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Touring memory care - Plan B
I visited two memory care places and it is difficult for me to think about placing my DH. Both places stressed that no one is ever ready to place their love one. Just don’t wait too long before he has declined to the point where he will not be accepted. Not sure what stage that would be. My.DH can still care for himself,…
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A long road ahead…
I just joined this discussion group. I had a difficult night with my mom. It started five years ago when I begged my mom to see a neurologist. After reading the report from the neurologist, and hearing what I had told him from my experiences with her, my mom hand wrote a three page letter firing the neurologist because “he…
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Primary Care partner having trouble getting sibling help
New to all of this, and just looking for some support. Mom (75f) been on cognitive decline for several years and recently diagnosed with dementia. I (43F) have recently moved back home to help care for both her and Dad (80M). It can be A LOT. I'm having a hard time controlling my frustration with a siblings who just can't…
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Xmas decorations everywhere...
Just need to vent - my DH was diagnosed recently with MCI although I believe that he is further along and we will be getting further evaluation. In the meantime, I am really struggling with his "organization" skills and insistence that he does not need help. DH has always taken great pride each year in setting up full size…
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Expectations of Employed Caregivers
My wife is stage 5-6 AD and at home. She is mobile, can communicate, although usually not correctly, still uses utensils to eat, is not incontinent, enjoys social time with others (not so much with me but that is not unexpected), exhibits confusion, anxiety and agitation. Medication has helped with the agitation and…
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Leqembi?
Hi I'm new to this group and looking for some advice. My mom is diagnosed AD last month. Her MMSE score is 14. Would Leqembi be effective for her? Does anyone have recommendation for resources we can talk to (researchers, medical experts, etc.)? Thanks in advance.
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Sad caregiver
I am sure blue. I work so hard to stay cheerful, keep my spouse occupied and happy. I can never meet his needs, I am always a step behind.
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Delusions or Dreams
I'm not sure if what my DH is having are delusions or something else. The episodes seem to occur after sleep or a nap. I think that he is having very vivid dreams and when he wakes up instead of realizing that he has had a dream he incorporates the dream into his waking stage. For instance the other morning he woke up…
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processing/ grief support, not lots of people to relate to
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Significant other
Hi, I need advice on how to approach this situation with my dad who has dementia. His girlfriend of 12 years that has been living with him, will now be moving out of state because she has health issues and will be cared for by her son that lives in another state. She’s been hospitalized the last 6 weeks and I have been my…
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Worst Week of My Life-Rant
This has been the worst week of my life. DH died Tuesday night. That was understandably difficult, but bearable. Wednesday, my car started making a loud noise when I apply the brakes. Thursday I cleaned out his room at the ALF. It was very emotionally difficult. Thursday night the motherboard in my furnace failed. Living…
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Mom refuses to take medication and has become very aggressive....
Hello! My mother is 69 yrs old. She was diagosed with Alzheimer's about 3 years ago. She was considered to be mild/moderate at the beginning of 2024 but I feel like there has been some progression. I am her primary and only caregiver. For about a month or so she has been refusing to take her medication. I've tried…
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Ftdcaregiver1
@FTDCaregiver1 I saw your comment (on a different discussion ) about losing your loved one this week. Just wanted to tell you I was sorry for your loss.
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Moving Dad to a New Facility
I have never posted here, but just need to get this out. I have done 99.9% of the caregiving for my dad who is now mid to late stage. He is in Assisted Living, but the facility he is in provides very little assistance. I think they may be understaffed but it's just not working out. This past weekend, I spent 5 hours with…
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Televising Without Sound
My DH will sit by the hour and watch television without the sound turned on. Has anyone else had this experience?
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Me, I am living with it!
Anybody that has ES and is talking about it, instead of me hearing what we are putting people through. Hearing it through a care givers lens is depressing. I am struggling with how to process it myself. Thanks Anybody ES age 53?
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Concerned,not sure where to go from here
My mother has dementia and I think it is in her last stage. I was wondering if I could find some information to see where we are at. I know that everyone is different in regards to what symptoms/behaviors they go through to determine what stage they are at, but just starting this week, actually, about 2 days now, she will…
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Bumbly words in communication
Dad is really at a point now where his words are intelligible choppy and i often cannot even tell what he is saying. I have to guess at everything and I can tell by how he looks at me, that I have gotten it wrong. How frustrating it must be for him. Does anyone have tips on how you coped with this in your lo...maybe you…
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Do the specific loops stop?
My mother (88), just a couple months into AL (who really should be in MC, and likely will be transitioned soon), has incessant looping (like many of our LOs do). There are several topics, but one is that she wants her 2 credit cards back, along with her driver’s license and $25 cash, all of which she supposedly gave me for…
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End stage - mom
Hi. My mom has been non verbal for the last year or so. She is end stage. Puréed food, bed/chair bound, help with everything. The past few visits she’s been trying to say something. It’s just weird. Anyone have this happen? I am not sure what to do, if anything. TIA
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Need Advice - Elder Abuse
Hi all, I need some help. My parent was diagnosed with alz last year, it is moderate to severe based on my perception. I don't know that the doctor ever told us what stage they were. They have a partner who is significantly younger (almost 30 years difference) than them who they've been with for maybe 2 years or more (both…
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I’m angry and resentful!
The past few weeks I have been angry! I’m angry at my husband for having a disease he didn’t ask for I’m angry at myself for losing it and being frustrated and thinking I have a handle on things and realizing I don’t! I’ve been very short tempered and sad. Both of which I’m not!Our marriage has been one where he was never…
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God’s promises
My SIL sent me this and I thought I’d share it. I especially liked the thoughts in the first paragraph. I hope the picture is readable.
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My journey so far
Here’s my story. About 2 years ago I began to notice changes in my husband’s memory and behavior. We were big outdoor enthusiasts, travelers and longtime birders and my husband loved photography. He began to complain about his binoculars and camera, they were not working he said and replaced them. I discovered he wasn’t…
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Fatal fall
My Dad, 89, with VD, has so many fractures due to several falls in the past 2 years. He fractured his spine, humerus, elbow, hip and pelvis. He's completely bed bound, double incontinent, needs to be fed, and he's kept comfortable with pain pills (narco, morphine). He is under hospice care in assisted living. He still has…
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Reaching my stress level point
Hi- I am a caregiver for my two parents living in one household. One has mild cognitive impairment and the other has low to moderate dementia. I have been caring for them for the past year. My issue is that my mother has become increasingly worse in the past couple of weeks. She can't seem to remember how to do any tasks…
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Ten Depends a Day?
My dad recently transitioned to memory care from assisted living. After he moved, we noticed he is using 9-10 Depends a day. A caregiver there noticed that he is wearing three pair at a time. I have gently asked about how he uses Depends. "What may be going on, to cause a burn rate of 10 a day?" His replies are defensive,…
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How to Know if Skilled Nursing Center/Nursing Home is Better than MC
Mom ended up in a skilled nursing center for rehab about 4 months ago.We didn't bring her back home because we felt it safer for her at the center. Each wing has a nurse, doctors and PA's, dentist, xrays, etc. are available there if necessary. Since she's been there she has become too weak to walk and is in a wheelchair…
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Scared to be alone
I don’t know what to say anymore when my mom says ‘I’m lonely. When are you coming back? Promise?’ I see her in MC almost every day. I know that she is scared bc she understands to some degree that she is losing her mind and afraid of what’s to come. Today she said to me ‘I’m really going to miss you. I’m running out of…
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PWD needs to go into AL, says she wants to, but won't cooperate.
I have DPOA, and I'm my PWD's only remaining kin. Once a very prim and proper woman, she now yells verbal abuse at me regularly and even curses sometimes - completely opposite her former behavior. We had toured a facility last year, and first she said she liked it, then later she said absolutely not. Recently, she's been…