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Guilt Trip(1)
Mom increasingly uses guilt trip tactics to arm wrestle me into submission. She's wants to stay in the home until death even through she says "as long as I can". By saying "as long as I can" allows her to be in control of the timing. She is fixated on burial in her home town 1,266 miles away and repeatedly tells stories…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 3/1/22
DO NOT BE TROUBLED * John 14:27 Amplified Bible "Peace I leave with you; My [perfect] peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be afraid. [Let My perfect peace calm you in every circumstance and give you courage and strength for every challenge.]" * me:…
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I’m just frustrated.
Today, I received a text from a childhood friend. She expressed to me she fears that Mom, my LO with AD living in a SNF since May 2021, “…is alone more than she should be.” Also, recently, one of Mom’s younger brothers said he would not be returning to the SNF because “…it smells like a nursing home,” and that I should be…
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Packing for move to assisted living tips
Hello- My LO will be moving to her own small apartment in assisted living in a few weeks. I’m looking for your tips, tricks etc. What to take vs what not to take. Any advice to make the tradition go smoothly. Things you wish you had or had not done. She will have a microwave and refrigerator kitchenette and her own private…
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Respite care for vacation - does this exist?
We're looking for respite care for my MiL (mid-staged, moderate Alzheimer's) so that we can take our first vacation in nearly three years. We're having a hard time finding anyone who will take her at all, let alone for less than 30 days minimum (who can go away for 30 days and still need respite care services?). And even…
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Loved one with dementia at a wedding?
My name is Melanie and I’m 26 years old. This past December my fiancé proposed to me. It was a beautiful moment but short lived. We decided to get married in June 2022. The sooner the better for my dads sake. He has some sort of dementia. We never got a full diagnosis but symptoms started in June of 2020. He is bed bound…
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Abandoned by family and friends
My mother was a very active and social person in the before times. She had so many friends and social events that it was often hard for me to keep up with her calendar! Lunch with the girls, yoga and coffee after, prayer group, movie club etc. etc. Not to mention our big family where she never forgot a niece or nephew's…
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Verbal rollercoaster
DH’s language skills are swinging wildly in stage 6d... A short while ago he tells me: “something must be getting caught in my internal affairs” (he had the hiccups). Extra words flow and I can at least comprehend what he’s trying to communicate— then not 3 minutes later he tries to share a thought and couldn’t even finish…
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Non sleep and fidgeting?
My mother, aged 94 with fairly advanced dementia, recently and fairly quickly went bonkers. She hasn't been sleeping at night (3 nights in a row now) fidgets incessantly, and has been agitated which is totally out of character. We have put her on an antibiotic for a UTI, because she fits all the symptoms. I hope to get the…
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Treating my dad like a child
My dad lives with me and my family. He often behaves in a way that my 2 daughters aren’t allowed to behave. We lead by example and hold my dad to the same standards as our children. For example: Yesterday we ate spaghetti for supper. Dad didn’t eat all his food. We told him to put his bowl in the fridge so he could finish…
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Looking for Non-Virtual Support Group
I've been living a very different, hellish life for the past year, and I'm sure that DW's has been even worse as she went from a healthy, happy, 75 year old who embraced life, loved to cook, travel, read, exercise, and get together with friends, to a very different now 76 year old who sits in our condo all day, won't…
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Mattress for hospital bed
I laid down in my LO’s bed today. It’s horrible! When the time comes, I don’t want her to be bedridden in that thing! Has anyone bought a good mattress and put it on the hospital bed frame? What kind did you buy? It will need to bend and not be too thick. She’s short and we have the bed as close to the floor as we can get…
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A lot going on
My dad’s shingles are cleared up. He has bells palsy, which numbs the pain in his jaw. So he doesn't think that he needs surgery to remove his 8 pieces of teeth. But Bob is still taking him to get that done tomorrow morning. And in a couple of months, after everything else is healed, he's having surgery to remove the…
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CBD Gummies
Are you pro or con? What level? What brand? Can you use them with other meds? Thanks!
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How to answer why am I here (in MC facility)? Is it ever appropriate to tell the truth?
My dad and I recently moved my 68-year old mother into a memory care facility. Today is her two-week anniversary there, and it's already a struggle. She gets stuck in a "loop" asking questions: why do I have to be here? When can I go home? I didn't do anything wrong, why am I wearing an ankle bracelet? Why are you lying to…
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Alzheimer's is winning
Momma is getting worse, quickly. Won't cooperate with taking meds. Has started pocketing food. Can't use a straw. We are giving her liquids with a syringe. Eating less good food, more sweets. Her body is drawing up, her legs are tucked up close to her body very tightly when lying on her back. When on her side they are…
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What to ask on tour of care facility
I've finally started to make some decisions about what to do with my mom. I have given up my own home life to move in with her for 11 months (luckily could still keep working). I now feel that she would be better off in a community with plenty of activities and new friends, and is able to function enough without me…
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36Hour Day... Dad wont accept help with Mom...audible Eye Rolls and more fun in the life of Alz.
I am Lisa. I am 54, so not too wet behind the ears, but needing to vent, question, commiserate, seek help and all the other mundane needs of a caregiver to an Alz LO. My mom is turning 78 this year. My dad is 80. They will have been married 59 years in March. They have never dated others, have never lived apart, have never…
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Aggressive behavior(4)
So how many of you have an aggressive LO. Mine is at stage 6, never wanted to go to assisted living, however for several reasons it became too hard and really impossible to keep her at home. She is often verbally aggressive, since going into the facility she has become physically aggressive too. Today, she dealt the staff…
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Having issues coping!
My mom was diagnosed about 5 years ago with dementia. But in the last year it has progressed extremely fast. We placed her in an assisted living facility almost two years ago. My mom use to be so active in many different groups and loved to spend time with my niece. Watching someone go from so active to not able to do…
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Cancer and other health problems now
LO (age 78) is going on 3 years now since officially diagnosed with vascular-based dementia (and possibly AD). Realistically probably 4-5 years since she started showing early signs (interesting how in hindsight you see all the signs more clearly). I would say she is at stage 5 going into 6 now. I've been taking care of…
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Does anyone else have these issues??
Does anyone else have this issue? Wife of 58 years was “officially” diagnosed with AD in 2014. I say officially because the symptoms were there many years before. Memory loss, loss of words, forgetting details, birthdays, etc. The past two years I have had to remove all types of junk mail, advertising fliers, news paper…
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Sleep Medication
Mom fights sleep all the time. Staying up all night then not sleeping much during the day which spells a total disaster. When she doesn’t sleep, she’s horrible. Mean. Sometimes violent. Doesn’t know people. Delusions. I know everyone tells me melatonin but let’s face it. Does t work. Im looking for something of extended…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 2/25/22
FOCUS ON THE LORD * GOD THOUGHT: Psalm 27:7-8 NIV “Hear my voice when I call, Lord; be merciful to me and answer me. My heart says of you, ‘Seek his face!’ Your face, Lord, I will seek.” * VICTORY THOUGHT: I seek the Lord who is kind and forgiving; He hears my prayers. * POWER PRAYER: Kind and compassionate Heavenly…
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Tips for diaper changing
For a while my FIL has been ornery when I’m changing his diaper at night and cussing, no big deal, but lately he has been grabbing our hands, kicking, or grabbing the diaper. Even if we talk to him cheerfully and empathize with him and tell him it will be over soon, he’s not able to calm down. With 2 people we can handle…
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Great video about someone with lbd
I get Teepa snow emails and the latest email has part one of a video with someone with lewy body dementia. I watch it I was amazed. My neighbor had been diagnosed with lbd and I didn't think he was ever gonna get any better. To my surprise my neighbor has been doing do much better, I didn't understand lbd so this video was…
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Geriatric psychiatrist?
My mom has had the same GP for years and told he told my sister we shouldn't have to go to any specialist and that he can handle her Alzheimers care. She was diagnosed by a neurologist. My mom is mid stage 6 and has lived with me for almost 5 months and she is declining. More delusions like my sister's sons are really hers…
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Caregiver aid , app from Stanford Med
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Emergency help for patient
I have been trying to get my father into nursing care which has been a struggle. He has been showing aggression towards my mother (caregiver) who does not handle him in the correct ways. He does well at the day center. I really need an option to get him out of the home until I can get him into a nursing facility. The…
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I rest my case
Long story short. Took mother to her podiatry appointment with a new podiatrist. I told them beforehand she suffers from dementia. As she was seated in his exam chair he began asking her questions. I had previously told him she cannot appropriately answer questions. He essentially told me to " let her answer the questions"…