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Manage stairs or move?
We live a in lovely condo community in a detached three story condo. My DH is in late stage 5 moving into stage 6. He is still physically fine. He walks slower but otherwise is ok. He had one fall about a year ago. Seems to handle the stairs ok in our home. Our primary bedroom is on the second floor. We do not have any way…
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Hopeless
My wife of 50 years has Alzheimer's. I am and have been caring for her. This past year has been unbearable. First a little context. Our daughter is 44 and lives with us. She is mentally and physically challenged and basically stays in her room. My wife has digressed so much this past year and I have tried everything…
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Can’t take it
My DH with dementia is driving me stark raving mad. Every single day, multiple times a day, I am looking for a dish towel or the sponge I use to wash dishes. DH takes them outside to dry. I have asked so many times for him to stop it, but it continues. That may sound petty, but add that to all the other things he puts in a…
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Walk With Bill_2001: Before & After Respite Care
Hi Friends, I posted earlier about my experience with a 4-day respite care stay for my dear wife. My wife is currently receiving hospice services at home, and I am still caring for her on my own while working full time. Hospice recommended respite care for my wife so that I could get some relief and rest. Respite is a…
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Does anyone have suggestions about which home products to get for home safety?
I will be looking for medical bracelet, home camera, door chimes, stove knob covers, plug in devices, etc. I am the wife and caregiver and it is time to safeguard. Thanks... Feel a bit overwhelmed
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does anyone know if medicare will cover in house care for patient?
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Overwhelmed
My husband recently diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's (63) and caring for aging parents. I am feeling very overwhelmed and sad and just all the feelings. I am really glad I found this group. I feel like I need somewhere to go to talk about what's happening and this seems like a safe place. I've already read some of…
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Mothers claims of abuse
I’m hoping somebody has dealt with this and can help. My mother is currently in a memory care facility. She says people go into her room and push and pull her and abuse her. She was at a different memory care and we thought maybe the language barrier between her and the caregivers was the problem when she made the same…
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ApoE4 homozygote
Hello everyone, I'm 72 years old, was diagnosed with ALZ in Oct 2025 and started Leqembi infusions in Dec. I am still asymptomatic, but as an APoE4 homozygote I find myself waiting for the other shoe to drop. I have not met anyone else with two copies of the APoE4 allele (I understand we make up only 2% of the general…
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Are our 'numbers' gone?
The numbers in the headings are gone. I sincerely hope this is not permanent, as I found that feature to be very helpful. It was helpful for greeting folks new to the forum, and sympathizing with those going through a rough time who may have been here longer. Just wondering - thanks.
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Any tips to help LO get into bed to rest on their SIDE?
Hello, My DH sleeps better if lying on his side, but he doesn't know how to get into that position, and weighs too much for me to put him into it by lifting or pulling. He suffers from apraxia, so has (cognitive) trouble with coordinated movements. If he starts by sitting on the bed (coming from the side), then lays his…
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Caring for my mother with advanced Alzheimer’s
It has been a more challenging past couple of weeks for my mother who I’m caring for with advanced Alzheimer’s- she’s 73 yrs old. About 2 -3 weeks ago her aggressive behavior began to increase. She hit a couple of different aids (smacked one them and used a fly swatter on the other one) and was verbally aggressive. I spoke…
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How do you know the right time for memory care?
My wife is stage 6+ Alzheimer's. Over the last few months my DW's bowel incontinence has become troublesome. She no longer understands that she has soiled her underwear. It's hard for me to keep up with it. After my DW soils her underwear, she then refuses to have them removed. She just wants to pull them back up! It's so…
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Officially doing this again - vascular
My mom died 4 years ago after a very long battle with Alzheimers (early onset.) Now I'm going through it again with my dad, although it's vascular dementia this time. He passed out recently and the work up afterwards revealed the vascular brain changes, though I'm not surprised. His memory has been getting progressively…
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any advice on hospital bed mattress causing/contributing to migration and delirium
Hello community, My father is at home and started with hospice about a month and a half ago. they immediately provided a hospital bed,which looks to be almost a hundred years old- like something out of an asylum. I only recently tried it out myself and it made me feel so sad and angry that my dad has been sleeping in it…
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How to answer when they think you have disappeared
my mom has Alzheimer’s and lately she has started where almost everyone is a double person. You will be sitting there and she knows who you are but then she wants to know where her daughter (or granddaughter etc) went even though you are right there. This upsets her tremendously and worries about this person because they…
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Advice on Mother's Paranoia
Hi. First time asking a question. My 93 year old Mother has Vascular Dementia. She's in the late stages. She has hallucinations and very paranoid. She told me today she wants to talk to two family members regarding, what she believes to be the family upset with her. She thinks she made them upset several years ago. She…
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I need help understanding this
Ive known for quite sometime now that something wasnt right with mom. Whether it was reconnecting all the connections on the TV and internet on each visit, fixing all of the clocks, and changing passwords to her accounts every other day. This went on for a few years. But then she hears her long time deceased parents in the…
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“Remember I Didn’t Mean To”
Inspired by the positive post of @lilacgirl, I will share a note of mine that I came across today that put some steel in my spine. It was from four years ago, and I was texting a cousin about visiting my dad, then in early stages and still at his house. I reported that he was concerned about forgetfulness and confusion,…
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Dementia is more than memory loss…
Dementia is not just memory loss. It’s cognitive decline. It affects the brain, and the brain controls everything. Movement. Sensation. Perception. Judgment. Sure, memory is part of that, but it’s not the whole picture. People can have dementia without obvious memory problems, and we are very bad at recognizing that.…
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Inevitability?
My darling mom forgot who I was and it shredded my very fragile heart. She argued that she had never met me before moving into this "Facility." Keep in mind, we live in a house. She asked me of my ancestors. When I told her the names of my maternal grandparents, she got visibly upset. She said her parents never told her…
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Is Cousin Larry Taking Advantage?
I am a friend and part-time paid caregiver to 80 year old Betty, who is very newly diagnosed with early stage Alzheimer's, primarily manifesting now in short-term memory losses. Betty is financially secure, but has few family members; she's outlived those closest to her, yet there are a few extended family members, most of…
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Hospice for mom with no advance directive?
Hello. Has anyone had to navigate end of life decisions for a LO with dementia who has no advance directive? My mother absolutely refused to discuss let alone commit to writing anything having to do with illness or death even before dementia set in. She's not in end-stage Alzheimer's. It's a blood disease that has us…
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Driving is risky reminder
91 year old killed one & injured folks at a Trader Joe's parking lot. Witness said driver said she pushed on the "brake" but car just sped up. https://abc7news.com/post/1-killed-4-hurt-car-hits-pedestrians-parking-lot-outside-trader-joes-los-angeless-fairfax-district-officials-say/19786314/?ex_cid=TA_KGO_FB Unknown if she…
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Support Groups for people who has dementia
I was just diagnosed with MCI dementia. My doctor wants to start infusion therapy to breakup plaque on the brain. Has anyone been on this therapy, and did you have any side effects?
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Inpatient
My DH is so impatient. Going through the drive thru for food is crazy. He can't make up his mind and get aggravated if I ask him how he wants it. Then they take to long, can be at a restaurant too. Its getting to be frustrating. Just needed to vent for a min.. thanks.
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Question from new member
Hello. I just found this group. My father has Alzheimer's, and my mother is his primary caregiver. My sister and I live close and are helping as much as we can. Mom is showing the wear-and-tear of the situation. We are looking for a place where we can benefit from the experiences of others who've already gone further down…
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Just one of those nights
Some evenings the depression hits me a bit more than usual. I’m usually pretty positive, but for some reason tonight was different. I know my DH is progressing, nothing new there. But tonight an overwhelming sadness hit me. His fear when he calls my name not knowing where I am, him thanking me when I get him dressed and…
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How to handle delusions
I know the advice for handling delusions - don't argue, sympathize, redirect… But, what happens when that no longer works, because eventually it won't. My husband is moderate to severe and I know it is only going to get worse. Please don't suggest a memory care facility, that's not an option.
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Should you tell a dementia patient that what they think really happened did not
my mother is in early to mid stage of dementia from vascular changes and Alzheimer’s disease. She is either hallucinating things or dreaming g them and then insisting that they really happened. She then gets very anxious and angry about what she thinks happened Should we tell her that these things did not occur? How do we…