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Just need to talk to my friends (214)
Happy 2026 to all our front porch friends. Hopefully this new year will be a better year for each of us and for our Country. Everyone is probably sound asleep right now and I will be in a few minutes, too. Stormy needed to go outside for a minute and I just thought I would get 214 started. See you later.
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New to this and in need of guidance
Hi. Just signed up. My first time on here. Mom was just diagnosed with Alzheimers. I am not sure what my steps are to get her everything she needs and where I can obtain from a financial point and medical care (medicaid??, walker, assistance) She lives alone and is in early to mid stage. Any suggestions? We live in NY. Are…
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My Dad Died
After 6 months in nursing home and a week in the hospital my Dad died last Thursday. So I guess my caregiver journey is over with him. I feel very confused. I haven't cried nearly as much as I thought I would. I thought I would fall apart. But I have been fine so far. Am I just waiting for a collapse around the corner?
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It'd how to go ir alone?
I was diagnosed year ago this month. Ill be 60 and seems been losing focus sometimes uhm frustrated sometimes just saying things probably shouldn't. I do forget somethings like where i delivered a couple of days ago . Like names of city or towns . I know there is sites to turn to but .Just looking for conversation about…
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I want quiet, he wants to talk
My DH, probably into early stage 5 of Alz. He is still able to care for himself and do small chores around the house. He is aware he has Alz, but rarely talks about it. Often tells me he just wants to be "normal". Although he did acknowledge this week that he couldn't handle the AM Express payment online any more and that…
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Moving a parent to another state to another facility
I am seriously considering moving my parent who is midstage from a memory care facility she has spent 1 year at to a facility by me in another state. I am honestly a little intimidated to do this but I feel like this is the right decision for her care. I am her power of attorney so I can make this decision. Does any one…
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Dementia needs
My DH was diagnosed 9 yrs ago with early onset dementia and just recently with Parkinson. I've made the following purchases which have made both our lives better. A small,lightweight wheelchair from Amazon, adult bibs, washable mattress pads, a bedrail, satin sheets and silk pajamas to help him slide in and out of bed. I…
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Tips for taking care mom has alzheimer
Hello, my name is Cindy. I and my sister live with my mom who is 84 years old and has alzheimer over 14 years now. Her behavior is changing every moment especially at night time. She was happy, and talking and certainly turned strange to us like saying we steal her stuff. She made up stories that never happened. We have to…
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First appointment - what should I ask?
Looking back on what you now know, what should I - the caretaker - ask the neurologist at the first appointment? What do you wish you had asked? My wife is 61 with a father and grandmother who had AD. She had a blood test last week with a positive for tau (whatever?) and a ct scan that was “not terrible” (upon brief review…
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Help, non stop sundowning
Hello, I’m new here. I’m too young to be dealing with this.. Mom and I are the last live members of our family and she’s had dementia (clearly to me) for the last 15 years. 5 years ago I took her home with me because I couldn’t find a place she was not being abused. She’s 99% gone. She doesn’t know who I am but she is…
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Vascular dementia medication
Hi, Please share any medication that you have found that helps with vascular dementia. My mom is on Donezapil but she is have negative side effects. Thanks so much!
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Mom won’t see a doctor but definitely has alcohol-related dementia.
Mom is 76 and has been exhibiting signs for about 20 years if I really look back at the first changes in her habits. She’s just moved into an Independent Living facility that also has AL and MC. She’s still drinking and getting really confused all the time. The other day she called me for help with the Roku. I asked her…
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Refusing to shower or change clothes?
My mother with dementia is in assisted living and since last weekend, she has refused to shower (the caregivers assist her) or change clothes. She hasn’t showered in a week and has been wearing and sleeping in the same clothes for 5 days. I’m mortified. They keep trying and I even tried to talk her into it on the phone…
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Dramatic rapid decline after illness
is it common for people with dementia to have a dramatic decline after an illness? My parent got a mild case of pneumonia (super bad for 1.5 days but recovered quickly) and is on antibiotics for this infection. She was already having an increase in symptoms prior to the illness which happened one week ago. But now her…
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talking to people who aren't there
My wife has for a long time had delusions and some hallucinations (about 3 years) but she has recently started to talk to people that are not there. She is I think early stage 7, but in the DBAT it has that in the section of the final weeks. I know every case is different but for those that have experienced this what has…
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Memory Care and Home Visits
Is it always the case that someone in a Memory Care environment should not visit their old home for fear of triggering confusion or a desire to stay there again? Or are there examples where it can be a positive temporary experience? (In our case no one else is currently living in that home. It is located about 20 minutes…
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Not Showering
My wife is in midstage Alzheimer’s, living at home with me as her only caregiver. She manages all her ADLs except showering. I remind her in the morning to shower, and most days she skips it. I know because either I don’t hear the shower running, or if she does turn it on I know she doesn’t get in because her towels are…
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Memory care / Medicaid / quality of care in New Jersey VS New York
Hello everyone, I’m in the process of attempting to move my dad who is in the early to mid stages of Alzheimer’s from a retirement community in Arizona to the east coast where i am. There’s no other family around and we both want to be closer to each other. This process is beyond overwhelming. I began my search a few…
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Hallucinations
Hi everyone!! Hope you are all well, especially my fellow snowed-ins. My mama is most likely in stage 6 of her Alzheimer’s, and she just mentioned to me that she sees beetles in our window. I tried to have her point where she was seeing them and eventually realized that she was seeing them, but they are not there. I know…
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97.5 year old with Dementia/AZ
Hello, new to the group. My father's dementia started after a brain bleed at age 95. His other health is great for someone his age. He can walk, talk, feed himself and use bathroom on his own. Unfortunately, he experiences sun downers or agitation bordering on violent behavior almost every other day. He is still at home…
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Long Story
Hi all, I am new to the online support group. My husband has both vascular and FTD. I was wondering if any other spouses abruptly left their family home during an illness that presented as psychiatric, but was later diagnosed with dementia after many unfortunate events, say 2 years. We finally had to place my husband in a…
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unsure of what and where to start for help with my dad
I'm caring for my father who has alz. I moved in about a year ago so he could stay home like my mom and dad had said they wanted to do . My mom passed 5 years ago. And my oldest sister passed away about 2 Yrs ago, so now I'm the one to care for my father with no help. But now he can't sleep and is getting mad because his…
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Trying to keep him at home
My DH is late stage 6 and is on hospice. I have a wonderful caregiver who comes to our home during the weekdays. Lately though he’s unsteady on his feet. Very difficult for me to get him out of bed and walk him to the bathroom for me to change him, give him his bath. We had a hospital bed delivered this week. My caregiver…
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Suggestions please
My DH was diagnosed a few months ago with younger onset and we're both struggling with how to process it and move forward. Even though we've been pushing for the diagnosis for several years it's still turned our world upside down. We're in our 40's with kids and I'm just not sure how to navigate or handle everything or…
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Aromatherapy(1)
Has any one tried aromatherapy for dementia in their LO? If so, which oils help? I hear music and aromatherapy help. May be it will help him stay awake. DH sleeps at least 3 hours in the afternoon, though he goes for a one mile daily morning walk by himself. We take one mile evening walk together. I told him he should keep…
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Lonely but longing to be alone…
Hello- New to posting, though I have looked in on others for several years. My DH (age 70) has Alzheimer’s and Vascular Dementia, heading into moderate stage although not yet problems with ADLs. We have known this was coming (through testing) for around 10 years. Slow progression, so I feel fortunate for that. SO many of…
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Entering fast stage 7
I don't know if it's harder on me or my wife. She still knows who I'm but doesn't know what day of the week it is. Watching stage 7 with (VD) is very hard on me to have to watch her going thru losing control of her bodily functions. One day see is her old self and the next day something else. I see her every day for an…
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Heartbroken but comforted DH No Longer Suffering
It’s been a rough road for a while. My DH ended up in hospital before being transferred to palliative. He died peacefully 7 days later. We will miss him being physically here; however, we are at peace knowing he is no longer suffering. I thank this group for being so authentic and raw in questions and answers. I’ve gone…
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Sleeping almost all the time now
My DH is declining. He was probably only awake 2-3 hours yesterday. Hospice has brought a hospital bed here because many days I can’t walk him to the bedroom. Yesterday it took me and the caregiver just to get him from the hospital bed to the chair. What can I expect from here? He still eats but not as much. For those of…
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how do you talk to an elderlaw attorney?
I'm in the beginning stages of talking to a (not officially certified) elderlaw attorney. We already have wills, health care proxies, etc., but I wanted another pair of eyes to see whether we missed something. Here's my problem. DW has anosognosia and gets angry at any suggestion that she has a problem. How can I discuss…