-
Today is our anniversary
DH doesn't remember that it is. I have not mentioned it. He was always the one to remember the dates of everything. Just makes me sad.
-
DPOA and Guardianship?
Has anyone here ever had to pursue guardianship despite having a durable POA? For more background the medical POA is springing (it was the only option the CELA offered to us). This summer my DH refused a move from a hospital stay to rehab and I was not legally able to override his decision since he has a springing health…
-
Just want to apologize
One of our members sent me a PM telling me about M1's partner passing, so I decided to stop by for a short visit. You have given me support and shared your stories with me when I needed it. Thank you for that. My wife has been gone for 2 years and almost 5 months now. But now I feel as though it is in my best interest to…
-
How many broken TVs is the limit?
DH gets peeved some nights if I ask him to brush his teeth and he gets worked up if his phone charger is not cooperating & this has led to an eruption of him throwing his phone on a few occasions. Last time he broke the TV. Time before just missed my head. He threw it tonight & I have not checked the TV for damage…just…
-
Just some thoughts
Just left my DW and she is sleeping more in her geri chair. She is digressing. I saw that blank look in her eyes and I know more of that will come. She reached for my face and caressed my face with a small tear in her eye. I don't know what that tear ment but I know she is growing weary of this long struggle. I don't know…
-
Alzheimer's?
My wife has been diagnosed with dementia, probably Alzheimer's. We have been down this road for about 6 years now. Her memory is very bad but otherwise she has not changed. We lead a fairly normal life with me directing all of her activities. Is it possible she has something other than Alzheimer's? Anyone else having this…
-
Lawrence Welk
Today being Saturday, I had nothing for my DW to watch . So was channel surfing and accidentally I tuned to PBS a channel I don’t normally watch . Lawerence Welk was on and guess what . My DW loved the show remembering quite a few of the songs and most importantly enjoyed seeing the pretty lady singers all “dolled up “ and…
-
Rough Week
A couple of weeks ago I went to my dermatologist for my annual skin check. She said a small mole on my back had changed color since last year and she removed it. I found out this week that it was a melanoma. She said it was early…in situ. She is going to have to take additional tissue to make sure to get all of it. I'm so…
-
Guilt
This cannot be a new subject, although a quick search didn't yield what I was looking for. I am 84, have leukemia. My DH is in ES to MS ALZ and is 89. Several of our children have been doing research on new treatments to slow this down. At least once a week, I'll get a text . or a phone call …"Mom, I read about…" I makes…
-
What stage and how long will it last?
I know every one is different but just wondering what stage and how long will this last. MY DH has gone from being angry and obsessed about driving to wanting sex all the time. He will not leave me alone and is always asking me if we are husband and wife. When he doesnt get his way he sulks and make comments under his…
-
Facing the move to memory care
I have made the decision to move my DH who has late stage Alzheimer's to a small residential memory care home. He will be moving on November 12. The physicality and relentless needs of his care have simply become too much for me to bear. I have no idea how to face this move or make it a lighter burden for either of us.…
-
Wow, I underestimated the loneliness
My husband went to memory care this week. It's going fine. He's settling in fairly well. I feel like a jerk for even saying this. I'm lost and lonely. I've never lived alone before (family, college, roommates, then my husband). I'm trying to keep busy. Dishes are done. Laundry is caught up (for the first time in 2 years).…
-
Time change
My husband is so confused and upset about the time change today. He just doesn’t understand when I explain it to him. He thinks something is going on that is bad, something is doing this to him. I thought things were going better the last 2-3 days, now this. Guess that’s the way it is. Will I ever get used to this?
-
My DH has lost his dentures
We are in our second year since diagnosis (probably 4 years since onset), and are somewhere in the fifth-sixth stage of ALZ. He has stopped wanting to take his denture out when we go to bed, so we have been cleaning it in the morning. Sometime last night he took it out and has misplaced it. I have looked everywhere for it,…
-
Interesting (and untimely) legal lesson about cremation: should I have just lied and told them we w
I hope this might be helpful to someone else, for me it's been a huge headache and unnecessary firedrill on an already fraught Friday afternoon. And importantly, something that neither my memory care contacts nor the hospice social workers were aware of. And that the cremation company didn't catch until this afternoon,…
-
Loves to talk to anyone who comes to the door
My DH has a routine list of things he talks about to anyone who will listen - I call it his yard tour. He starts with showing them the driveway, followed by every tree and plant in the front and back of the house. Some of it makes no sense, but most people will listen patiently, at some point probably realizing he has…
-
Final chapter
My DH passed last night. I had seen him in the afternoon, and hope he heard me tell him how much I loved him. I am glad his suffering is done. It all happened so quickly after his last ER stay a couple weeks ago, that it’s hard for me to process. But he never rebounded from that awful experience and simply stopped eating…
-
Everything is perfectly normal...maybe not
Just feel the need to "talk". DH in ES to MS Alz. He has seemed perfectly normal now for about two weeks. You'd have to live with him and pay attention to know anything was off. Well, there is the thing about needing to explain to him who is who and what that all means when we are watching TV and the thing about misnaming…
-
DH seems fine with everyone but me
My DH is starting his 10th year since Alz diagnosis. He exercised daily and ate healthy during the last 10 years and did exceptionally well. But he is declining now. He worries constantly about where his SS ck is … is our furniture paid for? … where do I live (we’ve been married 31 yrs) …. He thinks we just moved into this…
-
What Do I Need to Learn?
Hello all, Thank you for your collective wisdom. I've been reading posts and learning. My DH was diagnosed with ALZ a month ago. We're early in the process with MCI right now. He works, drives, cooks, etc. (but is slowing down cognitively and short term memory is poor). I'm taking some time off of work to get some things…
-
Glued to the tube
My wife of 39 years spends virtually all day every day watching TV. Mostly the news on a loop—and yet she asks me questions that make it clear that none of it’s sticking—ie. “who is running for president?”). It’s another beautiful fall day, but she has closed the blinds, is complaining of being cold (it’s not), and does…
-
Visiting DH A Huge Success
As some of you may recall, I have only visited DH once since his placement 1-1/2 yrs ago given the very first visit was a huge disaster. With his neurologist telehealth appointment coming up in December, I figured I had better not make the telehealth appt day be my first "revisit." Moreover, I felt obligated to bring him…
-
Adjusting to part time caregiver
I’ve been a full time caregiver for my husband for 5 years. He is in the moderate stage of Alzheimer’s and resists going to day programs. I hired an experienced part time caregiver to help me a few times a week. My husband doesn’t understand this new person in our home and was very irritated with me the second time I left…
-
Here we go again
My LH loves woodworking. He is determined to work on a couple Christmas gifts. He has always been very independent with his projects and never needed assistance. Now I need to help him each step of the way taking my time and even then he can’t follow the directions and instructions or drawings or measurements that we…
-
Support group
My 76 year old wife was diagnosed in September with moderate Alzheimer's just 10 months after an initial MCI diagnosis. Luckily I have lots of local family support. I've just registered for an in-person support group. What can I expect from the meeting?
-
So happy to have found this group!
Hi, All, I just joined this group. I posted the following as a reply in another discussion and someone suggested I create a new discussion to introduce myself: My partner's neurologist just moved his diagnosis from Mild Cognitive Impairment to Alzheimer's. This has been reported by law to the DMV and he will be heading…
-
second home
I haven't seen conversation about owning a second home, or vacation home, and I know there are others like me who have a dw or dh with alzheimer's and have thoughts about how to handle it. Ours is a vacation home in a popular tourist area that we bought knowing that dw has alzheimer's but did it for her enjoyment knowing…
-
Is It Dementia or Aphasia
my husband has Frontotemporal Alzheimer’s Dementia and Primary Progressive Aphasia. It seems to me his symptoms are the PPA more than the dementia. Is that possible? How do I tell the difference?
-
Don't argue, redirect
The above is the one of the best ideas I have learned on this site. DW and I got home from a visit with our son this evening, and she got to complaining about the state of her wardrobe. This is a chronic problem. All 30 pairs of her shoes are "worn out", etc. I bought her a couple of new sweaters earlier this week, but she…
-
…of course she isn’t really there
You’ve heard of phantom limb syndrome, well I’m having phantom wife syndrome. A number of times a week I very briefly, just for a moment, experience a feeling that my DW is with me. She’s been in an MCF for over two years and the hospice nurse tells me they have just determined she is Stage 7f (on the Fisher scale), the…