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A new diagnosis
Recently the diagnosis for my spouse is vascular dementia. I do not know what to do next or what help to get. I would appreciate any suggestions. Thank you
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I Am On My Own Now
I continue to go to this site numerous times a day - the empathy and experience of the participants here is the best support I have found. I am in a place now where a lot of you have found yourself in - I'm alone in this horrible ambiguous grief cycle called Alzheimer's. Bill posted "The Calvary is not Coming" and I read…
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No more driving
My husband has Alzheimers and recently took a road test for triple A at his doctor's suggestion. I found out the results yesterday and it didn't go well at all. How did you break the news to them that they had to stop driving? He's only 73.
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Just need to vent
After reading so much about the trials that so many of you have I feel bad about whining about my situation. My DW is really very easy to care for, her short term memory is pretty much gone and she seems to live in the moment, with no concerns about yesterday or tomorrow but she takes care of her own ADL's and is quite…
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Traveling
Hope you all are hanging in there as best you can. I am sitting on this quiet morning, DW asleep, and enjoying a little time to myself. Well, sort of enjoying. My mind is spinning away about a trip I need to take to visit my parents back in the midwest. A five hour flight, potentially with my DW. I know it will be a…
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Swallowing problems in Alz.
I mentioned this in my question about hospice timing, but still have questions someone might be able to answer. To recap, my husband is 71 and was diagnosed with Early Onset Alzheimer’s and vascular dementia about 8 years ago. He also has diabetes and some other things. He is mostly stage 6 now, and has lots of confusion,…
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Apple watch and falls
DW was always the techie and now my son in law has the role Everyone insisted I should get an Apple Watch for its fall notification. When your children are as smart as mine you do as you are told. so I got the watch On my recent cruise through the Panama canal I was in Puerto Vallarta Mexico and I tripped on the curb and…
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Just saying hello
New to this. I’m Jack and I recently retired to stay home and take care of the wife, who is in the mid stages of Alzheimer’s. We do ok mostly i guess. Sure could use a little more of her boys help. It’s a shame but they just don’t know how bad she’s getting. Cause when they do come we try our best to act normal I guess.…
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PACE
Please share your experiences with the PACE program. I've just initiated contact with them. I'll post here once I get more info. If your loved one is receiving PACE services, please share details and tips, hours, ADL requirements, and whether you act as the PCA or bring someone in. Thank you. What is the Program of…
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A few positives
Good evening all. Or should I say morning. 1. Last Thursday night I went to check on him, as he was taking even longer to come to bed...we were entering hour 3 of the going to bed routine. He said he needed a little help. I went in and there was blood all over the floor. He had tried to cut an ingrown toe nail, and cut his…
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Struggling to stay strong and get a bit of my life back
New to the group. I've been trying to deal with my husband's dementia in my own but it's too much. He's had dementia for 3 years now and in the past 6 months has had 2 vascular surgeries and a stroke. He is so weak and frail in addition to the cognitive decline. He struggles to even use a walker so getting out to even walk…
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Hospice started
Hello friends My husband was approved for hospice today. I'm all over the place. I'm sad and exhausted. It was hard to hear that we're at this point. I'm weirdly relieved in some ways. But honestly, I'm not ok. I appreciate all of you who have helped me so far. I'll continue to lean on this forum full of truly kind people…
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Explosive Diarrhea - Oh My!
Hello All - Just commiserating here with fellow spousal caregivers who've battled the awful specter of explosive diarrhea with you LOs. Just finished up my latest battle tonight and have to report it wasn't too bad. Last time was over a year ago and I was an awful mess, and I was mad, cussing and really didn't handle it…
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Pros and cons of home care vs memory care--and misperceptions? For educational purposes
This came up on another thread so I thought I'd start it off. I was struck by comments that a PWD had to be nonambulatory or completely unable to perform any ADL's before they were appropriate for MC, neither of which is the case. As someone who had to place my partner under some duress and for whom the adjustment has been…
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Security and Door Locks
My DH doesn't wander yet, but sometimes I'll notice he is outside in the yard and I'm getting increasing uncomfortable with the idea that wandering might be next. So - I'm looking for advice on how to lock my doors so that I can know when he walks out! I have steel frame doors, and a lot of the locks I see online won't…
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I'm just starting the journey and need advice
After three months in a SNF for various orthopedic problems, my husband's dementia "flared" which caught me by surprise as I hadn't really understood that his "memory" medications were for dementia. (it's a long story). Anyway...in January he had delusions where I was accused of conspiring with his doctor to keep him…
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@Eaglemon and other experienced members
Please respond to Aayusi on the Living with Alzheimer's board. She has a complicated history with major depression, cutting and suicidal ideation. I have flagged her posts twice. Her thread is "Don't want to lose the memories". Iris
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This Group is my Lifeline - Thanks!
I continue to go to this site numerous times a day - the empathy and experience of the participants here is the best support I have found. I am in a place now where a lot of you have found yourself in - I'm alone in this horrible ambiguous grief cycle called Alzheimer's. Bill posted "The Calvary is not Coming" and I read…
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Important (and classic) free book: Understanding the Dementia Experience
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I bought a house. I wish I could feel happy and excited about it.
But I don't. I'm spending our life savings in the Medicaid spend down. It's a nice house and in a nice neighborhood. All my memories are here in this house though. And I miss my husband so much! He has been in memory care for two months and I still feel like I am dying from grief. It hit me today that I am going to have to…
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Update - haven't posted in awhile. Been overwhelmed.
To recap: December 5th, I had to immediately place my DH in MCF because of my devastating diagnosis of a rare aggressive form of breast cancer that I needed immediate and aggressive treatment for. I placed him in a facility and he got great care but it was very expensive. I applied for the VA Nursing Home facility and he…
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Good article - Tips on preventing aspiration
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My mom accusing of us stealing
I was extremingly angry. Held it for a couple of days and got into a storm argument with my mom. I was outrageously angry at her today. How do I do it so I don’t take it personal? Same happens 3 years ago when she did that and I over come it. Now, it happened again. Advise please
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video from new england journal of medicine
https://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJMp2310177?query=TOC&cid=NEJM%20eToc,%20March%2021/28,%202024%20DM2332180_NEJM_Non_Subscriber&bid=-2122372168
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A life sentence
I feel so god-forsaken. My DH is in stage 6 (I think) and his constant combativeness and total confusion ruin every single waking day. Truth is I don't even like him anymore and we've been married for 50 years. When he was diagnosed the neurologist said "this isn't a death sentence" and I remember thinking "no, it is a…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 3/4/24
FRIENDS, just want you to know I read all your comments and appreciate them. The Holy Spirit is with you and me here and everywhere. Peace, Ronnie (Veronica Kelly Badowski) * COURAGE Genesis 1:1 NIV “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.” Joshua 1:9 NKJV “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good…
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POSITIVE BALANCE
When I was a caregiver, I was on a seesaw. One side was attending to the needs of those I cared for, and the other side was attending to my own needs. Both sides were important. Both sides needed attention. The aim was to keep the seesaw balanced so one side did not go crashing to the ground. Perhaps looking back, I…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 3/23/24
FRIENDS, just want you to know I read all your comments and appreciate them. The Holy Spirit is with you and me here and everywhere. Peace, Ronnie (Veronica Kelly Badowski) * CONFUSION Isaiah 5:20 New International Version "Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness,…
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Visiting too often?
My DH has been in memory care for almost 3 weeks. The first week was very hard, but since then, he’s seemed to be adapting to it. I’ve been visiting daily, for about an hour, and my daughter often sees him in the evening. A few days ago, when I arrived, he was playing a word game with the group and he was having such a…
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Am I crazy, or is the doctor?
I don't know if anyone else has experienced this, but here's hoping someone can shed a little light on what to do about our current situation. As background, we are exploring MC placement for my DH, who tested in the "mild dementia" range in late 2022. Lately he has been having episodes of aggression and rage which are…