-
More than a man
My wife asked me today if I was OK, and I replied I was OK for an old man. She said, "You're more than a man." She's right. I'm a caregiver, a husband, a lover, a friend, a father, a brother, a teacher, a writer, a gardener, and more. You are more than a man/woman too.
-
Anger and delusions all day
My DH is in a rehabilitation facility after a fall in which he fractured his neck. He has to wear a neck brace for about 3 months. He is doing very well in therapy. He has a history of anger, paranoia, agitation, and and infidelity delusions. He has had these episodes in the facility but, unlike today has been over the top…
-
Talking gibberish in his sleep
hi Wondering if any caregivers in the group have experienced constant nonsense talk during the night. My DH with Alzheimer's, will sound like he's carrying on a conversation, but it doesn't make sense. It's a rambling on that keeps me awake, and startles him awake when he gets loud or angry, in his sleep. If I try to wake…
-
help with anger and corrections
I'm 52 female, my DW is 66, recently diagnosed. We are in early stages of this journey - not a lot of memory issues, but trouble figuring out how to open doors, remembering to eat, figuring out how things work like showers, clothes, etc. I have a lot to learn, but would love some pointers on what to do about the anger -…
-
dealing with our LO's anger
My DW have vascular dementia (sorry I can't use the acronym VD😂). About a year ago she became angry and has stayed that way. I spent every day trying to do things that would make her happy to no avail. I placed her in MC 3 months ago. She remains angry and upset with me. I visit her daily for about an hour. The first 30…
-
Informing others of diagnosis
I was wondering if I should mention to acquaintances that my DH is showing signs of Alzheimer’s. Sometimes we meet up with friends we haven’t seen in a long time and my DH has gotten to the point where he has very little to say or when he does say something it shows his memory is not normal. I don’t know whether to mention…
-
When do you decide to place your spouse in a Facility
My husband is only 61. The confusion started 3 years ago. In the last 7 weeks he has decided fast - no longer uses the restroom, does not eat, have to force him. Can stay up for 2 to 3 days with our much sleep (cat naps - 15 to 30 minutes), constantly pacing, has left the house in the middle of the night with no shoes,…
-
Not sure how to feel
The last week of February my DH and myself tested positive for covid. Two weeks later we tested negative and his symptoms seem to have went away, but on the 19th of March we took him to the ER for a totally different issue when they found he has pneumonia and spent 3 days in the hospital. They said he tested positive for…
-
Hi I'm 10 second Louie!!
So if you have ever seen the movie 50 first dates with Adam Sandler I am currently living with "10 second Tom" this weekend. For those who have not seen the movie it starts Drew Barrymore as a young girl who was in car accident and has brain trauma. This trauma caused it so that her brain resets every night and she relives…
-
MCI Diagnosis
My DH has been diagnosed with MCI after a fairly brief evaluation from a neurologist (with review of his MRI and bloowork). It appears that this is an umbrella term that could mean any number of things, so I'm confused about his actual diagnosis. I'm contemplating getting a more detailed neuropsych evaluation but hear that…
-
Advice on Deed
I need to get some advice from you folks on what to do with our home deed. The deed is in both my and my DW name. It is also included in our Trust. I will probably need to sell house to help defray the costs of MC some day. When and if we get to that day, my DW will probably not be able to sigh any documents. I do have a…
-
Feeling Fragile
I feel so sad. My DH of 54 years has VD stage 5 or 6 our partnership over the years has been so strong, we've worked together in our own business, sailed together, flown together, had our children together, and always relied on and supported each other, and now it's just me calling all the shots. I love him dearly and I am…
-
stability issues at toilet
DH is becoming more unstable in general, he hasn't fallen much -yet- but I'm looking for suggestions using the toilet. He is trying to see if he can pee sitting down, but standing is such an ingrained habit it may not be workable. He needs something to hold onto whether he sits or stands. I have heard the suggestion to put…
-
Age 59 early onset with a six year
My husband (currently separated) is in the early stages of being diagnosed. There is a months long wait to get into a neurologist to get an official diagnosis. Meanwhile, I’m now a 41 year old single mom to six year old. His undiagnosed symptoms have caused financial ruin for our family. He isn’t able to work and is…
-
Homecare
I’d like to get a caretaker come over twice a week for a few hours. Where do I begin to search? And hubby likes sleeping until 10:30 or so. Therefore I should have the person over when he’s up and about? Thx
-
Caring for spouse
my DH has EO dementia. He has an alcohol use disorder. He has guns as we live in the country and have chickens. He is 82 and I’m 83. I at a loss as to how to deal with everything and my family is worried about his gun use against me in his mental condition. I need help.
-
cognitive vs ADLs
I expect that some of you have been in the situation I am in with my DW. Her neurologist described her condition as "severe" last week at a 6-month evaluation, but then went on to say that her ADLs are good and she is physically ok. That leaves me wondering if one is more important than the other regarding the need for MC.…
-
Hospice benefits
My DH was just approved for hospice services. He has been in a pretty rapid decline since moving into a wonderful residential memory care home in November 2024. While I am grateful that his remaining time with this wretched disease may be limited, am having trouble figuring out what value add the hospice services might…
-
Seizure that came with a gift
My husband had a seizure Tuesday morning. It was the scariest thing I’ve been through on this journey . It started with him yelling and screaming. Then his limbs began posturing . Finally he went completely rigid and his head tilted back and his breaths came in puffs. He bit his tongue and it began to bleed. When it was…
-
She Is Dancing With The Angels
My wife Linda’s journey of this earth ended this afternoon. I have mentioned several times in my post how she loved to dance and she continued dancing almost to the very end. I attached the link below of her dancing. She contracted Covid 3 weeks ago which lead to an infection that got out of control. She passed peacefully…
-
Hypersexuality
Its been a long time since I've posted, but his hypersexuality is much worse. He is not angry, or mean, or delusional, just talks about sex non stop. The only thing that makes me feel better is that I have caregivers who aren't nt phased by it, having seen it a million times. It makes me feel like I'm in a more normal world
-
Unexpected peaceful moment
I just wanted to share with those who would understand. Tonight, I had one of those truly unanticipated moments of peace and dare I say joy? After getting DH into bed, I poured myself an adult beverage, stepped out onto the patio, sat in my chair, and listened to the wind blowing in the trees (it’s really gusting here in…
-
Giving up
My dh is in stage 4,also has vd and multiple health issues. Does all his adls. He appetite is poor,has lost alot of weight. Yes I have tried boost and any thing he will eat. Was talking with him this morning. Ask him if point plank are you giving up? He said why? I said your getting weaker and your voice is getting weaker.…
-
funny
DH has started Kisunla. I told him we were going to leave soon for his infusion. He asked why we were going as he had enough confusion and didn’t need more.
-
Questions about Vascular Dementia
My husband was diagnosed Nov 2024 with Vascular Dementia following a MRI. In looking back the signs were present around 3 years ago……..but I the time we didn’t know it was Vascular Dementia. He had a “spell” Feb 2022 that was diagnosed as ketoacidosis due to being a non-compliant diabetic. In looking back to this day there…
-
Struggling to get him to do anything
DH is becoming more and more resistant to things he needs to do, like changing clothes, brushing teeth, washing. Maybe I created this problem myself in the way I’ve been handling it but I’m at a loss as to what to do next. He used to get undressed at bedtime no problem, so could slip clean underwear and clothes at that…
-
Follow up on Blount Alzheimer’s Center Cuts.
I was devastated by the cutbacks at the Blount Cenetr for Alzheimer’s research. There is no cure for for my DH, but I know the Center is working so that my children and grandchildren will be spared this vile disease. Not expecting much, I contacted my congressperson. A few days later, my congressperson phoned me! He…
-
Onesies
My spouse is about Stage 6 and has lived in memory care/assisted living for 2 1/2 years now. He has moved from the more independent through the middle and is now in the section where residents require the most care. The nurse called me this week and said he is peeing wherever he is, and wonders if I mind them trying him…
-
All alone
This is a sad story. My partner (F) and I (M) are both 75. We have been together almost 33 years. She is the love of my life. Over three years ago we moved far away to a new area which is more affordable so we could retire. We have only each other. There are no children, family or friends. After we moved, she developed…
-
Repetitive questions
How do you deal with the repetitive questions? My DH is driving me nuts. He will ask the same question 8 times or more in the course of 15 or 20 mins. Then later it will start all over. I know it is not his fault but my patience is wearing thin. I have my own health problems (Pancreatic cancer) which he is oblivious to( no…