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New member
Hello. I am new here. My father has dementia and terrible sundowners. He just recently went into a nursing home and this is very hard on me. I visit frequently and leaving him is the hardest. Most visits are good but today he was extremely sad when I was leaving so I cried the entire drive home. I wish I could help him but…
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Denial
I left my job 8 months ago to get my mom out of a memorycare facility because she hated it. Now she thinks that she can live on her own again. She doesn't understand that living with me or memory care are her only options. There are occasional times that we can talk and she understands but they are very few. I don't know…
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How to figure out the stage of Alz my mom is in....
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Trying to get your parent in for testing when they resist
So
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To all newcomers
I send you ALL my sincerest condolences and want you to know that you are not alone in this; for if you are visiting this site it means that you are caring for a parent who has been diagnosed with or who is experiencing symptoms of Alzheimer's. You are not alone in this challenge, for I am here to help in any way that I…
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My mama passed
On June 29, 2023 my mama passed away at 8:22 pm. I had been her full-time caregiver for almost 7 years. During that time I was also a college student. I saw my mama everyday during her illness. I didn’t want her to go on the journey alone. She was on in-home hospice for almost 2 years. The hospice my mama was with I feel…
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It’s a roller coaster ride
My mom is living with me and on in home hospice care. She is in late stage dementia, incontinent and almost completely unable to talk. Most of the time she cannot walk, so we use a transfer chair. She cannot figure out how to use the toilet either (most of the time ). But last night she got out of bed very quietly so I…
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Delusions
We had just finished dinner and were starting to watch our weekly Sunday night comedy movie, when Dad suddenly said he'd been a pervert and touched little girls and his daughters. He didn't do this, but it made him so agitated when we said he didn't, and it also made my husband pretty upset - to where he had to step out of…
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Paranoia, Self-isolation, split personalities
It's only been 6 months that my mom has lived with us. Things were going well for the first 5 months, then BANG! Super steep decline. She had some paranoia before, now it's constant. She used to have great conversations with the lady in the mirror, but she became very aggitated and thought someone was trapped behind the…
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Coping with a parent who has false beliefs, confusion and delusion
My mother now 75 years old, has had occasional delusional moments since 1985 but was only officially diagnosed with a mild to medium form of dementia in 2013. Between 1985 and 2013, due to living in a 3rd world country in Africa and not having the resources available, it was not known that delusion was a symptom of…
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Has anyone used the medic alert gps system?
I am wondering if anyone has used the tracking system promoted by the Alzheimer’s Association. Medic Alert. I’d love to hear your thoughts.
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Moving mom out of her house
My mom has mid-stage dementia, and her memory and communication skills are getting a lot worse lately. She lives alone and has caregivers come in a few times a week. We feel it is time to move her to assisted living, but she is adamant about staying in her house. Whenever we even mention moving, she gets extremely angry. I…
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Tips for Bathing
My mother has dementia and has recently started to refuse bathing and washing her hair. I live on the other side of the country, but I am in contact via FaceTime at least twice a day and travel home as often as possible. She is living with my father who is her primary caregiver, but they also have a homecare.worker who…
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Help with managing moms anger
It appears her sundowners is now starting earlier in the day around 2pm by 5 pm she wants to pack up clothes and leave somewhere, my attempts to help her and calm her are met with more anger especially when I don’t let her go out of the home. She manage to get out once and we involved to police to help locate her. I now…
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Calming meds for mom since recent transfer to Board & Care y care
We just transferred my mom from a really good, 80 person memory care to a 6 resident Board & Care for both for financial reasons (it was very expensive) and because we thought she'd get better one on one. She's 95 and has moderate vascular dementia, no short term memory, recognizes her loved ones, can hold an ok…
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Ideas for hygiene
My mom doesn’t bathe or wash up .she tells me she does but no towels or underwear are used or changed . She gets angry when I tell her she hadn’t . Please help with ideas
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Crisis advice requested: dad being removed from MC facility due to violent behaviors
My dad is being removed from the memory care facility a 2nd time via Emergency Services (they decided to keep him once in between when he fell asleep after an outburst) due to violent behaviors. The MC facility has said they cannot take him back. What should I be thinking of? So far I have called and left a message for the…
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Every little slip downward
Today I went to visit my dad. When I got there he asked me where he was. He didn't recognize his own apartment. He has lived there for 50 years. This was a new one and I smacked me in the head like a brick. Usually there is a slow decline, but this was huge to me. He also did not remember my name and called my by one of…
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Stuck in the Middle
Hello, My mom is 89 and has stage 5 dementia. She moved in with my husband and me two years ago when we relocated from western NY to Raleigh NC for his job. She has a whole floor to herself with a big bedroom, huge living area, and full bathroom. No kitchen, but having a stove and using knives on her own is scary. We built…
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Help
My dad, had had dementia for awhile and I really find it hard because mom and dad do not do anything around the house My mom says we can't afford any help and I work full time. I have depression and it gets to me
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Mom refusing help
My 84 year-old mother is being cared for by my 86 year-old dad. They live 5 hours away from me. Mom’s memory is getting worse and worse and she refuses to seek medical help. She becomes suspicious and paranoid when the subject of medical assistance is brought up. My dad and I are seeking advice on how to help my mom when…
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Boredom?
My 87yo Dad is in stage 5/stage 6 Alz/VD, living in a nice CCRC AL apartment. He has started calling me in the mornings asking me what he is supposed to do. I think this is a mixture of several factors all getting mixed together: He is bored. This in turn is a consequence of many factors, including a lack of mobility (he…
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Daily Schedule Editable Templates
I am looking for an editable template I can use to create my dad's daily task lists so he can check them off each day without asking someone what to do next. He has a lot of help, yet we are trying to support his independence as much as possible. Ideally, the task list would come with realistic adult pictures--most of the…
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How to Cope with Mom’s Dementia
My dad passed away in 2015, my mom has known this. Just yesterday she called me to tell me he had just left the Assisted living facility where she stays, She asked me to hurry and try to find him. I got 2 calls from her about this, first time ever! I was in shock and scared! What do I say and do!!!
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Next steps for outdoorsy/active and healthy stage 4/5 Alzheimers
Hello there, I've been lurking on this forum for a little while as I determine if and how I engage in this community. What incredible outpouring of support and advice I've witnessed as I seek the silver bullet I don't think I'll find. I live slightly remotely from my parents. My dad is 79, an introvert and slightly…
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Parents in separate facilities
My parents have had a volatile relationship for over 60 years. My father has always been selfish and verbally abusive. My mother couldn’t ever bring herself to walk away, despite other family members urging her to do so. Now here we are, mom is 88 and frail with congestive heart failure and dad has been diagnosed with FTD…
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Genetic Link
Hi there! My dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in his mid 60s. Both of his parents both had dementia and Alzheimer’s. I’m in my 20s and very worried that there is a genetic link. Has anyone else dealt with this? Thank you!
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Just because your family has a history of dementia/Alzheimer's....
Hello all. Let me preface my comments by stating that I am not a healthcare professional; however, I am a researcher and a life-long learner. My father, his mother (my grandmother), and his grandfather (my great grandfather) ALL had Alzheimer's. When my father was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in 2015 (we suspect my father…
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Re:using a Geriatric Dr for Alzheimer's patient
Hi, my mom won't go to dr it's been around 7 months since she has and I can't just sit back and watch her get sicker she has lost alot of weight and barely takes her meds when she asks me to make a dr appointment when it's time to go she backs out of going so I was advised by my primary dr nurse there is a geriatric dr who…
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Communicating through art and color
My mom has dementia and as you know it's a struggle to manage emotions around it. Last year she moved into a nursing home, which was hard at first, but it's actually been the best thing for her and me. Since she's living there, I've found new ways to communicate with her as she can't have a conversation like she used to.…