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Vulgar language around kids
my mom (66 years young) is in the late stages. I have a 3 year old son who adores her but in the last few months she’s been very aggressive and mean. She’s begun to swear a lot, using really foul language, saying the worst things imaginable in front of my son. I don’t know what to do. He’s old enough to catch on, but too…
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Vermin Rat and Mouse Problem
About four years ago California's Governor Newsom banned rat and mouse poison replacing it with birth control in an effort to save the mountain lions and wildlife. Unfortunately this has created an increasing epidemic of vermin. The entire neighborhood as well as others I speak with locally are suffering. This is…
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To all caregivers Merry Christmas....
Oh how the holidays have changed. Blessed are the caregivers like me.
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Holes in the walls
Our father has been cutting out holes in the walls, creating a significant challenge for my sister and I. We have so many repairs to do after he dies. We have found that taking away tools does not deter him from causing damage, as he resorts to using alternative objects, such as metal rods or other items he can find in the…
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Our father used to kill animals, now he watches animal videos.
Our father has a violent aversion to animals and is aggressive towards them. He has a history of killing chickens, dogs, cats, and hates bird feeders. We've taken steps to try and distance him from wildlife and pets. We were able to rehome some of them, but after losing lives. Initially, he was secretive about his actions,…
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Untreated Nurosyphilis Dementia
We've quickly realized the importance of connecting with others who understand what we're going through. We're currently caring for our father, who has been suffering from untreated Neurosyphilis, GPI, Tabes Dorsalis, and dementia for several years now. Despite our best efforts to convince him to seek treatment, he has…
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Memory Care and/or Assisted Living facilities in Seattle?
Hi, I am currently in the weeds of looking at memory care facilities in the Seattle area for my father (has had Alzheimers for approx 10 years, mid stage, but moving more towards later stage). Additionally his wife (current caregiver) was also recently diagnosed with early dementia. Ideally I would love to find a place for…
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When to seek hospice assessment?
Hi, My mother is my father main caregiver but I see her increasingly doing more than her body can handle. She is not getting enough sleep because he keeps her up at night. She has to hold him up, and now she's starting to feed him. My father is a different person he was in the Spring. Now he sleeps constantly and barely…
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Our Father is Obsessed with Turning Off the Utilities
One of the most challenging aspects of caregiving for a loved one with late-stage untreated Neurosyphilis dementia, GPI, and tabes dorsalis is managing their behavior and preventing them from causing harm to themselves or others. Recently, my father has developed a concerning preoccupation with utility services, such as…
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Pooping in the Shower
Recently, we've observed a concerning shift in my father's behavior, which has added a new layer of complexity to our caregiving responsibilities. While my father's actions may seem intentional and without shame, it's essential to understand that this behavior is likely a result of his cognitive impairments and the…
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How to support emotionally who got diagnosed?
My parent got diagnosed with Alzheimer's. She understood the diagnosis because the dr said that the MRI definitively showed it. My parent accepted this as the truth. For her the diagnosis came out of nowhere as she is unaware of her symptoms of cognitive decline. She was sad and expressed not wanting to be a burden to…
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Mom with dementia moved to AL and misses her house. Can she go back and say bye to it?
Hello All. I recently had to put my mother into AL due to her dementia and she never had a chance to day goodbye to her house. We sold the house and I am wondering if I could take her back to it to say "goodbye?" Since she left she was crying daily about missing it and I am scared if I take her back, she will relapse into…
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Death of a parent with Alzheimer's
Hello I'm Matt me and my mom was caregivers to my dad who had the Alzheimer's we kept him home me and her faught along side him and his doctors he was 51 when he was diagnosed with dementia and he mad it to see his 71st birthday in September sadly he lost his battle on November the 14th at 2:00am it's still so hard to…
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New Here - 33 looking for support for mother diagnosed with AD
I am not normally one to reach out for support in this format but I feel very isolated in my mother’s recent Alzheimer’s diagnosis. We have seen her condition worsen over the last few years and last year there was a huge red flag for us when she couldn’t remember opening gifts at Christmas. I was 2 weeks postpartum and…
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Trazadone for sleep
Hi all, Has anyone had experience with Trazadone for sleep with the PWD. My LO stays up till 4 or 5am and then sleeps till almost 2pm if we don’t get him up and going. The Dr prescribed 50mg of Trazadone for sleep. I’m reluctant because of all the side effects. I have previously trying to wake him earlier and get him on a…
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Forgetting how to get in bed
Anyone dealt with a fairly functiontioning PWD but whom can’t seem to remember how to get herself in bed? My mom is still in AL despite some decline recently. She’s still able to use toilet and bathe herself, feed herself so not quite ready for MC (she doesn’t wander either). Previously she’d get herself in bed like a…
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Aggression and violence-early onset
Hi I have a dear friend that is dealing with her husbands combative, violent aggression. He is an early onset patient and 70 years young. He was placed in MC and they had to transport him to ER because he was harming the staff. The ER sent him to a geriatric psych facility 2 hours away. After 10 days there the psych…
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Memory Care “Incidents”
My mom has been in memory care for two months and has been in three “incidents” so far where other residents grab her (physically) when she’s entering or leaving her room because, in their state, they think my mom’s room is their room or they think she has something of hers, which she doesn’t. After each incident, she…
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New Here - Very Overwhelmed
Taking a deep breath here because I am not exactly sure where to even begin. My father is 75 and we do not yet have a full diagnosis but there is definite memory loss. My father has a lot going on, in addition to trying to figure this out, he also has cancer and is diabetic. He's experienced a lot of loss, as many people…
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In person support group for mom
Hello! Mom has been struggling with "age-related dementia" (malarkey) for a few years. Been working on diagnosis for almost a year. Finally have PET scan diagnosis- Moderate AD. My mil passed w AD so I know what's coming. But I didn't expect it to happen so abruptly. Mom lives with me most of the time. Goes to stay with…
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Help with not eating
My mother has virtually stopped eating. She has lost nearly 50 pounds in the last 4-5 months. Her eating has dropped to maybe a half cup of food maybe twice a day. She a is still active and very independent including cooking for herself and my father. I need help. I have tried everything I can think of. Where can I turn?
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Should I replace my Mom’s Computer?
My mom is now in her third month in AL after a fall presented the opportunity for a change she had been resisting. She’s not as happy as before, but she’s managing and at least she really likes the food. Recently her ancient Chromebook died. She does post on FB occasionally and checks her email maybe once a week. She also…
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Unplugging Cord for Fear of Fire
My mother is in memory care and has been diagnosed with moderate dementia. Lately, and especially when she is staying with one of us children, we find her unplugging everything in her room at the assisted living before she leaves and in her bedroom at our houses when she goes to bed because she’s afraid she’s going to…
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Parent in denial
Hello, I am new to this forum and am seeking some assistance in how to best navigate getting someone to be seen for concerns of dementia/alzheimers? My mother has been exhibiting symptoms for a few years and her memory and ability to convey her thoughts clearly are greatly diminishing. She refuses to acknowledge this…
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Cameras indoor
Hi, does anyone have a suggestion on indoor cameras? My mother is living alone for now and I put a camera in kitchen & one by her favorite chair & on patio. These cameras follow movement and also have a red light and she notices them and unplugs them. I’m not sure if they make a camera without the red light coming on or…
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New to the group: Mom won’t stop shopping online
Hi there, My mother has been suffering from memory decline for a few years and was just officially diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, in the early enough stages we’re talking about Lecanemab and I’m sure I’ll be back asking questions about that! One thing we’re dealing with that I feel like others have also struggled with is that…
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New to the group: Dad diagnosed with MCI, what now?
First time posting here, glad to have found this group! My dad is a widower and lives alone. In the past few months, his memory and cognitive skills have noticeably declined. Primary care doctor referred us to a neurologist and my dad scored 20 on the MOCA. My dad was very agitated by the appointment, said he didn’t trust…
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How to convince a loved one to move into an assisted living facility
hello. I am a caregiver for my father. He currently lives alone. I live very close to him. His Alzheimer’s has progressed and I’m concerned about him living alone. I’ve had some things in place the last few years that have allowed him to remain home but his behaviors, especially late in the day, are concerning me. The…
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Thanksgiving MC
I don’t know what to do about thanksgiving. My mom is in MC. Has been since August. She keeps bringing up Thanksgiving and my sister who usually hosts. My sister and I were hoping that bringing our families together at the MC’s Thanksgiving holiday buffet celebration would help but it hasn’t. She’s fixated on Thanksgiving…
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Dad with early stage, worsening
Hi, My sweet dad, 84, is declining and he knows it. It’s utterly heartbreaking. He has begun saying he lives in another house that is exactly like his. Most days, he falls asleep in his chair in the afternoon. I also have to make sure he eats because he won’t think to or he gets overwhelmed thinking about it. Until one day…