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How to know when it's time for MC
My husband and I have been caring for my dad since Sept 2020, and lately he doesn't do anything but sit and stare into space. He thinks he's watching TV when it isn't on. I've tried a lot of things but they only engage him for a few minutes. Even with our respite caregivers all he wants to do is sit and watch TV but he…
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Managed debit card?
Curious to know if anyone has found a debit card option that allows for limits managed by someone (me). For instance, Chase First Banking is a debit card for kids, but it's limited to ages 6-17. Does such a thing exist for an elder parent that could be managed by the child—setting limits on where and how much the…
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This is MY home
My mother was diagnosed with ALZ in 2018. She came to live with me in IN at the end of last year. Prior to that, she had lived with my sister in NJ for 15+ years. She owned her own home briefly before that and we lived with her parents when I was young. She is often mumbling/whispering but I cannot tell what she is saying.…
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Took my mom but the new digs
Caring for my wife with advanced Alzheimer's and my mom with moderate dementia. Took my mom by the very nice MC and she hates me. Stopped to get something to drink but she won't sit with us. She is trying to escape.
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Newbie
I'm one of the new kids here. My mom has had memory issues it seems like forever. She "retired" at 49 due to MS. She is now 76. My stepfather (85) has Parkinson's. Mom was given a neuro-memory test last year. Dr said without a new scan she can't give her memory loss 100% name, but 97% sure Alzheimer's it's name. I'm…
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Mom won’t come home from friends
My mother is in middle stage Alzheimer’s. Her friend wanted her to come over for a sleepover with another two friends that they went to college with. Before leaving, my mother was being difficult and angry because I wouldn’t let her do certain things because of safety reasons. I thought it would do her good to be around…
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Recommendations for AL facilities in either NY or FL?
Has anyone move a family member into an AL in the Citrus County area of FL or Orange County area of NY? Both would work for my parents who are just about ready to give up living in their own independent apartment. Hoping someone on this forum can recommend a place they have dealt with personally as online reviews are a…
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Helping Dad
So I’m just getting home from driving 45 minutes each way to diffuse an argument between my parents. Mom has dementia and dad is doing his best, but loses patience and gets upset with her when she gets confused. This leads to fighting, but then she can’t convey why they’re arguing she just knows she’s upset. I’m unable to…
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Major holidays: LO thinks she's hosting and parents will be there
My mom (LO. Moderate ALZ) thinks she's hosting most major holidays, like she used to before the dementia. We tell her that we're all going to [another relatives] house, but she doesn't believe us and wants to stay home because "people are coming over." Do we just tell her that everyone will be going to [another relatives]…
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End stage AD
There are so many websites out there that list AD stages and symptoms but I want to ask people who are actually living through it what stage they think my mom could be in. She cannot form sentences that make sense, cannot understand much of what is said to her, doesn’t know anyone in the family, has almost no childhood…
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Bible Verse to Uplift You 5/14/23
Dear Friends, Again, I thank you for your encouraging messages. If you need a prayer, please also include those as well. Peace Always, Ronnie (Veronica Kelly Badowski) * BE LIKE JESUS * Philippians 2:1-5 New Living Translation Have the Attitude of Christ 2 Is there any encouragement from belonging to Christ? Any comfort…
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Managing care long-distance
I could use some advice. My mom, who is 81 years old, is in stage 4, borderline stage 5. She still lives at home in MA with my dad, also 81. I live in VA and manage all of their finances, medical, house related items, etc. I fly home every 4-6 weeks for doctor appointments, house cleaning, hair cuts, laundry, etc. since my…
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Manic
So even with mood stabilizing meds, mania still occurs?? Does anyone else experience this? Is it just random when the manic episodes occur or is this going to be a constant? I thought getting her on meds would help and we were good for a little over a week and now she’s Manic again. I’m kind of at my wits end on what to…
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Accountant or bookkeeper recommendations
Hi there, Anyone know a good accountant or bookkeeper that understands trusts and Medicaid? I'm the POA for my mom, who has Alz. As part of an awful experience called Medicaid planning, a lawyer is recommending my mom put some assets into a living trust; plus open a Qualified Income Trust; plus open a Medicaid Compliant…
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My sister stopped moms med without consulting me
My mother has been on Seroquel (12.5mg) given late afternoon since March and also an antidepressant Mirtazapine (7.5mg). They say she is late stage 6 dementia. She is sleeping all night now and her speech and general mood is much better. Well, I and my older sister are joint POAs but I have the medical POA. Last Thursday…
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My 61 year old dad has been diagnosed with early onset dementia and I'm only 19
Growing up, I was such a daddy's girl; I absolutely adored my dad and looked up to him so much. He introduced me to my love of sports and I got most of my humor and definitely my competitiveness from him. I had such an amazing relationship and I always think of him as my hero. About 5 years ago, I started to notice a…
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Help with explaining new SNF home to my mom!
Good morning everyone! This group is such an awesome group! I very much appreciate everyone’s questions, answers, and great suggestions! I had posted a question several weeks ago regarding moving my mom into a SNF. As it turns out, she had a fall, which required her to be hospitalized for 4 days. That was my opening to…
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Care Giver Referral
Can anyone recommend a service in Ft Worth for in home dementia care? I am at the point I need some daily help during the day with my 80 yr old mother with advanced dementia.
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Parent with dementia participating in memorial
My father has dementia. My mother passed away in January, and we are now planning her memorial for June. I have not involved my father in the planning because I think the complexity would be too much for him, but he has told me that he would like to speak. I'm not at all worried about what he would say - he speaks very…
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Mum with Alzheimer, dad fine cognitively moved in for help in Jan
Mum is declining pretty fast yet the problem is my dad who won’t accept it and is pushing her to be her old self, he thinks he can stop this. They are 90 and 89 respectfully. She is at the stage of not being able to dress herself or shower herself yet he insists they go out and live a normal life. Dad says she is just…
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Thought-provoking piece from the NYT
https://www.nytimes.com/2023/05/09/magazine/dementia-mother.html?unlocked_article_code=Q8fLrVVmv6CG-xoMZaz-Mduz0b8RD-NaL4vEZjiCxjxaOrDiRbaxL_aAkaOUFBDuZXz-DtdQVAEEYoC9-8J31i2kf2woOlwUTlc1oq0bSUFWZAgHQ0CTpujfcbg-3GZowzAwH1yAsM8g0-0rWLRP8UwX-COvYkb12uVnxN2phRXHeVjThbMmVaVGKHuCg52WxZgkDbknpEZVtlUiAplM079d0o-vOxNfc8CY2L3-8q8leA…
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Mom doesn’t trust anyone
My dad has advanced dementia and can’t be left alone so I stay with him several days a week for my mom to get out to dr apts and grocery shopping etc. In the past year my mom has shown signs of dementia as well. She forgets things that happened and is paranoid to the degree that she’s accusing her daughter in law and…
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Moving Mom to memory care
Hi there. I'm new on this message board and would love to hear any ideas on 'fiblets' to get my mom into memory care. She is a very proud woman who is completely opposed to moving. She has refused to let helpers in her house. She currently lives alone. She was rated as stage 5 entering stage 6 dementia by the speech…
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Tooth problem
My mom has stopped brushing her teeth and the caregivers aren't doing it either. She now has a bad tooth that can either be pulled OR take off the bridge that is is under, pull it and have a new bridge (covered by insurance). The latter would take two hours. I don't know if she would sit and cooperate that long. You can't…
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How do I navigate supporting my mom?
My mom has had dementia since 2022, and probably before then too. She used to live by herself until a week ago where I found a low income senior apartment for her. We’re still waiting on approval for the apartment, so in the meantime she’s staying with me, my partner, and my partners brother and his girlfriend. The last…
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Mom can’t live alone but won’t accept caregiver
Hi- my mom had been living at home with my dad and her dementia was moderate, he passed in February and she can’t live alone but won’t accept a caregiver. She won’t move in with my sister or myself, insists she can live alone and when we try to get caregiver she won’t go in her house. She is beyond reasoning with, and she…
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Anger and Dementia
This is my first time posting to this forum. I'm concerned about my 89 year old father's increased agitation, irritation, frustration, and absolute anger. How can I distinguish between what is "normal" for his age and what might be the beginning of some type of dementia. He's always been irritable and easily agitated. But…
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Mom early/quickly progressing dementia
Hello everyone. I hope I can concisely explain what’s going on and get some practical advice. My mom does not have a diagnosis. My mom and dad are 89 and 86, respectively, and I have spent the last 3.5 years trying to get them moved to a small house already on my property 3 hours from where they have been living. The move…
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So stressed
Hi everyone, I’m brand new here. I joined today because I feel like I’m approaching a crossroads and I need guidance. My father is 85 and last year, after a neuropsych evaluation, we were told he has Alzheimer’s. He was told at that time that he needed to get his affairs in order and seek AL. He has allowed me to take over…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 5/8/23
Dear Friends, I so appreciate your comments. Thank you for each one. Hugs, Veronica (Ronnie) Badowski Isaiah 30:21 “Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it.’” * VICTORY THOUGHT: God communicates with me; He directs my life. * POWER PRAYER:…