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Managing care
Hello, first post here. I am my dad's daughter and medical/durable POA. He has mid-stage LBD. He is physically pretty healthy except for chronic UTIs which we finally have managed. He is in a wonderful RCF with a nurse on staff and loving caregivers that adore him. But lately it seems like so many little things are…
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Urine smell in pants
Hi yall my bf (46 EOA) Has been fully incontinent for some time. He gets the bed nightly, is there a soap that gets rid of the light urine smell? It's not super bad but I notice it when getting his clothes out of the dryer. Thanks in advance. We are all in this together 💜
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Garbled speech
Curious about garbled speech and wandering. Mom’s in MC, probably stage 6. Miraculously, her moods are good and she’s extremely well taken care of. The past few months I’ve noticed her speech is more garbled. She frequently uses mashed up words, and most sentences don’t make sense. She’ll repeat syllables almost like a…
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Near the end
Lately, my (66yr old, stage 6, early onset) husband has been taking his penis out and peeing on the floor as he's walking to the bathroom. Two different sources have told me they saw this behavior, "near the end." Does anyone have experience with this? If he truly is "near the end," I'll 1)Ask hospice to assess him again.…
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Boyfriend with early stage
Does anyone have a boyfriend with dementia, repeating questions and forgets conversations? I could use some support if anyone out there can relate. He is very easygoing and loving, but wonder what this will do to our relationship in the future.
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Contesting my mom's will.
My sister told me about how family members fight over the will. I've been naive thinking black and white and that the will is going to be carried out as intended by my mom.
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From the NYT: What to Do When a Loved One was Diagnosed with Dementia
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/25/well/family/dementia-diagnosis-advice.html?unlocked_article_code=1.Rk8.WazS.hyIqt9FeloJq&smid=url-share This talks about next steps and how to prepare for them. It's pretty basic, but might be good for someone new to the disease. HB
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Premonition of Memory Care Move
Last year for about 4 months before he went to memory care, my DH talked about being separated from me. He talked about how he didn't want to leave, that he wanted us to be together. He also would take all of his clothes out of his drawers every night and pile them on his bed like he was packing for a trip. There was no…
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How to reduce phone calls and text messages
My mom moved in with us 3 months ago. She has always had problems with confidence and has needed reassurance even before ALZ. Now that she is living here with MCI, it is so much worse. I work from home as a mental health registered nurse and frequently am in virtual meetings on camera where I need to participate. I also…
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ZERO short term memory
My mom is 80 with moderate to severe (per Neuro) ALZ. She has no short term memory at all it’s not even 1 minute it’s just gone. She eats obsessively because she says no one gave her anything to eat. she actually ate 6 donuts and an entire package of large sized cookies and still wanted more. My sister was watching her and…
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Avoid all types of confrontation?
Hello, My husband is newly diagnosed, and I have so many questions. I'll start with just one today. For background: My husband is 56, and he has had memory issues for about three years, probably longer. He went through many doctor's appointments and tests and received the final diagnosis last month. I attended an…
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First experience with wandering
Woke up at 1:45 this morning with DH missing. First time he’s ever done anything like this. Sheriff’s office had helicopter going, canine units, added bloodhounds, silver alert, the works. So scary! They found him at around 9 about 4 miles away. He used to always carry his wallet which I had an AirTag in, but stopped…
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When to go to memory care
I sense that I will need to consider this for my DW later this year. When that happens, will she have periods of remembering?
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Cataract surgery
Mom is probably to the end of stage 4. She was diagnosed with vascular dementia 2 years ago. I was told average life expectancy is 5 years. I know that’s just a rough number. She has diabetes with edema in her legs. I don’t think she could follow a storyline to read a book. She is able to choose her meals off the menu at…
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Getting care for my father
I moved my father into my home in January 2024, due to his progressing dementia. He was living with my step mom, who also, due to a health problem, has since moved in with her own children. I am struggling to understand how long-term Medicaid works. I work full-time and I am not able to quit or retire, but I don't want to…
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Leqembi treatments for early dementia
Hello everyone. So my neurologist is sending me to a specialty clinic that does infusion Leqembi treatments. I was wondering if anyone here has been on it and if they have had any problems with brain bleeds or brain swelling. I'm trying to learn as much as I can about it so I can ask the right questions to the specialist.…
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I am just so sad
My DH passed from Alzheimer's on June 17th. We were together for 36 years, most of it very good. I just can't stand the grief. How can someone who was so vibrant simply cease to be? How can I live the rest of my life without him? My mind knows that time will help, but right now it is so hard. This forum has been so helpful…
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My husband is dead
This morning my husband died from Alzheimer's disease. I am incredibly grateful his wretched journey with this disease is over. I did my best as a caregiver though I fell short as you would expect a human to do. I will greatly miss who my husband used to be, but I will never miss what he became as the disease took hold of…
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Hospice at home?
mom has Alzheimer’s, stage four or five. Her husband of 71 years is now going into hospice. We are debating on whether to bring him home so she can spend time with him or placing him in a hospice facility. My fear is that my mom will not remember what is going on and having him here will be harder on her than if we had to…
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Unmarried partner not living together
My bf of 77yrar d has had memory issues and I asked him to get evaluated. After months and months with several steps along the way he has been diagnosed with MCI. I can’t keep track of everything he does and it seems like he is forgetting a lot of things. Seems he thought he was scammed the other day and called ti make a…
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What I miss the most
No question just how I feel. I have had a couple of drinks and am sitting in an empty house thinking (drinking and thinking maybe a dangerous combination). I have been married for 49 years and during the first 25 years I thought we had as close to perfect marriage as possible. the last 24 years has been much less than…
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Sudden mental changes
My spouse (70) was recently retested using the MMSE test, her score went from 19 a year ago to 11. Over the past 6 weeks we have experienced significant shifts in personality and overall happiness. Before very generous, she has become very me/mine focused. She does recognize that we are married (48 years), last night…
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A good day!
I wanted to post something positive for a change. 🙂 Today was one of those days with my DH where I say to myself “I can take care of him, no problem”. He was a little bit confused and quiet when he first got up, but was in a good mood all day, no outbursts of anger, only a quick little mention of going “home”, easy to…
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Don’t know how to start, Long Rant Warning!! ⚠️
Okay, I guess I’ve officially “lost it”! I shouldn’t have, but I did. I flew off the handle and screamed and yelled at DW(stage 5/6) this afternoon. I stormed around the house, upset the dogs, and ended with us each going to our separate “corners”. I was an ass, it was bad! The ridiculous last straw was DW trying to feed…
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Home to his parents in the evening
For about a week, DH has been adamant about going hime to his parents or calling his father, etc. Usually it starts around 4:00 so I’m assuming he’s starting to sundown. It’s so hard coming up with fiblets that will satisfy him. I’ve tried so many of the ideas I’ve seen on this forum. Sometimes we drive around, going…
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THE DAY SHE COULDN’T DRAW A CLOCK
I read this today and it touched me greatly. THE DAY SHE COULDN'T DRAW A CLOCK “From the memoir-in-progress by Michael J. Whelan The technician handed Rebecca a piece of paper and gave her what should have been a simple task. “Draw a clock,” he said gently. “Put the numbers where they belong, just like a regular clock…
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Tramadol Question
Hi All - So my mom is in assisted living on Hospice care for over a year now. She is in a Broda chair and they now use a Hoyer lift getting her into bed/shower etc. She is down to 95 pounds. I would say late stage 5 or early 6. She has been taking Tramadol 2x a day (morning and night). A Hospice nurse called and said that…
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Pisa syndrome (Pleurothotonus)
Hi friends. I haven't been on the site for a while, nor have I kept up with dementia related things. It is just over three years since I entered stage 8. So please take whatever I say with a grain of salt, and do your own research if needed. But I just wanted to pass this on in case it had not been discussed here. For…
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My sister has POA-medical. But we need DPOA for my mom, who has moderate Alzheimer's.
My mom can't make her own medical decisions due to advancing Alzheimer's. Right now my sister only has HIPPA-level access to my mom's medical info per the existing POA, which was drawn up years ago when she just had mild cog impairment as a dx . Do we need anything beyond a doctor's letter (or two?) and an eldercare lawyer…