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Scared to be alone
I don’t know what to say anymore when my mom says ‘I’m lonely. When are you coming back? Promise?’ I see her in MC almost every day. I know that she is scared bc she understands to some degree that she is losing her mind and afraid of what’s to come. Today she said to me ‘I’m really going to miss you. I’m running out of…
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And so it begins....
My mom just shit on the floor. Completely missed the toilet. I am trying to get her medical insurance figured out but it's been difficult to get through to social services. We can't afford a house cleaner and we can't afford a full-time caregiver. I am a single mom and a student. I don't have time for this. I guess I just…
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New here, looking for support
My mom has been on a steady cognitive decline over the past 2 years after a big fall and some medications she was placed on. We have not been given the diagnosis of Dementia due to the fact that she will not get tested and gets extremely angry when it is suggested. (She has always had anger issues and does not let anyone…
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Overwhelmed? It is the loved ones of those with Alzheimer's who bear the greatest burden.
It is the loved ones of those with Alzheimer's who bear the greatest burden, and often care for them at the expense of their own well-being. It is common for family members and loved ones to find themselves thrust into this nightmare completely unprepared and ill-equipped for it. Sadly, much will be damaged or completely…
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Constant phone calls
Hi everyone, my mother is in MC. She constantly calls me, and gets upset if I don’t pick up the phone. I have blocked her number. I call her most days to check on her. She is now talking other residents and an aide to call my number from their phones. Do I need to figure out each new number and block that? I also don’t…
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Initial transition from home to care facility
I’ve been told to expect an immediate health decline when my parent is placed in a care facility. My M is extremely anti-social and my biggest concern is her thriving in this environment. Can anyone share their experiences in detail?
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Huge fiblet: spouse is "dead." Is it justified?
I've been living with/caring for Mom, in MS ALZ, for 5 weeks since Dad (also ALZ) fell and broke his hip: always our worst case scenario. Finally have her paperwork almost done for admission to a MC near me (700 miles from their home, which has made this all so hard). The plan is to take her on a plane for a "short visit"…
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Food Obsessions
My 90 YO mom with mixed dementia has become OCD for lack of a better descriptor about food expiration dates. I clearly write purchased and opened dates on everything with a sharpie but there still no trust and we waste a lot of money on food because she constantly throws it away when it’s perfectly fine She says it tastes…
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What is the best way to help
Hi, My mom was officially diagnosed with dementia last spring. I knew she had it before that. She can still manage on her own… mostly. She is incredibly independent and stubborn, she always has been. I find that all of her good and bad personality traits have become more pronounced. Is that familiar to anyone else? My…
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New Here
I am an only child. My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer's last Friday. I'm not sure how to feel or react still. I am trying to get her with me. That's what the dr has suggested. I live in an apartment. I'm doing my best to buy a home to bring her to. It's heartbreaking. But..I'm doing all I can.
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VD 93 yr old mom
just found you guys a couple of days ago. Thank you God for this support. I’ve known for quite a few years her mind was bad. Her old PC was not a very compassionate doctor so I finally switched her to a new one. CScan came back as vascular dementia. Her chronic UTI’s are a result of poor hygiene. She’s been on 6 rounds of…
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Caring for my grandmother and my family
Hello! New here and wanted to share my situation, and hopefully get some feedback. My wife and I and our two girls are live-in caregivers for my 93 year old grandmother. My kids are 5 and 6, and we have another on the way. When we moved in with her almost 4 years ago, we realized she wasn't getting the support she needed…
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New to the group, any advice helps!
My mom got diagnosed in September of this year with Alzheimer's. Right now, it is mild where she needs things explained to her a few times or gets confused about dates. She still has her memory and wits about her and luckily her and my father retired earlier this year so he's taking care of her. She can still function on…
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Navigating emotions and getting help
Hello, I'm new to this group. My mom has alzheimer's. She was diagnosed 1.5 years ago. Since then I have put her home in a trust, Found private care for 2 hrs in the morning M-F, and was sending her to an adult program 3 days a week. She's been to the neurologist and had a psych eval. Believe she's in the middle range of…
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How to help loved one adapt to memory care
My parent went into memory care a couple of days ago. How can family assist in her adapting to memory care? I live out of state but my sibling is nearby as are my parent's siblings. I would like her siblings involved in her care as much as they want to be because it's such a big job for just one person. Right now she is…
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Almost died
Good evening, A little over a week ago, on Jan. 9th, my Dad (pwd) went to the ER from memory care after a fall (complaint of head and hip pain). He had had pneumonia in Dec. and still had a bad cough. Turns out he had bronchitis and pneumonia again, and he was put on antibiotics. The CT scan done on his head didn't show…
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My mom is declining
Hi everyone. My mom is declining now and I am so afraid. I knew eventually this decline would come but I am still struggling so bad with it. She is still awake and eats some. But she is not drinking much, if anything, at all. She doesn't talk or walk anymore. She rarely smiles anymore. She was admitted to hospice 3 months…
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Spinning our wheels
I got a call this week from a speech therapist my mother saw a year ago. She said the staff at the MC facility had asked her to renew her services with my mother and that she sent me paperwork via email to sign that would allow her to begin a consultation. There is a copay agreement. Apparently, the staff was having…
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New here and trying to start vascular dementia discussions
Hello, I am FaustinaMary and am hoping to learn more from you. My loved parent is supposed as suffering from vascular dementia after an extended bout of rapid ventricular response. I am hoping to begin a subgroup here for those associated with "Vascular Dementia". Please join it for discussions if this pertains to you,…
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Catheter in RCFE or MC
I've searched posts on catheter issues…and i'm concerned. (i'm a new member). Dad is 82, slow advancing prostate cancer, ALZ and probably undiagnosed Parkinson's. He is in AL but since mid dec we've hired 24 hour care due to fall risk in AL. We have plans to move him in one week to a board and care. Stage 4 or 5 of ALZ. No…
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Secrets
Mom is in AL. She worries about everything! She is probably towards the end of stage 4. She is a bit difficult than most here since her memory is still good. She lacks good judgment, bad anosognosia, and lack of empathy. My adult daughter has been sick since Christmas and just got home from an intensive care hospital stay.…
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Adult Child Caregiver Support Group
I am new to this forum, but wondering if anyone has thoughts about an adult-child caregiver support group, particularly for caregivers at a distance. My mother is a widow and has MCI and may have mild dementia. We have a somewhat complicated relationship, but I am an only child and thinking of re-locating her to my area…
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Nighttime Delusions and Refusing to Go to Bed
I am not only becoming exhausted and burnt out, but I am running out of effective ways to respond. Trying to redirect him has not helped in his nighttime delusions, nor his times of anger and aggression. Help any ideas or solutions ? I am ashamed to say my patience and compassion is not what it should be right now.
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New Here - I'm Overwhelmed with Guilt That I Am Not Responding to Her Concerns Appropriately
Hi All, I am new here and thought I could seek some guidance from others in the same situation. I am the POA (and medical poa - whatever that is called) for my 82 year old aunt who is in a MCF. She has no spouse, children, or siblings (both brothers passes away in the last year) - so my husband and I are it. I'm not sure…
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Hospital stay - now what?
My mom (72) has been in MC since August. Minimum assistance w ADLs. Took her to ER on Saturday bc Flu and low BP. They admitted her to monitor her heart rate, oxygen, dehydration and kidney function. Pretty much was severely dehydrated which caused the acute kidney injury and low blood pressure. She’s stable but wheezing.…
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Mom stopped walking, starting hospice consultation
I’m exhausted. Mom moved in with us 2.5 months ago. We rehabilitated her after a failed rehab stay following a hospitalization. But she’s declining. Hospice support sounds promising because I need more help. She stopped walking today due to intense pain in her bad hip, but she also shuffles/drags her feet so maybe it’s…
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I wrote this essay to help others after losing my father to a long battle with Alzheimer's.
After losing my father to a long battle with Alzheimer's, I wrote this essay to help people navigate through the devastating journey of having a loved one with Alzheimer's, because it is the family and those closest to the individual with the disease who bear the greatest burden. Most people find themselves thrust into…
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Dad is new to community and NOT going well HELP!!
My dad was moved to MC. We are moving him to a closer community that has residents at his level - walkies-talkies. But he is having a hard time adjusting. He is not eating and tells us he wants to come home. He ended up in MC bc he left to find the bus to take him home. He is not drinking his cranberry juice, eating meals…
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Arguments that seem impossible to stop
Hi, alright I am new on this and taking care of my 72 year old mother. Are there any simple ways to get a person with dementia to stop arguing? Once my mother gets mad it seems impossible to get her to even attempt to think of something different. She likes to just make it seem like I have ruined her entire life and no…
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Memory Friendly Phone
does anyone have a recommendation for a phone? I’ve looked at a brand called Raz. It looks good online but would love everyone’s input/experience. thank you