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Moving my dad into MC
We are moving my 94 year old father into MC. I don't know how to tell him this. He won't remember the conversation 10 minutes later and will get extremely agitated in the moment. The thought of taking him there and leaving him is tearing me apart. I hate thinking of him being there all confused, not knowing where he is or…
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Daughters caregiver rights Hawaii ,Pay has been cut off .
I am the youngest daughter careing for my 83 yr old mom with middle stage dementia ( not formally diagnosed).She has been living in my cottage for 1 year now with her 15 year old dog ,the love of her life.After a Small bowel obstuction surgery and 10 days in the hospital ,my mom had quite a big decline in her memory and…
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Getting parents in CCRC
My mom has advanced alzheimers with mixed dementia. My quadruple bypass diabetic type 2 father is her primary caregiver and he refuses to plan long term for him or hers. My mom needs 24 hour care and he refuses to do anything about it other than a having one woman from care.com come in a few hours a week to cook for him.…
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Feeling guilt and questioning my decision
I’m feeling immense guilt about how to take care of my 77 yo mom. She lives alone in an apartment and I live about 30 min away. I am a 39 yo stay at home mom to 3 young children (ages 3, 9, 11). My mom just got diagnosed with Alzheimer’s after 3 years of my sister and I noticing serious memory changes. She is intelligent…
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How to get your parent to a SNF when they refuse to go
I'm new here & so thankful I found this forum! I have been caring for my 88yr old mom for over 2 years now. Diagnosed with Alzheimer's in July 2023. Steady decline since then, and last night was the realization that now is the time for SNF. She had a terrible outburst of anger, agitation and aggression and I feel that it…
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Siblings relationships
My husband and I have two parents with Alzheimers/dementia. Brain changes. How do other handle the following, my mom calls my oldest brother repeatedly from the home where she lives with his son and daughter and begs for him to take to his home. His is 73 with COPD. He is going to stop answering her calls, and I encouraged…
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Thankful we're not alone! (Just found this group/YOU!)
My dad (88) is at home with my mom (87). He has Alz. & needs 24 hr care now, because he'll just stand up & be on his way somewhere & doesn't have good balance & would fall over if we weren't there to catch him. 24hr care is not sustainable financially. My husband & & live 30 min. away & are covering some of the 12 hr…
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Vascular dementia
End of the road, stage 7 or still stage 6, really doesn't matter anymore. I visit my mother several times a year. We live in different states. I have watched her decline over the last 4 years with vascular dementia. I have been here for her surgeries, doctor appointments, to move her to different rooms, from assisted…
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Guardianship
I am the middle child, and the only girl. My mom has appointed me POA for both health and financial. Of course there has to one sibling that will not play by the rules, my oldest brother. He has recently purchased a vehicle in my mothers name. She didn't know what the heck was going on when I asked her about it and neither…
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Having "the talk" with your parent
Hi, I'm new here and was hoping to get some guidance on how to officially tell my mom that she is having memory/cognitive issues. She hasn't received an official diagnosis from a medical professional, but her primary care doctor and that doctor's nurse both know that she is having issues. She also just has some cognitive…
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Medical terminology
Can someone please help me understand this in laymen’s terms.
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I love my mom, but my dad is my hero
I'm at a loss at this point of the "right" decision. My mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's 5 years ago. I moved a few states away last year when my father began calling and asking if it was possible for me to come back. I have 3 worthless brothers that live an hour or less away. I finally came home in January after…
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Quick question on Medicaid income limits
I spoke to an Elder Care Attorney who was emphatic about setting up an Irrevocable Trust for Mom's house so that, after the 5-year look-back window, it will not need to be "spent down" to apply for Medicare. That seems reasonable. But I'm confused about Mom's eligibility based on income. In Mom's state, it appears that…
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reposting for McKinneyVA
Your post landed in an administrative thread, I am reposting it so you will get more visibility. To make a new post click on the orange button with a white cross at the bottom of the screen, and then click on the new discussion button that will appear above it. Wait 2 or 3 seconds Welcome to the forum🙂. McKinney said- I am…
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Reposting for Oldestdaughter2023
Welcome to the forum. Your post landed in an administrative post that admin forgot to close. I am reposting it for you. To make a new post click on the orange button with a white cross a bottom of screen and then click again on the box it will show above the button. New to this site and dealing with my mom’s symptoms…
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Financial Assistant for Moms Caregiver
Good morning. I have been caregiving for my mom with Early Onset Alzheimers for the past year. Unfortunately, her care needs are far greater than I feel comfortable caring for and honestly I am just burnt out. My family is looking for some kind of care for her, whether it’s a daycare facility, nurse at home, etc. My mom…
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Caregiving advice
Hello , My husband and I are at the beginning stages of caregiving for my mother in law . She lives with her husband . We work full time . My husband gives her meds in the morning and night . We took her keys . She has stopped washing her hair and does not change her clothes as much as before . She needs help washing hair…
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Appropriate cost for Home Health Aide
The quote I received for a home care assistant seems quite high compared to what research led me to expect, but I understand internet research may be misleading. I was quoted $650 per week, for three days per week, six hours per day. State is New Jersey. Does this roughly agree with others experience?
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Stubbornness has double down!
My 75 year old father has vascular dementia. He lives on a farm with my elderly mother and has taken care of things around the house his whole life. His stubbornness has gotten worse as his dementia has progressed. He refuses to give up the keys to his tractor or to stop using chainsaws and other dangerous tools. I've…
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Handling mom's delusions
My 85 year old mom has moderate dementia. For the past year she has had this delusion that her husband of 60 plus years is not her husband, her husband (with the same unusual name) is missing and she regularly asks us to try to find him and at times cries about him not being there. Obviously this bothers my dad even though…
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Is it Dementia or her life-long scheming?
My mother is 95 and has dementia. Fortunately, she lived in an Assisted Living Group home, but not one that specializes in Memory Care. I am currently working with my mother’s physician to get medication (Seroquel) dialed in. Her dementia is not the main cause of my aggravation. She has several negative personality traits…
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Need help understanding
Hello I'm new to this. I'm actually heading to Germany next week to help with my mom who has been diagnosed with dementia. This is something new to me and with the language barrier over there ( with doctors) lm a bit concerned. Was hoping maybe I could get some input as to what questions should I be asking. I video chatted…
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How do you know when it's time to move parent into Assisted Living?
My mother lives in another state with her partner of over 30 years and has early to mid-stage dementia. Her partner has expressed that he can't take caring for anymore (and is often angry with her and also has severe anxiety and depression) but when I suggest that I can move her down to assisted living in FL to be near me…
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memory care or skilled nursing
My mom is 93 and has advanced Alzheimers. She has gone downhill steadily since my dad died 5 years ago, from walking 5 miles a day as precinct captain to not being able to get out of bed for the past week without a lot of encouragement and help from me. I have been taking care of her at her home for much of the past two…
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Frustrated
I live 3 hours away so I visit my mom once a month. My sister and aunt insisted my mom live by/with them. However, they still have an expectation that my mom can care for herself. My mom does function in some ways at a fairly good level but doesn’t shower, put on clean clothes, or consistently take her meds. I used to be a…
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Long tiring disease
My Dad has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s since January 2021. He is on memantine and seroquel. My mom is his primary caregiver. I come to my parents house every day to help because he can be exhausting. The pacing, the accusations of cheating or stealing money. He also doesn’t want my mom to go anywhere, he almost…
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I feel like I'm the only one who feels this way...
I feel like my mom is already gone. She still knows me and she can have a conversation, but her short term memory is gone. In a 5 minute time period she will say the same thing or ask the same question 5 or more times. She insists I never call but I call every day. When I visit, I will talk to her the next day and she will…
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Education for Health Care Workers
Hi. My Dad has ALZ dementia, my mom had dementia associated with Parkinson's before her death in 2020. My husband and I are still working full time as do our adult children. Two years ago I had to have my dad placed in assisted living. Recently he had a fall and fractured his arm. I accompanied him to the ER. We have never…
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Vanderbilt University Medical Center research survey available through 6/1/2023
Vanderbilt University Medical Center is conducting research on how to leverage collective knowledge and interactions in online platforms, such as Reddit, ALZConnected, and Facebook to assist informal caregivers for people living with Alzheimer’s disease or other dementias (ADRD). Informal ADRD caregivers refer to those…
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Symptoms of alz
So I messaged my mom’s neurologist yesterday regarding the following issues. Which what I have read are common symptoms of alz. I haven’t been thrilled with her dr since first meeting her but took 4 months to see her. Anyways, thoughts of my moms symptoms and the drs response…. I wrote this to neurologist: Hi! Over the…