-
Anger and anxiety
I am looking for ideas to help my DH deal with anger and anxiety. He is in the Moderate Stage. He seems to be jealous of me and our Grandchildren. He is taking Seroquel, but it might be making things worse.
-
Resentful and Losing patience
Truth, my DH and I had problems and about 10 years ago I asked him to leave and we moved to separate bedrooms. I became complacent, we shared the household expenses and eventually became friends and occasional travelling companions. I'd ask him to leave occasionally, he would say no, and that was it. No one with the…
-
Sleeping so much
My DH, age 75, is in stage 6 Alzheimer's. He is still physically in pretty good shape, just mentally compromised. In the last month he's been sleeping 18 - 20 hours per day. Is this common? Does this mark a step toward the end of this road? He always says he is tired. He eats well (often only one meal per day because he…
-
Betrayed
my lo knew he was having serious cognitive impairment. I knew long before he was willing to admit it and long before his law firm asked him to step down. He was aware enough to prepare legal action including DPOA of his finances. He named friends rather than me. I cannot even describe the nightmare that has ensued. He…
-
DW despondent and feels useless
DW used to be a college professor. She still thinks or hopes that faculty or students will come to the house (or, well, she's now in MC) for her advice and guidance. The fact that they don't (she's been retired for 13 years) makes her feel useless and despondent. She sometimes talks about death and doesn't see the point of…
-
Long overdue update
We hit the 3 year mark in MC a couple of months ago. It's been a 15 year trip with dementia so far. I know I posted here before about how I feel so "old" because this is typically a disease that hits older people. Managing end of life decisions and all that planning at 50 makes you feel old. Currently DH is 61, I'm 57. The…
-
My new tattoo
I’ve begun the process of touring memory care facilities and the costs are sometimes just ridiculous. Today I visited a nice place, not grand but nice. The price for a private room in MC was $12,245 with an additional fee of $600 per month for incontinence. So I’ve decided I should tattoo that total on my wrist so I can…
-
Long Geri-Psych Stay!
At the end of last month/beginning of this month, I posted that DH had a complete mental breakdown at his rehab center, where he was recovering from a fractured tibia. He was transferred to the local ER. Here's the update: After 2 days in the ER, on April 2, he was transferred to an inpatient Geri Psych facility. He's…
-
Reminders that don't remind.
My spouse is at the point where she functions normally for most things: caring for herself and the house, driving, shopping, vising friends, etc. We create a to-do list every day, and although it's right in front of her, she doesn't follow it. She understands its importance, and knows that it's there, but doesn't do any of…
-
Updating 602A Report Annually
Here in CA it appears MCFs are required by law to have residents' 602A doctor's report updated annually. Currently, with the addition of Depakote it would appear on paper that DH seems highly functioning and doesn't need memory care. I suppose the only ADLs he can't do is cook meals, drive, and that he requires supervision…
-
Constant eating
My DH eats constantly. He goes to the refrigerator every 10 minutes. Is there a medication I can ask the doctor about to help with this? He has been on palliative hospice care for about six weeks. Any help would be appreciated.
-
Just need to talk to my friends (204)
Time to begin segment 2O4 of our thread. Thought this would be a good time before morning posts. GG, if you stew the prunes, they won't be shriveled. My day was good. I may take Stormy for a ride everyday. the enjoys it so much. I need to get a pair of safety glasses for him. He likes to ride with the window down. This is…
-
17 Months in Care
I'm sure this has been discussed... my wife has been in residential care for over 17 months now. Her main deficit is short term memory loss. Incontinence, doesn't walk. Predominantly in bed except for hospice showers, there is sooo much more to this. She was a registered nurse, bright, still sweet in so many ways. I see…
-
I just have got P.O.A for husband - how or if to communicate - any ideas?
My husband is still pretty "with it", spends lots of money at yard sales and has accounts at building supply stores. Yesterday I got POA and feel terrible - he will go ballistic when he finds out and I am looking for the least ballistic way of working with this and wonder if anyone has any ideas? I am going to the bank…
-
Weight loss in late stage
My DH is late stage 6/early stage 7 and under hospice care. From the first of March to the first of April he lost 3 lbs. I weighed him yesterday and since the first of April he has lost 6 lbs. He is eating what I give him at meals and I make him a milkshake nearly every day and always give him snacks as well, but is still…
-
Hospice qualification
Thanks to all of you who responded to my recent request for information about hospice. I took your advice and worked with his doctor, and yesterday he qualified. It isn't about how long he will live, since no one knows that, but about his level of compromise. Even though nothing has happened yet, I feel immensely relieved…
-
Learning to live with the sadness
That's what I was thinking about driving home from MC today. DH has been in MC for 15 months and I am still so very lonely at times that I start crying. I thought he was adjusting well after a rough time last summer. The last two times I have visited however he has asked to come home. It broke my heart when he said, " I…
-
Cell phone
My DW is 70, diagnosed with Alzheimer’s about 10 months ago, but looking back, it’s been a few years. I think she is stage 3 or 4, but, I don’t know what to do about her cellphone. She has given out too much info to scam callers who have sold it to other scammers. I put her phone on “silence unknown callers” , but she gets…
-
Struggling with Refusals for Doctor appointments
DH has become livid and screaming and throwing things when I notify him of another appointment. I have been very conscience of limiting the unnecessary appointments, but this time it is the Neurologist. I am sure it is partially fear, but I do not know how to help him feel like it will be OK and the doctor is there to help…
-
Anosognosia Challenge
This is just a vent. I am NOT asking for advice or tips. But I would like to read about your experiences with this caregiver challenge. My DH with mild/moderate dementia thinks the meds he takes will cure his “small” issues. While he admits to some short term memory loss, he rejects my determinations that he should not…
-
What to say.
Yesterday my DW said if she would die tomorrow I would be happy because I would be free of her and her problems. I know this is the disease talking, but it is hard to understand. Does she think I don't love ? How do y'all handle this ? Thanks.
-
First Post
I’ve been following along for months now and decided it’s time to jump in. My DH is 68 and was diagnosed with EOAD and logopenic progressive aphasia. His latest neurology visit in December had him in stage 5, but I think he’s probably been dipping into stage 6 for a few months now. We’ve been married 40 years and needless…
-
Subacute rehab vent
My DH Is in a subacute rehab after having his toes and part of his foot amputated due to gangrene. He is not supposed to put weight on his foot until the doctor gives the ok. Last Friday night while sundowning, he got out of bed, walked into the next room and fell. He cut his arm and has a big bruise, but nothing else. The…
-
Importance of connection for caregivers
Just thought I would share a recent experience. My DH bounces back and forth between stage 4 and 5-mostly five. We recently took a car trip to visit family and he handled the car ride very well which surprised me. While we were there he had a really bad night where he was extremely confused(more than normal), extreme temp…
-
CBD to help manage symptoms
Any one have experience with CBD to help manage anxiety and agitation in your loved ones?
-
Talking to who knows
My DW spends a good part of her day talking to people who I have no idea who they are. This is all in her mind as we are the only ones present. Is this a normal act of Alzheimer’s? Is it considered delusional or hallucinations? Should I be concerned about it and call the neurologist? Is there medications that help? I’m at…
-
Home care, will this work or not ?
Through this journey I have realized several things . 1 . Don't set your expectations high . 2 . Throw out everything that made sense to you at one time . 3 . Seek as much help as you can . 4 . Last but not least stop feeling guilty when you didn't succeed in getting your loved one to do any of the things that come with…
-
DW does not want to see a sister
My DW is 62 and has been living with AZ for the last 7 years. In the last 4 weeks she has become extremely agitated by the mere mention of her sisters name. We don’t understand why and the sister was obviously very upset although I think she understands my wife cannot help it. I was hoping that it was an aberration but the…
-
The Cavalry Is Not Coming: 9 Year Edition
This is an updated version of The Cavalry Is Not Coming. I repost this occasionally as I have been informed that this article has helped many caregivers. This edition is mostly the same, although I have brought it up to date and revised it to make it more helpful. October 1, 2024 marked nine years since my wife’s dementia…
-
Lewy bodies(1)
My husband was diagnosed 5 years ago with Alzheimer’s. Now we have been told he has Lewy Bodies with Parkinson. He is taking Depakote and Seroquel. Has anyone had this to happen and medication?