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Approaching stage 8
My DH, who has been on hospice in a nursing home for a month, had a big downturn last night. He can no longer swallow and is aspirating on his saliva. Hospice has discontinued all food and drink, and now it is a waiting game. He’s getting morphine and Ativan every four hours and seems to be comfortable. It’s hard to…
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This is fantastic! 5 day course from Dr. Natalie Edmonds
A few years ago I took a 5 day course from Dr. Natalie Edmonds. I was told I could share it. This was supposed to not be available anymore, but I was cleaning out my emails tonight, and decided to try the links. They are live. I thought the class was excellent!! If you watch the first one, you'll know if it's for you. I…
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Am I being overly concerned?
My husband is in the mid stage Alzheimer. He showers 3 times a week. On the days he doesn't, he will get dressed before he comes out of our room. I am usually up hours before him. He will put his clothes over his PJ's, won't change his underwear, socks or tee shirt. It drives me crazy. Should I just happy he does it 3…
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Memory Care Activities
My wife has ALZ Stage 4-5. One of my big problems in caring for her is finding things for her to do. She has lost interest in many things and depends on me to fill in her time. We go to our Senior Center often, go for walks and have lunch out at shopping malls. In the evenings we watch TV together. While she is at home now…
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Help Please
Hello everyone - I am hoping you can help direct me on next steps. We just got back from an appointment with my husbands general practitioner. I spoke with the Dr outside of the exam room about my concerns about my husbands change in behavior and attitude. While I didn't expect him to fix it at this appointment I was…
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Hearing aid use and dementia
Another paper found to be wrong. I just read an article about hearing aids aiding in the fight about staving off dementia. I posted a link, but I received a message that their robot would not allow the link. First time I've seen that. I'm sure you could find it with a search. the original paper, “Association between…
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Daughter helping care of DW
I searched all over for comments about my daughter helping me care for my DW. Most of what I saw were complaints/concerns about lack of help. So is it reasonable for me to think that we can do it? And for how long? DW was diagnosed MCI in 2016 and AD 2018. Age 73. Behaviors don't perfectly fit a stage, but it is probably…
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How long does separation anxiety last?
I’m a longtime lurker who’s been on the dementia train with my husband for about six years. He’s probably in the beginning of stage six. For the past few years, he’s had separation anxiety whenever I’m not in the same room. He attended adult day care for 2 years, but was fairly anxious the whole time. Often the day care…
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Sundowners
Could this be sundowning? My DH was married to his first wife for 23 years. We have been married 32 years. This last week, in the evening only, he keeps telling me that he knows he divorced his first wife, but then asks me - did I ever remarry or do I have girlfriends? I’m wondering if this is part of sundowning because it…
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Packing up to go home
I just put my DH in memory care yesterday. This morning the nurse said he had everything packed up to go home. She said he didn’t sleep all night and wouldn’t even take his clothes off last night. Now he’s crying today saying he doesn’t understand why he had to be there. I’ve been told not to go visit for at least a week.…
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Stages
Hi all. I'm new here. Caring for my Husband who was diagnosed about 4 years ago with early onset ALZ . I've been reading the messages and see some of you talking about stages. I'm not sure how do I determine what stage my husband is in? Thank you in advance for your help.
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Shaving solution
I switched DH over to a battery operated electric shaver awhile back and found that if I leave it on the kitchen table he automatically picks it up and uses it while I am preparing the meal. At 3 times a day he is doing a pretty decent job and I don’t have to say anything. All I do is clean it under the kitchen faucet and…
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Major Sundowner
My poor DW has had a few minor sundowning events, but wowzers, did she go all in last night. We ended up dressed and standing on the front porch, ready to “go home” at 9pm with pouring rain and flood warnings. Good thing she didn’t want to get wet, despite the two baseball caps she had put on, and I was able to get her to…
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She has gone to heaven
I cry as I write this. My wife passed yesterday at 2AM. Now I am suffering in stage eight. I don’t know what to do in order to feel better. So I thought I would write my awe full feelings down and send them away. I know others have gone threw this. I am nervous and restless. I am very sad I miss my wife so much. I feel…
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Autoimmune dementia
Hello Everyone, I have just read some articles about Autoimmune dementia. I was wondering if anyone had heard of this / pursued diagnosis of this / sought treatment for this? Thank you.
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Everyone is his Friend
My SO who is 45 EOA thinks he knows everyone when we go out to the store or in public. Most people are receptive and understanding. I feel that since he doesn't go to the store as much as he used to and isn't exposed to the public this is a reaction? However I have also read that this is a part of the disease. He has also…
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May God bless you all
l am thankful for this forum that has so many kind and wise members. Thank you all for the sound advice, good comments and overall generous support. They are very helpful.
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Softening the Bedrails to Prevent Injury
Hello Everyone, this is my first post here, although I have been following many discussions over time as I care for my sweet husband who was diagnosed with mid- stage mixed vascular dementia two years ago. Sadly, he fell and broke his hip two months ago, which of course has affected both his dementia and his progress in…
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LO threatening to get kicked out of MC so he can live on his own.
My dad has been in MC for about 6-8 months. He was previously in two assisted living facilities, but got kicked out because he was wandering outside and getting lost (I got calls from police to pick him up). Since the last time this happened, he was moved into a brand new MC wing in the same facility. It's a nice place —…
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Socializing for Caregivers May Be Overrated
I read an interesting article that indicated that not everyone needs a social network of friends. In fact, some of us do quite well alone without the inevitable dramas that friends bring into our lives. As I am currently without a single local friend due to moving, I found this comforting. I realized that seeking to find…
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Those eyes!! 👀
I totally get it! I get why DH NEEDS to have me within eye sight at all times. I’m his safety I’m his security. I’m coming to terms with the fact that he was never home, always a meeting to go to and I got use to fending for myself and now he follows me everywhere! What is driving me crazy is DH constantly following me…
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Losing my patience as another holiday is ruined!
On thanksgiving I miss my mother (dead for along time, now) and other family members who I never get to see anymore & friends who I also don't get to spend time with. DH has already ruined the day with an outburst and my patience is totally gone. I feel completely alone and like crying, but can't because I'm the only…
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Have I totally lost it?
My DH has been in MC for 2 months. I have an absolute obsession to redecorate (paint and flooring) our living area and bedroom. I have felt like I have been in a prison so my surrounding are a constant reminder of the depressing life I have lived for 6 years. I feel like I am trying to rebuild my life by changing my…
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Spouse Wants to start arguing
1st time to post. My spouse has mild mix dementia. I am basically her only support. She can go couple of days fine but the sundown gets really hold of her. Spouse wants to argue about almost everything. I try to remove myself to another room, she still confronts me. Now she is locking herself in our bedroom. I can easily…
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Have no where to go with my feelings so
Very long post. I have been wanting to write this message for a long time but always get stuck with wondering how best to describe my situation. Saying up front, there is no answer for my issues with my DH, I just think it would be helpful to know if anyone else has had experience with this, or even wondering if I am…
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I moved my DW to memory care today
The move in went ok. I told her I needed surgery on my leg and rehab after. She understood but I could tell she was suspicious that it was a permanent move. We have been together since I was 20 years old. It absolutely killed me to leave her there. I know she feels abandoned and afraid. This is the worst day of my life. I…
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When to transition to full time caregiver?
Hi! I just joined this online support group and have spent almost an hour with the discussions before deciding to post my own discussion. My DH was diagnosed with CAA in 2022 and had mini strokes after a heart surgery late last year. He recovered well from that surgery and all diagnostic tests this year have been ok…
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Giving gifts to external caregivers
Just wondering if anyone gives Christmas gifts to your caregivers? We have one that comes in a couple of times a week. My DH is not at the stage yet where he needs a lot of on hands care except making sure he eats a good lunch but she is still there to support him. She does take care of things around the house while she is…
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Shrinking world
Caring for DW. Currently in stage 4 and some 5 conditions. This is more of a release and venting for me than a question. The longer this goes on the smaller the world becomes. Over the years friends family become more distant. Partly because you're no longer able do the things that we used to. It's even to the point that…
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Very sorry
Hi y’all. I have not been reading or writing lately. I wish everyone love, mercy, understanding, acceptance and peace on their journey. My wife and I are not doing well on ours. She is in stage seven, stuck in a bed or Jerry chair mumbling and not eating. She looks very unhappy and suffering. I don’t want to be a widower…