-
Wants to talk to his parents
I’m posting again on this issue because it came up again but worse. He wants to see his parents again. I said they were staying with his sister for a while. He wants to call them to talk to them. I pretended to call his sister and that she didn’t answer - and I would try again later. Distraction wasn’t helping at all. Then…
-
Wants to go home to his parents
My DH has asked off and on over the last few months if his parents are alive, and I’ve said no they are not and he’s been fine with that. Over the last couple of weeks, around 6:00 or so, he mentions he needs to go home. I tell him you live here with me so you can just stay here - again he’s been fine with that. Today at…
-
Do some MCFs accept those who can no longer transfer?
The one I toured told me no, once they get to the stage of not being able to transfer themselves out of bed to a walker for example, they won’t accept them. And if they are already in their MC when they get to this stage, they put them in their SNF, which is like a hospital. No private rooms. Can you all tell me your…
-
Waiting
Why do I always feel like I'm waiting on something? My DH has VD and alz. Plus multiple other problems copd cad ect. . Now he almost seems normal. I keep waiting for something to happen. WHY? WHY CANT I JUST ENJOY THE PLATUE HE IS ON?. What is wrong with me?
-
projecting future costs and availability of funds
Today I learned that your investment person, or financial advisor, or ??? can put your information into a spreadsheet that projects how long someone's funds will last if they enter memory care at a given date. Intuitively I knew this could be done but it had never been suggested to me in a "you ought to do this now" sort…
-
Being Alz”hammered”
Anyone been Alzhammered? Allow me to explain. So there you are finally taking time out, you go for a few hours out to relax and some of your acquaintances happen to be there. Mine happens to be the local Moose Lodge. Not so much friends but people you hang out with when you're there. Everyone asks you how your LO is… how…
-
Is Memory Care inevitable?
My DH is stage 6. So far I’ve been able to be the sole caregiver. Family sometimes gives me a break. He won’t cooperate with in home care, just follows me everywhere trying to get away from them. Thank God for meds that keep him agreeable (mostly) He is incontinent and at times bowel incontinent. The underwear from…
-
DW recently put in MC facility
My DW is 82 , and has middle stage Alzheimer's. After being a 24/7 caregiver for 2 years, I had to place her because I just couldn't do it anymore. She has been there for 3 months now. I visit her often, and she knows who I am and that we are married. However, she seems to be attracted to several men in the facility, and…
-
From Maybe to Reality
DH in ES thought. Then, several episodes of mis-rememering, including asking our adult son if he remembered a certain episode from his (DH's) youth. For the past 3 weeks he has been just fine, more or less, just the occasional lost word. In my mind I knew he still had Alz, but it just seemed like , well, maybe it will be a…
-
How can I get DH to sleep at night?
Hubby would probably be a wanderer if we still lived in a large house rather than a condo. He also needs my assistance getting around, even with a walker. So every night we're up and down going from the bed to toilet, to bed, to living room... he wakes me 8-10 times a night. Sometimes he does need to urinate but usually he…
-
Paranoia
My wife has become paranoid. She has accused me of stealing her mail, and is convinced that our daughter has stolen bed pillows and jewelry from her. I’ve tried reasoning with her, but to no avail. Any ideas on how to deal with this?
-
When you have to correct LO
My LO is certain her home is across the street and will head that way from time to time. The only distraction is to offer a ride home. Works. I know we are not supposed to correct lo’s, but how can you tell your LO that that house and others are not their home with out creating a stressful situation… Kind of an odd…
-
Sitting Vigil
I am sitting vigil tonight at DH's bedside. It took three tries to insert a new Foley catheter this morning. Each insertion in recent months had been more and more difficult. He began bleeding out. He has an enlarged prostate and a latent tumor that he's had for 23 years. He may have a new tumor, too. He has lost a great…
-
I Think It's Time
Not for MC, though that will be coming soon. Time to quit my job. I thought I could hang in there with it, but I simply cannot do it. I find the job so frustrating — a super dysfunctional org with lots of disrespect thrown around. And, I'm an utter wreck from feeling split every hour of the day between trying to keep some…
-
Why?????
(Insert scream at top of lungs) Why??? Why my bf who is 45??? Why anybody??? Freaking WHY!!!!????? I HATE THIS DISEASE SO MUCH!!!!! Ill never understand why? We are all in this together 💜
-
Torn and heartbroken
Hello all. I am coming to ask advise and what others have done. I have been advised by my hubby's doctor that it may be wise to get a divorce. What?!?!? Heart is not accepting that. They stated it was so that the state doesn't take all our assets for his care. If we do it now, it is early and they won't override it. Have…
-
Sydney to Hobart Yacht Race
Sailing was what we did, always together, we started sailing joined our 1st Yacht Club in 1971. This is what I wrote on Boxing Day with a very sad heart. The Sydney Hobart Yacht Race All morning he’s said to me. What time is it on, I don’t want to miss it, I must put it on The cricket was going, the time ticked around,…
-
speech therapy?
Hi, All, We have a speech therapy order from my partner's neurologist. They provided it at my request even though they were not very positive about yet I have read that it can be helpful for people with Alzheimers who are having difficulty speaking. Has anyone had any experience with this and could share? I would…
-
Nonstop for my dad. Need suggestions.
My mother has had dementia for 2 years. My father is taking care of her in our own home. Recently, she has been nonstop needing something after helping her just 5 minutes ago. If no one answers right away, she'll throw her cup on the floor, then she will knock her tray down. She also intentionally tries to roll of the…
-
Difficult for him but a bit of "light" for me - SSDI approved
My husband had two appts for SSDI a couple of weeks ago. He hasn't worked for two years, and financially I am struggling. On a side note, I didn't know initially that I could apply for my 15 yr old son as well. I guess I should do that now. I was worried about those two appts because his neurologist has never said "I think…
-
New to group, in process of getting diagnosis
This is my first post. DH had neuropsych testing done today and now more aware of his memory loss than before. He has been depressed and PCP treating that. Going to first neurologist appointment in 3 weeks. Tonight he gave his drug addicted daughter his credit card number so she could get an uber. This is uncharacteristic…
-
What Do I Need to Learn?
Hello all, Thank you for your collective wisdom. I've been reading posts and learning. My DH was diagnosed with ALZ a month ago. We're early in the process with MCI right now. He works, drives, cooks, etc. (but is slowing down cognitively and short term memory is poor). I'm taking some time off of work to get some things…
-
Inhibition
I am sure this has been talked about many times and maybe even by me. Does Alzheimers lower inhibitions so they speak more openly about what they do remember about the past, not counting delusions and hallucinations. When they say something are they less guarded, so their true feeling come out. I know they can be afraid of…
-
6 month wait for a neurologist?
My DH clearly suffers from dementia. Can't do any of the things asked by his doctor's nurse (Draw a clock, remember 5 things, draw a square inside a circle...), sundowning daily. Yesterday he was frantic because he thought an airplane had flown into our building above us and the bldg was going to collapse. He wanted to use…
-
Tired and Sad Need to Talk
Things seem to be getting worse although it’s hard to tell. Sometimes my DH is relatively responsive but everything seems to be getting harder and slower. He is having an ECG next week an irregular heart beat, he has swollen ankles and sleeps a lot during the day and most of the night until 4.30am anyway. Has trouble…
-
Care Giving Conundrum
Been away for a while. Doing my best to keep up. Last week things changed from somewhere in Moderate to Advanced. Still waiting for the new instructions. [:o). Things are changing. Still greeted most morning with "how do I get out of here!". Needs to go home are still based on some kind of family emergency and difficult to…
-
It was a long and scary week
Last Thursday, January 9th, MC called and said my DH was very ill and an x-ray showed he had bronchitis and pneumonia and needed immediate medical attention. They sent him by ambulance to the ER. We were digging out from a blizzard that had dumped over a foot of snow on our area and I was still not able to get out. A…
-
Oh no. New low
My DH as certainly been declining lately. Just now he asked me where our kids are. He says they aren’t here. Of course they are not. They are 47, 44, and 43 and all have their own homes. It reminds me of his mother who had Alzheimer’s and who called 911 saying the kids were playing in the yard and were now missing. I think…
-
New issue
My DH had a physical spell early this morning. He wanted up to go to bathroom about 5 a.m. this morning. I made sure he made it to the toilet and let him have some privacy. He was in there a little longer than usual, so asked if he needed some help. Found him weak and very pale and clammy. I helped get him back to bed and…
-
When to move?
My husband was diagnosed with MCI a year ago and is declining. We had planned to downsize, but now I'm wondering if that would be too disorienting for him. He already carries a lot of anxiety before this diagnosis, and I worry that a move will accelerate his condition. On the other hand, it really is time to get out of…