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Coming Home From Respite Question
I’m thinking of putting my DH in respite for 30 days (minimum requirement at facility) so I can have a vacation. He is stage 5 cognitively but able to physically look after personal needs. He can be pretty good during the day but sundowns daily which can get challenging. My questions are if I do put him in MC for 30 days,…
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@M1
I have to thank you for enabling me to finally get some restful sleep. For the past two months I've been awake much of the night, and then sleeping during the day, into the afternoon. I wasn't able to get much done. You had mentioned the term "fragmented sleep" on a response to a member. I asked Dr Google and learned that…
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Shower / bath help
My father has late stage Alzheimers and moved into MC fairly early into the progression. As a result, personal care was handled by staff. So I'm in completely new territory now and in over my head. My parents-in-law have moved in with us as they were no longer able to live alone. They are mobile, able to walk, dress, eat…
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One journey ends and another begins
Like so many lately, my best friend, partner, lover, father to our children died on Sunday, March 24. On his last day, I was at his bedside for 4 hours during which I held his hand, stroked his arm and shoulder and whispered how much I love him, and sang to him, cried an unbelievable amount of tears and told him to rest…
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It's so lonely
hi I am Amy (61) and my husband (64) was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's in June 2023. Since I am also disabled I knew we had to get out of our house and into a care environment before disaster struck. We are in a really nice Assisted Living place now. Currently Ive been feeling lonely even though we're together all…
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Driving saga continues…a long vent sorry
I finally came up with a plan to turnover the RMV letter to my husband. Generally it went pretty well. He was very very upset. Said he did nothing wrong. He didn’t. Said he has a great driving record. He does. Then started asking who would do such an awful thing to him as he did nothing to deserve it. I just kept…
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Is it just me, or...
Sorry I have been absent. Been struggling with the thought that I want to put him into MC so it would be easier for me, not best for him. He seems fine sitting in chair. Seems fine not changing his 12 hour depends because 12 hours hasn't gone by...regardless. seems fine taking 3 hours from the time I suggest going up to…
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Care documents
I tried enrolling my DW in day care a couple of days a week. After all paperwork was completed and just a couple of days before she was to begin, her enrollment was denied due to possible fecal incontinence. (The facility did not have a shower). This information is being mentioned because of things I may have subsequently…
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Question for the younger caregivers
I’m 51 caring for 80 year old spouse. This is a question for people like me who have given up work to be full time care givers. How do you plan for your future? What steps have you taken to stay active and engaged mentally, physically, creatively, socially, and career-wise? What are your plans for returning to paid work…
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Insurance Question re Kaiser Permanente Insurance
I a wondering if there is any one out there that has Kaiser Permanente Insurance along with Medicare. Does Kaiser provide any help with dementia patients such as caregiving or other help for the patient and caregiver?
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need to downgrade mom’s phone
just a quick question! wondering if anyone here has a good verizon phone they could recommend for my mom with AD. she has an iphone now but it is too hard for her to figure out. I really like the format on the Lively from Jitterbug bc of the big fonts and easy to read menu, but she would have to switch networks.
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First time to forum - realized I needed a support group
My DH had AD diagnosis last summer '23. He had declining memory over the past 5 years with all tests - 3 times over those years- MRIs, MRAs, EEGs, etc. and all said Normal. The only test declining was the neuro-psych test which verifies he is down to the Minimum of short term memory. He will be 70 in June - I am 66. It is…
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Wore-Out & Stressed
Hi, i am Reda, i reside in Mphs, Tn with my gorgeous mother(75) who suffered strokes 3 yrs ago & now has Dementia😩😢 & i am New Here & her sole caregiver & i am just physically/ mentally & emotionally wore out + stressed bad. My mom was still able too walk,go to the bathroom & she went into rehab & they neglected her & she…
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How to educate someone to help with PWD
I have a neighbor who has expressed willingness to be a helper/friend to DH. He is retired, nearby, pleasant. Although he has a willing spirit, he has no experience with PWD. Surely there are some easy-to-read pamphlets, etc that will introduce a novice to the overall situation. I don't think my friend wants to know the…
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Need advice--meds, good days, bad days, anticipatory grief
Hi, this is long but I don't know that it can be abbreviated. My mom is 86 and has been having symptoms of dementia for the past couple years. I don't know which kind she has because she has not been formally diagnosed by a neurologist. I suspect it is lewy body. Anyway, it has gotten really bad last November after having…
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Not sure what to make of new behavior.
DH and I until very recently have been able to enjoy a movie or tv show together even if he has trouble following. All of a sudden, he thinks the movie is trying to communicate to him and he asks me to help him write down their instruction so that he can get the key. He becomes very agitated if he can’t get the message and…
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Post-Hospitalization
DH collapsed outside on Saturday. He's 81 with mild/moderate Alzheimers. Good health otherwise. I found him on the woodpile looking near death. He was unresponsive and limp. The hospital could not identify exactly what caused the collapse and it is possible he fell and hit his head. There were stress enzymes (troponin)…
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Respite caregiver struggle
My DW is early/mid stage Alzheimer's. I recently hired a caregiver/respite worker to come for 3 hours a week. He's an experienced fellow and provides not only assurance of her safety but also engaging conversation. She seems engaged with him when he comes but afterward gets angry with me and sad for about a day. I think it…
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Diagnosis
What are the first steps your Dr will take to diagnose ?
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Important article re: significant risks of hospitalization/ER for PWDs
Posting on both sites. This corroborates the experiences many of us have had with hospital or ER intervention causing more harm than good for our PWD LOs. The study focused on fainting or near fainting (syncope) as a reason for the initial hospital contact, but the overarching statements caught my attention and are why we…
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ADL hints
Is there a specific section that discusses how to's of ADL? I'm struggling with toileting. I don't know how to help my sweet husband. Pad boosters, adult briefs, cleaning, etc. I keep thinking I'm making it harder on myself. This diagnosis was a shock to me. How do I adjust, where do I go for help, etc. The one thing that…
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Early incontinence
My DW was formally diagnosed last Oct. However, she tested poorly over three years ago just never had more testing. Her symptoms are mild and she is still very self sufficient. She also has anosognosia so there is no recognition that anything is wrong. Over the last few weeks she has had a little urinary incontinence right…
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Increased confusion after Covid?
A few weeks ago my mom got Covid and had to be hospitalized, which coincided with me being away for 8 days. She is now physically fine, but the MC called the Occupational therapist for increased confusion. It is true she is having more difficulty with words, and some behaviors (e.g. took her shirt off in my car). Can Covid…
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Weight loss in Stage 7, how serious is it?
My DW is now well into Stage 7 and is on hospice. She sleeps 20+ hours a day, and is barely awake the rest of the time. She rarely opens her eyes. She does however still eat puréed food and thickened liquids fairly well, usually finishing most of what is offered her. She has been losing weight for about a year, but the…
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New to this site but not new to dementia
Mom was diagnosed with dementia in 2018, moved to MC in 2019, and passed in Oct 2022. DH was diagnosed with dementia in April 2023. I am his full-time caregiver, with some help from our son and nearing teenage grandson. Mom was in stage 2 when COVID shut everything down. When MC finally reopened for visits she was in stage…
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Boundaries
Hello all, It's been a while since I've written. I've been busy taking care of loved ones. My mother passed away a few months ago, she had dementia and other health issues. My oldest sister also has dementia. She is in assisted living (as was my mother for the last two years of her life). I have been taking care of both of…
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Buying a home solo
DH is Stage 6 Banker said he must be vetted for mortgage and he will be required to sign for mortgage even if I am purchasing based on my income credit etc. I tried to explain he is incompetent and cannot be responsible for anything. Wondering if anyone else ran into this problem. I know it is state by state. This is…
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How to see group discussions
I joined a private group but don't know how to join the discussions of the group. Can someone explain?
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Setting my expectations for symptom relief from medicines
My DH is in early stage 6 Alzheimer's. He has been being treated by a new neurologist for the last six weeks to try to find a combination of prescription medicines that can alleviate his agitation, delusions, and angry outbursts. The doctor has several decades of experience treating people with dementia. So far the…
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Large List of Caregiving Programs
Michael Ellenbogen sent me this large catalog of caregiving programs. I typed in my zip code and got quite a few programs outside my area, but still something useful might come up for caregivers here. https://bpc.caregiver.org/