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Catch-22
Well, I seem to have encountered a Catch-22. I explained our situation (wife with early dementia) to a lawyer, who said I would need a letter from my wife’s doctor before she (the lawyer) would draft a Power of Attorney. My wife’s doctor wrote a letter saying that my wife is cognitively impaired and that a POA would be…
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Grateful
thank you all for the kind supportive words. Note: my wife has been in hospice for six months now she has two small bed sores on her hip and buttock
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 12/8/24
GOD TEACHES AND LEADS YOU AND ME Isaiah 48:17 New Living Translation “This is what the Lord says— your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is good for you and leads you along the paths you should follow.” I am always asking the Lord for His guidance. I suspect you do too. He…
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Kisssing in MC
My husbands MC called last night to tell me that DH and a female resident had shared a mutual kiss on the lips. The nurse said they were going to do their best to keep them separated. My first reaction was, "Oh, ****" although I didn't say it out loud. The nurse said she was sorry and we hung up. I didn't know whether to…
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How he parts his hair -
So much of Alzheimer’s is heartbreakingly sad, especially when our loved ones stop generating conversations, but occasionally something is said that causes heartfelt mirth. I shower, dress, and most every night tuck my husband in even though he’s in memory care facility. While combing his hair after a shower, I asked him…
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Ftd
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Donepezil & Memantine your opinions
my wife has been on Memantine about 6 months Nurologist added Donepezil anyone use both at same time ???
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Guns
Hi my father is in the early stages of Alzheimer’s. We live in rural Alaska and he has always had an arsenal of guns in our home. He always carries one with him everywhere we go. He hasn’t given me any reason or worries about his guns. He also hasn’t shot them in almost year or so. But I know there is going to be a day…
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STAGE 8 - There is no other side of grief...
My soulmate husband Lonny passed August 12. I feel lost most of the time but am trying to find myself without him. Found this on a Facebook post today. So true. I had my own notion of grief. I thought it was the sad time, that followed the death of someone you love. And you had to push through it to get to the other side.…
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eating habits regressing
DH has ES Alz…but lately, he seems to be regressing in HOW he eats…licking the knife after putting on peanut butter on toast, licking his fingers at the table instead of using his napkin…basic good manners. Is this just him or is this a thing?
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Turning Corners and Crossing Bridges
Belated Happy Thanksgiving, y’all! I remain so grateful for this group, the life I’ve had with my DW, and even for parts of the life I still have with her. With that, the holiday was difficult as she turned another corner. Her stepdaughter and family were here, which was so nice on one hand. On the other, my DW asked me…
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Lack of comprehension
My DH is Stage 6 Alz and under Hospice care. I am currently at 10 years on our journey with this disease and certainly there have been challenges but for the most part I feel I have handled it fairly well. For awhile now I have not been able to understand what he is saying. However the last week or so my DH no longer seems…
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hallucinations
:(
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hallucinations
My wife just started to have hallucinations and keeps me awake in bed. Any suggestions
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Love & go on...
A friend posted this on Facebook and I thought it might help someone who lost a loved one this year. I'm having a hard time this year. Love & hugs to you all. 🙏💜
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Want to get this off of my chest
Hi y’all. I haven’t been reading or writing lately. May everyone find mercy ,under standing, acceptance and peace on your journey. My wife and I are not doing well on ours. She is in stage seven now. Stuck in bed or a Jerry chair not eating mumbling and looking like she is miserable. I cry every time I see her and get very…
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Expected taxes from SSDI (disability) income??
Hello, My husband is 56, diagnosed with EO Alzheimer's in November of '23 (at age 55), but showed obvious signs of decline beginning at about age 52-53. I'm so relieved that he was approved for SSDI in October (5 months after applying) and we will receive his first disability check this month. It will come RIGHT as his…
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Ambiguous Grief
Bill recently used the term "ambiguous grief," and I didn't know what it meant. Here's what some Googling turned up: …search results for the meaning and symptoms of dementia and caregivers' ambiguous grief. Ambiguous Grief in Dementia Caregiving: Physical Presence, Psychological Absence: Dementia causes a gradual loss of…
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How long did your loved ones stay in stage 5, 6, and 7?
I’ve read Tam Cummings staging and estimated duration of each. I’m curious as to everyone’s experience here on the time your LO’s spent in each of these stages? My DH went through 3 and 4 fast (just over a year) and is a solid 5 now with a couple of cognitive areas in 6. Do most make it to 7? I can handle a lot but am…
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Estate Planning for Long Term Care
I was on Colorado Medicaid for Seniors website and found some interesting information. They mentioned working with a Medicaid Planning Professional if you are over-income and/or over-asset. Have you ever done this or used Eldercare Resource Planning (a company they connected me to}?
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 12/1/24
GOD IS WITH YOU AND ME Psalm 139:16-18 New International Version “Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. 17 How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! 18 Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand—…
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What to say before taking DH to a day care place for a first time visit.
Hi, I have a question about what to say to my DH before I take him to visit a day care facility tomorrow. I am still his full time care taker with occasional help with our adult children. I am thinking of starting him out one half day a week and going from there, depending on how he does. He will want to know where we are…
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Epitome of Grief
Flying home yesterday with my husband from a lovely last hurrah holiday at a beautiful resort visiting good friends, our son, and grandchildren; he assimilates easily back into his memory care facility as he just doesn’t know, but I’m inconsolably choked with tears . During this getaway, I looked straight into my husband’s…
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Bathroom issues
Maybe I’m in the dark about what to expect, but this evening my husband went to the bathroom, was in there a long time. I went in to see what he needed and there was a mess in the sink and on the toilet seat. I’m not sure what transpired when he was in there but I’m thinking I need to hang out outside the bathroom door…
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Help with fiblet - moving DW into MC
I am moving my DW into MC next week and I am trying to come up with a fiblet to tell her on move in day. My SIL suggested that I tell her that I need to go back to OH (we live in WI) to take care of my older sister for a time and that I found a place for her to stay while I am gone. I do think she will buy this fiblet but…
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Its Our Turn. Preparing to say farewell...
Unbelievably, though we knew it was coming in the not too distant future, DH is transitioning right before my eyes. He rallied in the last 2 weeks, and now suddenly we are walking through the steps for last day/s on this earth. I will let you know when I can. For now, I have been assured by hospice that he is in very good…
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Driving
Hi all My OH is currently being assessed at a memory clinic. We have not had a formal diagnosis, we visited the memory clinic, late October, and this is the first time we have met the consultant, or in fact any fully qualified doctor, previously it was a junior doctor and an OT. I think based on my OH ACE III test score he…
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Feeling Very Thankful
I just want to express my sincere appreciation to all of you who show up on this site. The shared experiences, rants and raves, insights, advice and love and shared vulnerabilities have made a real difference to me in how I’m able to navigate my day to day with my DW. Wishing You All the very best Thanksgiving possible.…
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Holidays without him.
Last year 11/23/23 was the last holiday I spent with my DH Lonny. I have no pictures of that day. Shortly thereafter I was diagnosed with aggressive cancer & had no choice but to place him immediately in Memory Care. He spent Christmas alone there. It broke my heart in two. He passed August 12th and I am dreading the…
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How to help Grands understand??
My DH this afternoon just snapped and yelled at our grand-daughter for not speaking to him when she came in. Cussing and saying he was not taking that damn sh*t no more from her🤦♀️🤦♀️…. She is 12 and it really hurt her feelings and she didn't know what to do. I was a good buffer got him turned around and back in house. I…