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I need help
Hi, I’m Janet. I take care of my husband with Alzheimer’s. I would really like to talk to someone going through the same things. He is in the moderate stage and is 77, I’m 73.
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POSITIVE BALANCE
When I was a caregiver, I was on a seesaw. One side was attending to the needs of those I cared for, and the other side was attending to my own needs. Both sides were important. Both sides needed attention. The aim was to keep the seesaw balanced so one side did not go crashing to the ground. Perhaps looking back, I…
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Compartmentalizing - avoiding my own behavior changes
I think this is about compartmentalizing. Let me know if the following makes sense, My caretaking behavior is starting to leak into my interactions with non PWDs. For example, some of my "conversation" w/ PWD is just repeating what they say. "Yes, it's sunny today". Or it can be agreeing with nonsense statements, or…
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Dh went home
I haven’t written much in a while because of the fast progression that has been happening with my husband. Took him to the VA ER last Friday thinking maybe he had a UTI, he had so many of the symptoms, except for saying “I want to die, why can’t I just die “. They kept him in the hospital and this Saturday 3/16, he got his…
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Anticipatory Grief and Multilayered Guilt: What Do I Do?!?
*NOTICE: This is a long read. Thank you in advance for being willing to take time to read all of this.* I am a 31-year-old only child of a 78-year-old mother who was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease in 2018 but showed contributory signs of the disease in 2015. I am a part-time college instructor who has chosen to move…
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Monthly illness
My sister gets sick on a monthly basis. She has nausea, chills, and sometimes vomiting. Once a month, almost like clockwork. She is 74, was checked by her doctor, and it’s not a UTI. She is diabetic, but nothing has changed in her diet. After each episode, she appears to be worse mentally. It’s like a switch that triggers…
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Aricept and Namenda debate
Hello friends, I do not post often but surely keep up here as my lifeline in the journey. Your advice in the past as been so beneficial, I thought I would put my question out there and see what the ‘experts’ (literally) think.. So we are in late stage 6 I believe. In January it was specified DH’s dementia was likely Lewy…
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Are We Out of Options?
My father in law is still inpatient at the Geri psych unit pending placement and the facility keeps telling us he will be released him every day stating they can’t continue to hold him since from their standpoint he is cleared. I have filed an appeal to the discharge but my husband and I have been scrambling trying to find…
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My mother just diagnosed. We saw it coming...
I just wanted to say hello and that I'm grateful to have a resource such as this! My mother is in independent living, never forgets to go to lunch or play a game, but often repeats herself, short term memory is a challenge, loses keys, hides things, moves around her pictures and decor. She does not enjoy watching TV (never…
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After a stroke what should we watch for suspicious of altzimers or dementia
Someone in the home had a stroke a couple of years ago and did very little recovery assistance. Now told to live a normal life. Showing aggression, slurred speech, forgetting things, hygiene issues, bladder issues. Possible depression and lack or motivation spends 10 or more hours a day watching TV. How do we help is…
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Newbie Questions
Hello, I just started posting this weekend after having read for a few months. My brother is a few years away from turning 65, and a few days away from his MRI. His wife speaks english as a second language, so they've asked me to be actively involved helping him through this. One of the old discussions I read recently was…
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Frustrating vent
I am getting tired! Typical morning I get up make coffee and start picking up what DH has "put in a safe place" during the night. He sits on the couch and drinks his coffee as I make him breakfast. Knocks it over so I have to clean the coffee table and the rug. His remark "Isn't that why they call it a coffee table?" than…
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A new diagnosis
Recently the diagnosis for my spouse is vascular dementia. I do not know what to do next or what help to get. I would appreciate any suggestions. Thank you
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I Am On My Own Now
I continue to go to this site numerous times a day - the empathy and experience of the participants here is the best support I have found. I am in a place now where a lot of you have found yourself in - I'm alone in this horrible ambiguous grief cycle called Alzheimer's. Bill posted "The Calvary is not Coming" and I read…
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No more driving
My husband has Alzheimers and recently took a road test for triple A at his doctor's suggestion. I found out the results yesterday and it didn't go well at all. How did you break the news to them that they had to stop driving? He's only 73.
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Just need to vent
After reading so much about the trials that so many of you have I feel bad about whining about my situation. My DW is really very easy to care for, her short term memory is pretty much gone and she seems to live in the moment, with no concerns about yesterday or tomorrow but she takes care of her own ADL's and is quite…
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Children of parent's who have died from Alzheimer's
I have been the caregiver for my mother for the last 16 years. This August she died from the disease. I have not been able to find a single book or group about this and find it very frustrating. I thought since I grieved the loss of my mother for the 16 years that her death would be easier. Stupid I know....this is hard as…
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Care facility
My mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s about 4-5 years ago. This disease killed my father who could not understand what was happening to her and did not have the skills to manage his own emotions. After dad died, we had the home health agency give us a. 24/7 caregiver as a “temporary” solution until we could figure…
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Traveling
Hope you all are hanging in there as best you can. I am sitting on this quiet morning, DW asleep, and enjoying a little time to myself. Well, sort of enjoying. My mind is spinning away about a trip I need to take to visit my parents back in the midwest. A five hour flight, potentially with my DW. I know it will be a…
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Swallowing problems in Alz.
I mentioned this in my question about hospice timing, but still have questions someone might be able to answer. To recap, my husband is 71 and was diagnosed with Early Onset Alzheimer’s and vascular dementia about 8 years ago. He also has diabetes and some other things. He is mostly stage 6 now, and has lots of confusion,…
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Alz in Atx
Hi all – – I just joined the community today because, as many of you can understand, it’s really hard to see your loved one slip away. My mother has had Alzheimer’s for a year or two, and recently she has been very up-and-down with what she is understanding and knowing where she is, etc. She frequently thinks her parents…
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Apple watch and falls
DW was always the techie and now my son in law has the role Everyone insisted I should get an Apple Watch for its fall notification. When your children are as smart as mine you do as you are told. so I got the watch On my recent cruise through the Panama canal I was in Puerto Vallarta Mexico and I tripped on the curb and…
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Running out of steam…for now
This will be mostly a vent session, I think. I’ve been running on empty the last few days. After a few weeks of intense caregiving and helping my youngest son through some unresolved health issues, I’m finding my “endless love” for my husband with Alzheimer’s to be fading & my super positive attitude turning sour. I guess…
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Just saying hello
New to this. I’m Jack and I recently retired to stay home and take care of the wife, who is in the mid stages of Alzheimer’s. We do ok mostly i guess. Sure could use a little more of her boys help. It’s a shame but they just don’t know how bad she’s getting. Cause when they do come we try our best to act normal I guess.…
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Seroquel use in Alzheimer’s patients
DH is very agitated and having hallucinations. Doc prescribed Seroquel. Researching Mayo Clinic said it should not be used for Alzheimer’s patients. I am confused as it is often recommended. Thanks ! !
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POLST Form - Physician Orders for Life-Sustaining Treatment Form - overwhelming
My LO is very, very elderly. She was recently hospitalized and had surgery. We had to make a lot of decisions fast and under pressure in the ER. But luckily it all went as well as could be hoped. She is definitely more fragile than she was before the whole thing but she is doing well. Her physician's practice is all…
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Opinion on moms care
My mom has only been with me 9 months. The first 3 were fine but then it started to really go down hill. See post about my mean mom. Her doctor has recommended she be placed in a home as her behavior is getting a bit aggressive. I have applied for different types of aid and she’s been recently released from the wait list…
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lost
Hi I am new to ALZCONNECTED im not sure where to start. my mom has been diagnose with AlZ. she currently lives with my dad, but my dad is having a really difficult time accepting her diagnosis. he is not willing to educate himself about the disease and has no patience for my mom. he keeps saying he can't go through with…
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Much too fast, much too slow
When we adopted our son as an infant, a wise friend told me that no matter how long we had waited and how hard we had tried to have a child, I was still allowed to wish he would just hush up and go to sleep! I think that’s true for all of us with our PWDs. No matter how awful it will be, we’re allowed to sometimes wish for…