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Take me Home
I know many of you hear this on a regular basis - my DH is fixated on this over the past few days more than usual. Usually I can just say "we are home" he goes and looks outside recognizes the house and comes back in. Not so much this morning. We are in MN and that was what it was all about this morning - having to "go…
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Bad day - just a vent
Today started with the discovery of a mess in the bathroom. My poor husband had accident and tried to clean it up, gave up and got back in bed. I apparently slept through it. So, after I cleaned the bathroom, showered him, and stripped the bed, I had him calmly eating breakfast. His aide arrived and things were going…
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Wife using excuse of not feeling well
My DW routinely uses the excuse that she is not feeling well to avoid leaving the house, following through on plans, or doing anything other than watching television. The “illnesses” are always something like a head cold (which she shows no symptoms of), or similar minor conditions. Obviously she is using the faux…
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New
Hi All- Just found this site and wanting to learn. Wife was practicing Endocrinologist diagnosed in april 2023. Lost all income and moved to another state to be closer to family. She is only 57. We were not ready for this-- Financially or emotionally. Finally able to find a house so settling in, but just overwhelmed with…
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Has anyone come up with why they HATE to bath ???
Why is showing or bathing such an issue with this illness. I’m not there yet but not looking forward to that scenario.
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 1/15/24
OUR HOPE IS GOD’S UNFAILING LOVE Psalm 147:5 New Living Translation 5 How great is our Lord! His power is absolute! His understanding is beyond comprehension! 11 No, the Lord’s delight is in those who fear him, those who put their hope in his unfailing love. When the winds of sickness, stress, anger and fear are strong and…
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Young wife won't get testing ever
My wife and I are 51-years-old. Our 29-year relationship went from perfect to impossible over the last 3 years. I suspect based on 9 of 10 signs that my wife has MCI or Alzheimer's but she says the examples are trivial and coincidental at best. Recently she has proclaimed that she will never get tested because it would not…
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Glad to have found this space
My mom is a PWD and her situation is somewhat complicated by the fact she has osteoporosis. It has been a crazy roller coaster over the last 18 months or so. I lived about 400 miles away but visited twice a year and talked to Mom on the phone every week. She had been having a few noticeable memory issues but we just…
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personal training
DW goes to personal training once a week. The PT is aware of DW's dementia. The PT is concerned with DW's range of motion, balance, flexibility, posture, not strength, and directs DW's exercising accordingly. The problem: DW comes home and complains bitterly that the PT doesn't make her work hard enough. She doesn't sweat,…
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Here’s to a better year
Well it’s been awhile since I have posted. It has been foggy and grey since the beginning of December, my SAD is triggered. However, if it was sunny, I would feel disoriented as well. I am slowly coming up for air, going out and helping my mother a lot. I suddenly remember that he is gone, then the grief sets in. However,…
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Elder Care Consult
I have a 15 min consult scheduled for Monday with an CELA and then we will do an in person one. My question is, should I include my DH in on either one? I don’t know what stage he is, but he is capable of a lot of things. I wouldn’t solely trust him with any decisions but I feel I still need to include him on somethings.…
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Self Care Resource - Adult Coloring Pages
Forum mates - I am posting this here as well as the Caregiver's forum, in case you can use it. Linking the post and coloring pages resource below. Have fun if you choose to use any! (Free)
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Activities
My DW has moderate Alz. Are there any games that you have found to be enjoyable? Thanks
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GPS Tracking
Hello, I am new to this group, my DH diagnose with Alzheimer six year ago. He dose not like to stay home he want to be outside all the time. I am worried he will sneak out at night. Do you know what the best tracking device? I am looking for something can wear all the time like wrist ban. Thank you
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Huge weight off my mind!!!
Today I sold my wife’s car. This has been her biggest issue when she was told last year NO driving. Wife has beautiful 2007 Mercedes that was her pride and joy. Worked hard for it leased first 3 yrs then purchased. She loves that car.i would get rid of it has felt would upset her, but she’s become very money spending…
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What could this be?
It all started last friday with a sore throat and run down feeling, not much in the way of fever but persistant excessive coughing day and night. I've been trying to manage my DW all week who is dbl incontinent. I don't feel like I have the flu but just a chest cold. Evey cold seems to get me in the chest and I cough for…
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Husband does not recognize me
My husband does not recognize me as his wife. This started gradually and he would recover from it, but this last time has been three days. He doesn’t know where she went and doesn’t know who I am. How do I communicate with him? Others tell him I am his wife but he says no.
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plan B options
I've been researching memory care facilities in my area as part of my plan B and came across something new: a 2-bedroom unit within a larger memory care complex that accommodates the healthy spouse, (basically I would live there too). At first, I thought it sounded a bit strange, but, it might actually be a good option. It…
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Toilet hygiene
My DH sometimes had soiled pant or sheets at night, as a result he started to use depends disposable pull ups at night. He gets confused and puts them in the wash or hides theme!The worse problem is that he is not cleaning himself properly after pooping so disposable are dirty! Any ideas how to get around that problem? I…
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Ashamed
Gaahhh. I got into a fight with my DW yesterday. What in the world is wrong with me? I haven’t argued with her in years. It’s been 3 years of this, I know her brain is not functioning right and yet there I was, acting like she was my DW with nothing going wrong with her. Can I still possibly be in denial? Am I losing my…
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My DW's caregiver
My DW is declining and it is a hard thing to watch. We both live in an Assisted Living facility and the staff seems to be content to let me tend to each and every one of my DW's needs and requests, etc. I have Parkinson's disease and I feel as though my own needs are not getting met. It doesn't feel like anyone is…
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Tell me the obvious bc I am depleted
My LO isn't safe to be alone per dr. I have been dx with pneumonia and need to heal or will end up in hospital or worse. My LO's POA plans to call her and suggest she stay with her POA a few days while I am contagious. This is a necessity, right? Wow. I hear myself as I write and am pseudo feeling okay bc of treatments and…
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Struggling with guilt and frustration
I have been my husband's sole caregiver for the past 3 years. During part of the time I was caregiving for him, I was diagnosed with cancer and had to work full time, go through chemo and take care of him as well. After much thought and contemplation, my husband is now living in a full-time memory care for facility. The…
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New here
Hi Y'all, I was just sitting here having a pity party when i found this site. I read many of your comments and much of the advise given and already feel a bit better. My DW who has been my partner for over 50 years is somewhere between stage 4 and 5. I feel very fortunate in that she voluntarily stopped driving a couple…
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Girl From North Country
So I had these tickets for 8 months. way before the denial coma I was in. Yesterday started out with him accusing me of stealing his keys(which is true) So we head out the door and he heads to the driver’s seat. After he yells at the poor Amazon driver we are off with me driving. He says he doesn’t want to go to this…
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Can cannabis help LO's agitation and confusion?
My DH is in stage 5/6 of dementia and is often confused and agitated, refusing to change into clean clothes when there's been an accident, insisting on doing yard work in 32 degree weather and is unable to communicate due to his aphasia and word salad. It's been recommended that we try a low dose of cannabis (legal here)…
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Housing Issues Maybe?
Thanks everyone for the warm welcome back. We live in a 3 level townhouse and I’m not sure what to do about our living situation. He has lived here for 45 years and me 15. Should I try to renovate it for easier access or do we move to a one level place? It’s only the two of us and as someone here said “The Calvary Is Not…
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Reaching Out!
Hello, I am a new member and reaching out to help relieve my stress that I'm going through! My DH has had Alzheimer's for 6 years now, us being married 54 years and retired 20 years and within the last couple of months he is not recognizing me all the time. It starts late afternoons lasting until bedtime, which I found out…
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A different kind of film of love and dementia
I'm not sure how much of reality is there, but I want to see it. https://www.thedailybeast.com/obsessed/the-eternal-memory-the-sensational-love-story-that-should-win-an-oscar
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When to Move Spouse to Memory Care Facility
My 74 year old wife’s dementia has rapidly worsened. When the time comes for a professional memory care facility, what steps can I take to prepare her for the move?