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personal hygiene with toileting
My LO (83 yrs.) with moderate ALZ has been having increasing problems with managing her personal hygiene with her bowel movements. She has been wearing depends reliably, which has helped at least some. She's sloppy when she removes them (irritated I think), and makes a mess in the bathroom. I will find, and clean, fecal…
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Is it ever ok to just be blunt?
My mother called me today - I “put her in AL November 11th ,” due to hallucination/paranoia about people on TV being able to see/hear her. She woke me today from a sound sleep and told me she was going home tomorrow. I tried to de-escalate by trying to get her to tell me what had upset her. She did not want to tell.me, and…
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Diapers for men
My DH just started having incontinence issues. He’s always worn old style boxers. I’m concerned he won’t like the tightness of men’s diapers. Any ideas?
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Bathroom Number 2 question
Mom told me something weird today about her bathroom stool habits. She said that she can no longer push her stool out sitting on the toilet. Instead she makes sure she has a diaper on and then stands up ( usually in the bedroom) and does her thing. She already has issues physically making it to the bathroom in time…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 1/18/23
GOD ANSWERS US Isaiah 65:24 New International Version "Before they call I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear." We can be sure the Lord knows what we need before we ask. He is faithful and cares for us. He is all powerful, and He loves us. Seek His guidance, and He will be there to help us.
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When to let sleep, confused keeping schedule.
I've been wondering about this for some time and have tried to look it up but I'm getting conflicting answers and even more confused. Is there any hard or fast rules on how much sleep a PWD should get or if we should force them awake to keep on a schedule? I see others share that their LOs sleep more as the disease…
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Senior Babysitting
I've tried to find a sitter for my mom I think twice, and I only found people who would do full time or part time. None for like 4 hours. Anyone here of such a business? Or do I have to place an ad on Craigslist or something. That was a joke...I think.
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The Numbers Are Coming In On Seroquel
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Auto Insurance
My dad is in the early-to-mid stages of Alz, lives alone and owns a car. My sister has taken away his keys at the recommendation of his doctors, but his car insurance with USAA expires next month. Even though my sister has POA, the insurance agent said that my dad would have to be the one to cancel his own policy (or…
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Dealing with Frustration as only Caretaker
My DH was diagnosed officially June 2020 with Alzheimer's but had signs from a CT back in 2017 and has been taking meds for it ever since. He is in the middle stage and I'm full- time caregiver. Has trouble getting out of bed and trouble getting up from couch and now is confused how to sit down. As a result, I've injured…
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Paranoia and Blame to Caregiver- VENT
I do not have a family support group besides my husband to help me express my frustrations about taking care of my father with Alzheimer's. My father lived with us for about a year and it was the worst time of my life. I moved him into a retirement community right down the street from me and that was a huge weight lifted…
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Thanks to all who have written to me
I wrote on this message board for the first time a couple of weeks ago. I am not sure what I hoped for (it was recommended to me by my therapist). Over the past week, I have received nine wonderful postings from those of you out there who are struggling alone with the care of a loved one. It is so good not to be ALL ALONE…
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Not sure if I had shared this before.
https://acl.gov/CaregiverStrategy https://acl.gov/sites/default/files/RAISE_SGRG/NatlStrategyFamCaregivers_ActionsSCO.pdf https://nashp.org/raise-act-state-policy-roadmap-for-family-caregivers/
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Teeth Grinding(1)
My mother was diagnosed 3 1/2 years ago and I am looking forward to utilizing this discussion board for support. However, today I am posting for a friend who is caring for his wife who was diagnosed with early onset about six years ago and is currently in Hospice care at home. Recently his wife's teeth grinding has become…
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Preparing for the move to SNF
Well, I found a SNF for my mother. They called me Friday to tell me she has been accepted. I've been looking since October. Mom was approved for Medicaid LTC last fall, and has had Dementia for many years. It has progressed to the point that I can no longer handle being the sole caregiver. I am completely burnt out. I have…
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Are caregivers living in a ghost town?
It may take a village to raise a child, but you may discover a ghost town when it comes to the dying. ~Joy Johnston Why dying at home is not all it’s cracked up to be | The Caregiver Space I have a sister who has advanced cancer and most likely only has several months left. My mother is showing signs of moving towards…
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Small scale active games?
DW is at the stage where she needs detailed advice on how to shower, needs much help dressing, etc. I've taken over cooking, cleaning and all that. She's physically sound and in good shape, but mostly has little to occupy her. We've recently walked up to 7 miles in a day, and in warm weather she still rides the back of our…
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Warriorism of Caregiving
Attached are poems to help those who need them...
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HAD to share this email with you
Careblazers <natali@careblazers.com> To:Ed Sat, Jan 14 at 4:16 PM Careblazer, In the past, I've hosted several free, live dementia care classes. And those were great...for the ones who were able to attend live. As a dementia caregiver, you don't always have the ability to adjust your busy schedule to fit a training. That's…
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M1 your opinion please
I got a call from the pulmonologist yesterday regarding my mom’s CT scan. Her NSIP scarring is a little worse. Believed to be from some allergen or other exposure earlier in life as opposed to smoking( which she did for decades). However, her breathing function is fine. Doctor and I jointly ruled out an open lung biopsy to…
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Knowing When to Keep Quite
This is an ongoing battle for me, which I will take measures to adjust/correct in the new year in the same role (caregiving). The attached may help with this journey of change...it helped me just reading it.
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When am I getting out of here? What do you say?
My LO is in MC. But where ever she is, she constantly says, "I can't wait to get out of here." "I am a prisoner." "Where am I going next?" What do you all say to your LOs in these circumstances? She is in a new place near me. But she said the same thing at the before. I need a response that won't upset her and will let her…
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Memory Board - Helpful or frustrating
I moved my mom to an AL after a hospital stay. She has never been open to leaving her house, so I just tell her she's in rehab. The facility has several activities every day and they tell me she participates. When I talk to her, she doesn't remember the activities. She told me this morning she was tired of being stuck in…
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The Alz Connected website is being upgraded
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Music
While waiting in an ER hallway for more than 18 hours I played music on my phone whenever DH was getting a stick or felt anxious. I have about 4 or 5 songs that I play over and over for him. Really helps to calm him down.
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Trying to not fight. Vent
This is long so strap in for my complaining. Apparently the other day my grandmother fell and the word is she's fine just startled and afraid. Which makes sense. My aunt and cousin were trying to get other family members in to sit/watch/reassure gmom for two weeks. For some reason they don't want any lapse in someone there…
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Hospice on board
DH has been in memory care since mid August as I could no longer take care of him after he broke his ankle and also was doubly incontinent. I had been taking care of him for 4 1/2 yrs. with no outside help. Last week he once again was non- responsive and slumped to the side and drooling. They took him to the ER...2nd trip…
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What a day....
My sister stopped by today. I am thoroughly irritated though. She didn't let me know so that right there told me she didn't come with any intention of giving me a break. She stayed for 3 hours. The good news - I have an appointment with an attorney to discuss taking my sister to court for embezzlement and other actions…
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Closer to Stage 7
I'm afraid that hearing about our uncle's death has acted as a catalyst for Peggy's slide. He passed away on the 23rd, and every day since then, including today, Peggy has brought this up. She's a little hazy on whether he's actually dead, ("Uncle N is still dead, right?"), and then right after that, she asks if our aunt…
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Any chance we can take a poll?
So I would like to start by saying that my mother who is 76 has dementia and it is mild right now, but has gotten a little worse this year. My Uncle recently passed away with dementia so it seems I am probably going to have it. The common threads that my uncle, mother, and I have is that (1) we all snore and (2) we all…