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Anger is grief speaking up
As someone walking through dementia and Alzheimer's with my own family, I keep thinking about a line I recently heard: "Anger is grief speaking up." If we want something to change in the next 20 years, we have to speak up…now. Alzheimer's is often approached as, "See a neurologist and wait." But Alzheimer's is not just a…
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Dentist
Hi My husband has Alzheimers and I'm looking for a dentist that is patient and kind when handling someone with Alzheimers. I live in the Lincoln RI area. Any referrals would be much appreciated. Darlene
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Medicare GUIDE Program & local help
In addition to the information on the GUIDE Program I posted about a month ago, I got a call yesterday that we are eligible for 19 four hour increments of respite care per year, from July 1 to June 30. This means up until this June 30th, I can use all 19 segments. The next step is an in-home assessment. After that the…
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PTau 217
Hi everyone… my name is Jason and I am new to this group. Just a little background… My mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s a few years ago. So partially due to that fact, coupled with the feeling that I am struggling with recently learned tasks and names, I decided to have a pTau 217 blood test done. I got the results…
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Top three
Just wondering what phrase ( besides I love you) you all use the most with your LO with dementia. Here’s my top 3: You hungry? What are you breaking? ( when I hear something crash in another room) Watch your head! (as she walks with her eyes half closed and head down) Hey, it’s Friday night
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Adjusting to MC
My mom has been in a MC facility going on 7 weeks now. She has been diagnosed with vascular dementia and possibly mixed. We see a Neurologist in June to find out what other type. On top of that she has a history of bipolar/ depression with some schizophrenia. She does have delusions and hallucinations which she is on…
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Don't sweat the small stuff
I read the book several years ago and realize today that I need to apply it to the world I find myself and my LO in. As an example, this means not getting stressed, upset over a toilet not being flushed, or no help preparing meals. The bigger focus should be on keeping my LO safe, secure and also keep myself rested and…
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Missing Joe
Good evening all, I just want to put some timeline out there. I know my situation is unlike those of many who have been married all their adult lives. Joe and I were married about 9.5 years, and together 13. He was in memory care for about a third of our marriage. They put Joe on hospice at the end of February. His dad…
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Mom (92) mod/sev dementia … suggestions PLEASE
hello … mom (92) has lived with us for 10years but there’s been a gradual decline up until maybe the last year or so … it has gotten worse. i work out of the home so i am pretty much available to her for whatever she needs & at this point i am providing (or assisting/reminding) everything. my husband /my self … our 3boys…
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Grandmother living with dementia REFUSES TO BATHE/SHOWER
I am a 33 yr old granddaughter, taking care of my 86 yr old grandmother living with dementia. I’ve been living with her for the past almost three years providing care to her and my uncle. Recently she has refused to shower. It's been getting harder and harder to convince her, and she instantly switches to anger and puts…
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LOST!
I am new to both this site and becoming a caregiver. My most precious wife of 58 years was diagnosed with either high mild or moderate dementia about a year ago. After reading all the information I could, it seems to me that her symptoms fall mostly into the FTD type. Of course, we all know that our ability to diagnose via…
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Moving wife to memory care
I'll be moving my stage 4 or 5 dementia wife to memory care soon. Any advice on moving her would be appreciated. Should I try to explain to her that she is moving ahead of time? Should I take her there and wait until she is asleep before going home? Should I bring all of the stuffed animals she likes the most all at once…
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Delusions stop in MC?
We moved my mother to an MC facility approximately four weeks ago. From the chart she is in stage five of Alzheimer’s. One of the main reasons we finally made this decision was because she was having delusions and fixations. Every night for weeks leading up to the change she believed she was having a baby and if we didn’t…
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Hello
I’m new. My mom has dementia. She’s not reliable enough to be on her own, but not quite ready for assisted living. My dad, who has been her grounding force, is about ready to go into long term care for physical debility after fracturing a hip. They, of course, live out of town. They are both resistant to moving to where I…
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Formula1 and fighting dementia
Just an interesting article. https://www.latimes.com/sports/story/2026-05-18/how-formula-one-team-pit-stop-tactics-dementia-battle?utm_source=firefox-newtab-en-us
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Burn out
I am only in my second year of dementia with my 96 year old mother. The 24/7 has gotten to me. Usually I am very patient with her but am losing it. Medicare pays spit, making home health aids very expensive. I joined a support group but I'm not finding them that helpful as I don't think any of the ladies live with the…
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Private Pay One on One in addition at Memory Care Facility
Hello, My 86 year old mom had a stroke and massive heart attack almost 7 years ago. She survived, but now has vascular dementia and Alzheimer's (Alzheimer's started prior to stroke). She was at a memory care facility that was horrible. We moved her to this new place in February and love it. The staff is very caring and…
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New at this and scared
I’m 73 years old and my wife is 68. She was diagnosed with very early Alzheimer’s last November (“mild cognitive impairment”) and started on monoclonal antibody therapy in January. Most people wouldn’t notice anything different about her but I can see that she forgets events, loses her keys (or leaves them in the front…
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Pursue diagnosis?
My 75 yo father is showing signs of dementia. His mother and paternal grandfather both had Alzheimer’s and that’s what to presents like to me—repeating himself, struggling with directions and finding things, mood swings, poor judgement, indecision, a lost look in his eyes—but he hasn’t seen a neurologist. His greatest fear…
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Lost my DH 3 months ago
My DH passed away 2 days before Christmas. I wasn't there when he passed. I visited him the day before. He was sleeping, I talked to him, played Elvis and held his hand. He held my hand so tight it hurt but I didn't let go. He was very peaceful. He had been on Hospice about 6 months for failure to thrive. His hospice nurse…
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Hope I am doing the right thinng
I am taking my wife to a memory care center in a couple of days. I really don't want to but Cathy is not improving. She is very inconsistent. Some days I can change her clothes with little issues yet other days it's liking herding cats. The PACE (Program of All-Inclusive Care for the Elderly) facility she is a member of…
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Dying of boredom
The total silence, the reproachful stare because I can't figure out what will entertain him, the complete lack of awareness of the state of the world, his family, me. Someone on this site said, wisely, we can't make them happy, only make them safe. But what do we do with our days while they sit and wait for us to make a…
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Dementia and Dating
Ok, just going to be straight-forward here. I've made the decision to get out and date again, find that special someone I can be with moving forward with. I'm exhausted caring my LO who's essentially a 6 yr. old at this point. I'm still in my mid-50s and don't want to continue on this way without a mate whom I can really…
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Communication Challenges
I’m really struggling with communication and would appreciate any advice. My partner was diagnosed with severe dementia and has continued to decline. They now refuse to visit any doctors, and I am the sole caregiver. Most of the time, it’s very difficult to understand what he's saying. At the same time, he often tells me…
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Circles of friends and contact lists
I recently received an email from one of my sister's friends who is feeling guilty about not contacting me before my sister was diagnosed with FTD and early onset Alzheimer's. Here's a portion of her email: I asked her to share your phone number with me but it was an odd request and she looked at me like she didn't…
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TRAVEL CAUSES DISORIENTATION
My LO is 64 with a diagnosis of EOAD. He is progressing faster than anticipated. Everyone is saying 'travel / do things / take them places'. But what I have discovered is there is a huge price to pay. Halfway through the 'experience' I see him start declining mentally. I can see it in his eyes and the disorientation…
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Severe dementia- yet Mom refuses to move out
Edit- I do have dpoa, on healthcare directive- drs say tough luck if she wont go voluntarily or is not easily tricked then wait for a crisis. drs have classified as severe dementia and highly recd she not live alone. They state there is nothing we can do other than wait for a crisis here (Kaiser-California). Mom will not…
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Dealing with my mom and driving
Hi. I am new here. My mom who is considered to have Stage 4 Mild Alzheimer's diagnosed about a year ago. She does not believe she has this disease. They told her to not drive and she could take the test through DMV to see if she could continue. We didn't do it at the time. Now a year later she is pushing to drive but I…
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As POA how do we protect loved one from large purchases they don't understand
My dad has Alzheimer's & can no longer drive. He wound up purchasing a car that he cannot drive when we were navigating his illness last year. (Note: Due to his 3-5 min memory the attorney general is currently investigating that purchase). He forgets that he cannot drive and has made his way to another dealership and…
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Preparing for someone to take my place
I cannot care for my husband. I am ill myself and I am not able to be a good companion. I can barely take care of daily tasks like cooking, housekeeping and trying to manage both my husbands illness and my own. My husband tries to help but often he doesn’t have the skills to do simple things anymore. He looks to me for…