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It Begins
After my fathers inital diagnosis little while ago without a tear; today it hit me hard. A distant friend that my parents visited (with prior warning of the situation), spoke of how different my dad was generally and how in ~5yrs since last seeing both my parents the changes in my dad. Denial - for the longest time we've…
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Just need to talk to my friends (199)
September 1 is a good time to begin 199. Hope everyone is having a good Labor Day weekend. I am ready for cooler weather. This Oklahoma summer has not been good. We have had drought, grasshoppers and now army worms.
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Advice on in home behaviors
Does anyone have any suggestions on how to explain to my Dad that he needs to throw his depends away when they are wet vs just leaving them on the floor? Any advice on how my Mom or I can explain this to him and him not get furious at my Mom like he has been any time she asks him something? For example, he has on a depend,…
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Mom not wanting to eat
A lot has happened since my last post. In August, I took my mom to the ER because she was a little off. Found out she had a mild infarct and UTI. She was in rehab for 21 days. In September, my mom fell in the bathroom. I heard a thud, but didn’t know it was her until I heard her wail. Long story short, I took her to the…
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I just want more time.
4 years, 1 month, 1 day. From diagnosis to my husband is gone. I don't know how to process. I want him back. I am not even sure why I am writing this. I feel like I just joined this forum, trying to understand the why. And no, I don't understand. He fought hard. It doesn't make sense. I am sad. I am angry. I am numb. I am…
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depakote as a mood stabilizer instead of atypicals?
Dad's NP at MC calls me to check in from time to time. She has mentioned depakote as a mood stabilizer instead of atypicals due to the black box warnings on atypicals. Dad has been here for almost 4 months. Her concerns for him are related to agitation and irritation - sometimes with another resident and sometimes in…
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Wife has stocks in her name
my wife has some securities in her name, what can be done if you don’t want to sell just now, can you have transfer to my name or what to do??
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Agitation and paranoia
My DH is convinced that I am leaving him for another man. I don’t know where this came from. He is very confused and hallucinating all the time. Now I am also trying to solve non-existent issues that he has imagined. He sees and talks to people in our house all the time. I know we are not supposed to argue or try to use…
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Found out NJ Medicaid requirements
what I was told , everyone different based on funds, but say you own home together when out on Medicaid you change deed to your name saves house all legal can only change deed to a spouse. If say you have $100,000 it’s 50/50 split. You must spend 50 on whatever , pay bills buy car etc, the other 50 is yours to keep.
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Vascular dementia
We are new to vascular dementia. My husband was just diagnosed a month ago, as well as frontal lobe syndrome,, , my father has dementia, but I’m finding this vascular dementia different. My husband pushed me yesterday. I’m wondering if there are any medications to help with his mood swings any input would be helpful thank…
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Short-term rehab facility vs. home care ?
DH is in the hospital and they want to release him to Short term sub-acute rehab facility. He was in for a fall but he is not seriously hurt - except for the agitation/aggression/anxiety and some balance issues. The hospital won't let him out of bed at all. He begs to come home. The list of facilities available changed…
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New here. DW is having issues.
Hi everyone. I joined some time ago but haven't looked around much or posted at all. I'm posting now because my DW had an incident a couple weeks ago, a story you've no doubt heard before but is new to me. She was diagnosed with ES about 18 months ago, along with Parkinson's. Our silver anniversary is this Wednesday, 10/2.…
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New here - Contemplating my future while grappling with current issues
I am glad that I found this place. I have been reading some discussions, and I don't feel as alone anymore. I apologize for the length in advance. I feel like I just need to vent... My backstory - I have been married 30 years. I am 53, husband is 54. We still live together, but have been estranged for about 8 years. We…
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Disability benefits
Hello, I’m new here. My husband who is 48 years old was recently diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s. We filed for disability back in March and it still hasn’t been decided on. We are struggling as he is totally unable to work. I guess my question here is has anyone been this route? I know because of his diagnosis his…
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Mild Cognitive Impairment
Hi, my name is Barb (61 yo), and I am trying to find out more about Early onset Alzheimer’s. I completed Neuropsych testing two years ago and was diagnosed with Mild Cognitive Impairment. I feel like I am struggling more so I had the testing redone. I have not heard the results yet, but I know my scores went down. I had a…
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Need guidance/ help
My mom's dementia has gotten worse and she's now constantly hearing voices of someone hurting me or me screaming for help. I had taken her to a neurologist a while ago and at that time she refused to take meds (she wasn't experiencing hallucinations at the time). It was hard to get an appointment with the neurologist again…
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Just a story
Just telling the story ... I know it's not uncommon, but also know that none of mom's family or friends want to hear this stuff. So telling people who understand. A staff member in my mom's room commented on a piece of artwork on her wall. My dad gave it to her as a gift decades ago, and she has always especially liked it.…
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Routine schedule
My SO is 45 with EOA. We had an update visit yesterday with his neurologist. They said he is in the moderate transitioning to severe stage. She also said he can be in this state for a few years still as he is still able to bathe and eat and walk on his own. (Which calmed my heart). With all that being said I got a new job…
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Finding it difficult making decisions for my DH
The knee injections are no longer giving relief for my DH. It tires him to walk short distances. We have an appointment for consultation that’s moved out again to December. I know knee surgery is not an easy one. This week he had oral surgery for extractions of 2 wisdom teeth, and one tooth. Difficult for him to follow…
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Might be losing my husband’s placement
my husband’s been in Geri-psych for about a week after his latest aggressive incident.The nurse at his memory care came to visit him today and told the social worker they may not take him back. I can’t really blame the memory care. The social worker told me he would be very challenging to place because he’s had 7…
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Today it hit me !!!
I’m reading the other day what everyone is doing in my over 55 community, trips , clubs , shows etc. and it hit me my poor wife who worked over 30 yrs with own business raised two great girls was Cheated out of a retirement life she deserved . She’s happy in the things we do everyday, I make sure I take her out everyday…
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DH wants to know diagnosis
my DH keeps asking about his diagnosis and when given facts he denies situation and argues about it. I’ve tried changing the subject but he insists on talking about it. The last two Sat nights started the discussion got annoyed and agitated and went to bed. What am I suppose to say to answer this constant question. He says…
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Conversation with phone
my DW was diagnosed with EOAD about a year ago. She has always been a talker and she still talks a lot except now she doesn’t make much sense even to me. I the past I was Able to fill in the parts of the conversation and was able to figure out what she was saying. Today a new thing happened. My DW has followed a lady on…
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Traditional Medicare assistance with at home long term care
Finally a major candidate is talking about long term care being covered by Medicare for people other than those covered only by Medicaid. I heard Harris talking about it on The View earlier today and now it’s being talked about on several news broadcasts. If only……
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Resources for spouse?
Are there any support groups specifically for spouses of Alz patients? The spouse dynamic is VERY different from the child dynamic. I’m really struggling with the intimacy aspect and desperately need to talk with people who understand.
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Another step down
Since his stay in the ER, my DH has continued to deteriorate. Before, he could speak a little and was able to recognize me and say he loved me. Now, he is not speaking, is eating very little, and sleeping pretty much all of the time. As I live 3 hours distant from the MC, it is devastating to make the trip and not have any…
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First Bout of Pneumonia
A week ago, Monday, had the ambulance take DW to the hospital with what turned out to be right lobe pneumonia. 2 1/2 days in and got her right back home. Week later, she's made almost a complete recovery. Pleased with the nursing she received; CNAs needed prodding though on skills for 1 on 1 feedings, fall risk precautions…
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Father packing to fly back home
Hello all, It’s been a minute. My father has been here about 3 months and we are now at a point where fiblets don’t work. He is now demanding to go home and even if I say we are figuring it out or I can’t because of work he is going to get his own flight to go home. (I am POA I have all his ids and credit cards) wifi is…
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Am I being written out of DH history?
DH is in ES stage ALZ, but most likely moving into MS. Married 65 years. This week DH has told two stories from our joint history where he has written me out of the story for the most part. What he did was to take credit for things that I had done. I don't care so much about that as I am wondering if this is a "thing" that…
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Well here we are…