-
Transistioning to Memory Care/Assisted Living
Hello - my mom was diagnosed with vascular dementia/alzheimer's last spring - but she had been having memory issues for a couple years now. We finally got my dad on board with moving them into an assisted living center in December of last year - he was older and falling quite a bit himself and we felt he needed more care…
-
Mom with Parkinson’s dementia LTC guilt
Hello. This is my first time posting. My Mom is in LTC. She’s been there 6 months after a fall. She guilts me and wants me to let her go home. She cried today because she doesn’t think she belongs there. Her bf is wanting her to go back home too, though he complained when she lived in the home about how difficult it was.…
-
New territory with vascular dementia
Hello! My mom just turned 96. As both my husband and I work full time (and all my siblings are out of the area), we helped mom sell her house two years ago to move to a brand new assisted living community in the same town, 8 minutes from our house. She had cognitive impairment, was forgetting her meds, not paying bills,…
-
Fear and refusal of standing/transfers?
Prefacing with my mom seems to be in the later stages. She recently does not want to get up or stand up. In the morning, she will not want to sit up in bed. Once we get her in a sitting position, she is refusing to stand up. She would rather just sit there. When we get her up with a gait belt, she gets very angry and…
-
Struggling to make this all work
My dad died in October and that seemed to just pressure cook the dementia into mom....She makes little to no sense when she talks, is aggressive towards my grandkids, tells me and everyone who will listen she hates my m-i-l, who also lives with us, but they chit chat all day, is snarky to my husband, refuses to pick up…
-
Giving up outside appointments
How long has anyone been able to keep up routine dental care for your PWD? I have actually been taking my mom for cleanings every 3 months, on the advice of the dentist since she doesn't do a good job with brushing. Staff at her MC are supposed to assist her, but I think it happens in a hit or miss fashion depending on…
-
New challenge
My dad just recently started saying that there are men in his house. He tells us where they are standing, but doesn't say he knows who they are. So far they have been in the bathroom and living room. Has anyone else experienced this with their love one?
-
She’s begging me to move in
My mom received the letter from the doctor telling her not to drive anymore. At least I am no longer the bad guy. But obviously she is devastated. And I think finally seeing that she can’t live alone 2.5 hours away from me anymore. We have a spot in AL near me reserved for her. But now she is BEGGING me to move in with me…
-
Good day has me questioning my sanity
I’m at my mom’s and she has been so normal and seemingly fine all day, I’m starting to question my sanity. She cleaned her house before I came, she cleaned out all the expired food from her fridge, she did all the laundry…. Hard to believe this is the same woman who one week ago forgot how her son was related to her……
-
Desperately seeking housing
For those that read my first post, you know what I've gone through, and now I'm trying to locate housing for myself after spending seven years caring for my mother with alzheimer's. I'm trying to find a room for rent or a kitchenette in the Bryan/College Station, Texas area. If you can help, please reach out to me. Thank…
-
The time has come-transitioning mom from AL to MC
I'm at a loss with my emotions and smarts. My mom's AL nurse called today to let me know that they ran a few tests and screenings, and my mom scored low across the board. The staff has been monitoring her and is seeing a noticeable decline with her memory, increased confusion, and also depression (mostly loneliness and…
-
NHTD waiver for my Mom living with me Stage 6 Alzheimer’s
hi everyone, I’m pretty new on this forum especially posting a discussion so I’m not really sure if I’m doing this correctly. I live in upstate New York and I am my mom’s soul care provider. I moved my mother into my home eight months ago and I’m still trying to tap into NHTD waiver services in our area. Is there anyone…
-
Should possible sudden delirium(?) change our plans?
Hi. Does anyone have experience with delirium or psychosis that came and went after a major life disruption? We are feeling desperate right now! It is regarding my husband’s parents (Sally 84, Fino 93). Background: They have refused to move to an AL over the years, and with some outside assistance, have managed to stay in…
-
What to do with all the empty space when their journey ends?
I know this question has been posted before. However, when your loved one's journey has ended, what do you then do with all the spare time and energy you gave to them? My mother is in hospice now. I talked with hospice and arranged for a priest to visit her. It was not planned, but as I was entering my mother's MC…
-
"Survivor's" Guilt
I find that in addition to feeling guilty for the pain I am causing my mom by taking away her independence, I feel a form of "survivor's" guilt, in that it is very hard for me to allow myself to enjoy basically ANYTHING. I feel guilty feeling happy when I know she is struggling with so much (grief at the loss of her…
-
My father is convinced my mom is cheating (?)
Hello I am new to the group, and an unsure how to handle this issue. My father was diagnosed over a year ago, and IDK how to label his current progression. He is isolating, and unsteady of feet, has some issues with incontinence. Has difficulty following a movie or tv program. But he is still aware of who family are. He…
-
Wit’s end
My widowed mom lives alone and is extremely stubborn and resistant to help. I’m an only child, and like many here, I’m also a working professional and a mom of teenagers. My mom’s memory and behaviors are steadily getting worse, and she also has anxiety. She’s manipulative and often passive aggressive with me, and she’s a…
-
Sparring with Cousin
My dad is dying after a 2 year cancer battle. Mom has always had anxiety and some depression though masked both well. She is admitting herself for quite a while that she cannot do things. Cooking was classically the first. Decision making is not good and while ultimately my dad wasn't going to get cured, her cognitive…
-
Juggling changes (driving, moving) with grief
My 84-year-old Mom lost her husband of 60 years — my dad — just 2.5 months ago. She is really grieving hard. So we are hesitant to add more unwanted changes to her life just yet. The problem is, we believe she is around Stage 3 or 4…. (Doctor just did MMES and she scored 24 out of 30, which was just below normal but we…
-
Hyper Focus Help
I have been looking after my 89 Y.O. Mother trying to keep her in her home and have been quite successful for the last 6 years. However, this last year she has been turning against the caregivers that we have gotten to help me with looking after her. I have noticed that there are 2 Moms that I am dealing with - one being…
-
How to Discuss Mental State
Hello. My mom moved in with me in October because she knew she could no longer live alone. I realized when she moved in that her memory loss and confusion had progressed much further than I thought. Recently, she has gotten into arguments with medical personnel and others when she is confused and doesn't understand what…
-
Help me, I really messed up
Ever since my mother's stupid eye doctor told her she was okay to drive, she has been RELENTLESS. She won't drive unless I give her my blessing (thankfully), but it is so bad. In our daily phone call today, she yelled and swore at me the whole time, wanted to know why I insisted on treating her like a baby, why I don't…
-
We can’t afford care for my mom
Hello, My mom was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. She’s only 63, so we are highly unprepared for this. To make matters worse, she has very little money saved and my family is not a position to help financially. She also lives in CA while I’m in WA state adding more hurdles to finding her adequate help. We’ve set up…
-
Dad passed away
My dad died on Friday. He had memory issues that went unnoticed or swept under the rug for several years. He had knee replacement surgery in January. I stayed with him for a week and then my brother stayed the next week. It became quite apparent that he wasn’t safe to be by himself so he came to stay with me “until his PT…
-
Mom newly diagnosed
My 79 year old mom was officially diagnosed with frontotemperal dementia on March 5. Putting a name to her condition is helpful, but devastating at the same time. How can I as her 56 year old daughter be a help to her and my Dad at this stage, where her symptoms are getting worse, but she's still pretty functional. I'm the…
-
I’m worried
Hello, I’m here because my dad recently got diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s. Everyone says “at least it’s early and there’s awhile”.. but we never really know how quickly this disease can progress. I’m worried, I’m going to lose my dad at some point. And I feel guilty too for feeling like my life is going to be…
-
Showtiming
Anybody have experience with this. My dad presents well, extremely well, you gotta spend enough time to know he has Dementia. He studies for what ppl may ask, watch tv to stay updated, and if he lacks the energy to perform he just stays quiet. He wants to return to much younger gf and friends who were exploiting and…
-
I am new
This is my first post here. My mother was diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment most likely due to Alzheimer's about a year ago. She lives alone and I also live alone about half an hour away from her. I have no siblings. My mother firmly does not believe she has Alzheimer's and she does everything possible to hide it.…
-
The driving discussion
I know you are not supposed to rationalize and explain with someone who has anosognosia, but what kinds of things can I say to appease my mom, who has become OBSESSED with driving again, especially when she asks why her 3 friends who invite her to lunch can drive themselves but she can’t? Her eye doctor told her earlier…
-
Any advice on severe emotional hysteria?
My mom was diagnosed with early onset Posterior Cortical Atrophy (a form of Alzheimer's) around 2 years ago. She is only 59. She has been going through a pretty rapid decline and we ended up moving her into assisted living last year. Obviously this has been tough on her and it's been an emotional roller coaster, but she…