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New here. Overwhelmed
I’m caring for my dad, 84. He’s at home. Still able to walk, bathe, use the bathroom and dress by himself. He gets so depressed, though. Just hangs his head almost to his chest. He often thinks we are at a home that looks like his, but it isn’t. He is getting more and more assertive when talking to me. I just needed to…
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THE INSOMNIA AT STAGE 7
Hello to all, I am very sleep deprived at the moment, but wanted to post, Please excuse any bloopers. DH is having very restless nights. He has been on Seraquel 25 mg which has helped with mood , but not with sleep. So we are on a trial and error path for sleep med. The first one, Zyprexa was useless, Now switched to…
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I wrote this essay to help others after losing my father to a long battle with Alzheimer's disease.
After losing my father to a long battle with Alzheimer's, I wrote this essay to give a glimpse into this horrific disease, draw attention to the red flags and signs (there are many people at this very moment who have a family member with dementia and still do not realize it), and especially to help people navigate through…
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Hiw many spouses sleep in another room?
My DH gets extremely anxious and agitated, sundowning is in full effect at our house. My husband is up and down all night long. Good nights 15x, many nights 25+. I can't take care of him if I'm not getting any sleep. Dr tried respiridine and trazadine but they decreased his BP to critical levels, 70/50. Off those meds, BP…
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The realities of paying for M/C
I'm wanting to hear from those of you who have been down this road and are ahead of me on this journey. We are still maintaining at home for now. I would like to keep him home as long as he isn't violent or wandering but I a realist and know I need to have a back up plan. We aren't rich but both have pensions and SS. The…
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Looking for MC
It has been 11 days since my DH was admitted to the hospital. After 3 days, he was admitted to a Geriatric Psychiatric unit an hour away from our house. I go every day to see him and he wants to go home . He has no memory of his violence, but I am afraid to have him home. I have been looking for a decent available spot for…
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Am I being unreasonable?
I’m 81, my DW is 82. I have been her primary caregiver since she was diagnosed three years ago. We live in rural Western PA. Between our prior marriages we have 8 kids. They all live far away, the closest is her daughter who lives fours away. She is in stage 5. I have had to take over all the finances, medications, meal…
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When do you know it's time for a facility?
Hello. My name is Maria and I'm new to this forum. My mother will be 83 in July and is still living independently in a 2 story townhome with laundry in the basement. She has a companion that comes from 11:30 - 4:30 on weekdays. My sister and I spend time with her every Wednesday evening and on weekends when we can. We are…
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Needing support from my online "friends" who walk a similar journey.
I'm strong most of the time but feeling very vulnerable tonight. MCI diagnosis after neuro/psych testing many yrs ago. 2 strokes and 2 vascular surgeries later dr says likely VD. DH refuses further testing or medical evaluation. He's done. Don't blame him, its been a lot of tests that ruled out lots of things. He wants no…
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Big Move today!
After touring several memory care facilities, I found one that really seemed perfect. I am waiting now to hear that the transport is on the way! I moved his furniture into his room, yesterday, with the help of my son and sister in law. It looks cozy and homey, Now, to help him ease in without too much drama! It has been…
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Navigating Alzheimer’s Risk While Caring for Both Kids & a Parent—How Are You Coping?
Hi everyone, I’m in my 40s, raising kids, and also caring for a parent with Alzheimer’s. My mom has APOE4 x2. Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about what this means for my own future—both emotionally and proactively. I recently started looking into early detection tests, including: • APOE4 genetic testing • Blood biomarker…
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Trigger warnings
Hi all, yesterday my LO with stage 4-5 received a late payment bill and spent 3 hours going through his papers and swearing he paid the bill even when there had been no check written or recorded. I have taken over ALL the bills except that one😝it was 3 hours of cussing, going back and forth to the mailbox. Finally at 10 PM…
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Female spouse w/young kids looking for mom in similar situation?
I'd love to find a caregiver like myself to exchange texts with, like our own mini support group. This is likely too specific, but ideally it would be a woman whose partner is in the early stages of Alzheimer's (like, very very early stages where most people can't tell) and whose kids are still living at home (our kids are…
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The Velveteen Rabbit
I posted this a long while back, but most of the people here now are new, so I thought it would be a good time to repost. When we were married, almost 46 years ago, the priest added this reading to our wedding ceremony from a children’s book, “The Velveteen Rabbit” by Margery Williams. My sister read it at the ceremony. I…
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Transitioning While Alert and Active
My LO 82 has Vascular Dementia and Alzheimer’s, heart failure, kidney disease, COPD AND asthma. The doctor said she is transitioning. She sleeps a lot, but talks normally, walks to the bathroom, and family room on her own, helps to bathe herself. Other than the sleeping a lot and memory loss, she seems normal. But says…
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End of life?
Me and my brother are both helping to care for my grandad, my nan too and he has carers come in multiple times a day because it's a lot for us to deal with. He's recently stopped breathing, or struggled breathing every day for the last 7-10 days. Breaths every 30-40 seconds and in a lot of pain, he's had care come out for…
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Just need to vent : Last Days of Gene Hackman: ABC News Special
It is obvious that his spouse went to great length to protect his medical privacy and it was something she was quite successful at. I have great admiration for what she was able to accomplish. Protecting the dignity of my DW is priority #3 after her health and safety. It is not an easy thing to do. Now her reward for…
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helping my brother with short term memory loss as his guardian
I am at a loss. My brother lost his wife and continued to drink heavily. Became real sick and ended up with dementia/short term memory loss. He was able to gain a little back but I don't know what to do. I took him away from his home because there was no one there to care for him when he left the hospital. My husband I…
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Best music players for people with mid stage dementia
I would like to get my mom some type of device where she could listen to music in her room in the long term care facility. She is in stage 4 of dementia and can operate her phone and other simple devices. I’m not sure what type of device would work best. A radio or some type of streaming device which someone could set up…
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Cost of Memory Care
I read yesterday that Memory Care is $115,000 a year. How can anyone afford that??!! and what are the alternatives?
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When to move to memory care
My wife periodically thinks I am her father from time to time. We can go days between the episodes, which can last until bedtime. Then she will wake up fine. My concern is that she will still recognize me from time to time after I move her. I will be absolutely heartbroken that I abandoned her. She does not wander, so I am…
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Vacation
My husband has moderate vd dementia. Prior to this dx, we bought a timeshare that I am still paying on. The idea of not being able to travel and use that is awful to me. I still work full time and have a companion with him most of the day. Our last vacation was when I saw a huge difference in him and he "lost" the memory…
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Retired military or spouse with Tricare
This is new coverage for members with Tricare insurance. For up to the next five years, TRICARE will cover Food and Drug Administration (FDA)-approved monoclonal antibodies (MABs) lecanemab (brand name Leqembi) and donanemab (brand name Kisunla), for the treatment of Alzheimer’s disease in patients with mild cognitive…
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There goes my hero ..... 😢
Hello and thank you for reading this, I'm sorry for such a long-winded post I had a longer message written up. However, I didn't know if anyone would read it. I don't have anyone in my life who has had any first-hand experience with Alzheimer's to ask any of these questions and I'm having a difficult time dealing with…
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Does It Matter?
My mom has been living at a Memory Care Facility for a little over a year (but has had dementia for approximately 8 years) and while she still knows people that have been in her life for a long time, she essentially has no short term memory and is "stuck" where she was about 8 years ago (living in the same house, my dad…
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Unusual Walk
We go for a mile walk every day weather permitting. Of late my LV who is 74 yrs old and physically very fit , has been walking “strange” of late. I am afraid she will trip and fall. Anybody experienced this ?
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Feeling So Sad 11
Please don’t laugh 🤣 I sat on my phone and cut off my sadness post. Maybe that was a good thing it was enough to break my melancholy. I feel better but it happens quite a bit. My DH often asks who am I? Where do I sleep? Do I have a brother? etc mostly I just happily move on but it got to me today and I felt so very sad.…
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Do we tell mom we're going to be selling her house?
My sister and I moved mom into an assisted living/memory care facility last August and we are now needing to sell her house to help pay for her care. She is probably in middle stages, but it's hard to pin down as I don't think it's straight up Alzheimer's, but more likely mini strokes. She has lots of confusion,…
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6th infusion
Today was # six Leqembi infusion. So far so good! Although I do have a headache and feel exhausted. I'm scheduled for a second MRI this Friday. My husband keeps reassuring me I'm doing so good and how strong I am, but I don't feel strong. I guess I'm just having a bad day. (pity party for one) anyone else out there…
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Advice on Phone / Internet Access
Hi all. My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s over a year ago and has been getting worse. She’s unfortunately extremely vulnerable to scammers online and has fallen victim to gift card fraud scams to the tune of 13,000 dollars since last July. We’ve had to take away her devices to prevent further contact with them. She…