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Challenges over Loss of Control
Good afternoon! I'm a brand-new poster and am an only child to my 79-year-old mom with VD. She's in memory care and has been in decline for years, with bigger deficits after stroke-type symptoms and multiple falls. Over the past year, she's become more paranoid and accusatory about my not visiting enough, the management of…
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Can't get official early onset diagnosis of dementia for my mom from PCP
For the past 2-3 years we've had a hard time getting an official diagnosis of Dementia for my 84 yr old mom. She appears to have all the early symptoms. She forgets the day of the week. Except for making toast she can't remember how to cook, she repeats herself all the time, she forgets my oldest sister is married, etc.…
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She Wants to Help
From what I read my wife is in Alzheimer's Stage 4. She is in good health and wants to help with everything. Problem is, she doesn't know how to do anything. Worst time is in the kitchen while I'm preparing dinner. She is everywhere, asking what she can do. It's driving me nuts. It would be so much easier if she would go…
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Expenses
Mom has early onset dementia. I am on her checking/savings accounts and have set most things up on auto-pay. There have been some monthly expenses that I have been paying directly and having her write me a check each month to pay me back. Is this a big no-no or red flag for Medicaid down the line? Or is it okay as long as…
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My watch over dad has ended and it feels so empty
My dad took his last breath in this life just yesterday. He was 89 years old. He and mom, who has dementia and is in memory care, were married 65 years. I moved both to an ALF about four months ago. I think my timing turned out to be just about right. I thought the world would look different without my dad in it, but it is…
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Just Vetting!
I just need to vent a little in order to keep my sanity! Our Holliday weekend was like a rollercoaster. My DW gets up as a friend, has breakfast and soon afterwards turns agitated and starts her daily trash talk to me. “shut up, come on, leave me alone, etc.” I then sit next to her and watch Hallmark movies for a couple of…
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Early Stage ALZ and hallucinations
Hi all! My Mom is 85 years old and has early stage ALZ. She is living in a senior living center (as assisted living) and loving it. She generally does quite well, just the bad memory and confusion from time to time. While she was living in her home (with her husband who has since passed away from lewy body), she was having…
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No conversation
Is this part of this awful disease? It’s been 3 days and very little if any conversations occur between us. DH , with VD, will most times respond to questions but to have a conversation is non existent! I’m beginning to feel I’m living alone. He wanted to work on a puzzle so I bought one, encourage him to work on it with…
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New and Need Advice
My Daddy was diagnosed with early onset dementia about 9 years ago. Things have rapidly declined in the last 6 months. He had an episode a month ago where he was missing for 15 hours. Ended up finding him in a field where his side by side had gotten stuck. He has that and a golf cart because he locked his keys in his truck…
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Service dog
My wife was diagnosed about 3 weeks ago with Mild Cognitive Impairment with Alzheimer's pathology. She's 64 years old and I'm 54. I don't remember who brought it up, but the idea of having a service dog was discussed. My wife has pretty much always had a dog. Right now we have a 13 year old American pit bull and a 2&1/2…
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I NEED HELP
hi, my husband of over 30 years is in mid stages and has taken to chatting on singles websites. I think it’s mostly sex talk. He is using his real (unique) name and is well known in his field. I’m not dealing with this well. He would never do this or somehow justify this behavior in younger years. I have done so many…
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Driving
New here - struggling with making decisions. Mom is 89. I've been noticing cognitive decline since 2022. Just got official diagnosis on Friday through an MMSE test. She scored 26/30 last year and 21/30 this year which seems like a fast decline. She is still driving and I am struggling on whether it's time to pull the keys…
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Sometimes I Forget
There are other stressors in our lives and when they add up and I get anxious and grouchy sometimes I forget that she really doesn't know that the question she just asked is the same as it was the 20 other times she asked. That just happened. I snapped at her and she got her feelings hurt. I tell myself I have to do…
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Update: out of Geri psych unit
After six weeks in the hospital (2 in a medical bed waiting for a Geri psych bed and 4 in the Geri psych unit), my DH was released back to his memory care on Friday. Zyprexa was the drug that finally helped him after they tried Seroquel and Risperidone. He still feels anxious sometimes due to his disorientation, but hasn’t…
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My sister doesn't get it.
My mom is mid-diagnosis, determining which type of dementia she has. My mother-in-law passed with Alzheimers about 10 years ago, so I know what I'm seeing. Mom lives 3/4 time with my sister and 1/4 time with me. My sister gets very frustrated (understandably) with my mom. She vents to me (fine) and I try to explain to her…
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Just Rambling... Again...
Is my DH the man I knew or someone new? Does this - the worst of his personality - come from who I know he's been the last 31 years but now just exacerbated because of his disease or is this just the disease? In any case it is impossible to continue with. If he were sweet and had the disposition of some that I hear of I…
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Activating springing DPOA
My mom's MCI is getting worse. How do I get my mom to the doctor to declare her incompacitated? What kind of fiblets can I use to coax my mom to see the doctor? I'm going to schedule a visit to her PCP and see if she can get a referral to see her neurologist to conduct a neuropsychological test to determine how impaired…
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I didn't plan for this:
I am a fairly good planner. I was a project manager, so I know planning for things that can go wrong is wise. I have not planned for the case where I die before my DW. We have wills, POAs, and family members assigned to take over health care and financial matters. However, I have not planned for someone to take over the…
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Update on the move and my LO
Hi Everyone, It has been just over a month and a half(about 6 weeks) since bringing my father for his visit. Which is his now home/long term stay. He is now telling me we need to look into flights for him to go back home. He truly thinks nothing is wrong with him. I feel like he is at the cusps of Memory Care and home. He…
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@PRC regarding Grief
(This has been reposted from the "Supporting Those who have Lost Someone" section for more exposure) Please include "@PRC" in your reply so responses go to PRC Well, here goes. I lost my DW in March after 5-6 years as her caretaker and I still feel completely lost and overwhelmed by grief. As many times as I read from…
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Another update about my brother
I went with my older brother this morning to see the neuropsychologist who tested him three weeks ago. She diagnosed him with mild cognitive impairment. She wants to see him again in a year to repeat the testing. If he has declined in that time, she will likely diagnose Alzheimer's. His short-term memory is so poor, I'm…
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Shower
I have tried everything I can think of to get my wife to take a shower, she is uncomfortable with me in there with her, she instantly forgets why she is in there, I've tried a nurses aid too any ideas 🤔
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Car ride
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Rehab facility won’t restrain LO for safety; legal?
LO in rehab after breaking hip. Won’t sleep in bed, sleeps I. Chair and fell out. Facility says they cannot “ safety belt” her in the chair or restrain her in any way. Just got a call back… she is unresponsive and going back to ER. I live 3 hours away. Why can’t she be secured for safety purposes? This seems like negligence
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Hospice
Joy has transferred from the hospital to hospice care…we are days not weeks to saying goodbye…. NeverFearTheDream #JoyInAlzheimer’s simplebender.com
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Dog…how should I tell DH
Our dog of 13 years is struggling and I believe it is time to let him go. DH loves this dog. Should I tell him that he fell asleep and didn’t wake up or tell him the dog is in rehab to help him walk? Has anyone had experience with this they can share? Thank you
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Mom in and out of delirium in hospital
I'm feeling very lost and confused on how best to help my mom, who lived independently and has recently had two falls that she doesn't remember. (Early in the morning, either disoriented or sleepwalking.) The latest resulted in her fracturing her pelvis. At first, we did our best to care for her at home with home health…
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Sedation for MRI?
DH had brain MRIs and is now totally against another. He said he won’t do “the coffin “ …But he may have NPH and neurosurgeon needs MRI of spine. The possibility of him getting back walking ability etc by draining some excess spinal fluid with a brain shunt is all new to me but that hope makes me think it’s worth trying to…
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Mom sang to me 🤗
Hello Alzconnect Family. Today's visit was nice, Momma sang to me. Sometimes visits are nice. I kissed prayed and hugged her. God bless. ✌️
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Broke my heart
My DH has done nothing for 2 years,besides watch TV and feed the birds and squirrels. Here in the last 2 weeks he has been cleaning out his man cave( which was disaster d/t I'm not to move or touch anything). He hoarded box's? Today I ask him what was going on with the cleaning? He said 'I'm aware of my mortality and I…