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Does anyone understand the Health Care documents in NJ?
I am having trouble wrapping my head around what I need for mom as far as health care proxies. I have tried talking to a Elder Care Attorney, two in fact. One blew me off completely, and other wanted me to sign an $8,000 contract before further discussion. So I have become somewhat disenchanted with that route. Most of the…
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A Phone for Grandpa
Hello everyone, my grandfather was diagnosed with early onset dementia about a year ago now, he was on some medication that was helping for a while but its not helping as much anymore. He has recently forgotten how to use the landline he's had in his home for the past 10-15 years. My dad and I have been struggling to find…
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Another twist in accusations
Following up my initial post ..see below Mother accusing me of stealing in her bank account ( ongoing for 8 months) , using her phone number to make long distance calls etc. she say’s she has proof but there is none. My younger sister told her it was impossible and was kicked out.. She then told the older sister she wanted…
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NPH / Normal Pressure Hydrocephalus
I've searched the boards and don't see a clear cut answer on this one. Does anyone have a LO diagnosed with ALZ and later on, NPH? My dad is 72, started developing ALZ symptoms about 5 years ago. Currently stage 6. This week, a CAT scan revealed significant fluid on his brain (NPH). Characterized by odd gait (check), lose…
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Pigs do indeed fly
Imagine my complete and utter surprise when I found out my brother went to go visit Peggy on Saturday! He hasn't seen her since June, 2021. Staff at Peggy's memory care didn't even realize we have a brother - no one has met him, until yesterday. I'm always complaining about that guy because he's been MIA for so long. I'm…
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Care go
My mom has dementia and seems to be getting worse one day she is fine the next she is not is that normal behavior
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How to Talk about Shoes
Hello! My parents are in assisted living, Dad with Alzheimer's and Mom with mild dementia. My dad has foot problems due to arthritis, high arches, and sport injuries, so he has custom made insoles with cut-outs to prevent ulcers on the balls of his feet. Due to the high arches, we are limited on shoe styles (slip-ons don't…
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Unrealistic travel plans
My 87 yo LO with stage 5 mixed Alz/vascular dementia and mobility issues has unrealistic travel plans. He had trouble today finding his way around his retirement community and was confused about meeting his 5 year companion for dinner. Which he does every Sunday afternoon. Mobility-wise, he is basically 100% reliant on his…
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Should I stay away from her
Mother is showing signs of dementia , has not been diagnosed yet , she would refuse . 8 months ago she started accusing me of stealing from her bank account ( I had POA and was paying her bills ) she did not understand the statements and believe her withdrawals where done by me, my sister and I explained to her it was not…
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Chewing/sucking on bedding
Lately we have found my dad surrounded by wet sheets. They are not urine. Last night when I arrived, I found him in bed, with the sheet in his mouth. This is new behavior.
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Mother refusing to go to respite care
Moving my mother into my house was, in retrospect, a terrible decision. Now she won't leave. We've crafted a story that my daughter, who lives across the country, needs my help and I need to go, so she is going to a "hotel" while I am gone. My mother thinks she can stay by herself in my house. I explained that I can't…
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Alzheimer's and Diabetes
Hello, My mother has Alzheimer's and Diabetes. She has done very well in controlling her blood sugar with the help of an insulin pump. Lately though she has started taking the sensor off of her body that controls the flow of insulin. She has done this four times in the last week. Is there any advice on a way to keep it on…
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BINGO
My eldest and I were voicing some frustration at the platitudes we have been told about self care. This kid made a Bingo card as a way to help us smile and it was too funny not to share. In all seriousness please do whatever you need to to take care of yourself, including laugh.
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legal documents
my mom was recently diagnosed with alz. My sister and I are wondering what legal documents we need to make sure that as things progress we will be able to make decisions for her? Please leave any helpful information you have
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This Resonated with Me
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We all deserve at least one laugh a day
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack. "Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $10000 loan to take a holiday." Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's OK, he knows…
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My Mum and Dad
Hi, my mum was diagnosed with Alzheimers last year although we have known for a while things werent right to be honest. Excuse this strange question but here goes.. My mum and Dad havent been really close for years. My Dad didnt like my mums family at all. All my grandparents have now passed away and my mum and dad always…
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We're back
(*posted in Spouse & Partner forum also) Dear Forum Mates, I have been away (abruptly) for a few months and thought about you all EVERY DAY, several times a day. You have truly been missed. We (DH and me) are as well as can be expected, but had some serious stuff thrown our way and I just couldn't keep up with also reading…
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My Child Helps Pay My Bills. Do I Need to Tell Medicaid? (From elder law answers)
I'm applying to Medicaid. I am over the income limit but have household expenses that exceed my income. My daughter also contributes so that I can make ends meet. Does Medicaid consider the money my daughter provides for support additional income? Or, does Medicaid view the money from others as a demonstration of need? I'm…
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Do people living with Alzheimer’s/dementia get sad?
Today was a very tough day for my LO. She went to the doctor and was more disoriented than usual - the “cognitive reserve” was down. Even after a meal out, which usually cheers her, she looked like she might cry. Then incontinence didn’t help, and she won’t wear anything like depends. She looked so humiliated and dejected.…
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Another use for shaving cream
I was cleaning up after DH, getting him ready for bed, and could not get the urine smell off of his hands. His skin just seemed to absorb it. After a lot of soaping, the odor was still there. so i grabbed the shaving cream and applied it to his skin. WOW, instant odor removal. Just wanted to pass it along.
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Bank shut down due to POA?
Our experience with moms bank account was difficult. My brother, her son, had POA (I was secondary). When the funeral home alerted social security that she was deceased, that alerted her bank also. My brother and I were waiting for a few things to clear so we could shut it down. The bank suddenly locked the account down…
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Back from respite care
My s.o. put the plan together so quickly I could barely believe it. But he did. I called everyone in my small, but very excellent team (Peggy's friends M and D, and my two outside caregivers), and Peggy's memory care facility, so everyone knew I'd be away for essentially three days. It was Monday afternoon through this…
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Retaliation in Nursing Homes: Report Sent by Michael Ellenbogen
Yesterday (June 15th) was World Elder Abuse Awareness Day. Here is a link to the report and the press release for it. https://nursinghome411.org/alert-retaliation/
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Any advice for preserving relationship with grandchild?
My mom (83) and dad (85) have always been very involved in my son's life. I am their only child, he is their only grandchild. Mom has ML and dad has other health issues. They moved to AL about 6 months ago. Mom cannot retain any new information and asks the same questions over and over again. We have always been a small,…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 6/15/23
GOD’S LOVE AND CARE BIBLE REFLECTION Romans 8:31-32 (GNT) “…If God is for us, who can be against us? Certainly not God, who did not even keep back his own Son, but offered him for us all! He gave us his Son—will he not also freely give us all things?” What comfort do you find in the above verse? MEDITATION God was always…
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Dealing with paranoid delusions?
It's been several years since I've been on this forum (my dad who had Alz passed away in 2018), but now I'm back again since my brother-in-laws mother has dementia and it's been extremely difficult to handle. My sister and her husband have been working on getting her meds on track, but until then we need some advice on her…
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My 84 yr old mother
Hi. I'm new here and this is my first post. My 84 yr old mother was always abusive and is a narcissist, and as I'm sure you can imagine, Alz has magnified that tremendously. Her memory loss has really created a challenge because she does know that she has Alz, and has also been aware for many years now, about 20, that her…
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Habladores en Espanol/Spanish Speakers
Hay casi nadie que esta escribiendo en Espanol en Alzconnected recentemente. No habian muchas personas antes pero ahora hay menos. Hay todavia un represente de la Associacion de Alzheimer's quien puede responder preguntas en espanol? Se puede hacer algo reanimar este grupo en Alzconnected? There is almost no one writing in…
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My brother is miss mismanaging my mothers finances
I'm afraid my brother is mismanaging my mother's finances, which could lead to bankruptcy. He got a home equity line of credit in her name against her house. I thought this would be used for unexpected expenses, but my brother started using it to buy solar equipment. He believes that society will collapse and that we need…