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Boundaries
Hello all, It's been a while since I've written. I've been busy taking care of loved ones. My mother passed away a few months ago, she had dementia and other health issues. My oldest sister also has dementia. She is in assisted living (as was my mother for the last two years of her life). I have been taking care of both of…
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Trouble getting mom to shower
My mom has dementia but it's still early onset. The two things I'm having problems with is getting her to change out of her PJs and getting her to shower. She said she doesn't get dirty bc all she does is sit in a chair. What can I do?
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AI and alzheimer's?
Excuse me if this has already been discussed, but I just read something that might show promise. https://scitechdaily.com/scientists-discover-hidden-cause-of-alzheimers-hiding-in-plain-sight/
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Constipation - Mom on hospice (and on soft diet) is constipated - suppository & food suggestions?
Hello All, Mom was discharged on Sunday from SNF to home for hospice care. She is on soft diet due to recent stroke. Her bowel movement since discharge indicate constipation and some impaction. In addition to some doses of Senna, Hospice nurse gave her a suppository last night which was productive (somewhat). But I can see…
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I’m so lost - mother is 90, English is a second language
I am so lost. My father recently passed away - somewhat unexpectedly - and, as an only child, am left to care for my 90 year old mother. I had not realized just how bad her short-term memory loss had gotten (dad never said) and I suspect she has onset dementia, She refuses to talk to a doctor or anyone about her mental…
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Mom is afraid to stay alone with Dad
Hi, my Dad has dementia. I think he's in the middle stages (gets angry, hallucinates, thinks the bank is stealing from him). Couple of days he had an episode and woke up at 3:30 a.m. Left the house and told my mom if she doesn't move, he will hit her. Thank God my aunt was there and went after him. He returned but was…
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New Dementia diagnosis
I was diagnosed with Dementia several months ago (I can’t remember exactly) and am having trouble dealing with the memory problems. I am on Memantine and Galantamine with good response…..well at least in the beginning. I feel like I am getting worse. I plan on taking to my doctor. I am wondering if I need to see a…
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Mom and Dad with Alzheimer’s
About a year ago, my mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Last week, so was my dad. They live independently together about 15 minutes from me, my husband and our 15 year old son. We knew something was wrong long before Dad’s diagnosis…but by the time we got his cooperation and finally got him to a doctor as a new patient,…
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Top of stairs gate
Hi Everyone! This is my first post. I live with my mom. She has moderate to severe AD. We will be living in a home with stairs. Any suggestions on keeping her upstairs, while we all sleep? I have read a 42” gate is appropriate. Any help would be greatly appreciated! Thank you.
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The Move to Memory Care is Here
So after over 4 weeks in Rehab for his knee and 5 weeks in a Geri Psych unit, my husband is finally being moved to Memory Care tomorrow. This facility wasn't my first, second or even third choice, but nobody wanted him! He went through multiple care assessments, and they all basically said "we don't think he's a good fit…
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Very Regrettable Appt.
Just to get it off my chest post….I know I know the calvary are not coming but darn darn darn… We went to the neurologist today after the 911 incident. I guess I was hoping for some back up but now I know there isn’t any. The Drs nurse wanted to know what I was doing to agitate him. I calmly explained, nothing…. And then…
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Anyone have any luck with washable adult diapers?
Hello, Few hours till 2025 here in the east coast, but Alzheimer's doesn't care. It goes on. We're spending a fortune on adult diapers as my LO pees constantly throughout the day given the special nutrition therapy she's on. It keeps her hydrated and well-nourished, and calm, but… it makes her pee constantly. Changing 5 or…
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how do you return to the MCF after an outing?
DW has been in MC for four weeks. I've contemplated taking her out of the facility for some activities, like going to a restaurant or a park or the zoo. But I can't figure out how I would get her to return willingly to the facility. Every time I visit, she talks about wanting to go home. Seeking advice and insights…
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Real ID or passport problems
Hi everyone and thank you in advance for any assistance. I live in Colorado but my mother is in a memory care facility in SC. As her disease progresses, it’s just too hard to have her so far away. I’m desperately trying to get her to CO to a new facility but I don’t have her original birth certificate or SS card and she…
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New here and looking for advice
Hi, I am the 58 year old son of a 89 y/o father who is entering mid-stage Alzheimer’s. I live in California, and my parents live in Southwest Florida. I had recently taken FMLA to fly out for 3 weeks to help my 85 year old Mom find an assisted living facility for him(she is unable to care for him any longer). We did find…
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Just dropping in
I just wanted to wish all the ladies a Happy Mother's Day. It's really hard to appreciate an occasion like this when you have your hands full, but try to take time to pat yourself on the back, and find the time to do something for yourself that will lessen the load, if even for only a little while. It's been a while since…
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Advice on phone calls
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10 Absolutes in Dementia Care
Shared by another member here - Thanks Chug! Here is one you can download or print:
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Is it necessary for Nurologist it ask same questions that upset patient everytime?
some of you know me as I always have lots of questions but for those of you who don’t know my situation it’s that my wife , I feel , is handling this nitemare much better then most that being said I know can change in a heartbeat . It’s 3 yrs and other then not driving or cooking anymore not doing too bad, her short memory…
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Awareness of condition
My DW lapsed into the lost memory phase, and had a particularly hard time. She still knew me but said she felt lost. This made me wonder if she had any awareness that something is wrong.
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Therapist or counsellor
Hi there, my wife’s mother was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s. She is understandably finding it emotionally tough. Could anyone recommend a therapist who specialises in this (for my wife)? Many thanks in advance
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help for a friend
I care three times a week for elderly woman who is mother to close friend. although early stages we shop shop shop i pick her up and drive her wherever she wants to go. we eat then shop she is allowed $60 a day and inevitably goes over forcing me to dig in my pockets which i do willing she is kind then mean and discusses…
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How often do you visit?
I made the mistake of visiting my mom (every other day) the first time she was placed in a nursing home. It just kept her from acclimating and each time I visited her she thought I was taking her home. It was doing her more harm than good. So, this time around (I took her out of the nursing home but had to put her back in…
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On the Upside
I just wanted to share a few positive wins in this land of the seemingly ever-down life. We are now 7 weeks post-MC move-in. Last weekend, in honor of Mother's Day, the care facility hosted a breakfast with mimosas and small fresh flowers for each Mom. It was a treat to share that with my DH since life with FTD is…
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Mom isn't talking to me
Hi, I'm new to this. Mom was diagnosed earlier this year with stage 3 Alzheimer's. I was caregiving for her. I had to stop because it was affecting my mental health. Mom is mad and hasn't talked to me for several months. I use to talk to her every morning. Has anyone else experienced this? How did you deal with this? Did…
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Introduction and Question
Hello! Grateful for this group. Here I go. Introduction, Question, and probably too much background for one post. My father passed away in December 2024 while my mom was in ICU. Since her discharge, I've transitioned her to Assisted Living in the town where I grew up/they continued to reside—location per her wishes. ( I've…
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Book that Gets It
Like we have time to reas? If you do, however, this novel by a writer whose husband died of Lewy Body Disease is good fictional treatment t of the rabbit hole we caregivers fall into. https://www.forewordreviews.com/reviews/counting-backwards/
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Downsizing from Assisted Living to Memory Care
My FIL is currently in a one-bedroom apartment in assisted living. Unfortunately, his dementia has progressed to the point where it is time for him to transition to memory care in the same facility. (In addition to general decline, he has become combative and aggressive.) His memory care room will be much smaller than his…
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I moved DW to memory care (part 2)
So, that's the background. All of our family and friends were supportive of placing DW in MC, even urging me to do so, reminding me that I had to take care of myself. The conundrum for me was, how was I going to get her in the door? How was I going to get her things to the MC facility? One suggestion was to say her doctor…
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Started with hospice care .
Lots of help and support . Also I kept a home care person who is working out well . Hoping to be able to have some time to be myself this week . We had a nice mother's day with the grandkids visiting . Of course it was hard for them but important they got to see their grandmother now and not later as this progresses. My…