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The Cavalry Is Not Coming: 9 Year Edition
This is an updated version of The Cavalry Is Not Coming. I repost this occasionally as I have been informed that this article has helped many caregivers. This edition is mostly the same, although I have brought it up to date and revised it to make it more helpful. October 1, 2024 marked nine years since my wife’s dementia…
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Lewy bodies(1)
My husband was diagnosed 5 years ago with Alzheimer’s. Now we have been told he has Lewy Bodies with Parkinson. He is taking Depakote and Seroquel. Has anyone had this to happen and medication?
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A Cautionary Tale: Details Emerging About Hackman's Death
I'll put a trigger warning here. This is difficult reading. It has been determined that Gene Hackman died from cardiovascular disease and Alzheimer's a full week after his wife succumbed to Hantavirus. She was among the oft quoted 1/3 of caregivers who died before their LO. Friends describe his wife as fit, healthy and 3…
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I'm Burning out
DH is actually very sweet (most of the time). We have a companion/caregiver two afternoons a week and I can get out for a bit. It helps but not as much as I thought it would. I realize I'm burning out but he's not yet at the point where he needs MC. I struggle to do housekeeping, bill paying, I'm just putting everything…
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He doesn't give up
I have previously posted about difficulties dealing with my ex-boyfriend. To summarize, he was diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment 4 years ago. He is retested every year with the same result. He manages all his daily living activities with no problems. He also bowls, golfs, dances, navigates the computer and all his…
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physical exercise in memory care
My DW has been in MC for just two weeks. The MCF doesn't really have any facilities for real exercise. DW is in pretty good physical condition now. We regularly walked the dog, and she saw a personal trainer once a week. Without exercise, I imagine she can deteriorate quickly, losing muscle tone and balance, not to mention…
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PET Scan Amyloid results
DH just had amyloid pet scan. Just reaching out to see if anyone has any insight on where he might be with all of this based on the widespread findings. Findings were: "Tracer activity is noted in the brainstem and cerebellar peduncles but not in the cerebellar hemispheres. Tracer activity is noted in the frontal,…
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Feeling nauseous, sweating, shaking
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Need tips for keeping DW in her home as this progresses.
We are clearly in the stage now where I cannot do this in our home by myself. I have set up paid companion care 3 days a week, 5 hours per shift. I think I can also get some help from family for a few hours a week. I am continuing to look at placement and make sure I am educated and prepared if it comes to that. We live in…
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Shuffling and Gait Changes
How many of you have observed your LOs developing shuffling and stiff gaits. My DH has recently experienced an acceleration of these symptoms. I suspect he is transitioning from 5 to6.
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EOAD and Amyloid PET Scan
DH just saw a new neurologist and she is trying to get an amyloid PET scan for confirmation of EOAD or FTD. MMSE is showing he is in stage 2 with mild dementia. No longer in the MCI category. Have any of you had the scan? Did your commercial insurance plan cover it? The doctor said it will reveal EOAD so we can talk about…
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Driving
My friend has an at home caregiver. She has not driven her car in four months. The aide or I take care of the driving. She had a dead battery which we fixed. Now she wants to drive it, just around the corner. I suggested I drive. She did not want that. She wants to drive with me..I do not want to be in the car with her.…
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Service dog
My wife was diagnosed about 3 weeks ago with Mild Cognitive Impairment with Alzheimer's pathology. She's 64 years old and I'm 54. I don't remember who brought it up, but the idea of having a service dog was discussed. My wife has pretty much always had a dog. Right now we have a 13 year old American pit bull and a 2&1/2…
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Should we proceed with testing
my husband has mci(22 score on Moca). We went to neurophysiologist and he ordered a in-depth test. My husband has severe sleep apnea that took almost a year to correct. He was having 36 episodes per night. The neuro wants the test because of that and his low score. my husband feels conflicted to get a diagnosis it just…
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traveling with spouse with dementia- beginning stages
Husband has posterior cortical atrophy so forgets things easily, has no peripheral vision. But we love to travel. Considering the Caribbean to escape MN winter. We love to walk together. Plan to stay in one place from approx march 3-10. any ideas? thanks. Lois
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looking for advice for "chattering"
For a few weeks now, it has been non stop repetitive nonsense coming from my DW combined with the intense shadowing which means she is rarely more than an arm's length away. I know ALZ is not a mental illness, but that is certainly how it looks and feels. I get to listen to her lose her mind in real time, non stop. Nothing…
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Any tips for a caregiver to work out?
I’ve tried 5 caregivers. Every time, my DH (stage 6) likes them the first day, after that doesn’t want them around. Follows me everywhere very agitated. I’m tired and need help. Caregiver # 6 is starting Monday. So far she is the best I’ve seen, a CNA, works in hospice lots of experience. Very passionate about her work,…
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first visit to memory care
I made my first visit today to see my DW in memory care. She's been there just over a week. I was advised to stay about an hour and to arrange a signal with the staff so I could excuse myself "to go to the bathroom" and leave. It was hard and terribly sad to see her. DW said over and over, "I miss you so much." She asked…
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Jay Leno caring for wife with dementia
https://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/jay-leno-stands-marriage-vows-faces-challenges-caring-wife-suffering-dementia
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Won’t let me help clean him up
This is not a nice topic, but you all know how it is in this forum. 😉 DH is at the point where he isn’t cleaning his behind well after using the toilet. We both have always closed the door when we used the bathroom throughout our long marriage. So now when I knock on the door and ask if I can come in or if he needs any…
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Long Geri-Psych Stay!
At the end of last month/beginning of this month, I posted that DH had a complete mental breakdown at his rehab center, where he was recovering from a fractured tibia. He was transferred to the local ER. Here's the update: After 2 days in the ER, on April 2, he was transferred to an inpatient Geri Psych facility. He's…
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Not eating , can the reason be because of knowing what lyes ahead ?
I 've read that with dementia that eating habits can change . Food tastes different , etc. etc . But my fear is that my DW is starving herself so not to put me or our family through the journey . Is there anyone else who has had this feeling or actually experienced this ?
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RAV phone
My husband can not work the simple Jitterbug phone any longer and I am thinking of getting him a RAV phone. They are $ but I need something for him in case of emergency. Does anyone have any experience with these - good or bad? Thank you
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Does Memory Care actually help
I obviously have been obsessing about memory care for months. My husband is probably late stage 5, can't do any ADL's without help, very bad arthritis so walking is difficult. We go to twice weekly exercise classes and various musical events and will occasionally take a short walk in a nearby canyon. He will walk short…
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The Mental Switch
Hey all, Many of you have talked about how at a certain point, you made a mental switch from loving spouse to loving caregiver…or something along those lines. I'm curious about how you've done that. My DW is getting more paranoid and complains about how "I'm not taking care of her needs", which means sitting next to her…
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Life Insurance
Just throwing this out there as food for thought….if any of you are caring for a loved one that is going through any issues related to AD and do not have individual life insurance, be sure YOU protect yourself and your loved ones for future health issues. Get an individual life policy that will potentially cover expenses,…
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Paranoia
DH is 62 and still working. He is constantly telling me that nobody at work talks to him and that I am making life decisions without him. He also is saying our adult sons don’t talk to him and our grandson that lives with us is different. Our grandson has not changed his interactions with DH. Is this paranoia? Is this part…
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Mental Illness dementia or something else
Hi everyone, I am still coping with my moms memory issues and diagnosis. I am truly baffled: her issues are so obvious to me, my one other family member who knows her, and the people in her AL. But when I bring her to the doctor, desperate to get her some kind of care of evaluation for her memory issues, they either…
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Just dropping by.
I've been around for several years, first as a caregiver for my mother, under a different name. About halfway through my caregiving journey with Mom, which lasted about a decade, I began noticing several red flags with my husband. Now others in our family are seeing those alarms, and we're also dealing with my…
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My favorite picture
Today we spent Easter together, just the two of us and looking at pictures. Pamella saw a picture of me and said that it was her favorite. She asked me if I had a favorite. I found one and said that was my favorite. It really made me think about what was really my favorite picture. After thinking about it and the favorite…