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New at this. HELP
My wife has short term memory loss, higher than normal fear levels, general agitation and breaks down and cries far too often and easily. Don't know how to get into her world and probably support and help. Need advice and counsel ASAP.
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Struggling with mom in NH
Mom has been in NH for over a year and has quickly become aggressive, more disrespectful then normal, talking continuously without taking a breath, hitting her call light 12 times in 4 hours for nothing important, obsessing over Money and wants to purchase hundreds of dollars of stuff she doesn’t need. Calls me names and…
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Today
Good day but cooler today. Becoming Autumn. Doing fine with some gummy assistance Sat PM now but nothing is really happening now? Anyone around?
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forgetting things
hi, yesterday mum found a coffee satchet in her handbag. she had no idea how it got there. i tried to reassure her as she was thinking oh did i steel it but my mother would never do such a thing. i told her what would of happen but she panicked for an hour about it and had a panicked attack and i had to give her a valium…
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Lost laundry and the wedding dress
Mom is in AL and as you would expect some of her clothes have come up missing. Sometimes they return other times they don’t. It’s frustrating, but kind of to be expected. Mom is so frustrated she is now washing laundry in her bathroom sink. We set up something to hang things in the shower to dry. Her comprehension socks…
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Looking in the rear view mirror
Why do we spend so much time on looking in the rear view mirror? It is so useless. We ask ourselves those questions that have no satisfactory answers. We torture ourselves with guilt, regret, resentment and remorse. Why? We complain that it is so unfair that our retirement that was dreamed of and planned for ends up in…
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Delusions- how to respond
Please help me with how to respond to delusions and paranoia. My parent is very paranoid about someone stealing his items. He often hides tools and important things, forgets where he puts it, but then accuses someone of stealing. How do I respond to this without upsetting him?
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Tired
My wife is in the beginning stages she forgets a lot of daily conversations and can’t find the right words to make a sentence. I like to go exercise walk but can only be gone for two hours. She wakes up mad at me almost every day. I go walking daily just to have me time. I take care of everything, finances, cooking,…
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moving into memory care, not sure if we should wait longer
My mom has been on the waiting list at a memory care facility for a long time. My sister and I are both burnt out. There is a room available now that shares a bathroom with another person. My mom hates sharing bathrooms with strangers and gets grossed out easily by other people in her personal space. I am not sure if we…
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What I miss the most
No question just how I feel. I have had a couple of drinks and am sitting in an empty house thinking (drinking and thinking maybe a dangerous combination). I have been married for 49 years and during the first 25 years I thought we had as close to perfect marriage as possible. the last 24 years has been much less than…
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I would like to speak with someone else who has Alzheimer's
People without Alzheimer's keep responding to my entries. I would love to join a forum where I can actually interact with people who have Alzheimer's, not mci and not caregivers. Thanks
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have covid can’t visit MC
We had to move my dad who is 82 to memory care about three weeks ago because we couldn’t lift him to change him anymore. He’s in hospice with heart failure and the dementia. In the process my mom (80) and I (51) caught covid and it’s been a week but we are both still symptomatic and testing positive. We are brokenhearted…
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Can you be kicked out of MC for not complying with continence care?
I was not imagining the aids at my mom’s place were asking about taking her home. We had a follow up care meeting and the directors basically told me if my mom can’t become more compliant re: incontinence (mostly urinary) they may not be able to keep her. First off the big problem is their rugs. She needs her carpets…
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New here and need to talk to others
Hello. My name is Jacki and I am 68, diagnosed with moderate cognitive impairment that is not Alzheimer’s. Right now I’m having a heck of a time trying to convince my insurance to let me go to a huge brain and memory center run by the Universty of Washington. We have one neurologist in town who is doing a lot with…
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Caregiving for Parent when you have a full time job and a teenager
Good morning. I am new to this forum and located in Wichita, KS. My mother has some memory issues resulting from an unknown stroke about a year go but discovered after she had a fender bender last March. I am 55, work a full time job, have a 16yo at home and two dog :smile: . She has always lived independently (my dad…
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Mom is in Assisted Living now
After rehab we were able to get her directly into an Assisted Living in a new community. I was all set to go with the same community where she lived for simplicity, but they were unwilling to work with us to get her placed directly and wanted her to go back to her apartment for a week or two, even though they had a room in…
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Checking on Butterfly Wings
just aware of your absence, hope things are okay…
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It's time
My husband's progression keeps marching on. His gait has been unsteady and this week he had a bad fall. In the end he had some bad bruising, but thankfully no other injuries. He's had two more falls since. I'm finally accepting that I can't keep him safely at home. I've started the process to place him. I hate this so…
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mother refuses health aid in home
Mother is refusing the nurse to come in for home health aid and threatens to call the police and yells for nurse to leave. The she complains that I do not come to see her. When I come to care for her, she forgets all that I have done and asks over and over, when am I coming to see her. I asks her to please let the health…
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Lots of strangers coming and going at home
I started with in home care for my DH back in the summer. I'll be honest, I was so overwhelmed at the time, that just having a few hours to myself was amazing. I also had to hire contractors to do many things my husband use to do or that we would do together. I went through 3 cleaning services alone, not to mention the…
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Medicare visit
Just a vent. My Dh had a Medicare yearly visit yesterday. Most all of you know the questions that it entities. When it came to the memory (clock )he couldn't do it . Became very agitated. I had the na stop it. She was not happy. I explain he already has the diagnosis and there is no sense in upsetting him. Just FYI last…
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She wants her car
79 yr old sister-in-law recently admitted to a MC Unit after a fall and broker her arm. We knew she was declining and this accident made us realize she can no longer live alone. We immediately got DPOA & POA Healthcare. She thinks she is in a hotel “that serves meals” and wants us to bring her car so she can go home.…
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Dreadful fear and the "Dark Thoughts"
My father died Jan 2nd (1 day before his 86th birthday). He had end stage Alzheimer's and a very aggressive form of cancer which was discovered just 2 weeks before his death. My Mom is seriously struggling with reality. She calls me at LEAST once a day and tells me people are trying to get into the house and that the "dark…
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I am a caregiver for my mother and brother I also have Alzheimer's
I took care of my Mother, Brother and myself . At time I was in a stage 2 of Alzheimer's My mother recently died , and I have my brother still to care for though it is getting harder and harder. As I am in stage 3 .I would like to see if I am eligible for trial but I have not heard any thing yet .Or perhaps I got lost in…
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Incontinence (fecal)
need to buy depends or whatever is out there for hubby with fecal incontinence. He has accidents during the night. Thank god so far not in the bed but he can’t seem to get to toilet on time and it happens on his way to bathroom. There goes another pair of underwear. I’m hoping there’s something that’s close to looking like…
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Dealing with lawyers
so I’m hiring a lawyer as I was told by my mothers social worker, Went on NELF, I got told a meeting to discuss elder care would be $400 and a durable power of attorney will be an additional $700. Is this normal? If it is are you aware of any grants that could cover this or cheaper options to get a DPA?
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Suffering from anxiety
I am only child in my late 50. Lost my mom to same disease 15 yrs ago. Now my dad . He has been in rehab/assisting living for year now. How do deal with sundown around 6pm he wants me to pick him and take him out. He curses and slams things around his room. This causes me anxiety and my blood pressure goes up. Sometimes I…
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So many posts remind me. . .
I see many posts and I think to myself we were there in the exact place 3 maybe four years ago and we are still not done. I feel sorry for those with years still left in trenches. My heart goes out to you because I was there as well and still am there. We are on the backside now but doesn't mean we don't have a long way to…
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Im new to this...Looking for guidance
Hello, I am new here and new to this world of dementia. My dad (lives with me) was diagnosed with ALZ last year. He is still independent for the most part and he is still driving (for now). I have started to take over paying his bills and keeping his banking straight. We do have the will and living will taken care of. What…
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Auto Response
I am a caregiver and I need some communication help. How do I respond to my client without making her feel like she doesn't remember. For example when she tells a story and she just told me I don't say anything about it. I usually ask the same questions or some what different to make her feel engaged. But what do I do if…