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Memory Care update
After a bunch of problems at my mom’s MC (staff turnover, two ER trips in 3 months, her constant complaints about the place), I looked at two other places. One owned by the same company, overlapping staff, bigger, more beautiful, and a friend’s moms had moved there, but not as good of a location. I met with current MC…
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Sundowning and agitation
Can anyone help me with suggestions to help this. My husband hasn't slept through the night in 9ver 3 yrs. He is up/down, up/down all might ling. He goes in the bathroom at least 15x a night. He's now on Flowmaster which helps during the day but he claims he doesn't actually pee every tome he goes to the bathroom. It's…
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Flew home and found mom in self neglect
I am the youngest of 7, and my mother’s only girl. I’m the favorite and so I have the best relationship with her. My mom is 74, and I noticed something was wrong last year when she was showing some short term memory loss, not answering her phone, and making excuses to not fly to Colorado to visit her kids. Saying she was…
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I'm new here..
Hello everyone! I'm new to this website. I've been feeling very alone with my mothers diagnosis. We never really been to close even though I wanted to be. She also has bipolar. It's just been hard and it's difficult to fine people who understand. I feel very alone in this.
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I need help
Hi I’m really having trouble coping with my mother.She’s been forgetting a lot lately and repeating herself. I try to remind her of something’s she can’t remember but she gets upset at me. I talk to my children about it and she gets angry because she doesn’t want everyone to no her business. I tell her that those are my…
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Mom with Vascular Dementia
My late 70s mom has been diagnosed with VD. She is also a diabetic. Her short term memory is terrible, sitting and does not talk, sleeps a lot, personality change, cries, depressed, pain (real or real to her), unstable when gets up and falls often. Does VD progress like ALZ until total loss of memory? I find it strange…
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Moving home
So, I’m moving back home to help out. I’m an only child and my dad is having trouble taking care of my mom on his own. She fell at the beginning of this year and broke her foot and her shoulder. I ended up taking FMLA to help through her healing. I’m hoping that moving home will help me feel less exhausted. I went back to…
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Just need to vent
After more than six months two doctor recommendations and a letter of incompetence I have finally convinced my brother it time to move mom to AL. She lives with him and is home alone while he is at work. I have the DPOA but it’s hard to do things without my brother on board when he lives with her. My SIL was the DPOA for…
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Getting The POA Enacted
Hi, I just wanted to know if anyone has had the POA enacted and what that process looks like if you're already the POA. My grandmother is getting worse, but she might not want to go to a care facility at the end of this year. I let her doctor know I'm the POA and I'd like to get it enacted in case we have to put her in a…
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Suggestions are appreciated
My Dad has Alzheimer’s and my mom has just been diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer.she has been feeling ok until last week and is in hospital now. My Dad always wants to be with my Mom(agreat love story), but he is quite advanced. I have brought him to see her the past two days but yesterday was such a bad day for him,and I’m…
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Transitions into Memory Care..
Transitions are hard. Change is hard. Especially when there are enough thoughtful moments interwoven in the confusion….
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I’m 19 and don’t know what to do
My dad is 68 and was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s about a month ago. this was not a surprise, I started encouraging my mom to talk to him over a year ago but it still feels real all of a sudden. I see him a couple times a week and each time he’s losing more of himself and I just don’t know what to do to support him and my…
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New drained and confused.
My mom is 84 and moderate stage.i am an only child and she move into our home nearly a year ago. I have severe anxiety over her diagnosis. Some days you can't even see symptoms and other days whew! Obvious noticeable. So some days I think diagnosis is wrong and other days I know. It's a heck of a Rollercoaster. It's so…
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Time for outside help but what kind?
My mom has dementia & is 95. She was diagnosed 3 years ago & moved in with me & my sister. I am not new to caregiving, my husband was chronically ill for 10 years & the last 2 in a hospital bed in our living room. We have always thought ourselves blessed that we both are able to work from home & care for her. My sister…
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I’m at an impasse
I am extremely frustrated! My dad refuses to comply with the doctor’s referral to see a neurologist. He’s taking memantine, which is for dementia and is in denial. My brother and sister have their own families and issues. I’m the one that’s closest geographically to my parents, so it all has fallen on my lap. However,…
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Suspected Alzheimer’s/dementia
My mom is 57. She is forgetting the answers to questions five minutes after they’re answered and forgetting what store we bought something at when we were there the day before. She didn’t remember making a decision about travel plans until I reminded her of the decision and told her why. She feels like it’s nothing. I’m…
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Not Sure How To Cope Or What To Say
Hi everyone! I'm looking for some advice from the collective brain out there. My mom's dementia had been fairly slow to progress over the last several years….until she turned 90 a few weeks ago! For some reason, it seems like it triggered something, though I'm sure it's just a coincidence. She's suddenly having moments…
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Help with "story" to get Mom to MC this Thursday
Taking Mom to MC this Thursday. She does not know about it. I see no positive to telling her about it beforehand. She is certain she is fully capable, but she is not. It is well past time for her to have 24 hour care. All of us are still working so cannot provide the 24/7 care she needs. My problem is how I'm going to get…
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Won't answer the phone
Hi Everyone - My mom is in assisted living, my Dad moved into AL in February of 2023 and then my Mom followed him in April of 2023. It wasn't safe for her alone. My Dad is in advance stages of Alzheimer's and hospice has been on the case for close to a year now. He's doing well in AL. My mom suffered a TIA last month and…
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In Home Respite Care
I am the sole caregiver of my soon to be 98 year old mother, who was diagnosed with dementia 14 years ago. As I'm sure most of you are/have been in the same situation, I've been unable to attend major family events (births, graduations, funerals, parties, etc.). Over the years I have contacted many…
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So Many Emotions
It's finally happening. I'm leaving my mom tomorrow after brunch. I'm driving 1000 miles back to my home. I'll have been gone a measly 6 weeks but it seems like a year. I can't wait to get back to my life. I'm terrified, so so sad, and feeling very remorseful. I'm also looking forward to a break from the responsibilities.…
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I believe my mother may have Alzheimer’s.
My dad is 82 and in good health. My mom is 77 and my dad and I believe she has Alzheimer’s. She will not leave the house and refuses to see a doctor. She sleeps throughout the day and gets up around 7-8pm. She argues with my dad and blames him for everything she’s feeling. This goes on almost every night until 4-5 am. She…
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The move to Memory Care....'Hotel California'
The move had to be made. That doesn't make it any easier.
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Seeing the end but not
I’m such a mixed bag of emotions. My father is the most resilient man I know, and I mean very resilient. Every time the docs have said he won’t overcome, he does, whether it’s walking post stroke, body self healing brain bleeds, malignant stomach tumor that was supposed to be the end within a matter of months but never…
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Coping with a father with dementia in my 20s
At the behest of my therapist, I am looking for the support of others going through similar circumstances as I am. I feel incredibly alone in my slow grieving process for my father, who is 68, and has been dealing with EO dementia for the last two years. I feel completely out of my depth as a 28 year old person without the…
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When is it time…
Hi all! my mom was diagnosed with late stage Alzheimer’s 2/23. Was a shock and so I moved my two kids in to her home and didn’t realize the extent of it until then. Well here we are a little over a year later and her progression has become severe. I quit working 8 months ago to take care of her 100%. Up until recently she…
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Whether to quit my job.
I am right now on fmla to be taking care of my dad. My question is the I’m 60 and the cost of paying someone will cost more that my salary per week. Don’t know whether to quit after fmla is over and just take care of dad myself. I have moved in with him last July.
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Suprapubic catheter
I'm thinking to have my dad try a suprapubic catheter as opposed to a Foley catheter. I will talk to his urologist next month about it. My dad is unhappy changing his catheter every month. However, I read that he still needs to change the suprapubic catheter every 4 to 6 weeks. But is it also painful? What if he gets an…
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cross-post: looking to trade visits with someone in Nashville who's parent is in San Fran Bay
hi there this is my first post and I’m so grateful to be here and for this community. My dad has recently been diagnosed with mild cognitive decline though once he quit drinking, I’m hoping he gets that diagnosis revisited. I’m exploring alternatives to the horrific options that I see in terms of forcing him into memory…
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Mother is undiagnosed and won’t go to doctor or allow anyone in to help
my 84 yr old mother has been deteriorating years and she lives with my 92 yo father who cant remember anything but does still drive and do groceries My mother is sleeping almost all day and in a nightgown with more holes than cloth until 7pm every day and is a hoarder. Lately there has been food out all over the counters…