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Paranoia and Blame to Caregiver- VENT
I do not have a family support group besides my husband to help me express my frustrations about taking care of my father with Alzheimer's. My father lived with us for about a year and it was the worst time of my life. I moved him into a retirement community right down the street from me and that was a huge weight lifted…
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Thanks to all who have written to me
I wrote on this message board for the first time a couple of weeks ago. I am not sure what I hoped for (it was recommended to me by my therapist). Over the past week, I have received nine wonderful postings from those of you out there who are struggling alone with the care of a loved one. It is so good not to be ALL ALONE…
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Not sure if I had shared this before.
https://acl.gov/CaregiverStrategy https://acl.gov/sites/default/files/RAISE_SGRG/NatlStrategyFamCaregivers_ActionsSCO.pdf https://nashp.org/raise-act-state-policy-roadmap-for-family-caregivers/
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Teeth Grinding(1)
My mother was diagnosed 3 1/2 years ago and I am looking forward to utilizing this discussion board for support. However, today I am posting for a friend who is caring for his wife who was diagnosed with early onset about six years ago and is currently in Hospice care at home. Recently his wife's teeth grinding has become…
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Preparing for the move to SNF
Well, I found a SNF for my mother. They called me Friday to tell me she has been accepted. I've been looking since October. Mom was approved for Medicaid LTC last fall, and has had Dementia for many years. It has progressed to the point that I can no longer handle being the sole caregiver. I am completely burnt out. I have…
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Are caregivers living in a ghost town?
It may take a village to raise a child, but you may discover a ghost town when it comes to the dying. ~Joy Johnston Why dying at home is not all it’s cracked up to be | The Caregiver Space I have a sister who has advanced cancer and most likely only has several months left. My mother is showing signs of moving towards…
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Small scale active games?
DW is at the stage where she needs detailed advice on how to shower, needs much help dressing, etc. I've taken over cooking, cleaning and all that. She's physically sound and in good shape, but mostly has little to occupy her. We've recently walked up to 7 miles in a day, and in warm weather she still rides the back of our…
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Warriorism of Caregiving
Attached are poems to help those who need them...
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HAD to share this email with you
Careblazers <natali@careblazers.com> To:Ed Sat, Jan 14 at 4:16 PM Careblazer, In the past, I've hosted several free, live dementia care classes. And those were great...for the ones who were able to attend live. As a dementia caregiver, you don't always have the ability to adjust your busy schedule to fit a training. That's…
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M1 your opinion please
I got a call from the pulmonologist yesterday regarding my mom’s CT scan. Her NSIP scarring is a little worse. Believed to be from some allergen or other exposure earlier in life as opposed to smoking( which she did for decades). However, her breathing function is fine. Doctor and I jointly ruled out an open lung biopsy to…
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Knowing When to Keep Quite
This is an ongoing battle for me, which I will take measures to adjust/correct in the new year in the same role (caregiving). The attached may help with this journey of change...it helped me just reading it.
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When am I getting out of here? What do you say?
My LO is in MC. But where ever she is, she constantly says, "I can't wait to get out of here." "I am a prisoner." "Where am I going next?" What do you all say to your LOs in these circumstances? She is in a new place near me. But she said the same thing at the before. I need a response that won't upset her and will let her…
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Memory Board - Helpful or frustrating
I moved my mom to an AL after a hospital stay. She has never been open to leaving her house, so I just tell her she's in rehab. The facility has several activities every day and they tell me she participates. When I talk to her, she doesn't remember the activities. She told me this morning she was tired of being stuck in…
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The Alz Connected website is being upgraded
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Music
While waiting in an ER hallway for more than 18 hours I played music on my phone whenever DH was getting a stick or felt anxious. I have about 4 or 5 songs that I play over and over for him. Really helps to calm him down.
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Trying to not fight. Vent
This is long so strap in for my complaining. Apparently the other day my grandmother fell and the word is she's fine just startled and afraid. Which makes sense. My aunt and cousin were trying to get other family members in to sit/watch/reassure gmom for two weeks. For some reason they don't want any lapse in someone there…
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Hospice on board
DH has been in memory care since mid August as I could no longer take care of him after he broke his ankle and also was doubly incontinent. I had been taking care of him for 4 1/2 yrs. with no outside help. Last week he once again was non- responsive and slumped to the side and drooling. They took him to the ER...2nd trip…
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What a day....
My sister stopped by today. I am thoroughly irritated though. She didn't let me know so that right there told me she didn't come with any intention of giving me a break. She stayed for 3 hours. The good news - I have an appointment with an attorney to discuss taking my sister to court for embezzlement and other actions…
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Closer to Stage 7
I'm afraid that hearing about our uncle's death has acted as a catalyst for Peggy's slide. He passed away on the 23rd, and every day since then, including today, Peggy has brought this up. She's a little hazy on whether he's actually dead, ("Uncle N is still dead, right?"), and then right after that, she asks if our aunt…
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Any chance we can take a poll?
So I would like to start by saying that my mother who is 76 has dementia and it is mild right now, but has gotten a little worse this year. My Uncle recently passed away with dementia so it seems I am probably going to have it. The common threads that my uncle, mother, and I have is that (1) we all snore and (2) we all…
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Social Security and Medicare address change when moving an elderly parent to another state
We have just succeeded in moving my elderly parent from the East Coast to the West Coast where I live. She is now living in MC unit of an AL community near me. Now we need to change her address for social security and medicare so she can get services here and her doctors can bill medicare, We could just change the address…
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Confusing my uncle for her husband
Hello, My Grandmother has middle stage. Since she was 35 she lived with her husband, who is now in a nursing home and suffers from late stage dementia. When the family figured out they, my grand parents, could not take care of themselves, we moved her to another state to stay with my uncle, her son. I came to visit for the…
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Tricks for prompting swallowing ?
Hello all, My mom is late stage dementia & Parkinson's. She has documented dysphagia and is on a honey-thick / pureed diet. That has helped a lot, but she still coughs and sputters occasionally -- there are good days and not-so-good days. For the past several months of the pureed diet, no issues with putting food in the…
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urine in sofa
Just a quick survey of which product you have found have worked best for removing urine from sofa cushions that can't be removed. Online sources say that an enzymatic pet stain remover is the way to go. Obviously mom should be more supervised and I will be ordering waterproof pads for the seats that she uses. Thanks!
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How to deal with Manipulative Elderly Family Members
This post is runoff from another post. Mom and her 4 remaining siblings are manipulative and, at least in my mom's case, have an inflated sense of self-importance (narcissistic). The narcissism is the lesser of the two evils and in my mom's case appears to be compensation for physical/mental decline. All roads in a…
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Mom with Dementia...convincing her to move into Assisted Living
Hi, new to the boards, hoping for some guidance Backstory Mom is 80 y.o female with multiple chronic diseases (COPD, Stage 3 kidney disease, Seizures, recurring Stage 1 lung cancer, aphasia/Dementia and Wernicke's due to sustained periods of heavy drinking. She was recently diagnosed with Moderate dementia (13 on MoCa,…
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Difficulty Getting my LO to Eat
Hello, Caregiver Community! This is my first post. My mom, age 72 is in late-moderate stage 4 or 5. My dad is primary caregiver and, after switching careers, I have made more time to give my dad some reprieve. I am writing because my mom is not eating well. She has already reached the point where favorite foods and…
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Life Alert type device recommendation?
Hi everyone, My Mom was diagnosed with Lewy Body Disorder a few months ago. For many years, she has had issues with walking and used a walker. At this point she is doing pretty well, but living completely alone is no longer an option so she will be moving in with me in the next few weeks. I am wondering if I should…
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Can't give up(1)
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 1/9/23
NO MATER WHERE WE ARE, earnest, honest prayer is heard by God. CAREGIVERS, take good care of yourselves. Hugs, Ronnie (VKB) Psalm 100 AMP A Psalm of Thanksgiving. Shout joyfully to the Lord, all the earth. 2 Serve the Lord with gladness and delight; Come before His presence with joyful singing. 3 Know and fully recognize…