-
Startle response
My wife is in early to mid stage 7. When I arrived to see her she was sleeping but awoke shortly. After a short moment, her whole body jumped like she was startled. This happened about eight times within a couple of minutes. Does anyone know if this means anything?
-
Nights are the worst...
I'm sure I'm not alone with dreading the nighttime and my DH with VD's increased agitation. He does well during the day but when he goes to bed, he is asleep within 5 minutes but his sleep is so restless. He is up and down all night going to the restroom, pulling, fighting with and getting entangled in the sheets and…
-
visit with PCP
We had a regular visit with our PCP today. As is often the case, our loved ones are further along than we recognize or admit. I have my DW in early stage 6. The PCP evaluated both of us and said I should start looking into memory care facilities. The good ones have waiting lists and I am supposed to be prepared for the…
-
Toileting Issues
I need some ideas … my husband (with Alz) is urinating while standing up and is terrible aim! I am tired of cleaning pee from the toilet, the back of the toilet, the floor, etc. multiple times a day. Does anyone know of a product that would cover those areas?
-
Anyone With Resentment?
I'm going to post this before I chicken out. I have been married to my husband for 42 years. Now he has Alzheimer's/vascular dementia. Even in good times he could be difficult to live with, very controlling. Now I am bitterly resentful because I have to take care of him. Has anyone experienced this. I feel guilty and…
-
My DH is getting increasingly aggressive and hard to handle
My DH is very restless and agitated, and always wants something to do. The problem is, when I can't go out with him - ex. at 6:00 a.m. today he wanted to go for a bike ride - then he gets loud and aggressive and says he will go anyway. Today he started for the door and said he was going. He gets lost in our apartment…
-
I moved DW to memory care (part 2)
So, that's the background. All of our family and friends were supportive of placing DW in MC, even urging me to do so, reminding me that I had to take care of myself. The conundrum for me was, how was I going to get her in the door? How was I going to get her things to the MC facility? One suggestion was to say her doctor…
-
Home care hopefully will help ?
After struggling with the thought of bringing in help only because so far my DW has made it clear that no one but no one was going to come in and help . She has stuck to she just wants me and her . Well I can't keep watching her get weaker because of not eating hardly, and if course I have not been able to get her bathed.…
-
"Girlfriend" in Memory Care
DH has been in MC a little over 2 weeks, he just stopped packing up to go home every day, and seemed to be acclimating. Now, he is attached to a woman in MC! I know it happens often, and is supposedly innocent, but I have found them in his room. It is not so innocent. His wedding ring is missing, today, when I went to…
-
I moved DW to memory care (part 1)
This is my (very long) saga of moving DW to memory care, and how we reached that point. I hope you will find it interesting, if not useful. I used to participate in this forum until a few months ago. Then DW's condition made it impossible. She needed my attention, demanded my attention. I remember reading other people's…
-
Advice!!
I am new to the group and need advice. My Mom has late stages Alzheimer’s and has been able to be alone for part of the day while I work. This week every day she has been scared, anxious and leaves the house and then cannot figure out how to get back. I have a caregiver but she only comes from 12 to 1 as that is all I can…
-
Managing Incontinence
I’m new here. My DH was diagnosed about 2 years ago with FTD and possible ALZ. We are now dealing with incontinence. I am ok with pull-ups but he has a bad habit of missing the toilet and peeing on the bathroom marble floor. I try to get him to go to the bathroom on a schedule but he just won’t cooperate. I’m not sure he…
-
Anyone have a solution to avoid loosing wallet or money?
This is the third time this week hubby has misplaced money but this time he lost his wallet. He is still capable of going to store himself and I don't want to take that away from him yet. Any ideas on how to avoid this?
-
New/old member back again
Quite a few years ago I was a member of this forum to get support helping care for an elderly family member. Unfortunately I'm back again because my DH has now been diagnosed with Neurocognitive Disorder. His issues are caused by encephalopathy caused by an autoimmune disease he's had for decades and we have been told it…
-
Depakote or Haldol for agitation and combativeness?
I'm reaching out once again to this group of fellow travelers down this road none of us has chosen. My DH is 77 and in stage 6 of his dementia - in Memory Care since last July. He is still quite strong and has become very combative when showering is attempted. Just wondering if anyone has had experience with either or both…
-
I CANT DO IT!!!
I'm 39yo female caring for the kindest, all giving to anyone in need 45yo EOA bf. I hate this f**cing disease so bad. Tomorrow i have an assessment with the facility i plan to put my loved one in. The fast track to get him into MC is via hospice. We had that intake on friday. My anxiety is at a high right now and I'm…
-
Mild Cognitive Impairment
This is my first post. In July 2023 I noted to family that my 81 year-old DW was having significant memory problems. In January 2024 she was diagnosed with Mild Cognitive Impairment (MCI). I am particularly interested in others who have a LO diagnosed with MCI and for how many years or did it eventually progress to a more…
-
New Here - Looking for help for brother
Hello, I've been lurking and reading discussions for a few months now. Our family became concerned last fall. The ball got rolling after I scheduled the PCP appointment my brother had been procrastinating. That was in Feb. A few weeks later we got in to see the neurologist. He scored 22 out of 30 on the assessment that was…
-
The guilt trip
-
On the hard days…
-
Dental problems
My DH who is in stage 6/7 has been having problems with his teeth for at least a year. He has several front teeth that have decay and lost a crown several months ago that the dentist was not able to replace because of decay underneath it. He said he would likely need about 7 teeth pulled. The dentist said he was unlikely…
-
How do you talk to your DH about worsening symptoms you are seeing?
My DH (66) was diagnosed with the beginning stages of Alzheimers 18 or so months ago. A bit of back story - he is proud, stubborn and still trying to come to terms with what is happening to him. His mother has Alzheimers and my father had Alzheimers as well before passing away. He knows what is coming and there are days…
-
body jerking while sleeping
My DH has started having jerking motions with his arms, hands, legs, head, or body while sleeping, not all at the same time but for about 3 to 4 hours some part of his body is moving. Some are minor but some are pretty strong. If his arm is around me and his arm jerks, sometimes it will have enough force for me to be glad…
-
dealing with our LO's anger
My DW have vascular dementia (sorry I can't use the acronym VD😂). About a year ago she became angry and has stayed that way. I spent every day trying to do things that would make her happy to no avail. I placed her in MC 3 months ago. She remains angry and upset with me. I visit her daily for about an hour. The first 30…
-
What should we be hoping for?
Several years back, after months of testing and imaging, we got the EO ALZ diagnosis from the neurologist. Prior to the diagnosis, upon our first visit, I noticed all the rooms we used at neurology has many boxes of tissues. I thought that was odd, but we eventually found out why there were there. Going into this, I…
-
How accurate are estimated time of stage 6 & 7 ?
When my DW was diagnosed with early onset (Oct 2021), we were told she was stage 4. Just recently I took a really close look at the clinical stages and it seems we are now clearly in the early part of stage 6. Last time I saw our social work was about a year ago and she said our rate of progression appears "typical". My DW…
-
Clothing for Stage 6-7?
My DH is stage 6, I’ve switched to pull up pants instead of button up. They are easier to get on and off. I’ve been going through his clothing, he was such a fashion fanatic and has a great wardrobe, but should I let the button up pants, shorts go? Has anyone felt at this stage that button ups are better for any reason?
-
Periodic changes in behavior getting more concerning
My wife was diagnosed with Alz 5 years ago at 65 years old. She has a strong family history on her Mom's side and we noticed concerns at least 2 years prior. Her memory decline was slow the first couple of years and then I started to notice more pronounced changes at roughly 3 month intervals. This winter she started to…
-
Collateral damage from dementia
I am sole caretaker for DH with VD for several years. Like all of you, we care, show up everyday, we do our best, yet this awful disease affects us too. It not only affects our mental and physical health but also our relationships with friends and family. My 2 grown sons live on the opposite coast and I have not seen them…
-
Spouse not eating or drinking enough .
I seem to have come to a difficult time with my DW on eating and drinking and taking a shower . She keeps telling me no to all those things that are important . This issue I know will probably turn bad but I would like to know if anyone has any input on this matter . P.s I've tried mostly everything that has been suggested…