to verbalize or put down on paper. As I watch her struggle, any attempt to help is quickly and curtly…
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Quiet Weekend = Worry
Why is it when I get a quiet weekend I am more paranoid of what might come in the following days is going to be a big one. This past weekend I had 2 calls, both for an alert that dad fell AGAIN, trying to get to the bathroom or just out of bed. Both times they didn't seem worried, but I was. I mean one of the times he hit…
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First bowel movement disaster
I've been used to the urine accidents but this bowel movement accident is at a different level. I won't go into the details. Let's just say it took me an hour or two to clean it up. My DW was so apologetic about it. She kept saying over and over, "That wasn't me." I just reassured her that everything is okay. It took me to…
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After hospice respite
My spouse returned home from a 5 day respite stay at a local hospice house severely deconditioned. Was using a walker with stand by assist and now he can barely stand. I left them a note with our daily schedule at home, but I wish I had made it clear how many feet he ambulated daily. I needed the break, but now I wonder if…
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Surprise Surprise !!!
When it was time for me to start helping my DW with taking her medications, after reading all the stories of others having difficulty with their LO taking medications, I was so happy that she took her meds without any argument. She always took a big drink and I assumed that down her throat went the meds. I was cleaning out…
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Need help with parent with Alzheimer’s who won’t shower
Hello everyone, I’m new to this forum and trying to navigate this horrible disease that my mother has. She refuses to get a shower or even allow anyone to wipe her down. I’ve tried everything from playing calming music, getting in the shower with her, and just constantly reassuring her. She becomes extremely agitated and…
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I am new to all of this.
My wife has been suffering short term memory loss for a few years and though I tried she would not see a doctor. Earlier this month she had a massive delusion. Forgot who I was after 49 years of marriage or that we have lived in our home for over 20 years. We went to the ER and I am still waiting to get a neurologist…
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Sibling Disagreement on Care
My 85-year-old mother was diagnosed with dementia 7 years ago. My older father insisted on caring for her and hiding how bad things were from my sister and me. We started 4 years ago to try to get him to consider in-home care or assisted living. He finally agreed and they moved into a lovely community in October. However,…
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How to cope with early onset decline of my sister long distance
Hi. I live in AZ, my sister and her family in WI. For some time she has had memory issues. She was only diagnosed 2 mths ago and is 66. Last weekend my nephew told me she is in decline, not eating, and is now in her own world. .I am going back to WI shortly. Personally I am crushed. As a nurse I know the support they need.…
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Traveling Internationally With Dementia, Wandering Concerns, and Medical Alert Bracelet Recommendati
My dad is taking my mom to Mexico for stem cell treatment related to her dementia. He is going alone as her sole support person/caregiver. i’ve tried everything I could to try to stop this trip from happening not only does the procedure scare me with a alone. This is something that my dad is determined to do. My mom is a…
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DH doesn’t allow me to go to medical appointments
My DH of 50+ years has always been “difficult” and fiercely private. He goes to the VA for his medical care and has 100% disability rating. He has shown signs for a few years of cognitive decline and then was also in an accident 5 years ago where he had a tbi in the frontal region. He refuses to allow me to go to any of…
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Stress, guilt, confusion
My oldest sister told me she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's a month ago. I know she's had mild memory loss for years, but she hid it well. It still seems mild to me, but I've never known anyone with this disease. She calls me to tell me that I never call her, although we speak frequently. When the conversation starts, she…
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Do we pretend we're not caregivers with our Loved ones?
Here I am again, to vent or get support, or ask for advice. I'm just so numb with this journey I'm not sure what I'm wanting. Andsorry in advance as I know this will be long. I need to get it all of my chest and this is the only place I can do that. My DH is in mid stage 5 probably. Still able to care for himself, but…
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New to this group. Living overseas, trying to help mother who insists she is "fine"
Hello! I am living overseas and trying to support my mother in WA state who is clearly going through a decline. She is still independent in the sense that she can drive (short distances to routine locations around town), walks at a track daily and prepares simple meals (salads and microwaved foods). However, her short term…
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When your LO changes their minds
First let me say hello, I am new in this group. But not new to caregiving. That’s another story… This is about my sister is 91 and diagnosed as stage 4 with Alzheimer. She lives alone on the west coast. She still is quite intelligent, humorous and “with it” in terms of knowing friends and family and her long term memory is…
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A Visit, Perhaps
It's been nearly 6 months since my dear Suze passed away. I had 3 very busy months of memorial planning and respite trips away that I'd planned before she had passed. I was riding quite high on gratitude of knowing she wasn't suffering anymore and knowing how lucky we were to share the deep love we had. Still pretty high…
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recurrent UTIs
has anyone figured out how to address these for their parent? my mom keeps getting them. she lives with an aide but the aide is not paid to change her in the middle of the night. I dont know if that's what is causing these but they keep coming back and she is getting weaker and weaker. she takes cranberry each day. and she…
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Any Caregivers in or near Buford, Georgia?
Looking for other full time caregivers locally to me, that maybe we can connect and support each other. I am a full time caregiver for my father with dementia. I have siblings that do not help out with my dad and so it makes me feel alone. It would be nice to be able to help others and also find some like minded people to…
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Change of my getting a new car has caused the worst confusion ever
My DH and I only have one car and I do most of the driving. It’s a very old car and recently has become unreliable, so I took him with me to a dealership and bought a new car. This has caused severe confusion and he can’t seem to grasp that we now have a different car. He woke up in the middle of the night and was very…
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Is this the best we can do?
I'm sitting here waiting for my wife to die. She hasn't eaten and taken fluids in 7 days. Hospice tells me her body is shutting down and that she is not really suffering. And yet we are giving her morphine and ativan to "keep her comfortable". In this society we can put our animals "asleep" when they are terminal to keep…
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Driving - any ideas on softening the blow?
My husband has Alzheimers and is slowly getting worse. 3 doctors and some friends have said he shouldn't be driving. He went for a road test but failed the eye test so couldn't do the road test then went to an optometrist who said he was Ok to drive and sent in the forms from the DMV. We haven't heard from DMV and I made…
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Needing to talk to someone, anyone who can relate
My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in February. This was after years of me pushing and pushing. Till she finally realized she needed help. She would get lost while driving every day. At that point she was still working 12-hour shifts 3 days a week. We got the diagnosis and everything turned upside down. She couldn't…
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Stuck & Need Some Hope
I am and utilizing as many resources as I can to try and get my mom to possibly get into a memory care unit or home health care. She is starting to get more aggressive I feel like I am in an abusive relationship. I don't know what my day is going to be like good or bad. We are still working with adjusting her medication so…
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New & Scared
Hello, my husband just had a brain scan and one doctor said it showed early signs of Alzheimer's. When we went to see his general practitioner and the doctor who ordered the scan, he said no that the scan showed normal narrowing of arteries & veins and some shrinkage of the brain that he found normal for a 79 yr old man. I…
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I did the best that I could
I get tired of hearing about the people who were able to care for their spouses at home until the spouse passed away. I cared for my DH for as long as I could. His doctor and much of my family tell me I took care of him a few months longer than I should have. My DH was mean and angry most of the time. He wouldn't let me…
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Need to vent about my brother
Mom is diabetic and has edema in her legs. She refuses to wear support stockings and eats any sweet treat she is offered, yet asks me every time I bring her snacks if they are low calorie (not low carb), because she is worried about her diabetes. If I buy her low carb stuff she doesn’t like it, so I’m usually vague and…