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65 days in memory care
I haven't posted in a while, but I thought I would tell the story of my DH's adjustment to MC and ask you all a question. He had a very rough time for the first three weeks, then slowly began to adjust and to take part in activities which has progressed to him being fairly happy by six weeks or so. One of the reasons he's…
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Trying to keep my sanity
Hi. I'm relatively new here. My DH was diagnosed a year ago with Alz., but I noticed changes about 3 years prior to diagnosis. I'm not totally unfamiliar with Alz. as I was my Mom's advocate in her last few years with it. She has passed, but I thank her for the practice I received ... not that anyone wants practice or any…
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Steady decline …
Things are changing! Noticing a lot of little changes lately … choosing cookies for lunch over a sandwich, having a danish for breakfast instead of a protein, picking through his food taking out pieces of onion or peppers which he used to like, giving him his pj’s to change into and getting into bed with the same clothes…
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Fairly new to this dementia thing...
Just for some background, my DH's geriatrician recently diagnosed him with vascular dementia, based on the fact that he had a stroke 3-1/2 years ago. At the time we were told that the only outcome of the stroke was aphasia (word finding difficulty). Since that time he has become disabled due to a bad fall resulting in a…
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For any CALPERS retirees and caregivers of
We have been married for 37 yrs, my husband has had several strokes and has VD. Luckily his memory is still intact, he is capable of carrying on a conversation, understanding and can make his own decisions, albeit slow with his processing speed. I have always handled finances, bills, investments,etc. I thought I had taken…
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Another Step Down
I can’t rant, my compassion and love for my DH is too deep but I just need to talk to those that understand. I had a friend say to me yesterday if you ever need to rant just call, so kind of her but I don’t need to rant I need to cry sometimes I’m just so sad about this debilitating disease. We have this wonderful…
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Repercussions from shunt surgery.
My husband had a shunt put in for NPH (Normal pressure hydrocephalus) in July. Before that he had early Alzheimer’s dementia. After surgery, its a lot worse. We had to put door handle locks on the doors, shower & bathroom bars in the bathroom. He doesn’t remember anything. He makes things up, hallucinates. He’s losing his…
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Still waffling on MC placement
After touring MC facilities for my plan B, I started thinking that maybe DH would be happier and better cared for if he was there. There are a few reasons for this which I won’t go into but I haven’t made a decision yet. I am not good at being decisive - ironically that was one of the things that attracted me to my DH at…
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Anosognosia—When People Don’t Realize They’re Impaired
https://thedawnmethod.com/anosognosia-when-people-dont-realize-they-are-impaired/ The topic of anosognosia comes up regularly, particularly for people who are new here. It's confusing and confounding when your LO can't see their own impairment. I think this article is a good introduction. I hope it's helpful. People who…
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Do we ever sleep?
Here it is at 4 am. Been up since about 2:30 am, not unusual at all. As I scroll through the threads here, now and then offering my two cents, I noticed the times of postings. Amazing number seem to be posted during the very late hours of the evening or during the overnight hours. Do we, as caregivers, ever sleep? I know…
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Post for Lgb35 on Semantic Dementia
Lgb35 I saw your recent question on how to get info on Semantic Dementia (SD) in another thread but I thought answering there might get lost. "we received confirmation today that DH also has Semantic Dementia. When I asked for resources so we know what’s next and how this form progresses, I was told to look up FTD…
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Downsizing with Dementia
It's been three years since the official diagnosis though it was happening way before that. And I realize I haven't looked back. I haven't looked back at how we were before all of this crept in ever so slowly. And I actually forget who he was sometime back in our lives together when I never imagined anything like this. And…
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Social Scientists, We Are Here
As I read through the threads on here and, like all of you, find great value and comfort from this forum, I am struck by the discrepancies between our real life and what is described by most (I am sure there are exceptions) articles or studies. As I began our journey, the medical community could offer little, if any,…
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Our journey together.
We are in year 3 of my wife’s battle with Early Onset Alzheimer’s Disease but I still feel this way with her. To My Beautiful Wife Each time I look at you, I just smile to myself and think, You are perfect just the way you are, my one in a million. You are my special kind of love that makes me realize that life gave me the…
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DH always wants to leave the house
All day long, DH is constantly wanting to “get going”. He is fixated on walking a specific route in the neighborhood. We walk the route, stopping to talk to anyone we see (which is another challenge), we come home, change out of our sweaty clothes, then he says “are you ready to go?” This goes on ALL DAY LONG. He doesn’t…
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Feeling alone and lost
I have not got a diagnosis for my husband yet but its so difficult as he used to do so much and now he jist sits and I can't get him to do anything . I have been finding all kinds of stuff in trash cans almost daily I feel like a dumpster diver. if I asked him why he say I dont know and just like he didn't do it. I been…
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Sundowning
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living the movie Groundhog Day
My wife and I have had a wonderful 40+ years together. Recently, the neurologist diagnosed her Alzheimer's as "early moderate" stage. I believe the moderate stage began during the past year. The biggest change so far (in the moderate stage) is not greater loss in memory (although there is some). Rather, it's behavior…
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Refusing to take meds
This is a new problem for us. My DH is pitching a FIT when it’s time to take his meds. He absolutely refuses to do so. I’m probably not doing this right, but I beg him to take them for his dr’s sake. Last night I begged him to take them for Cody, that’s the dog. He did. He started chewing them a few weeks back, so I…
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Grieving
I find I am grieving the intimacy that we used to have. I tried to hug him this morning he said to me, I don’t love him. I felt like it tore my heart right out of my chest. We have been married for 67 years. It is my DH. I find myself often in tears I’m 84. I feel like I live in the house alone. He gets angry so easy I do…
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Help with restless, sleepless nights
At bedtime, my wife will sleep for about an hour then will become restless and repeatedly get up and down, then roam around the bedroom and upstairs all night like a zombie. She has moderate/late stage Alzheimers and takes risperidone (Risperdal) but doc is weaning her off and will replace with Geodon soon. She also takes…
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Is neuropshych exam worth it now?
DH was diagnosed with early AD via PET. We have upcoming scans to see if he's a candidate for the infusion treatments. We have a neuropsych exam (the 3-4 hour one) scheduled. Is it worth it to still get it done? Costs are rising and I'm not sure the value. Would love to hear some opinions.
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Considering move into Assisted Living for both of us
DH has AL, probably stage 4. He is 90 and I am a couple of years younger with my own health issues but still an active senior. Our children are concerned about 2 things: firstly what will they do with their father if I am suddenly incompacitated or die, and secondly they see the strain this is putting on me. In all…
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So over this...
I hate my husband. I've been thinking this way for a long time and just felt like I needed to say it. I hate everything about him and this disease. I have no help, so the last 7 years have been very difficult. I have some in home help starting soon. Sorry to burden everyone with such a negative post.
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How long can show timing last?
I was purposefully eavesdropping on my DH's phone conversation with his Mom because that's the kind of person I am now. And I was thinking how good he sounded with her. But then I heard him tell her about an argument he had with his sibling that did not really happen. He did this about six months ago before his diagnosis,…
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What Is Looking After Yourself
This might seem a bit silly but it’s said to me often by medical staff “look after yourself” Could I ask what does everyone do to look after themselves. Apart from getting enough sleep which is hard, is it a frame of mind, time out on your own once or twice a week and then where do you go. When you have a baby you never…
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Qualities I Need to Work On
Yesterday, DH wanted to go to the grocery store with me. I should have been pleased about this since he hasn’t had any appetite or energy lately. As he slowly pushed the grocery cart around using it as a walker, I gathered some items we needed; and he filled the cart with items that we don’t need, or he should not be…
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Long Naps
Can I just say…I love it so dang much when my DW takes a long nap. She's at about 3-4 hours a nap every day now. I know that means she's moving along, but I do enjoy these moments of quiet. I'm happy she gets them too.
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Questions About Elder Care Attorneys
I'm exhausted from not sleeping at night because I contacted an elder care attorney and they now want almost $9,000.00 to arrange things like Medicaid application, getting the house/cars/etc. into only my name. We already both had our Power of Attorneys, Wills and Five Wishes taken care of. My question is this - is this a…
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Photograph and Memories
Photograph And Memories By Miles Woolley My beautiful wife has an interesting history of high achievement in her education and intellectual advancement. She started her adult life with a bachelor’s degree in nursing and served in the Army Nurse Corps earning the rank of First Lieutenant. Following that, she returned to…