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Henry my hubby of 43 years now free from Alzheimers and pain
after a horrible day before he passed peacefully last night. My kids and grandkids heartbroken. Does not seem real. Woke up and looked at his bed as usual to see how he is and realized ...... : (
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Intro - Mom w/ Alzheimer's; Dad w/ Cardiac & vision issues
Hi all! I'm an only child so the sole caretaker of my parents. Dad & I had been noticing Mom's memory issues for several years. She also has mobility issues due to lack of exercise. Dad had a heart attack in January of 2022 and was in the hospital for a few days. During that time I lived with mom and noticed significant…
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This is my intro (long)
Sorry, long post inbound. My mother, 84, smoked from teenager up until her mid seventies. College educated, very intelligent , sweet and kind, loves her family, art and nature. Eight years ago had the flu, which led to a seizure, which Drs presumed was due to low sodium. In the hospital for a few days. The first night she…
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Mom's Attitude
Hello All - New to the board but have been reading a lot. Thank you to everyone that shares, I know I am not alone. We moved my Dad into AL in February. My Dad had colon cancer in 2019 and did very well with surgery and chemo. After the chemo was done my mom felt something was off and went to his family doctor and then a…
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This is it
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Stage 7A
My father is 91 and with hospice in stage 7A. His appetite is decreasing and l know it won’t improve such as mine would if I didn’t feel like eating temporarily. He uses a walker, slowing day by day. I have been offered the notion appetite stimulants could be given. iF l want them to be. I don’t see this as a good idea and…
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Hubby has stopped eating and drinking
hospice put a catheter in Saturday as he did not void for 24 hours He has only eaten maybe one full snackpack of pudding since friday and stopped drinking from his sippy cup I am swabbing his mouth. He tried to talk when he is "awake" but we only understand a few. My son brought his boxer over, my husband LOVES that dog.…
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One month later...
Moved mom end of February. First week, I was told she was doing really well. As far as nursing care went, I agreed. Diaper rash got better. Then they moved her to the secured side. She got bad diaper rash again, and she has a chest cold, an no one noticed. I had to say something three times to three different people from…
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Intro - I'm new to all this
Hi and thank you for being here! Apologies in advance for being lengthy. My dad was diagnosed at some point before Covid. I'd had my suspicions but it wasn't a topic my mom would talk about. I live several hours away and there has been some estrangement over the years. And my parents, especially mom, keeps every bit of…
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Residential home MC vs Large facility MC
I'm taking care of both my mother and my DW. My DW is deep into Alz and my mother is showing some memory issues as well. My mother is living with me so it is very challenging dynamic taking care of both. I'm going to have to move my mother but the last AL facility she was in noticed an increase in her confusion and will…
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What to do: working mom with 1 year old baby, family member with suspected dementia
Hi everyone, I'm new to this caregiver journey and looking for a place to share my story and any advice/words appreciated. I am a working mom with 1 year old baby. Recently, my husband and I came to suspect my mother-in-law to have dementia/Alzheimer's. I only learnt about this recently, but apparently for the past year…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 3/30/23
DECIDE TO LOVE * Kind: Having a benevolent, courteous, friendly, generous, gentle, liberal, sympathetic, or warm-hearted nature or disposition, marked by consideration for – and service to – others. From: Wiktionary Free Dictionary 1 Corinthians 13: 4 AMP …love is kind and thoughtful… * me: When we choose to be kind and…
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Need to care for myself...What to do with MOM
Hello, I have medical procedure scheduled in April which may require multiple days in hospital and weeks of downtime/recovery (medical second option pending). Has anyone had experience with placing 90 year-old mom or what to do for planning her care during this period (i.e. 3-4 weeks). As an only child and mom's medical…
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MRI Results(3)
I am not sure if this post is appropriate for this forum but here goes. My wife has had symptoms of dementia for over 3 years but we only recently had her primary care physician consulted. The 10 minute test scored very poorly and he requested an MRI. I read the results of the MRI and discussed them with the PCP. It seems…
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Father wants to return to former residence
My now 96 yo father has dementia and is in a progressive decline. After a safety issue in his former residence in May, 2022, my siblings and I encouraged him to move into AL. He agreed. That was in October, 2022. About two weeks after we moved him in, he began to call everyone, wanting to get the movers back, to take him…
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“Breathing on his own”
Three out of the last four days my dad has called to say once that he thought he was dying and twice that he has to “breathe on his own”. I think by saying breathing on his own that means he thinks he needs to concentrate on breathing or he won’t. He has been in AL for about 2.5 months now. When he says this I have had a…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 3/28/23
HOW DO WE LOVE? Wiktionary Free dictionary Patient: (of a person) Willing to wait if necessary; not losing one's temper while waiting. Constant in pursuit or exertion; persevering; calmly diligent. Serenity: The state of being serene; calmness; peacefulness. A lack of agitation or disturbance. * 1 Corinthians 13:4 …Love…
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What decisions can mom still make?
Mom was diagnosed with dementia. We went to a lawyer who was very good at explaining what should be done in very clear simple terms. I was appointed durable power of attorney financial and my brother and I for medical. Since the lawyer allowed her to sign these papers my brother now believes she is still able to make all…
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MIL is now in MC doing worse
My 81-year-old MIL is now starting to hold saliva in her mouth. She also will not move unless someone get her up. What does this mean? She does not have a bowel for 7 to 8 days without otc help and wants to drink very little. She will eat and wants to eat everything her appetite goes up and down, but when she eats, she…
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I WANT TO GO HOME(3)
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Calls 10 times a day and asks if I’m visiting
I don’t want to take her phone (we’re not there yet). I just can’t take calls while at work and even when I tell her I can’t talk, she will call again and again and again until I pick up and say “I’m so sorry but I’m busy and can’t talk.” She’s in an AL/MC facility but is lonely between meals. She also asks every day if…
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Guardianship(8)
My question is whether or not we should consider Guardianship. I have DPOA and Medical DPOA. However, Dad has moved in with an old girlfriend (Geri) who used to work with him, and she's been waiting years for him to decide to be with her. She's a lonely old lady who is desperate to be with Dad. He doesn't remember how they…
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Kicked out of MC
DH is kicked out of MC for violent behavior that could have been curtailed with competent staff. What do I tell the memory care places I am looking to move him to.
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How do I enjoy this?
I so appreciate this forum. I am grateful to be able to post here and read advice from others that understand this impossible journey. My mom is late stages of Alzheimer’s. I am mourning the mom that I raised me and I’m informed in what processes so I know where this is going. I have been told often to enjoy my time with…
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Dealing with mom that may have alcoholism and dementia, symptoms of bvFTD
My mom moved in with us about 3 years ago. My aunts were telling me a year prior that she was drinking alot (she was never a big drinker), and calling them late at night screaming at them. She said some hurtful things to them. I didn't believe them and we moved her in. When she is left alone I thought she might be drinking…
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Getting someone to go to a doctor for diagnosis
I have a close friend who lives out of state who developed memory issues and hallucinations in the past five months. I contacted her husband and brother to seek assistance in getting medical attention for her. They scheduled an appointment with a neurologist for today but she wouldn't go. The people who are close to her…
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Who should be on the care team?
So a while ago now, my mother's geriatric doctor diagnosed her with "mild cognitive impairment." He diagnosed donepizil. Since mom is very healthy otherwise for her 83 years, we only see him twice a year and he's always astounded how well she's doing other than her mind. According to him, mom's dementia is "proceeding as…
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Help Getting Parent to See a Doctor
Mom has some form of dementia. Sometimes recognizing to a small degree. Won't go to a doctor. I am struggling with helping as she doesn't like accepting help so most often won't. Gets angry when I don't go along with delusions. Just struggling.
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Holiday
Easter will be the first holiday since my dad went to AL. In the past week he has been focused again on how long he will be there and things regarding his home. I have not taken him out of AL since he went in at the end of December. I am afraid because he doesn’t understand how AL works and I believe he thinks he is in…
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FYI- Time Travel
Just a heads up- many, but not all, of the threads currently on the first page of this forum are "zombies" from 2021. Many of those members are no longer participating and would not see a reply if you made one.