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First time visiting since he was placed in a nursing home
I'm the daughter of a parent with dementia. My father was in the early stages of dementia the last time I saw him. He was losing his ability to speak clearly, stop frequently, and figure out how to express his thoughts or feelings. That was three or four years ago. His illness spiraled since then and became too difficult…
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Sister Financially Abusing Mom
My 54 year old sister is a narcissist and is the primary caregiver for our mom. Although I use caregiver very loosely. My mom has lived with my sister for 6 years now. The first 4 years while she was married. My sister gets paid by in home support services to “take care” of my mom. Help with meals, bathing, doctors appts,…
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Can't go on like this
So today my husband said "f you" to me while we were in the check out line at the grocery. Everyone in earshot heard. How humiliating. I can add grocery shopping to the list of activities we can no longer do together. And he can't be left alone, so. . .
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How to get her to visit a facility and move ?
We need to move her , we found a good facility ,but they want to meet her first and evaluate her ! She will not accept. She live alone in AL facility, has her meds delivered morning and evening She is morning-downing every day , very agitated ,confused them by afternoon totally normal. She eats ,dresses and bathes on her…
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Pill Management
Hi! Any ideas for pill management from the collective brain our there are appreciated! Here's the dilemma. Every morning, I give my 90-year-old mom with MD her six pills. Every morning, she counts them and questions me. Whatever, I expect that. But in doing so and counting them, she invariably loses one, misplaces it, or…
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"Why did we come in here?"
Today we went for a walk in the morning, as we usually do. When we returned home, the title of this post is what DH said to me. "Because it's our home," I said. "We live here. See, here are our two cats. They live here, too." I get asked a lot of questions, but this one kind of gobsmacked me. DH has been lost in time for…
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Finding local support group
Hi, I’m reaching out because I don’t know how to handle my husband‘s denial any longer. He’s 64 years old and will not see a doctor but has had for the past 10 years memory loss to the point of the past year of not knowing where things are or what he spoke of, every single day. I tried to address it with him. He gets angry…
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Alz medication
My Dh was on namenda and was unable to take it . The neurologist put him on Donepezil hcl . Has been taking it for about 2 weeks. Has been incon of stool 2x now. Is this normal at first or is he progressing. Any way he refuses to take it now. We are running out of meds.
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Struggling at work
Hi, I have not been diagnosed with EO but have a lot of symptoms. (I am 61) I had neuropsych testing 2 years ago and was diagnosed with Mild Cognitive Impairment. I feel like things are getting worse so I scheduled a second neuropsych evaluation in August. Has anyone here gone from MCI to Dementia? Has anyone been…
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Scared and Sad
:'( I am new to this site. I was recently diagnosed with Mild Cognitive Impairment (MCI). I am a 51 year old woman. I have been married to the love of my life for over 25 years. We have a 23 year old daughter. This diagnosis has become devastating news to our family. I am scared, angry, sad, and unsure about what is…
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Recommend an audiobook for a new caregiver?
My mom has recently been diagnosed and my dad is the primary caregiver, though I'm assisting with everything from getting her to appointments to matching them with information to providing care and visits as often as possible. I'd like to buy my dad an audiobook to listen to about dementia. Does anyone have a…
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Where do I Start?
I need to figure out where to start. I’ve got to have some extended “me” time. He drives me crazy with repeated questions, IPhone issues, wet pants, confusion, deliriums, pacing, rubbing his hands, running interference with his truck (I don’t let him drive) and scammers. My life is exhausting. I’m falling into the abyss…
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When I'm away, Dad doesn't feed Mom
My Mom has pretty advanced dementia, Dad less advanced, I live with them to take care of them. Mom would stay in bed and not eat if I didn't feed her; Dad can get himself some simple food like cereal and ice cream; I make or buy them both real food. I tried to hire in-home care for Mom a few months ago, but Dad chased away…
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Refusal to take meds
My mother, who lives in a memory care facility, has been increasingly resistant to taking her meds (she has six or seven meds she takes, divided between after breakfast and bedtime). What are some strategies for dealing with this? The nurses at her facility have some success in bargaining with her, but that seems to have…
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Dental problems
My DH who is in stage 6/7 has been having problems with his teeth for at least a year. He has several front teeth that have decay and lost a crown several months ago that the dentist was not able to replace because of decay underneath it. He said he would likely need about 7 teeth pulled. The dentist said he was unlikely…
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I've had ALZ for several years. I'm tired of the misinformation
I'm new to this organization and this forum. But I'm not new to Alzheimer's. I have been struggling for about 4 years now and looking back I was struggling before that with a variety of things. Speech is off, balance is off, sometimes I can't slow my brain down and sometimes I can't get it going, understanding people when…
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Fun Night
So I woke up at 12 midnight to hearing my DH walking around in his bedroom. I was having trouble getting to sleep so I decided to ignore it (maybe it will stop lol) - big mistake. Finally, I got up and went into his bedroom to find his bed totally full of all of his clothing, along with his jewelry box, shaving kit, shaver…
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Korsakoff Dementia
Is anyone in here caring for a spouse that has Korsakoff dementia? I have so many questions
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Physical therapy vs Occupational therapy ?
Good morning all. My DH had his first physical therapy spot yesterday. My DH wanted me there for the intro , I was, adding info when he wasn't able to recall time frames of events. When the physical exercise began he wasn't able to follow her verbal directions and kept apologizing. The therapist said it's okay, you've just…
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Trouble finding caregiving help
My husband has early-onset Alzheimer's that has progressed to moderate stage. He doesn't need help with personal care yet but he has difficulty communicating, can no longer drive and can't operate the coffeemaker, microwave, TV, etc. He's still cognitively very aware but finally agreed to let someone come in to help…
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The guilt…
There is so much guilt living with loved ones who have dementia. Am I doing the right thing? Do I need to visit more? Am I doing enough? I’m at a place right now where I feel like my Mom is living and yet not living. She’s in a wonderful AL but refuses to be involved. Visits are torture because it’s a fight to get her out…
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Snipe Hunt
back when, the s outs always had snipe hunts on camp outs. Seems I’m at it again. So far i have been hunting for 5 kids that were left at day camp and should be walking along the highway in the rain,(try explaining to the police wheyyouare doing 15mph in the breakdown lane) later it was two college girls (since we were in…
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Sundowning
My mum literally stays up all night pottering around. Has fixated with opening all her curtains and making her bed even though it’s night time she doesn’t even realise that its dark when she opens all the curtains. Her GP has put her on 4mg melatonin which she has been taking for 7 nights and they clearly don’t touch the…
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"Bed Cane" (support handle) to help with transfer from bed
Hi, it's been suggested I order a "bed cane"/support handle for my father (he has pretty advanced dementia and lives in assisted living. Those I see online look good, and I know there are medical supply companies with these as well. Has anyone used one of these, and is there a best, most secure brand (that doesn't slip out…
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Locks: what brand
I want to add a lock in our bathroom so I can put jewelry, wallet in a cabinet. I'm thinking this would be more protection against theft than keeping DH out…..he does not rummage through things, and doesn't see well enough to get into anything with a lock anyway. The problem is, the width of the door that overlaps the…
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Med Help Needed
Hello! My dear mom is unable to verbalize anything now. She has recently begun to be more combative and agitated with the staff at her nursing home. The Dr. felt she may be in some type of pain, so he prescribed traMADol HCl Oral Tablet 50 MG before bed. He said it is a good place to start. Mom is already on 75mg of…
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FTD - Idea to help with lack of impulse control with eating for your loved one
Hello all. My friend I've been giving care to I believe has FTD. He has a short term memory issue and a lack of control with eating, especially sweets. I found out that he likes my cooking and will eat nearly anything I cook. Instead of buying him his usual sweets he wants, I make it something that has some kind of health…
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Help with how to have the driving discussion . . .
I am new to the community so if someone can point me toward prior posts on the topic, that would be great. My DH is only 65 and moving toward the far end of moderate in his journey, of course he won't admit there are any issues. He has been really good about letting me do the driving (he has only driven a couple of times…
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Driving concerns
my DH was diagnosed with mild to moderate cognitive impairment. He has been taking Aricept for about a month. We recently went on vacation and his driving was erratic. He had to stop very quickly many times because he didn’t realize cars were stopped or braking. He also turned around to talk to the backseat people for way…
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Therapy maybe?
My DW has been in MC for 4-5 months now and I still can't get over the guilt I feel for not visiting on some days and for having to leave her looking sad and dejected when I do leave after a visit. She is always looking for me and when I visit she starts crying saying she's been looking everywhere for me and couldn't find…