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PWD Reading with a Tremor
Wondering if anyone has found a device of some sort that I can place a newspaper or magazine on so my DW can try to read. Her family has a genetic essential tremor and the dementia has made it worse from her. She's always liked reading magazines and the newpaper, but her hands shake too much now for her to hold it. If I…
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Choosing a MC
I put my DH in a MC in August of 2024. Once he was there he began to progress rapidly. Today he is mostly agitated and aggressive - they continue to try to find meds to help him. When I chose the MC he was in I really did not do my due diligence. I opted for the one he is in because it was close and the staff seemed to be…
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Update on bringing him home
I brought my DH home from MC a month ago, after he had been there for a year. So far it is going reasonably well. It's tiring and stressful, of course, but nowhere near as bad as it was a year ago. Between new meds and, probably, the progression of the disease, he is calmer and easier to redirect. He's usually sweet and…
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Distract/Defuse
Really in the weeds today. DW in an obsessive loop of anger about her iPad not working properly. Often happens because she gets lost in some obscure site. The tablet often keeps her occupied and happy, but it’s also a curse! Someone helped me with those “Absolutes” , but I’m really at a loss many times on how to get out of…
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Hallucinating
HI - I am new to this. My husband has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's. Yesterday he told me he saw a man outside our house and wanted to know who and why. In the back of his mind, he thinks I am seeing someone, which I would never do. I am with him almost 24/7 accept when I go to the market or run errands. When I do go, he…
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Act Normally as if Nothing is Wrong
My wife is a solid ALZ Stage 5. She can no longer cook, drive, use her computer, use a phone, repeats the same questions again and again, and many other things. She is totally dependent on me and she wants me to be with her 24/7. I can't leave her alone. However, through it all I have treated her as if nothing is wrong and…
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Foot amputation
My 71 yo DH is stage 6 and has lived in MC since Sept. 2024. In November, a podiatrist clipped his toenails. A few days later his big toe developed gangrene. I took him to the hospital's wound care center and they tried to clear up the gangrene with Santyl, but it didn't work. The gangrene spread down the toe. A Doppler…
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Gene Hackman's death
This is a sobering story for caregivers. We have to think about what would happen if something terrible happened to us, who would care for our loved one with dementia? Do you have anyone who checks on you regularly? I heard of one case in which the wife caregiver had a serious fall and broke something. She couldn't get to…
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And now cancer along with everything else
We have just been told that DH has renal cell carcinoma. We have a visit with a specialist in a few weeks. I really just want to know what the prognosis is for his cancer. He has many other health issues in addition to Alzheimer's, so I do not expect there to be a cancer treatment that would be warranted. I want him to be…
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Husband
I’m new here and desperately hopeful I can connect. It’s been about 7 years for my husband diagnoses and lately he is sleeping a lot, has trouble finding words and forgetting almost immediately. Not sure where to turn for information on his progression. Thank you in advance
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new to group
My DH was diagnosed 3 years ago with VD, he also has diabetes..When I look back, I know it started sooner. He is progressing and I am facing new challenges like driving, of course I have the keys but everyday he will ask.
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Leqembi infusions
We're looking into getting my DW on Leqembi infusions. Can anyone using this Med tell me if it works or causes more harm?
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Showers
My DW believes that she showers often but does not. Gets super offended when I mention it. Any thoughts on how to approach the topic?
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Grand tour
On My lunch break today went and visited the possible facility for my bf (45yo eoa, stage 6). I cried my whole drive there kept it together while walking up to the office then when asked how i could be helped the tears just fell. I did manage to get my words out. The lady who does the admissions was on lunch. Then as I was…
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Hygiene and related matters
looking for ideas about how to get my wife to wash her hair (or let me do it) and clip her nails. Once I can get that far I will move on to getting her to shower (am having shower chair and grip bars installed this week). She also refuses to let me bring in a physical therapist, even though she can barely walk up stairs…
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What do you do when you visit your loved one in MC?
I'm asking because there are times when I leave the MC feeling rather holow inside. Our son was here this week and he said he wished he could do something with his dad besides play rummy. He wanted to do something that would be meaningful for him. I understood since I have the same feelings at times. When I visit, we hug…
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how to shave a man?
DH has macular degeneration plus Alz, its increasingly hard for him to complete a really nice shave. He mostly only shaves once a week, that is OK, his whiskers are not thick and would never be a good beard. I'm looking for tips to help him and eventually take over the weekly cleanup. He uses basic razors, some of them…
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Overwhelmed
New to this discussion and hopeful for some assistance/direction, words of wisdom….my husband was recently diagnosed with EOAD, with lvppa variant. Went to 3 neurologists. Told he is in mild stage. Scored 19, 20 on MOCA. Had a silent stroke but don't know when….cognitive and some immediate memory issues prompted PCP visit…
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How to make the move from home to a facility.
Hi i am 39yo caring for my bf who is 45yo EOA. He has speech aphasia and i can understand him. The dr say he is stage 6 transitioning to stage 7. He is fully in depends now and sometimes tells me when he has to pee. He recently in the evenings (sundowning) has been saying "i need to go to school" i say he can go in the…
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New here
1. What is a DH? 2. I the husband is caring for wife
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First my DH, now my mother
As many of you know, my DH, Roger, died January 21. I was just beginning to come to terms with his death when I was dealt another blow this week, only 6-1/2 weeks after his death. My mother, who for the past 14 mos. was in memory care in our hometown 1000 miles away, died Friday afternoon (March 7). On February 24, she had…
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Vascular Dementia
Hello, I’m new to this group.. my husband 75 years old was diagnosed this past Dec 2024 of Vascular Dementia after having a MRI for memory loss.. last November he started not recognizing me or knowing my name, or where he was living, or how he got here, in which we have been married since 1982 & lived in the same residence…
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Necessity of a diagnosis
When we went to the neurologist and they did a 20 minute test on him and said that he’s in the normal range. That upsets me when we feel like we gained nothing and yet I know what’s going on at home. And then I think what’s the purpose of getting a diagnosis when all they’re gonna do is throw meds at him that aren’t very…
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Signs of changes...subtle or not??
Hello. My DH recently scored a 22/30 on MOCA. I don't see much change in that from months ago. I am seeing subtle things that are different and was wondering if anyone has any wisdom to share on what they may mean as far as progression. He is in the process of filing for FMLA/DI due to cognitive decline and the anxiety at…
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Forgot his age
A week ago DH knew he is 83. Today he thinks he is 60. He asked me how old I am. We happen to be the same age. He said he can’t believe he is 83. I told him it is ok he can be any age he wants to be and then asked him what age he would like to be. He responded age 3 because I wet my pants and other people can take care of…
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DH keeps coming out of his room naked!
My DH is in memory care, and at night especially, he comes out of his room naked. The staff will take him back to his room and put clothes on him, but he will do it again a short time later. I have noticed he is more anxious and agitated lately, but he has a heart condition that makes him unable to take the normal drugs…
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Our Last Mile
Well forum mates - friends, there have been many near-misses and false alarms on this long journey. My beloved DH has fooled us many times, or let's say trickster dementia has. Some of you will recall I saved his life at least a couple of times, knee-jerk reaction and loving instinct. And he was thought for sure to be in…
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First post
My DH always wants to “go home”. When I ask where, of course he says his childhood home. It is so exhausting to try to distract him from that thought. He goes to bed saying it and wakes up saying it. He begs and pleads with me to take him there. Constantly, p l e a s e! I can’t take him anywhere without arranging for…
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I did what I said I wouldn’t
After 60 years of marriage and in year 15 of caregiving I always have said I would never wipe my DH’s royal hiney. That never day came with you know what on the bathroom floors, toilet seat, etc. and on his royal hiney. After cleaning it up -including the royal hiney-I believe I deserve a super duper big gold star on my…
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Anyone experience a bone spur
My DH had an open sore between his toe. It healed but on his follow-up appt, his podiatrist took x-rays and saw two bone spurs. He suggested surgery to remove them, but he also said with the Alzheimer’s to deal with, we may want to do nothing. However, if the sore comes back, he’ll have 2 problems to deal with - an open…