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Unmarried partner not living together
My bf of 77yrar d has had memory issues and I asked him to get evaluated. After months and months with several steps along the way he has been diagnosed with MCI. I can’t keep track of everything he does and it seems like he is forgetting a lot of things. Seems he thought he was scammed the other day and called ti make a…
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What I miss the most
No question just how I feel. I have had a couple of drinks and am sitting in an empty house thinking (drinking and thinking maybe a dangerous combination). I have been married for 49 years and during the first 25 years I thought we had as close to perfect marriage as possible. the last 24 years has been much less than…
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Sudden mental changes
My spouse (70) was recently retested using the MMSE test, her score went from 19 a year ago to 11. Over the past 6 weeks we have experienced significant shifts in personality and overall happiness. Before very generous, she has become very me/mine focused. She does recognize that we are married (48 years), last night…
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A good day!
I wanted to post something positive for a change. 🙂 Today was one of those days with my DH where I say to myself “I can take care of him, no problem”. He was a little bit confused and quiet when he first got up, but was in a good mood all day, no outbursts of anger, only a quick little mention of going “home”, easy to…
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Don’t know how to start, Long Rant Warning!! ⚠️
Okay, I guess I’ve officially “lost it”! I shouldn’t have, but I did. I flew off the handle and screamed and yelled at DW(stage 5/6) this afternoon. I stormed around the house, upset the dogs, and ended with us each going to our separate “corners”. I was an ass, it was bad! The ridiculous last straw was DW trying to feed…
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Home to his parents in the evening
For about a week, DH has been adamant about going hime to his parents or calling his father, etc. Usually it starts around 4:00 so I’m assuming he’s starting to sundown. It’s so hard coming up with fiblets that will satisfy him. I’ve tried so many of the ideas I’ve seen on this forum. Sometimes we drive around, going…
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THE DAY SHE COULDN’T DRAW A CLOCK
I read this today and it touched me greatly. THE DAY SHE COULDN'T DRAW A CLOCK “From the memoir-in-progress by Michael J. Whelan The technician handed Rebecca a piece of paper and gave her what should have been a simple task. “Draw a clock,” he said gently. “Put the numbers where they belong, just like a regular clock…
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Tramadol Question
Hi All - So my mom is in assisted living on Hospice care for over a year now. She is in a Broda chair and they now use a Hoyer lift getting her into bed/shower etc. She is down to 95 pounds. I would say late stage 5 or early 6. She has been taking Tramadol 2x a day (morning and night). A Hospice nurse called and said that…
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Pisa syndrome (Pleurothotonus)
Hi friends. I haven't been on the site for a while, nor have I kept up with dementia related things. It is just over three years since I entered stage 8. So please take whatever I say with a grain of salt, and do your own research if needed. But I just wanted to pass this on in case it had not been discussed here. For…
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My sister has POA-medical. But we need DPOA for my mom, who has moderate Alzheimer's.
My mom can't make her own medical decisions due to advancing Alzheimer's. Right now my sister only has HIPPA-level access to my mom's medical info per the existing POA, which was drawn up years ago when she just had mild cog impairment as a dx . Do we need anything beyond a doctor's letter (or two?) and an eldercare lawyer…
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Mom is getting worse
She sleeps all the time, my family when they visit they wake her up to feed her. Then she goes to sleep. When I see her,all I see is pain and anguish in her eyes. I feel her pain and she says it with her eyes why am I alive? I seriously would have taken her off her medications and stopped feeding her years ago but my hands…
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Angry right now
Anyone out there ever get frustrated to the point of even being angry at the total LACK of answers available for this disease? My mom is in (I think) Stage 4 Alzheimers. But then it could be Stage 5. I can’t get a good answer from a doctor. There are no good answers. No good answers on how long I can expect each stage to…
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Pill box questions
My father is still living on his own about 15-20 min away from myself and my siblings. Our mother passed away in December and he's getting adjusted. My sister bought him an electronic pill container with an alarm. She fills it once a week for him. He's still self sufficient and refuses to go into a facility of any kind…
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10 Absolutes in Dementia Care list
Recently shared by another member here. Thanks @Chug
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Recomendacion para un Geriatrico doctor que hable español en los angeles county?
Hola, mi mama (75) ayer fue diagnosticada con alzheimer's. Esta en las primeras etapas y el hipocampo apenas se esta agrandando. Tengo muchas preguntas pero no se ni donde empezar. Vivimos en los angeles, yo vivo con mi esposo y mi hermana mayor. Mi mama vive sola a 5min de nuestro apartamento y la visitamos diario. No…
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Long post. Beautifully written. 💜
From Michael J Whelan who is fighting cancer and his wife has Parkinson’s. “I'M SO TIRED! There’s a moment in this journey when denial dies quietly in the corner, and hope, the stubborn candle, flickers but does not go out. It is here when the neurologist stops suggesting, and starts testing. Not reflexes or memory games…
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Therapist for father who is primary caregiver
Looking for an organization that specializes in virtual therapy/psychology services for caregivers.
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From Kerrville, I Thank You ALL for your Thoughts and Prayers
Greetings everyone. My family and I are safe and accounted for. I'm sure you are aware of the tremendous damage in Central Texas. The loss of life is unimaginable and heartbreaking. I am grateful to everyone who has reached out. Your thoughts and prayers lift me up and keep me going. The community and I sincerely feel the…
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Long distance has separated us
Being long distant from a loved one has taken a toll. This has been a heartbreaking journey for all involved. Feeling hopeless and helpless and just want him here with us like he was planning on doing before Alzheimer's overtook him. Everyday is a struggle, everyday that goes by is a huge loss without him.I want to save…
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Post-hospital exhaustion for caregiver?
My father was in the hospital for two days last week. Admitted through the ER. There’s a lot to say about that—especially about the shocking lack of training by doctors to deal with a patient who has dementia—but right now I am looking for advice for myself. I was with him almost constantly in the hospital (it was…
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So many emotions
Hi All, I am reading so many posts that I can relate to and empathize with as the adult daughter of a 91 yo father with dementia. Mom just passed away in May and on June 30 I moved Dad to assisted living. He cannot be home alone and was constantly "looking for" lost keys, wallet, hearing aids, checkbook, or searching for…
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CELA question for those who have consulted
I am going to make an appt with a CELA soon eventhough we had our trust redone 6 months ago. I need to know answers about shielding assets in the event a MCF is needed in the future. I dont know if this is possible or if Medi-Cal is an option or if it even helps pay for sine MC costs. My question for all of you is: should…
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Alcohol
My 81 year old Husband has mid stage Alzheimer’s. He is still driving and basically independent. Unfortunately he’s forgotten how Alcohol (spirits) affects him. To avoid him hiding liquor I let him keep in in the pantry. Unfortunately it makes him feel better/brighter but I’ve come home 3 times last week and he’s drunk. We…
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Help with anger response
looking for help with ways to respond when mom is angry. It has gotten worse (tested for UTI and increasing 1 medication ) and I don’t know how to respond. It is “I want out of here” or “why can’t I go somewhere else” or “I just want to die” or “what do they want, they keep going through my things” or “that person is a…
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In Home care recommendations
Mom is diagnosed with dementia. We need some in home help and want to go with an agency but it's hard to know where to start. Looking for any recommendations you all have for in home agencies. We don't need a lot yet but will need more soon I think. Companionship, light meals and respite for her partner- the full time…
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New here
My older brother has recently been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, and I’m trying to understand what to expect and how best to support her. What are some things you wish you had known earlier in your journey caring for a loved one with Alzheimer’s?
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Walks hunched over
DH walks hunched over and walks very slowly. He's basically looking down all the time. He walks with his head/neck bent downward but he also sits that way all the time. When I ask him to lift his head up when I shave him, he will lift it just a little but then drops it back downward. Best I can tell is he's in stage 6, is…
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Long-distance Caregiver for mother with AZ
Hello, my 80-year-old mother seems to be declining more rapidly this year (she was diagnosed in 2020 wit AZ). She lives in NYC and I moved to Boston,MA, in July from Los Angeles, CA, partly to be closer to her to make caregiving easier. She is very challenging, however, and I often feel lost as to what she needs because…
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HEARING AIDS
This is a very practical question. My wife has mid to early late stage dementia. She has delusions and hallucinations about "a man" who comes into her room and removes, moves, or takes her things. Because of this, she routinely hides her hearing aids. This usually happens before she takes a shower or before she goes to…
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Is this Stage 5 and to what degree?
My mom last week recognized me but didn't think of me as a daughter but maybe a cousin when I asked who do you think I am? Later in the day she kept asking what my relationship was to my brother. If I knew my Dad - I think she forgot about my Dad until we started going down memory lane. She was glad to know my dad was at…