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Contesting my mom's will.
My sister told me about how family members fight over the will. I've been naive thinking black and white and that the will is going to be carried out as intended by my mom.
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How to reduce phone calls and text messages
My mom moved in with us 3 months ago. She has always had problems with confidence and has needed reassurance even before ALZ. Now that she is living here with MCI, it is so much worse. I work from home as a mental health registered nurse and frequently am in virtual meetings on camera where I need to participate. I also…
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ZERO short term memory
My mom is 80 with moderate to severe (per Neuro) ALZ. She has no short term memory at all it’s not even 1 minute it’s just gone. She eats obsessively because she says no one gave her anything to eat. she actually ate 6 donuts and an entire package of large sized cookies and still wanted more. My sister was watching her and…
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Cataract surgery
Mom is probably to the end of stage 4. She was diagnosed with vascular dementia 2 years ago. I was told average life expectancy is 5 years. I know that’s just a rough number. She has diabetes with edema in her legs. I don’t think she could follow a storyline to read a book. She is able to choose her meals off the menu at…
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Getting care for my father
I moved my father into my home in January 2024, due to his progressing dementia. He was living with my step mom, who also, due to a health problem, has since moved in with her own children. I am struggling to understand how long-term Medicaid works. I work full-time and I am not able to quit or retire, but I don't want to…
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Tramadol Question
Hi All - So my mom is in assisted living on Hospice care for over a year now. She is in a Broda chair and they now use a Hoyer lift getting her into bed/shower etc. She is down to 95 pounds. I would say late stage 5 or early 6. She has been taking Tramadol 2x a day (morning and night). A Hospice nurse called and said that…
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My sister has POA-medical. But we need DPOA for my mom, who has moderate Alzheimer's.
My mom can't make her own medical decisions due to advancing Alzheimer's. Right now my sister only has HIPPA-level access to my mom's medical info per the existing POA, which was drawn up years ago when she just had mild cog impairment as a dx . Do we need anything beyond a doctor's letter (or two?) and an eldercare lawyer…
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Mom is getting worse
She sleeps all the time, my family when they visit they wake her up to feed her. Then she goes to sleep. When I see her,all I see is pain and anguish in her eyes. I feel her pain and she says it with her eyes why am I alive? I seriously would have taken her off her medications and stopped feeding her years ago but my hands…
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Angry right now
Anyone out there ever get frustrated to the point of even being angry at the total LACK of answers available for this disease? My mom is in (I think) Stage 4 Alzheimers. But then it could be Stage 5. I can’t get a good answer from a doctor. There are no good answers. No good answers on how long I can expect each stage to…
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Pill box questions
My father is still living on his own about 15-20 min away from myself and my siblings. Our mother passed away in December and he's getting adjusted. My sister bought him an electronic pill container with an alarm. She fills it once a week for him. He's still self sufficient and refuses to go into a facility of any kind…
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Post-hospital exhaustion for caregiver?
My father was in the hospital for two days last week. Admitted through the ER. There’s a lot to say about that—especially about the shocking lack of training by doctors to deal with a patient who has dementia—but right now I am looking for advice for myself. I was with him almost constantly in the hospital (it was…
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So many emotions
Hi All, I am reading so many posts that I can relate to and empathize with as the adult daughter of a 91 yo father with dementia. Mom just passed away in May and on June 30 I moved Dad to assisted living. He cannot be home alone and was constantly "looking for" lost keys, wallet, hearing aids, checkbook, or searching for…
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Help with anger response
looking for help with ways to respond when mom is angry. It has gotten worse (tested for UTI and increasing 1 medication ) and I don’t know how to respond. It is “I want out of here” or “why can’t I go somewhere else” or “I just want to die” or “what do they want, they keep going through my things” or “that person is a…
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In Home care recommendations
Mom is diagnosed with dementia. We need some in home help and want to go with an agency but it's hard to know where to start. Looking for any recommendations you all have for in home agencies. We don't need a lot yet but will need more soon I think. Companionship, light meals and respite for her partner- the full time…
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Is this Stage 5 and to what degree?
My mom last week recognized me but didn't think of me as a daughter but maybe a cousin when I asked who do you think I am? Later in the day she kept asking what my relationship was to my brother. If I knew my Dad - I think she forgot about my Dad until we started going down memory lane. She was glad to know my dad was at…
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What has changed in a year and a half
Greetings all. In September 2023, I moved both my parents into my home. My dear mom has Alzheimer's. My dear dad has mild cognitive impairment. They are 85 and 87 respectively. For more background, see the discussion at https://alzconnected.org/discussion/64542/moving-my-folks-into-my-house#latest btw - I copied and pasted…
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Cataract surgery with dementia
New here…. and I am finding this forum very helpful. My mom is 85 and is blind in one eye and they are recommending cataract surgery for her good eye. She is definitely in mid stage of dementia. I scheduled this procedure for her and am nervous if I am doing the right thing. The surgery will take 10 minutes and I will be…
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“Borrowing” memories that aren’t their own?
My mom lives with us and has for a little over a year (moved from one part of a very large state to a very very much different part of the state, very far in distance even if driving in one day). She has twice brought up “I remember when…” memories of events she wasn’t here for but that we had gone to and described or…
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Not sure what to do anymore
My mother has dementia that has not officially been diagnosed because she refuses to cooperate with any doctors or complete any testing. I believe she has vascular dementia due to her consistently dangerously high blood pressures (that she refuses to take meds for, which are prescribed) and a CAT Scan showed damage, but no…
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Caregiving help for a parent - what has worked well for you?
My brother and I care 24/7 for a mom with ALZ, probably middle stage. We both work full time, but my brother is able to work from home, so that is the only way we have been able to manage it. We have both developed chronic health problems, probably from the years of stress as we have been managing Mom's care for several…
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MIL with dementia
My first time posting. My husband and I are the primary caregivers for his parents who live in their own house next door. Mom is 83 with vascular dementia and Dad is 86 with Alzheimer’s. Mom is getting more and more agitated. They still love playing game and cards but if mom doesn’t get her way she becomes very mean to me.…
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New to caregiving for self-centered husband
My husband was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer's and vascular dimentia, although I have seen the progression for many years. My hardest times are when he doesn't recognize me as his wife. He says I can't drive the cars because I am not on his insurance, he says he is single and doesn't want anyone living with him, that I…
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New to this and looking for any advice!
Hello everyone, My mom has all the symptoms of Alzheimer’s but is very stubborn and living in denial and doesn’t want to admit she has a problem and her symptoms are getting worse and worse affecting both of our lives daily. I am in my early 20’s and an only child who is trying to care for her mom but I’m limited in what I…
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Mobility concern
Hello everyone. My mother is 75 years old and was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and vascular dementia officially in 2020. Lately, my mom has been needing more help with walking around the house. Last week, she fell in the bathroom; she was looking in the mirror and just fell backwards. I’ve also noticed that she leans to her…
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Dad has sudden incontinence
My dad who is mid-stage LBD has been wearing Depends since late 2023 although he hasn't really needed them, it is simply easier for both him and his caregivers. He could always verbalize when he needs to go and if he wasn't a fall risk, could toilet independently. He was started on Doxycycline for a stye recently and after…
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The day of the toddler
I went to my mom’s MC today just after lunch had been cleared from the table. Here is the conversation we had: Me: did you have lunch? Mom: no. Me: are you hungry? Mom: yes. ( I then checked with a reliable staff member in the room who told me she had eaten her entire lunch, including ice cream for dessert.) Me: let's go…
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New to this
Hello! This is the first time I have reached out about taking care of my Mom. She is diagnosed with Alzheimer's and probably has been dealing with it for about 2 or 3 years. She moved in with me back in January. She decided she just couldnt do it alone anymore. It has been a huge change for all of us. I have 2 adult…
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Sleeping issue
Hello, I am new here. My sister, brother and I are taking care of my mom. She was just diagnosed and is on 2 different medicines to help with her memory. My sister sees my mom more regularly than I do, but my mom went to my sister's today, and my sister could tell my mom was off. My mom said she had trouble sleeping last…
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Nobody can be relied on. Nobody.
The doctor’s office dropped the ball… again… in a way that made things so much harder. Long story short, the way my mom found out she has to give up driving was by getting a letter from the state. No breaking it to her gently. I am finally learning that when caring for someone with this disease there is literally NOBODY…
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Worried about Mom’s Memory
My mom is 73 and she is forgetful. Meaning she forgets to charge her phone at night, get up and out the door for appointments first thing in the morning. Never sets alarms to get up. Forgets her purse and phone when she leaves the house. She sees a neurologist where we live and had been tested for Alzheimer’s by blood test…