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Establishing level of capacity of judgement
Anyone have experience evaluating capacity of judgment? I am being referred to Forensic Psychiatry at a cost of $5,000 to $10,000. Gotta be a better way.
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How to deal with violence
I posted this before but is getting worse and he thinks he is okay. Gets Up early and wanders around the house and says no to everything and lashes out when I tell him to go back to bed. I am not in love with him, just feel an obligation. Can I just leave him and never look back
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Memory Care transition
Well it has been 2.5 weeks since my DH has been in memory care. Prior to this, he spent 3.5 weeks in the hospital. The first couple of days he was there, I literally slept like a log. My bed didn't even look like i had moved a muscle. But as the days wear on I'm finding my big old house so quiet. It's sad. The facility is…
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How does Alzheimer's ASSN help
And how do I actually contact them I live in California
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Does your state medicaid cover MCF?
Spoke with CELA yesterday and found out medicare in CA can cover SNF for patients with dementia who need it but does not cover a MCF. We would have a share of cost but at least we wouldn't have to pay the entire amount ourselves. If I'm not able to keep DH with VD home with help until the end, I'm hoping his poor physical…
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Books, and thermostats
Two questions today… Suggestions, please: My partner has always been a big reader, though she hasn't been able to follow a story (on tv or by reading) for a couple years now. She always wants to carry a book with her and does sort of read it. Everything we have at home has been deemed "too negative," or "not interesting"…
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I haven't posted in quite a while
Every time I think about it, something else happens and I put it off. It's been eighteen months since my DH entered MC and I wish I could say I have adjusted to being alone. My life is full of activities but underneath is the sadness that never goes away. In the evenings, when I am alone, it hits full force and the tears…
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Correction
How best to correct someone with memory loss ?
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GPS Enabled Watch
I don't post often - but I check-in every day for your sage advise! My DH (70) has Alzheimer's + Vascular Dementia and was diagnosed 1.5 years ago using blood test and MRI. The Neuropsychologist conducted testing and concluded he was in the 'Moderate' stage. I (64 F) am trying to work another year before I retire, so he is…
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MC decision
I began visiting MC facilities as my Plan B to be ready if something happens to me. However, after seeing some very nice places I’m thinking more about the improved care he would get there and the extra freedom I’d have. DH is mid stage 6. I’ve been unsuccessful at getting him to shower (I do what I can to keep him clean…
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Constant questions
DW is in stage 6 of Alzheimer's. She is a question machine, and not just with me, with anyone and everyone. It gets frustrating, especially because of the repetition, her asking the same question over and over, unaware that she has already asked numerous times. Her short term memory is totally gone. I do believe her…
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Just need to talk to my friends (208)
HB, thanks for telling me about auto comprehensive paying for rodent damage. I doubt this will be over $1000 which is my deductible. JeriLynn, I would be interested in the device you mentioned that makes a noise to scare rodents. I have those scent packets but don't know how to keep them from falling out but maybe the…
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Quick question I
My DW with EOAD has been losing her vocabulary in the last couple of months. Nothing that comes out of her mouth makes any sense. The words are clear but the composition of the sentence makes no sense I’m thinking because of her shrinking vocabulary. My question is do they also lose their ability to understand what someone…
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Moved husband to memory care and he just wants me
I brought my husband, who is in stage 6, to a memory care facility yesterday and today the director called me. I wasn't really surprised because my main concern was how dependent he is on me and how much he loves being home. Today, there was a woman who looked like me visiting another resident and he thought she was me and…
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Turning Corners and Crossing Bridges
Belated Happy Thanksgiving, y’all! I remain so grateful for this group, the life I’ve had with my DW, and even for parts of the life I still have with her. With that, the holiday was difficult as she turned another corner. Her stepdaughter and family were here, which was so nice on one hand. On the other, my DW asked me…
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Family Visit
Our beautiful son, daughter-in-law and two young grandchildren are visiting next week. Staying elsewhere but I'm a stressed wreck already. Our son and wife are the nicest, kindest couple but this situation with his dad (VD and aphasia) is hard for anyone to comprehend, understand and cope with. He knows that his dad is not…
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This poem by Owen Darnell
Most of you have probably read this before. I just read it yesterday for the first time. It brought tears to my eyes
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Explaining The Disease To Children
DW was diagnosed EOA two years ago. We have an adopted 9-year-old granddaughter who lives with us. I have tried my best to explain the disease to her, but she doesn’t get it. She resents the time I have to spend with DW. She gets mad at her grandma when grandma asks the same question repeatedly. They argue constantly over…
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invisible fiddling
DH has a new symptom. He is constantly trying to unravel, or remove, or pick off….some unseen thing that is obviously real to him. He says, "I'm just trying to get this apart" or, "Well, I can't find the end of it…". He is not distressed, just constantly busy. Sort of like a knitter unraveling their mistaken work.. I think…
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Just needed to release some sadness
My DH exhibits such extreme changes in stages from day to day. Emotional and mood changes seem to be prominent at times- crying in a restaurant over a change in plans. There is much child like behavior. I have learned how to manage this, however my heart is aching. I can’t seem to not let it shock me each time he enters…
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DH Angry Outbursts are Overwhelming me
My DH was diagnosed back in 2019. In the last 2 years the angry Dementia Monster has been getting stronger. We started him on Anti-psychotics in March and it was great for two months. We then increased his dosage in June. Yesterday and today have been extraordinarily BAD. only a month after the increase in dosage. Has…
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Weight Training in later Alzheimer's
My husband has done weight training for a few years with a trainer. He is now moving into the later stages of This Crappy Disease, and he has begun to shuffle. Should we continue the weight training?
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Dreams to Dreads
This picture above says dream if you look close enough. It’s in our bedroom across from the bed. Many mornings my DW would lay there and ask me what I dream about our future together. We enjoyed going over each others dreams and plans for when we retire. Now take that word and replace the M with a D and that’s where I’m at…
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Nail care
my wife’s finger and toe nails are ridiculously long. Who would we hire to cut them? I don’t think a regular nail salon would do it, but maybe I am wrong. Is this something that a podiatrist would do?
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I want to scream and cry
DH is 61. I am 55. We started this journey of finding out what is happening in 2019. We have been through so much testing. Lab work, CSF (borderline for AD) we have even driven to Cleveland Clinic several times for testing. MRI’s 2 years apart showed progression of atrophy in the left temporal lobe. Recent Amyloid PET was…
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When to correct?
Seeking soem conventional wisdom on when and how to "correct" my wife of 48 years. She is mid stages of Alzheimer's and is now most happy talking about her early years of growing up. I try not to "correct" most things but am wondering what to say when she questions who I am, how long we have lived in our home. She believes…
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My DH has passed on
I lost my DH about 2 weeks ago but it still seems unreal. How long before I stop rushing through the grocery store because I can't be away more than a few minutes? When will I finally sleep through the night instead waking multiple times because he needs help? I am grateful that we never reached the point of moving him to…
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Taking advantage of an old post
If you are struggling, or just want to be ahead of the game, check out this post I started in Oct. 2023. It's about a free online 5 day course for caregivers, and the links all seem to be working. Take advantage while you can. https://alzconnected.org/discussion/66891/this-is-fantastic-5-day-course-from-dr-natalie-edmonds
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where do I go for help
my DW is starting to become more aggressive, angry sometimes. There are times I have felt like calling the police but I don't want to do that. Should I call a crisis center instead when she becomes violent and angry? Also, any suggestions on who to reach out to for adult day care centers etc.?? TIA
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Palliative Care
Has anyone on this forum used Palliative Care? Was it helpful? My DH has unspecified Dementia, Bipolar disorder, ADHD, and hoarding. He lives in a very small assisted living. He is ambulatory, can shower and shave himself. He is often confused with delusions and hallucinations.