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Heading into the Holidays Alone
The coming holidays will be my first without my mother or Roger. It seems like there is a lot out there about navigating the holidays around family and friends, but no real advice for those of us who have neither. The usual advice about finding a community dinner to attend or volunteer at just doesn't ring true for me. And…
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My Mom Died November 1st
Hi everybody, I have been reading these posts for years. My mom had Alzheimer’s for about 15 years. 3 years ago, my father died and I took over the caregiving for my mom. She was bedridden for those 3 years. But she was the sweetest little lady. She had forgotten who I was, but she gave me kisses everyday. She died on…
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When the marriage was not good.
I am embarrassed about my title, but it is my truth and I have to find out if I am alone in my situation. In my family it has always been that when we get old, the veil of self-delusion about our lives lifts, and we are faced with our truths. My husband of 38 years has been the absolute love of my life, I have remained IN…
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Sundowners
I've been caring for my wife who is suffering from Alzheimer's. She is in the middle stages and it is progressing. Since the time change her sundowners is getting worst every night She does not know I'm her husband Demands I Leave the house, its her house and not mine. I currently only have the help from her sister but it…
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I wrote this essay to help others after losing my father to a long battle with Alzheimer's disease.
After losing my father to a long battle with Alzheimer's, I wrote this essay to give a glimpse into this horrific disease, draw attention to the red flags (there are many people who, at this very moment, have a family member with dementia yet still do not realize it), and especially to help people navigate through the…
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Yin and Yang
How can i be so happy and sad at the same time. It’s our birthday’s mine is the 8th DH 9th we have always celebrated together. It’s always been such a fun time of family and friends parties and dinners. Now it’s too uncomfortable to go out to dinner DH needs to be fed and food falls either on the floor or down his shirt,…
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Jason Aldean song “Help You Remember”
He is raising money for Alzheimer’s. He had a family member with dementia. Beautiful song. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fKEVGVOYG84
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in stage 8 after a fall
My wonderful husband passed last Thursday near midnight. He had been experiencing some episodes of lashing out toward the staff of his memory care home (utterly unlike any behaviors before) and I had met with executive staff who thought because he'd had a week with out of town visitors, being taken to golf range, etc. he…
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Home for the Holidays
Hi to all, I ran across this video while checking to see if any new ones popped up on my YouTube channel. I found it to be quite helpful and relevant for this time of year. The title is “Caregiving and the Holidays: From Stress to Success” through the Wellmed Charitable Foundation. (If the link below doesn’t open for you,…
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Move to an apt. as a second home
Does anyone have experience with splitting time between two places? My dh is at his worst when it’s just the two of us home alone; he struggles with people and place recognition, including not knowing me probably 75% of the time. We live in a rural area on a lake and love our home, but given how difficult it’s becoming to…
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‘Me Time’ Confusion
I just need to talk about my confused reaction to ‘me time’. With the generosity of the Government I now have subsidised help every fortnight in the house, floors, bathroom, changing sheets on the bed etc; and garden maintenance mowing the lawn. This is a great relief. I also have a Carer that comes weekly for two hours…
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No short term memory
I’m so worried. My DH was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s 4 years ago. It has been a gradual decline until now. He has no short term memory. Within minutes or seconds he is asking the same questions or cannot understand a situation. Yet he looks and acts perfectly normal around others. From your experience where do we go from…
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Urge to pee but no pee
Been dealing with toileting issues at night the last couple months with the last few weeks increasing in frequency but this is a new one. MIL has been up and down multiple times during the night feeling like she has to pee but is not able to pee. She had two urine tests last week. First was inconclusive. Second was done…
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From NPR: Dementia Care without Locked Wards
https://www.npr.org/sections/shots-health-news/2025/11/17/nx-s1-5600877/dementia-alzheimers-care-housing-senior-living-inclusion-segregation
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Caregiving Rookie
We don't have an "official" diagnosis yet, but after two years of doctor visits, medical tests, and eventually specialists, it appears likely that my DH is in the early stages of Vascular Dementia. I feel blessed that he currently acknowledges that something is wrong, but I can see his acceptance beginning to wane as the…
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Travel
My DH is about 5 years into it now, he was a very active, intelligent man. Now he mostly sleeps and watches TV. We have always traveled to Arizona from Mn. to avoid the harsh winters. We did share the driving but now of course, I do all of it. But Im worried how he will do on 4-5 days of travel and motels. I've read that…
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My DW's pain levels
Hi Y'all, My DW of 57 years was diagnosed two and a half years ago. She is currently between levels 3 and 4, in my estimation. Our GP prescribed Memantine 10 MG twice a day and Donepezil 10 MG once a day at her diagnosis. I don't know if or how much that helps her. I asked our GP about 6 months ago if he felt they were…
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Changes in vision - info to help communicate
When someone with dementia seems confused, startled, or disconnected during a conversation, it may be because they literally cannot see you. As dementia progresses, peripheral vision narrows and the visual field becomes limited. This means a person with dementia often only sees what is directly in front of them, and they…
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endgame
How and how often would one tell one's spouse who feels awful all the time and who has no short term memory that the likelihood of her ever feeling better is probably nil, and that she is likely facing years of decline?
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Where are we at here?
I have these questions, and no one can just give me a straight answer. My mom (66years old) was diagnosed with ALZ, in 2022. I guess we can call it EO because she was 63 years old at the time of diagnosis. She has type 1 Diabetes and last month she was put into hospice at home. She was hospitalized Oct 17 for her blood…
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The Cavalry Is Not Coming
Reposting for the new platform. I have not posted here for quite a while, and I want to let you know that I am still here. I hope you all are doing well, and I also have a thought process to share with you. October 1, 2022 will mark seven years since my wife’s dementia became obvious, and that I knew for certain that this…
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New to Alzheimer's
Hello all thank you for providing a network of caregivers to help guide others through this horrible disease. My grandfather was officially diagnosed over a year ago with Alzheimer's. I am his MPOA and am new to all of this. I am just wondering if anyone has any advice on the following. He has UHC Medicare Advantage and I…
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Can I Contact My DH’s Doctor Directly?
My husband has his own PCP and this doctor is very strict out privacy rules. In the past he has said I need to go through my DH if I want to send messages to him. What do I need to do to have the authority to speak with the doctor on my husband’s behalf? Is this when the DPOA comes in to play? Should I provide a copy to…
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Where are we at here?
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Scared of the clarity
My bf who is 46yo (eoa/ftd) stage 7, on hospice. No end of life care (morphine, haloperidol, the usual stuff). The last few weeks we have noticed a big decline. He stopped walking a little over 2 weeks ago, food intake has been baby food, ensure and pureed food as well. Well today his best friend came, who was just here…
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Atrophy of hands
My DH is in the middle stages of Alzheimer’s and has been developing atrophy of the hands making it hard to button shirts, open jars or do a lot of things requiring finger dexterity. He is going to PT but is told each visit that he needs to do a set of exercises to 30 minutes to 1 hour a day. I have to keep reminding him…
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Hoping I’m doing the best for my dad.
Hello all. I’m a new member here. I’ve been caring for my dad for nearly 15 years now. He went from being my rock to depending on me for everything. I am 1 of 6 living children that my dad has. My mother passed 22 years ago then my eldest brother a year after her. I am the baby of the girls. I have 3 older sisters and 2…
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keep or cancel phone?
Hello All-I have a question that has been on my mind for quite some time. My husband, who has dementia and is living in a boarding care facility has not used or needed his cellphone for many months now. I kept it as a just in case for the authentication code thingy but now everything is tied to my cellphone instead. I pay…
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Weighted blanket
Hi. My father has been restless at night and waking up. I tried a weighted blanket last night and it seems to help a little. He did wake up once but wasn't as agitated as he usually is. It seemed easier to get him back to bed. Does anyone find this helps? It's been a couple of months of disruptive sleeping. I am trying…
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New here
Hello I'm new here. My mom has Alzheimer's and is stage 5 with a little 6. I had to move her in with me a few months ago as living independently became too difficult. I'm struggling with my sense of loss of my independence having to be caregiver for her. I plan to check out a nearby nursing facility that has an all female…