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Any suggestions?
Okay, need some help here and I know this is the only group that may have some ideas and not judge. My DH has been sundowning fierce! I have locks and alarms on the doors so he can't get outside. I usually get up and guide him to the bathroom then tell him the time and guide him back to bed. He becomes resistant so I let…
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What is normal progression?
I’m confused about something. Maybe a dumb question. I’m not sure what I should perceive as further progression/decline that I should just accept vs. symptoms that require further managing. Here is the scenario. DH’s behavior has been manageable and I can usually redirect him when he starts to get upset about something. We…
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I am a very lucky man
We have one daughter who has been a great help with her mother (my wife). She has been sick with coronavirus, as has her husband. So we haven't seen her for a while. Another daughter, a good cook, brought us stuffed cabbage, potatoes, green beans, and peach pie today. She said she would like to make dinner for us every…
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I guess he told me!
Whenever the caregiver or I look the other way, DH now spends his day grabbing anything in reach and putting it in his mouth. Chewing off a piece if possible, and gnawing on it forever, it seems. This requires constant vigilance and redirection.😟It is impossible to put EVERYTHING up. CD case, towel hanging on the rack…
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The Cavalry Is Not Coming (reposted for new platform)
As promised, I have re-posted this to the new platform so folks could find it. The Cavalry Is Not Coming April 1, 2023 marked seven and a half years since my wife’s dementia became obvious, and that I knew for certain that this journey would begin. I had sensed something was “a bit off” before then, but that date stands…
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Is Remission Possible in Lewy Body Dementia?
It's been over 6 months since Depakote was added to DH's meds. He continues to do extremely well, as if the disease never happened—a complete turnaround from the aggressive, combative and deranged psychopath he displayed last October (not caused by UTI infection). If you didn't know it, he appears/behaves as normal as can…
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MC hookups
At times when I visit my DW in MC she is sitting with and holding hands with another resident. The male resident said to me that she, my DW, was his girlfriend and that she was beautiful. I think it's innocent enough and I don't think he would touch her inappropriately at least I hope not. I'm ok with them finding comfort…
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Another MC Question
After a year in her second facility, my partner is both more settled and more progressed in her disease. She is having more sensory processing issues—sounds and sights don't make a lot of sense to her and she misinterprets. A lifelong introvert, she is also in the noisiest part of the complex—a room right outside the…
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Thoughts
I went to every doc appt. Kept telling them about the continued memory loss, personality changes. He is freezing all the time and continues to loose weight. He scored a 10/30 on his SLUMS. I felt like I was banging my head on a brick wall…like no one was listening. I'm witnessing this slow, agonizing decline that I can't…
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Preparing for in home care
Yesterday I had a semi-productive meeting with a VA social worker. We have been offered up to 30 days of care in our home, the care will only be for 6 hours a day. In addition, they have one single respite bed (for hundreds or more vets) at their facility that is available for up to 14 days but those hours will be deducted…
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Placement Decision
At some point I will have to decide about placing my wife in a memory care facility. This will be difficult. I know many of you have already been through this. I would be interested in any information you would be willing to share on how and why you decided on placement.
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new to this group...
Hi, I am new to this group. I first noticed something was off with my DW in early 2019. After lots of reluctance and denial, we got a EO ALZ diagnosis in late 2021. Right now, I am 57 she is 59. I would estimate we are in the middle of stage 5. Fortunately my DW mostly remains pleasant and cooperative throughout. She did…
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Interior keyed door locks
A quick thank you to whoever posted about making sure you have a room inside your home where you can lock yourself in for safety. No, I haven't needed to do that yet as DH is pretty quick to diffuse thanks to two antidepressants meds he's taking. However, he is starting to show a tiny bit of sundowning on occasion and I…
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The niggling things that add up
no wonder we are all tired. I play a constant juggling game in my mind that wears me out before I get anything done. I need to get the oil changed in the car, the time to do that is before a MC visit, since it’s on the way (but it’s 45 minutes each way). So scheduled it for this morning, but then the cleaners called and…
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New diagnosis after 4 years
I am brand new to this group. As I am reading your posts I am encouraged by the support you give one another. I sure could use it! My DH started showing signs of dementia 4 years ago. We have been going to the doc all this time. One week ago, after doing some tests, they have diagnosed him with vascular dementia. Even…
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Getting so disappointed with myself
Every morning I try to tell myself that this will be the day I have the patience and positivity I need to get through the repeated questions, the intense shadowing, the snapping at me for no good reason. And most every day, I disappoint myself. With my DH in probably late Stage 5, I should know better than to argue or snap…
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Do you visit your spouse in MC daily?
I've been tryiing to visit my DW in MC at least every other day but it's becoming difficult in the sense that at first my DW is glad to see me and I her. After an hour or so she becomes agitated with me, sometimes for not being there 24/7 like I used to, or when it's time to leave. She looks hurt and sad and I'm sure she…
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A hybrid Memory Care plan?
My DH has been in MC for about three months. Prior to that, when he was home, the biggest issues were sundowning from about 3 to 6 in the afternoon when he would get manic and confused, and waking up at night to go pee but going in inappropriate places in the house or going outside to pee off the deck. The sundowning was…
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Fibs for MC intake
I am going to move DW to a MC place in June. Among the things I’m worried about, one is what story to tell her, which can be shared with family and friends when they visit her in MC. Any suggestions that have worked well for any of you? I am advised that it should be short, simple, and not anxiety-producing. But any…
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Can you flunk out of Geri-psych?
My DH has been in Geri-psych 3 days, and last night went on a tear. The nurses had to lock themselves and the other patients in and call security. Because of the Memorial Day weekend, they haven’t done much adjusting of his meds; I think they added an extra 50 mg of Seroquel. Do they ever kick patients out of Geri-psych?
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Passing of family member - do I tell?
Hello Everyone - My uncle passed away last night after a brief illness. He was my Dad's brother. Both my Mom and Dad are in AL both under Hospice care… my Dad is in the later stages, my mom in earlier stages but had a TIA in April that has started the decline. My Dad doesn't know who I am, so I don't think he will remember…
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Keeping Loved Ones Home As Long As Possible
My DH is still doing okay going into our 4th year of Alzheimers diagnosis. We have a 3 bedroom home. My daughter and 12 year old son live with us so there are no extra bedrooms. I would like him to be at home as long as possible and as long as I am able to care for him. He is 86 and I am 81. Physically we are both in good…
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Bedtime problem
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I'm concerned about DH medical care in MC
When DH entered MC in January this year he was using a Spireva inhaler to control his COPD. Since then, the MC doctor first changed him to a different inhaler and then discontinued that and started giving him albuterol breathing treatments three to four times a day. DH came down with bronchitis in March and was extremely…
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When to make the next move
Hi there. I am caring for my bf who is 44 with eosa. We just recieved the diagnosis last October. Things have been fine except as of the last month or so there is a "him / he" (imaginary person) that goes into his room (where he keeps his clothes and shoes) that messes with them. We have him on Zyprexa (onlazapine) and…
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Nostalgic Music Affects Brain and Memory
An interesting piece-
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I need someone to talk to
Hello all! I'm new here. Lucky me, right? 😟 My Mother-in-law had Alzheimers and passed many years ago. I now fear my husband is in the early stages along with adult onset ADHD. Me?? I'm losing my mind!!! He can't remember anything and constantly makes excuses for his behavior by saying things like 'Why should I remember…
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Tone Deaf Invitation
A couple with whom DH and I have been close friends for 40 plus years just invited ME to a small dinner party celebrating the wife's 80th birthday. The invitation spelled out that I should get one of my children to watch my DH and just come by myself. I am miffed and maybe even insulted by this request. Has this happened…
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Stove top covers
what would be best to purchase to put over knobs on stove. I cannot pull knobs off my stove. I need covers. Something easy. Thanks.
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Can others understand?
I think I know the answer… but friends and family are interested and care for me and my DH, but when they say things like “I understand, my mom had memory issues and I had to help her twice a week“ I realize they have no idea of what it’s like to be the sole caregiver at home for your life partner. We’ve not (yet) been for…