-
Turning Corners and Crossing Bridges
Belated Happy Thanksgiving, y’all! I remain so grateful for this group, the life I’ve had with my DW, and even for parts of the life I still have with her. With that, the holiday was difficult as she turned another corner. Her stepdaughter and family were here, which was so nice on one hand. On the other, my DW asked me…
-
Lack of comprehension
My DH is Stage 6 Alz and under Hospice care. I am currently at 10 years on our journey with this disease and certainly there have been challenges but for the most part I feel I have handled it fairly well. For awhile now I have not been able to understand what he is saying. However the last week or so my DH no longer seems…
-
hallucinations
:(
-
hallucinations
My wife just started to have hallucinations and keeps me awake in bed. Any suggestions
-
Love & go on...
A friend posted this on Facebook and I thought it might help someone who lost a loved one this year. I'm having a hard time this year. Love & hugs to you all. 🙏💜
-
Want to get this off of my chest
Hi y’all. I haven’t been reading or writing lately. May everyone find mercy ,under standing, acceptance and peace on your journey. My wife and I are not doing well on ours. She is in stage seven now. Stuck in bed or a Jerry chair not eating mumbling and looking like she is miserable. I cry every time I see her and get very…
-
Expected taxes from SSDI (disability) income??
Hello, My husband is 56, diagnosed with EO Alzheimer's in November of '23 (at age 55), but showed obvious signs of decline beginning at about age 52-53. I'm so relieved that he was approved for SSDI in October (5 months after applying) and we will receive his first disability check this month. It will come RIGHT as his…
-
Ambiguous Grief
Bill recently used the term "ambiguous grief," and I didn't know what it meant. Here's what some Googling turned up: …search results for the meaning and symptoms of dementia and caregivers' ambiguous grief. Ambiguous Grief in Dementia Caregiving: Physical Presence, Psychological Absence: Dementia causes a gradual loss of…
-
How long did your loved ones stay in stage 5, 6, and 7?
I’ve read Tam Cummings staging and estimated duration of each. I’m curious as to everyone’s experience here on the time your LO’s spent in each of these stages? My DH went through 3 and 4 fast (just over a year) and is a solid 5 now with a couple of cognitive areas in 6. Do most make it to 7? I can handle a lot but am…
-
Estate Planning for Long Term Care
I was on Colorado Medicaid for Seniors website and found some interesting information. They mentioned working with a Medicaid Planning Professional if you are over-income and/or over-asset. Have you ever done this or used Eldercare Resource Planning (a company they connected me to}?
-
Bible Verse to Lift You Up 12/1/24
GOD IS WITH YOU AND ME Psalm 139:16-18 New International Version “Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. 17 How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! 18 Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand—…
-
What to say before taking DH to a day care place for a first time visit.
Hi, I have a question about what to say to my DH before I take him to visit a day care facility tomorrow. I am still his full time care taker with occasional help with our adult children. I am thinking of starting him out one half day a week and going from there, depending on how he does. He will want to know where we are…
-
Epitome of Grief
Flying home yesterday with my husband from a lovely last hurrah holiday at a beautiful resort visiting good friends, our son, and grandchildren; he assimilates easily back into his memory care facility as he just doesn’t know, but I’m inconsolably choked with tears . During this getaway, I looked straight into my husband’s…
-
Vacation
My husband has moderate vd dementia. Prior to this dx, we bought a timeshare that I am still paying on. The idea of not being able to travel and use that is awful to me. I still work full time and have a companion with him most of the day. Our last vacation was when I saw a huge difference in him and he "lost" the memory…
-
Bathroom issues
Maybe I’m in the dark about what to expect, but this evening my husband went to the bathroom, was in there a long time. I went in to see what he needed and there was a mess in the sink and on the toilet seat. I’m not sure what transpired when he was in there but I’m thinking I need to hang out outside the bathroom door…
-
Help with fiblet - moving DW into MC
I am moving my DW into MC next week and I am trying to come up with a fiblet to tell her on move in day. My SIL suggested that I tell her that I need to go back to OH (we live in WI) to take care of my older sister for a time and that I found a place for her to stay while I am gone. I do think she will buy this fiblet but…
-
The Cavalry Is Not Coming: 9 Year Edition
This is an updated version of The Cavalry Is Not Coming. I repost this occasionally as I have been informed that this article has helped many caregivers. This edition is mostly the same, although I have brought it up to date and revised it to make it more helpful. October 1, 2024 marked nine years since my wife’s dementia…
-
Its Our Turn. Preparing to say farewell...
Unbelievably, though we knew it was coming in the not too distant future, DH is transitioning right before my eyes. He rallied in the last 2 weeks, and now suddenly we are walking through the steps for last day/s on this earth. I will let you know when I can. For now, I have been assured by hospice that he is in very good…
-
Driving
Hi all My OH is currently being assessed at a memory clinic. We have not had a formal diagnosis, we visited the memory clinic, late October, and this is the first time we have met the consultant, or in fact any fully qualified doctor, previously it was a junior doctor and an OT. I think based on my OH ACE III test score he…
-
Feeling Very Thankful
I just want to express my sincere appreciation to all of you who show up on this site. The shared experiences, rants and raves, insights, advice and love and shared vulnerabilities have made a real difference to me in how I’m able to navigate my day to day with my DW. Wishing You All the very best Thanksgiving possible.…
-
Holidays without him.
Last year 11/23/23 was the last holiday I spent with my DH Lonny. I have no pictures of that day. Shortly thereafter I was diagnosed with aggressive cancer & had no choice but to place him immediately in Memory Care. He spent Christmas alone there. It broke my heart in two. He passed August 12th and I am dreading the…
-
How to help Grands understand??
My DH this afternoon just snapped and yelled at our grand-daughter for not speaking to him when she came in. Cussing and saying he was not taking that damn sh*t no more from her🤦♀️🤦♀️…. She is 12 and it really hurt her feelings and she didn't know what to do. I was a good buffer got him turned around and back in house. I…
-
This really set me back !!
my wife and trouble signing her name I think she had trouble with our last name. This really hit me. I guess more to come.
-
Being able to sleep with him again
I've read so many comments here that reflect my own feeling of loss at no longer being able to sleep with my DH. It is such a simple yet intimate and comforting thing to do. He's been in a memory care facility for almost 6 months. It's close to home and I visit him at least every other day, often trying to nap together in…
-
Nuedexta
My DH physician has prescribed Nuedexta to help manage some of the symptoms associated with FTD such as angry ,combative and obsessive behaviours. This medication is a combination of Dextromethorphan and Quinidine and primarily used for folks who have TBI who have issues with uncontrollable crying and laughing etc.. So far…
-
Home
A fitting description of what LOs seeking "home" must feel… “Someday, I would like to go home. The exact location of this place, I don't know, but someday I would like to go. There would be a pleasing feeling of familiarity and a sense of welcome in everything I saw. People would greet me warmly. They would remind me of…
-
Visit from family
Today, my daughter, SIL and grandson are coming to visit. DH is totally confused and agitated, thinking that his sister is coming to visit instead and seems to be under stress because of the visit. Relations with this daughter are a bit strained - she lives out of state and rarely visits, so today is a big deal, although…
-
Hallucinations
I’m new here. My spouse has been diagnosed with mild to moderate dementia. He is fairly independent; needs some supervision. Started Zyprexa and Aricept. Problem is with hallucinations. I really don’t know what to do or how to support. I’m talking to his doctor about this; but want to reach you for suggestions.
-
A very little holiday
Maybe I have done something stupid but after hearing ‘friends’ talking about their cruising on boats and various holidays I decided that for our birthdays which fall on the 8th and 9th and the reason why 55 years ago we went out together, that we should have a little holiday, thinking that may be this will be the last. So…
-
I cry every day. I don't know if I can go on like this. Too tired to seek help.
My DH is probably Stage 6. He gets agitated, angry, cursing at least a few times a day. Otherwise, he lies there watching TV. He wants to get out and then he doesn't. I'm taking care of him on my own. No kids or friends available nearby. I tried bringing in help but DH is very resistant and throws them out of the house. I…