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POAs and requirements for incompetence
My mom was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, and I’ve started the planning process with her. One thing I’m struggling with and can’t seem to get a straight answer on is the wording of her health care POA, It states that she needs to be determined incompetent by a medical professional before decisions can be made on her…
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No short term memory
My DH is in the same category. Honestly, the repetitive questioning drives me crazy. I constantly pray for patience. Sometimes I don't answer my DH and a lot of times I remove myself and go to another room to regroup.
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Just venting
Today is a UGGGG day. Everything is do is meet with a hateful attitude. Want to scream or cuss but I don't. I just go in the next room and scream silently UGGG!
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Skilled nursing care vs memory care
Looking for information and advice. We took my wife to a well-regarded memory care center but their assessment determined she had too many needs and required skilled nursing care instead. We were disappointed. The SN facility is more like a hospital ward than MC but the rooms can be personalized with some furniture,…
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I wonder if I am seeing things not there
My wonderful husband of 49 years was diagnosed 2 years ago with MCI, he is slipping more (forgetting conversations that just occurred, throwing out items we need, personality changes, etc.) and I anticipate at our appointment with his neurologist later this month, he will "upgrade" his diagnosis. All of this being said, my…
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Leqembi
Just feeling blue this morning. Neurologist offered Leqembi infusions to DH with ALZ. DH is 90. It's 18 months of every other week infustions that will only delay the inevitble by months, not years, and if he does't have a brain hemmorage or stroke there are high odds of migranes and other side effects. We opted not to do…
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My DH has changed and I’m afraid
my DH just turned 70 but has been struggling with issues for awhile. He changes moods, is depressed and withdrawn, does not have healthy hygiene , smokes both pot and cigarettes , drinks a lot ( beer wine) has juvenile diabetes insulin dependent . He has started to misplace things, wallet keys, checkbook. He doesn’t pay…
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DH fixated on being able to drive.
DH is so fixated on being able to drive again he has become very depressed and says life is not worth living. He says he feels like he is in jail and can't do anything. I can drive him anyplace he would like to go. When I ask him where he would like to go he doesn't have an answer. Dr.'s have told him he shouldn't drive…
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T shirt question
A basic question about T shirts…the undershirt kind. DH has lost so much weight-and height-. that his size large T shirts are way too large now. The T shirts are very roomy and so long they come below his hips. When I get him dressed I am stuffing all this extra material in his pants so it doesn't hang below the outer…
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Sharing a tip to get DW to change clothes
DW is early stage 6. For the past few months it has been a struggle / conflict to get her to change her clothes. I have found something that seems to work (for now) and would like to share. If I tell her to change right when she wakes from sleep, we are able to get into clean clothes with minimal to no resistance.…
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Balance
My DH is 25 year older than I am. He is 94, I am 69. I've known this was coming for about 15 years. Early years were challenging, but COVID was the hammer that drove nails into the structure of our lives. I moved him into a MC about a year ago. I was dealing with other "stuff" at the (my brother was killed in an automobile…
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In Loving Memory of “Jo C”
I’m reaching out, again, on behalf of my beautiful mom, Johanna “Jo C” Richardson, a passionate Peer Volunteer for nearly 20 years. Many of you knew that Jo C had been diagnosed with a progressive lung disease a couple of years ago. The disease did progress and Mom passed away peacefully at home the evening of June 19,…
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Alzheimer's Screening and Prevention (ASAP) Act
It's a start and hopefully it will lead to more. I also posted this under General Topics. https://www.alz.org/news/2025/house-introduces-bipartisan-legislation-asap-act-alzheimers-screening#:~:text=This%20transformative%20bill%20will%20provide,and%20dramatically%20improve%20early%20detection.
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Social Media post/comments
My DH is into the mid stage of Alz I believe. Diagnosed over a year ago. He's still able to care for himself, but speaking and following instructions etc. Are definate difficult. Along with other things he gets confused on he is not able to write very well any more. Always asking me how to spell words. He has been on FB…
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Stage 5 and not aware
My wife has ALZ , solid Stage 5 showing some Stage 6 symptoms. I have told her she has Alzheimer's, she then looks puzzled and forgets it 5 minutes later. She is unaware of her condition and appears to think she leads a normal life. She is getting more difficult to manage and has most of the nasty symptoms you hear about.…
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When the marriage was not good.
I am embarrassed about my title, but it is my truth and I have to find out if I am alone in my situation. In my family it has always been that when we get old, the veil of self-delusion about our lives lifts, and we are faced with our truths. My husband of 38 years has been the absolute love of my life, I have remained IN…
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Sundowners
I've been caring for my wife who is suffering from Alzheimer's. She is in the middle stages and it is progressing. Since the time change her sundowners is getting worst every night She does not know I'm her husband Demands I Leave the house, its her house and not mine. I currently only have the help from her sister but it…
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Yin and Yang
How can i be so happy and sad at the same time. It’s our birthday’s mine is the 8th DH 9th we have always celebrated together. It’s always been such a fun time of family and friends parties and dinners. Now it’s too uncomfortable to go out to dinner DH needs to be fed and food falls either on the floor or down his shirt,…
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Jason Aldean song “Help You Remember”
He is raising money for Alzheimer’s. He had a family member with dementia. Beautiful song. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fKEVGVOYG84
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in stage 8 after a fall
My wonderful husband passed last Thursday near midnight. He had been experiencing some episodes of lashing out toward the staff of his memory care home (utterly unlike any behaviors before) and I had met with executive staff who thought because he'd had a week with out of town visitors, being taken to golf range, etc. he…
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Home for the Holidays
Hi to all, I ran across this video while checking to see if any new ones popped up on my YouTube channel. I found it to be quite helpful and relevant for this time of year. The title is “Caregiving and the Holidays: From Stress to Success” through the Wellmed Charitable Foundation. (If the link below doesn’t open for you,…
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‘Me Time’ Confusion
I just need to talk about my confused reaction to ‘me time’. With the generosity of the Government I now have subsidised help every fortnight in the house, floors, bathroom, changing sheets on the bed etc; and garden maintenance mowing the lawn. This is a great relief. I also have a Carer that comes weekly for two hours…
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No short term memory
I’m so worried. My DH was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s 4 years ago. It has been a gradual decline until now. He has no short term memory. Within minutes or seconds he is asking the same questions or cannot understand a situation. Yet he looks and acts perfectly normal around others. From your experience where do we go from…
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Caregiving Rookie
We don't have an "official" diagnosis yet, but after two years of doctor visits, medical tests, and eventually specialists, it appears likely that my DH is in the early stages of Vascular Dementia. I feel blessed that he currently acknowledges that something is wrong, but I can see his acceptance beginning to wane as the…
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My DW's pain levels
Hi Y'all, My DW of 57 years was diagnosed two and a half years ago. She is currently between levels 3 and 4, in my estimation. Our GP prescribed Memantine 10 MG twice a day and Donepezil 10 MG once a day at her diagnosis. I don't know if or how much that helps her. I asked our GP about 6 months ago if he felt they were…
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Changes in vision - info to help communicate
When someone with dementia seems confused, startled, or disconnected during a conversation, it may be because they literally cannot see you. As dementia progresses, peripheral vision narrows and the visual field becomes limited. This means a person with dementia often only sees what is directly in front of them, and they…
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endgame
How and how often would one tell one's spouse who feels awful all the time and who has no short term memory that the likelihood of her ever feeling better is probably nil, and that she is likely facing years of decline?
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Scared of the clarity
My bf who is 46yo (eoa/ftd) stage 7, on hospice. No end of life care (morphine, haloperidol, the usual stuff). The last few weeks we have noticed a big decline. He stopped walking a little over 2 weeks ago, food intake has been baby food, ensure and pureed food as well. Well today his best friend came, who was just here…
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Atrophy of hands
My DH is in the middle stages of Alzheimer’s and has been developing atrophy of the hands making it hard to button shirts, open jars or do a lot of things requiring finger dexterity. He is going to PT but is told each visit that he needs to do a set of exercises to 30 minutes to 1 hour a day. I have to keep reminding him…
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keep or cancel phone?
Hello All-I have a question that has been on my mind for quite some time. My husband, who has dementia and is living in a boarding care facility has not used or needed his cellphone for many months now. I kept it as a just in case for the authentication code thingy but now everything is tied to my cellphone instead. I pay…