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dealing with our LO's anger
My DW have vascular dementia (sorry I can't use the acronym VD😂). About a year ago she became angry and has stayed that way. I spent every day trying to do things that would make her happy to no avail. I placed her in MC 3 months ago. She remains angry and upset with me. I visit her daily for about an hour. The first 30…
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What should we be hoping for?
Several years back, after months of testing and imaging, we got the EO ALZ diagnosis from the neurologist. Prior to the diagnosis, upon our first visit, I noticed all the rooms we used at neurology has many boxes of tissues. I thought that was odd, but we eventually found out why there were there. Going into this, I…
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How accurate are estimated time of stage 6 & 7 ?
When my DW was diagnosed with early onset (Oct 2021), we were told she was stage 4. Just recently I took a really close look at the clinical stages and it seems we are now clearly in the early part of stage 6. Last time I saw our social work was about a year ago and she said our rate of progression appears "typical". My DW…
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Clothing for Stage 6-7?
My DH is stage 6, I’ve switched to pull up pants instead of button up. They are easier to get on and off. I’ve been going through his clothing, he was such a fashion fanatic and has a great wardrobe, but should I let the button up pants, shorts go? Has anyone felt at this stage that button ups are better for any reason?
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Periodic changes in behavior getting more concerning
My wife was diagnosed with Alz 5 years ago at 65 years old. She has a strong family history on her Mom's side and we noticed concerns at least 2 years prior. Her memory decline was slow the first couple of years and then I started to notice more pronounced changes at roughly 3 month intervals. This winter she started to…
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Collateral damage from dementia
I am sole caretaker for DH with VD for several years. Like all of you, we care, show up everyday, we do our best, yet this awful disease affects us too. It not only affects our mental and physical health but also our relationships with friends and family. My 2 grown sons live on the opposite coast and I have not seen them…
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Spouse not eating or drinking enough .
I seem to have come to a difficult time with my DW on eating and drinking and taking a shower . She keeps telling me no to all those things that are important . This issue I know will probably turn bad but I would like to know if anyone has any input on this matter . P.s I've tried mostly everything that has been suggested…
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Vascular Dementia Coping
As recommended by another user I am making a new thread here. hello my husband is in a facility which is hard I’m 76 years of age and have been taking full care of him since 95.he had a lot wrong with him last summer he locked me out of the house.since then he was diagnosed with vascular dementia.my daughter and I have…
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Grateful for returns to normalcy
My DW is showing signs of more deterioration. Getting her interested in a movie used to help, but now she has to repeatedly ask who the characters are related to, who the “good” guys and “bad” guys are, etc. Then she took a nap and we had two hours of normalcy. I am still smiling.
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Ostomy management
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Covid and he won’t stay away!
I came down with Covid 2 days ago. DH withVD has been ok so far. I am trying desperately to separate myself from him, asking him not to come into the bedroom to wear a mask but to no avail. I know he doesn’t understand/remember. It’s frustrating and I’m at my wits end. I want to rest, get better and not get him sick but he…
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video cameras to monitor hired in home care
For people who hire help in your home for respite care and such, what is your perspective and experiences with having cameras in the house to record / monitor what happens while you are gone? It has been recommended that I use cameras but I am concerned that it will interfere with the trust I hope to develop with the…
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Speech Language Therapy
My husband was diagnosed with Mild Cognitive Impairment. He does well for himself, has no medications to manage, exercises, and sings in two choirs. He does have problems with word retrieval and sometimes needs time to process someone else's speech or express his own needs. We were referred to a speech language therapist.…
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Failed my first test
Since my husband’s diagnosis about a month ago, I have been super focused on not over reacting, arguing, correcting him if he’s wrong, etc. and have been doing really well. Yesterday out of the clear blue he told me he had made a decision. I asked what decision he had made. He told me that he decided he was going to go to…
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Struggling to regain control of my life
I've always been a strong positive woman with an internal locus of control...until blindsided by DH's dementia. These days my life runs me, time is not my own. I stay on top of all that needs to get done, take care of my husband but find there's no time or energy left for myself. We put everything in to caregiving and…
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Social worker coming .
Any comments on palliative care ?
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Does anyone forget how far there LO is
Sometimes I forget what stage he is in. I think I do alot of scaffolding without realizing it. Today I went back and looked at his test results. Not good. He has both VD and Ad. It was just a reality check.
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Lessons learned
Sometimes we act emotionally instead of rationally. My DH with VD and I both miss the RV trips we used to take so I decided we should continue to make a few more memories while we can. This trip was more for me to have some recent memories when he's gone than for him. Not my wisest idea. We stayed close to home and only…
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Medication Thoughts: Quetiapine, Risperidone, Lorazapam, ABH Gel
My wife is in Stage 7 Alzheimers per the FAST Scale and has changed her behavior in the past weeks including being more Anxious, Confused and Combative. This week she had what I would describe as a hallucination episode and was very anxious, upset and uncontrollable for about 30 minutes. She has severely restricted her…
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What was I THINKING 🤔
yesterday we / I decided to join our daughter at the Casino in Laughlin for dinner and play a few slots. Dinner was great then we all headed for the slots😆we all thought my LO( loved one) was with the other ? After about a half hour we realized we lost him 🤦♀️after searching we found him sitting alone at a machine with no…
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Just need to talk to my friends (203)
It has been a beautiful day, sunny and 75. Meant to check on the daffodils but forgot. The ones I can see from the kitchen window look okay! QVC has started their gardening shows so Spring is near. They had the perennial Gerbera daisies again today. So pretty. I bought them two years ago and had one bloom and they didn't…
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Advice
My husband was diagnosed with early stage Alzheimer’s three weeks ago. His doctor has recommended the leqembi treatment. I’ve read all of the risks and comments on this site. My problem is, do I tell my husband the risks and scare him even more or do I make the decision for him, knowing that he would want to try even with…
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Loneliness, Fear & Sadness
New to this forum. My husband has ALZ and is no longer the kind, considerate, thoughtful, brilliant man he was. I'm feeling overwhelmed with grief, loneliness and functional depression. Although I get through each day and night, I do it without grace. I struggle each day to find my old personality — I was kind, and patient…
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It's not 'agitation' - It is RAGE AND AGRESSION
and it gets worse. I have watched my husband who was officially diagnosed with Alzheimer's near 3 years ago simply marinate in his misery. Nothing I have tried has served to help him. There were unresolved issues that were percolating before the more serious onset of the disease (forced retirement with no interests,…
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Revenge
I didn’t know that a person with dementia could be so revengeful. My husband is a hoarder and he has been collecting things from all over the house. It could be trash it could be trinkets or food etc. He puts them in the corner of the room where he sits. I have to clean up or it will get unreal. I sometimes throw things in…
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The hurt from letting go
My DW is in the middle stage of memory loss. When she was lucid, she said she felt I didn’t love her anymore. I have to admit that my feelings are changing. Her behavior can exhaust me, and I realize that I communicate less simply in order to reduce my stress. It is a lousy spot to be in for both of us, but I don’t see any…
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A Wife and A Partner
Not sure why I'm posting this……I'm not looking for validation and certainly don't need judgment. I guess just sharing my experience. My wife was diagnosed with early on-set Alzheimer's over 7 years ago. She is currently non-verbal, fully incontinent, and unable to do anything for herself. I am blessed that she is still…
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How do you know when it's time for hospice?
Several people here have shared their experiences with hospice. I'm not familiar with it at all, so any advice/explanation would help. My DH is showing more physical signs of decline: losing weight even though he still eats well (160 lbs from 196), is starting to stumble, and becoming incontinent. I know some of that is…
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UTI, Pneumonia, Sepsis and Hospital = Sharp Mental Decline
I have read here many times about how UTI's and hospital admittance escalates dementia and now I am experiencing it. My DH is in stage 5 of Vascular dementia. He was admitted in hospital Sunday evening with UTI, pneumonia and sepsis. He is 83 years old. Fortunately, we came home yesterday afternoon as he responded very…
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The Constant Digs
just a vent. I could really use a day where I don’t get to hear from my DW how I just don’t quite treat her right and I don’t do enough for her. I am gentle, supportive and kind to her and I get back complaints about how something’s just not right with me. Oh honey…it’s not me. Grrrrr