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LGBTQ Eldery Father community
Hello my father was just recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s via MRI Amyloid scan. Its still early stages but as we know the eventual progression as he decided, which my sisters are aligned on, to not test the brain infusion treatments which only recently have been approved, we want to try as best we can to speak now about…
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Hallucinating and cussing at everything
Hello my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s dementia about 4 years ago we have noticed lately she is hallucinating a lot and wakes up cussing at anything and everything and constantly yelling and saying I hate you,I hope you die, I’m going to kill you , and throwing out racial slurs . But more recently she took a fall…
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The denial worsens
Hi, new to the group. My Dad was diagnosed 3 years ago. My Mom is showing early signs and we know we are in early stages. She is currently a caregiver. After a Doctor visit, it was determined she has memory loss but stage unknown. Bloodwork and MRI. She refuses to do anything. The MRI is scheduled for this Sunday. There is…
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Parent getting meaner, no joy left
I am new to this forum and new to learning about Alzheimer's. My dad has had a steady memory decline but it finally was diagnosed as Alzheimer's. Recently I've noticed things have gotten way worse. Nearly every time we visit, the tension builds and he has an angry outburst directed at my boyfriend. This time he took a…
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Newly Diagnosed and I have questions
Hello this is my first time posting and I have questions. Of course I didn't think of these while we were in the doctors office today and won't be back until Oct. Anyways, my mom was just diagnosed with Alzheimer's today and was told to take 2 different medications. They are memantine and donepezil. My first question is…
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NHTD waiver for my Mom living with me Stage 6 Alzheimer’s
hi everyone, I’m pretty new on this forum especially posting a discussion so I’m not really sure if I’m doing this correctly. I live in upstate New York and I am my mom’s soul care provider. I moved my mother into my home eight months ago and I’m still trying to tap into NHTD waiver services in our area. Is there anyone…
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Plan B
Hi guys! Again, I am so eternally grateful to have found this group. I have learned so much in a short space of time. One of the biggest lessons learned is that a pwd can live 15-20 years with this vile disease. Anyone who has interacted with me before, knows that in December, my DM was diagnosed with MCI/Early Dementia.…
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Alexa assistance
Good morning! I am new to this community. My father, who lives in Florida, was diagnosed last fall with Mild Cognitive Impairment. Upon further testing, it was determined Alzheimers related. I'm in Wisconsin. He lives independently, but has a partner he spends his days with. He does not live with her. She is 85 and has…
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Paradoxical Lucidity
Over the past couple of weeks, my mother has declined rapidly. After another evaluation from a different provider, she qualified for hospice this time. She's incontinent, refusing to eat regularly, and sleeping most of the day now. Her ambulation has become more unstable with the shuffling gait so common with dementia. I…
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Memory Care closing
I received notice today that my mother’s memory care facility is permanently closing. She moved in September 2024 and has finally started to learn her way around and trust the staff I am angry and stressed. I know a move will not be good for her. And I am alarmed by this change. Is anyone else going through these sudden…
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Hygiene Issues
Recently my MIL has developed hygiene issues to the point she has a bad odor. She had given up using her walk-in tub and was doing a good job washing up in the sink. But within the last 2 weeks or so she hasn't been washing up and it's noticeable. Her use of antiperspirant doesn't help. She also isn't brushing her teeth or…
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Much Worse in Last Two Weeks
First post. My father died 21 months ago, and my mother was unable to care for herself due to declining health. She wanted to go to an assisted living facility, as she didn’t expect me to be able to take her in and meet her needs. This was and is true. Things started out rocky, as she would call me all times of the…
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Paranoia and delusions in AL
Hi all. My 84 yr old mother has exhibited paranoia for the past several years so I would say her Alzheimer's only exacerbates it. A year ago she moved to AL. She is not happy there (this place is crazy nice). She calls me daily yelling that staff are coming in her apartment at night using her coffee maker. This has been…
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Things are rough.
Moved my mom in a couple of weeks ago on the advice of her doc, who she used to love, but now refuses to go see. Said he only suggested because he and I were “in cahoots.” He said she needs to stop driving and let me help with meds. We “lost” her car keys during the move, but she has been obsessed looking for them for…
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Managing care
Hello, first post here. I am my dad's daughter and medical/durable POA. He has mid-stage LBD. He is physically pretty healthy except for chronic UTIs which we finally have managed. He is in a wonderful RCF with a nurse on staff and loving caregivers that adore him. But lately it seems like so many little things are…
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Garbled speech
Curious about garbled speech and wandering. Mom’s in MC, probably stage 6. Miraculously, her moods are good and she’s extremely well taken care of. The past few months I’ve noticed her speech is more garbled. She frequently uses mashed up words, and most sentences don’t make sense. She’ll repeat syllables almost like a…
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Contesting my mom's will.
My sister told me about how family members fight over the will. I've been naive thinking black and white and that the will is going to be carried out as intended by my mom.
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How to reduce phone calls and text messages
My mom moved in with us 3 months ago. She has always had problems with confidence and has needed reassurance even before ALZ. Now that she is living here with MCI, it is so much worse. I work from home as a mental health registered nurse and frequently am in virtual meetings on camera where I need to participate. I also…
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ZERO short term memory
My mom is 80 with moderate to severe (per Neuro) ALZ. She has no short term memory at all it’s not even 1 minute it’s just gone. She eats obsessively because she says no one gave her anything to eat. she actually ate 6 donuts and an entire package of large sized cookies and still wanted more. My sister was watching her and…
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Cataract surgery
Mom is probably to the end of stage 4. She was diagnosed with vascular dementia 2 years ago. I was told average life expectancy is 5 years. I know that’s just a rough number. She has diabetes with edema in her legs. I don’t think she could follow a storyline to read a book. She is able to choose her meals off the menu at…
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Getting care for my father
I moved my father into my home in January 2024, due to his progressing dementia. He was living with my step mom, who also, due to a health problem, has since moved in with her own children. I am struggling to understand how long-term Medicaid works. I work full-time and I am not able to quit or retire, but I don't want to…
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Tramadol Question
Hi All - So my mom is in assisted living on Hospice care for over a year now. She is in a Broda chair and they now use a Hoyer lift getting her into bed/shower etc. She is down to 95 pounds. I would say late stage 5 or early 6. She has been taking Tramadol 2x a day (morning and night). A Hospice nurse called and said that…
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My sister has POA-medical. But we need DPOA for my mom, who has moderate Alzheimer's.
My mom can't make her own medical decisions due to advancing Alzheimer's. Right now my sister only has HIPPA-level access to my mom's medical info per the existing POA, which was drawn up years ago when she just had mild cog impairment as a dx . Do we need anything beyond a doctor's letter (or two?) and an eldercare lawyer…
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Mom is getting worse
She sleeps all the time, my family when they visit they wake her up to feed her. Then she goes to sleep. When I see her,all I see is pain and anguish in her eyes. I feel her pain and she says it with her eyes why am I alive? I seriously would have taken her off her medications and stopped feeding her years ago but my hands…
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Angry right now
Anyone out there ever get frustrated to the point of even being angry at the total LACK of answers available for this disease? My mom is in (I think) Stage 4 Alzheimers. But then it could be Stage 5. I can’t get a good answer from a doctor. There are no good answers. No good answers on how long I can expect each stage to…
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Pill box questions
My father is still living on his own about 15-20 min away from myself and my siblings. Our mother passed away in December and he's getting adjusted. My sister bought him an electronic pill container with an alarm. She fills it once a week for him. He's still self sufficient and refuses to go into a facility of any kind…
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Post-hospital exhaustion for caregiver?
My father was in the hospital for two days last week. Admitted through the ER. There’s a lot to say about that—especially about the shocking lack of training by doctors to deal with a patient who has dementia—but right now I am looking for advice for myself. I was with him almost constantly in the hospital (it was…
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So many emotions
Hi All, I am reading so many posts that I can relate to and empathize with as the adult daughter of a 91 yo father with dementia. Mom just passed away in May and on June 30 I moved Dad to assisted living. He cannot be home alone and was constantly "looking for" lost keys, wallet, hearing aids, checkbook, or searching for…
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Help with anger response
looking for help with ways to respond when mom is angry. It has gotten worse (tested for UTI and increasing 1 medication ) and I don’t know how to respond. It is “I want out of here” or “why can’t I go somewhere else” or “I just want to die” or “what do they want, they keep going through my things” or “that person is a…
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In Home care recommendations
Mom is diagnosed with dementia. We need some in home help and want to go with an agency but it's hard to know where to start. Looking for any recommendations you all have for in home agencies. We don't need a lot yet but will need more soon I think. Companionship, light meals and respite for her partner- the full time…