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Balance
My DH is 25 year older than I am. He is 94, I am 69. I've known this was coming for about 15 years. Early years were challenging, but COVID was the hammer that drove nails into the structure of our lives. I moved him into a MC about a year ago. I was dealing with other "stuff" at the (my brother was killed in an automobile…
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I’m new
Im new to group chats and im new to my dad having dementia, im not new to dementia i did at home health care when I worked and i thought if my parents needed me to care for them i would b a pro but dementia is the worst disease. My dad is 65 and lived a very healthy life and that made him happy but I’m like my mom I just…
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Dad confused in his apartment - looking for stairs that don't exist
I'm looking for suggestions / tips about how to address my dad's search for stairs to go to his other apartment. He is 92, in a wheelchair - probably Stage 5 Alzheimers. He lives in a Memory Care facility in a studio apartment. He keeps looking for the stairs from the basement or to the 2nd floor to get to his "other"…
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Parents Against Me
Has anyone else experienced their parents completely turning on them? My parents were both narcissistic before dementia, and it’s been a nightmare since the disease progressed. I moved them out of their unsafe house with stairs, brought them across the country to be closer to family, and got them into assisted living…
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My Mom Died November 1st
Hi everybody, I have been reading these posts for years. My mom had Alzheimer’s for about 15 years. 3 years ago, my father died and I took over the caregiving for my mom. She was bedridden for those 3 years. But she was the sweetest little lady. She had forgotten who I was, but she gave me kisses everyday. She died on…
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Where are we at here?
I have these questions, and no one can just give me a straight answer. My mom (66years old) was diagnosed with ALZ, in 2022. I guess we can call it EO because she was 63 years old at the time of diagnosis. She has type 1 Diabetes and last month she was put into hospice at home. She was hospitalized Oct 17 for her blood…
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Where are we at here?
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Hoping I’m doing the best for my dad.
Hello all. I’m a new member here. I’ve been caring for my dad for nearly 15 years now. He went from being my rock to depending on me for everything. I am 1 of 6 living children that my dad has. My mother passed 22 years ago then my eldest brother a year after her. I am the baby of the girls. I have 3 older sisters and 2…
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Weighted blanket
Hi. My father has been restless at night and waking up. I tried a weighted blanket last night and it seems to help a little. He did wake up once but wasn't as agitated as he usually is. It seemed easier to get him back to bed. Does anyone find this helps? It's been a couple of months of disruptive sleeping. I am trying…
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New here
Hello I'm new here. My mom has Alzheimer's and is stage 5 with a little 6. I had to move her in with me a few months ago as living independently became too difficult. I'm struggling with my sense of loss of my independence having to be caregiver for her. I plan to check out a nearby nursing facility that has an all female…
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Insurance question
Mom has had Medicare and through dads retirement benefits blue cross and blue shield. Her coverage has always been very good and she has seldom had out of pocket costs. She has recently moved to a nursing home. She has been approved for Medicaid. The nursing home is suggesting she sign up for a Medicare part b (I think…
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Guardian-family angry at my decisions
I have been a guardian for 5 years. We make very difficult decisions daily. Family members always think it is their right to tell me my decisions are wrong. I always ask prior for professional advice. My person has not asked for their wedding ring. I have been told to not give valuables to your loved one. Yet family…
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Feeling upset
I am new here. Mom's 78 with Dementia & Diabetic going on 4 yrs now. The agitation is the worst. Today she wonder off. I had officer friendly contact me to find her. She took a bus and got lost. She is on meds but I'm like is it making it worse. I am exhausted of all this drama. Nursing home is not even an option. Long…
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Stuff animals with Dementia
I am curious to find if anyone has a parent who plays with dolls or teddy bears. Mom's lives with me and thinks the teddy bear is her baby. She will feed it real food and share her drinks with it. She calls the baby by my siblings names. And it goes everywhere with her in a cart. I was ok with it until she gets angry…
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How did you decide who lives with who?
Looking for tips on what should be considered when deciding to move a loved one in with you, or if you should move in with them. We have a list of pros, cons and costs for each. but we keep flip flopping on what is "best". For example, if she moves in with us, she will have 2 small rooms. we will need to remodel the…
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Questions for the neurologist & Can we keep it a secret for now?
Hi everyone, We have an upcoming appointment with a neurologist — it will be our first since we received confirmation that my mom has AD, based on a recent PET CT Amyloid scan. I’d appreciate advice on what questions to ask during the visit. I expect we’ll discuss medications, side effects, and general care planning. One…
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Memory care-Taking all clothes out of drawers
My mother is in interim memory care, and is constantly taking the dirty clothes out of the hamper before the staff can get to them and unpacks ALL her drawers and closet and folds it on her bed. I have tried giving her other things to organize (costume jewlery/photos) but she keeps coming back to the clothing. 1) Has…
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Is a formal diagnosis needed?
How important is a formal diagnosis? My best guess is she's stage 4 or 5 from what I read. but does ALZ vs dementia, vs old age really matter? she is 82, still living on her own, though that needs to change very soon. she no longer drives, and the most recent development is her losing track of her phone, not knowing how to…
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Recent diagnosis and vision trouble
My dad was just recently diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's at age 63. While his memory is a little spotty, the toughest thing he's been dealing with is an increasing loss of vision that they believe is being caused by some small bleeds in the occipital lobe of his brain. He is still almost completely self-sufficient,…
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I don't understand...
I really don't understand all of this. My mom has dementia, it is diagnosed. But her care is not covered by medicare, even though it is a disease. What is this hole in the system?
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When it rains...
When it rains, the grass gets wet. I know better than to traverse the back yard walking my dogs in the dark with wet grass. I was distracted. Tuesday, I had taken the day off work to go spend with my mother in MC, so I actually had more time to walk them leisurely. I slipped down a hill and broke my ankle. As I lay there…
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When is it time for more?
So, when do you know it's time for MC or 24 hour nursing at home? I'm dealing with my father who was previously diagnosed with VD and onsight ALZ with PTSD on top of all else. He's been in AL since February under the guise of home modifications for him to safely come home. Since he's been so happy in the facility, I've…
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Ashamed father doing bare minimum for wife, home and self
I live at home with my senior parents, acting as a part time caretaker. My dad is in his late 60s and my mom just turned 70. She was an alcoholic, had a stroke at 65 and was diagnosed with vascular dementia (VD). Before her stroke, their marriage was strained and he was planning on a divorce. For 3 years she was in…
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Solutions for Missing Laundry in MC?
Compared to many other challenges, this one is minor, but I am hoping someone has a workable solution. My father has been in MC for more than a year. I visit many times a week and would rather focus on being with him than on constantly surveilling for missing items. To date we have lost four sets of sheets, one unique…
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The money is gone!
Mom has been in Al for a year and a half. When we moved her in they said they accepted Medicaid waiver. I was never told family would need to pay the remaining. Partly my fault, I should have asked better questions. The facility is not what I had hoped it would be and I’m not sure how much longer she could safely stay…
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Simple technology for ederly
I'm starting this discussion because I've finally found some peace as a caregiver. I am a caregiver for my dad, who has Alzheimer's. At one point, everything became too much for me. He started to be more needy, and his memory is getting worse. I have to leave the house to go to work, and he would call me for every single…
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Incontinence?
My mom has VD and ALZ. For a while, I would say she would go to the bathroom frequently, wear pads, and we kind of determined this was because she was afraid of having an accident and having trouble really determining a full bladder. And while she still holds her bladder, she seems unable to know if she needs to go #2, or…
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SLUMS got me in a slump
My DM who is my pwd was given the SLUMS test today. She has been diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment/early stage Dementia, in December 2024. After much pleading she got authorized for an MRI. In July, she was diagnosed with Vascular Dementia. She is not on any meds. She refused both, Aricept and Memantine. I've…
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Memory Care + Aide - Make it make sense
I'm trying so hard not to vent, not to be angry. But my mom's MC is asking me to pay for a person to be with her 12 hours a day because of the falling. We literally can't afford this full time, so I'll be doing it on weekends. I get that they can't be with her 1:1 all day, but it's just incredible. The cost seems…
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Anger Issues with mom and losing caregivers
My mom is 89 years old with moderate Alzheimer's and Binswanger disease. She lives with my step-dad (they have been married over 50 years) who also was just diagnosed. I live 250 miles away and have been staying with my parents first for one week out of every month and now two weeks out of every month for over two years…