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Heartbroken but comforted DH No Longer Suffering
It’s been a rough road for a while. My DH ended up in hospital before being transferred to palliative. He died peacefully 7 days later. We will miss him being physically here; however, we are at peace knowing he is no longer suffering. I thank this group for being so authentic and raw in questions and answers. I’ve gone…
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Sleeping almost all the time now
My DH is declining. He was probably only awake 2-3 hours yesterday. Hospice has brought a hospital bed here because many days I can’t walk him to the bedroom. Yesterday it took me and the caregiver just to get him from the hospital bed to the chair. What can I expect from here? He still eats but not as much. For those of…
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how do you talk to an elderlaw attorney?
I'm in the beginning stages of talking to a (not officially certified) elderlaw attorney. We already have wills, health care proxies, etc., but I wanted another pair of eyes to see whether we missed something. Here's my problem. DW has anosognosia and gets angry at any suggestion that she has a problem. How can I discuss…
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Now We Wait
Last Thursday was the last time my DW got out of bed. She’s been in and out of consciousness for most of that time, not eating or drinking much. Tiny amounts. Hospice nurse believes she is transitioning and I agree, though of course she could rally. She mentioned days to a few weeks. I don’t know if it’s these years of…
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The end is near
Today I was informed by the hospice nurse that they think my DW is in the very final stage. She is having difficulty swallowing and is taking in very little food or liquid. Yesterday she had only a few partial spoons of puréed food and juice. Today they are no longer able to give her medication as pills and so they will…
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Our mailbox relocated itself...
Occasionally (or maybe frequently) I like to pretend everything is normal and then something very strange happens that snaps me back to reality. Last week it was DH calling me to tell me that he went to get our mail and that someone had removed our mailbox and reattached it in a new location. After a few minutes of me…
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Update posted in comments - Move forward with hip surgery for DH?
I'm still not positive what stage my DH is in, but guessing stage 4 with some symptoms on 5 creeping in. Some days he seems close to "normal" and then there are days that are the opposite. He's still able to care for himself and even fixes dinner for us now and again. Still does his usual chores around the house. Withthat…
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How long has it been
I don't know any of you but I have told you more about me and my situation then I have told anyone else in the world. That seams kind of odd to me. I can't tell my own kids what is and has really happened. So I would like to share more about the people that I shared life details with. My wife of 50 years (we got married…
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Peeing all over himself
My DH with mixed dementia has started having accidents in the bathroom. Some of the urine goes into the toilet the rest ends up on the toilet, floor. He wets his pats and urine runs down his leg into his shoes. His shoes are washable but they need hours to dry. I bought him sone washable slippers so that I can get through…
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A suggestion for early to midstage caregivers
I have learned so much from those of you who share your experiences with this awful disease. To stay I was depressed and overwhelmed when I learned my DH has VD is an understatement. You have taught me so much about this disease, it's progression, what to watch out for, how to prepare myself as best I can for what is…
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An even sadder Day
I'm back home, sadly, Donna didn't make it. Due to there being no traffic I got to the hospital an hour before her pickup time (better early than late). When they brought her to me she was crying but I calmed her down by telling her she be home with Jazzy soon. Then we took a short walk, about 100 feet, to the car. Half…
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Feeling sorry for myself
Just got finished cleaning a foot of snow off and away from my car. Im 70 my husband who has alz and vd was in the house watching TV. Just having a woo is me day. Don't need to answer Just needed to vent. Thanks
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Sitting Vigil
I am sitting vigil tonight at DH's bedside. It took three tries to insert a new Foley catheter this morning. Each insertion in recent months had been more and more difficult. He began bleeding out. He has an enlarged prostate and a latent tumor that he's had for 23 years. He may have a new tumor, too. He has lost a great…
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Not one to post pics or memes, but this struck a chord
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His Battle Has Ended
The love of my life, my DH Joe, lost his battle with dementia on October 31. He was diagnosed 15 years ago and progression was slow until the last year when he was in memory care. It broke my heart to move him there but it got to the point where I couldn't keep him or myself safe. Hardest decision of my life. In Aug/Sept,…
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Why isn't Alzheimer's mentioned more?
So, here we all are. Why isn't Alzheimer's and dementia talked about more in our society? It's crippling and life-altering to us caregivers and our loved ones. My DW has it. Her mother has it. Her grandmother had it. My dad had it. My uncle had hit. My brother-in-law's brother has it and my 1st cousins wife has it. It's an…
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NEED TO FIND A SUPPORT GROUP in or NEAR LOVELAND, COLORADO
My wife of 46+ years is developing dementia. I'll confess it's pretty heavy for me at present. I need to find a support group for myself and maybe with her in the Loveland or Berthoud, Colorado area. I do not want to go as far as Fort Collins - an hours drive and it's a college town. She is 78 and I'm 79 and a retired…
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Stages of Alz
I see many mentions of stages that your loved one is at. Where can I find this information. My DH is in the later stages but I'm curious which one and how it is defined. Thank you.
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Relieved, sad, brutalized, and bewildered
My spouse passed away yesterday. Diagnosed with MCI/EOAD after a spinal tap 11/2021 age 61 Hospice 6/2025 age 65 Died at home 1/21/2025 age 65 Early onset can go fast, but that young heart can keep going at the brutal, brutal end. 6 days with no food or water, 2 days of agonal gasping. Excruciating. I am so glad it is over…
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wandering
With so many of you having concerns about your LO wandering from the home,I thought I'd mention child locks on the outside doors. I installed these at the top of the door, above eye height, and my DH has no idea they are there. Even if he did, he does not have the dexterity or the mental capacity to figure out how to slide…
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Parietal or Atypical Alzheimers
I’m just wondering if anyone out there has a loved one with parietal Alzheimer’s. My DH’s AD is on the left parietal lobe. This is a very different path than the usual AD. His first symptoms were severe deficits in Math. We noticed he kept over tipping waitresses, who didn’t mind at all. His social skills were the same for…
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I Would Pay Money for a Little Anosognosia
As my DW loses her ability to speak and has started becoming more anxious and paranoid, she will say to me, "I am about to lose it all." and then she'll cry. So I cry and think of how utterly unfair it is that she knows, really knows that her brain is failing her. I know her thinking she has nothing wrong would bring it's…
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Sad for DH, sad for me
The other night when DH came in to visit and have his nightly glass of wine, he started talking about some money that was deposited from a small income source and then tried explaining to me why the money was so little. This income source was in the field he had spent his entire working career in, but he couldn't find the…
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My DW is always hot, then cold, then cold, then hot. Repeat...
I was wondering if anyone else has experienced this phenomenon. My DW is always complaining about being too cold. I then turn up the thermostat, and she then complains that she's too hot. So, I turn the thermostat back down. The process repeats and the hot and cold complaints are less than a minute or two of each other.
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Wants me near always
My husband only wants me with him to care for him - no relatives or caregivers. He wants me around all the time and if I leave the house, he forgets where I am and thinks I am dead, even with reminders from the relative or caregiver with him. He worries the whole time I am gone. I am his everything, which is a lot to…
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How to respond / deal with the almost obsessive past work talk
My DH was diagnosed with Alz over a year ago. As with most of us I was noticing signs for 3 years prior to diagnosis. I'd say he's into early stage 5. He is still able to care for himself and do most things around the house. Of course he repeats his past stories, and asks alot of repeated questions. I'm dealing with those…
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Saturday night
this is what Saturday night looks like at our place 🥲. How about yours? Lol
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I feel so alone and lost at times
My husband was diagnosed with "MCI with a vascular presentation." The loss of his short term memory is jaw dropping. I'm observing a slow decline in him, but then some days, he seems "OK." I've noticed when he is around other people that do not see him on a daily basis, outwardly he seems fine. His adult children do not…
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What Is Respite?
I’m so tired from 24 hours and going of aimless, but harmless, wandering, but, but… Today I have a caregiver for three hours. DW is accepting of her today. My respite is the garage door up with a soft rain, sitting in a lawn chair with the door into the garage locked so my DW stays with the caregiver, sitting here…
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How long survive without fluids
my DH has been put on hospice. He is in hospital. He has had zero fluids for 3 days. He’s on morphine and Valium. His BP is still good, good oxygen, had some mottling which is now back to normal, strong pulse. He had death rattle which is now gone. Has anyone had this experience?