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Mom in Denial of Memory, Physical Mobility and Aging Issues
My 84 year old mother who is in AL MC due to VD is driving me insane. Not only is she in denial of her memory issues, she doesn't recognize that her morbid obesity and lack of exercise of many years has contributed to her mobility issues, odd walking gait, deformed (very narrow) feet, and leg discomfort. She has also been…
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Found AL mom says she doesn't want to live now
It's been awhile helping my mom and I finally found an AL place for her. I thought she wanted to move to this place, I told her about it, she was going on and on about when could she move. Today she was all upset and crying on the phone and almost hysterical and then said she didn't want to live anymore and wanted her life…
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Self Guilt
My 89 year old mother was first diagnosed with mild dementia in August of 2019. She was living on her own and driving to a market 1/2 mile away. I had been taking her to her doctor appointments for about a year. We noticed some forgetfuness, but brushed it off to her age. I moved in with her at the start of the pandemic…
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Wanting to go back to bed.
My DH was diagnosed in February. We had all seen changes for more than a year, and now it retrospect I should have recognized issues years ago. I find that he will fixate on an issue and just keep at it even when trying to redirect. Before we even pull out of the driveway he wants to take his seat belt off, this will go on…
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Recall Notice: Phillips' Sleep Products
This isn't strictly dementia-related, but members have mentioned using C-pap devices in various threads. Phillips Healthcare has recently recalled a number of the C-Pap and Bi-Pap machines (not just Dreamstations) because of a risk from the noise insulation material. This recall doesn't seem to have been covered broadly in…
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Expressing gratitude to care workers
My mom's going to be in her quasi-AL residence for a year now and it's been a very good experience. All the staff has been wonderful. They've calmed her meltdowns, gone with her to her room a half-dozen times a day to help her find her purse, encouraged her to join activities and have meals with other residents, and…
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Advice for new primary caregivers?
I need some advice - we will be taking MIL to Sib #1's house later this week. They have agreed to take over as primary caregivers for the next year to both give DH and I a break and to also allow us to spend the time we need with our daughter (pregnant and living with us) to assist her with the baby. I have told DH that I…
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Moved Mom from Memory Care to Assisted Living
Hello! My mom has been diagnosed ALZ for 12 years and been in Memory Care for 5. She was just released from Hospice after 2 years. Her MC unit moved 3 residents that required a 2 person lift with Hoyer to Assisted Living. It is a nightmare. I found another MC unit and are hoping Hospice will reevaluate. We hope the move is…
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Expectations for Geriatric Psych Unit and Process
It has been decided that my mom needs a stay at a GeriPsych unit to try to get some control over her aggressive behaviors in memory care. She's been hitting and kicking staff and the behaviors are escalating in frequency, intensity and longevity. Mon agreed to this when she was back on baseline. She's currently in the…
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vasapvagal syncope and alzheimer's
My wife (77) has had three episodes of vasogal syncope beginning Dec 15 2020 and the most recent was this morning. Fortunately in all three cases I was standing nearby when she started to lose consciousness while standing. As with this morning I was able to support her and ease her to the floor so that she was not hurt. I…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 7/2/21
GOD HEARS ME * Psalm 5:2-3 New King James Version * "Give heed to the voice of my cry, My King and my God, For to You I will pray. 3 My voice You shall hear in the morning, O Lord; In the morning I will direct it to You, And I will look up." * me: It is a comfort to know that God's Will is always in our best interest.…
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The disease or manipulation?
My mother has vascular dementia and Alzheimer’s, as well as heart failure. Her PCP has told me she has between 6-9 months to live because of her heart. I understand that the heart failure will only make the VD worse over time and it does seem to have accelerated her memory issues. She lives in a MIL apartment added onto…
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Funny: Percy Sledge and Bang- Zoom..!
Got Ma's phone set up and I tipped her daytime CNA to set her IPAD up to stream Weds Bible Study and Sunday church. Mom is a former Pastor, and can still quote a scripture or three, and rip off a prayer like nobody's business. When the phone was installed, I called to see if all was well. She can get calls in, but can only…
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MIL tripped on our stairs - and water bats
DH and I had the flooring replaced on our stairs and bedroom level last fall. We replaced the carpet in the bedrooms but had hardwoods put down in the upstairs hall and on the stairs. We've been worried that MIL (who always wears socks) would fall down the stairs. We purchased her some no-slip socks and explained that she…
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Moved my parents today, hoping it works
I managed to convince my dad to sign the paperwork for a "retirement community" that goes from Independent Living through 4 stages of Assisted Living. It's new, it's lovely, it's 3 minutes from my house, and there will be someone there round the clock if something bad happens. Meals, laundry, housekeeping and activities…
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Caregiving Has Aged Me
I'm not a vain person but looking at pictures of myself from just a few years ago, I can see that I have aged more than I thought I would have at this point in my life. Physically I feel older too. Self care is so important, take care of yourselves out there!
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Moving on
Hello, we just recently found out that my mom has EO Alzheimer's. I've been taking care of her for 3 years. My sisters and I want to move her down closer to my sisters so that I would have more help taking care of her. Mom says no! She and my dad have been in the same house for over 30 years.
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Phone Calls Driving me Crazy
My DW of 52 years has AD and is in an AL MC facility. I put an adaptive phone in her room. All of the large buttons have my picture on them and are programmed to call me with one touch. I thought this was a good idea that would allow her to stay in touch but there has been a downside - multiple repetitive calls. She will…
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Finally got BIL in MC -- feeling guilty, exhausted, but relieved
I spent July 1 in airports and on planes all day bringing my BIL, who has EO here to our state. Then yesterday I spent all day shopping and installing things to finish furnishing his room at the facility. This morning I got there early, finished filling out a mountain of paperwork, and set up his television with a few…
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How do you get a dementia patient to cooperate with an MRI?
My mother needs to have an MRCP (an MRI on the gallbladder and the liver). Unfortunately, because of my mother's vascular dementia, she could not sit still for an extended period of time, and she could not obey the commands of the technicians. She kept bending her knees and putting her arms onto her chest. So, the MRI had…
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Alcoholic Father Spiralling Down
Hello all, My mother is 87 with mild vascular dementia and a weak heart. She has been in assisted living for two months now. She is doing well with good care. My father is 88, has early dementia, and is an alcoholic. He resists all offers of help and remains at home. Neighbors and a family friend check on him since a…
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Long Distance
I live states away from my parents; I feel helpless sometimes when my Mom expresses stress regarding my DF. I want to help, but aside from phone calls cannot do much without visiting.I visit a few times a year, staying a few weeks-up-to-a-month at a time. I wish, for multiple reasons, we lived closer; however, due to my…
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Just my mom and me.
I'm 45, female, and I have been talking care of my mom, 78, has dementia. I see everyone has things like stage this or that. I have no idea what stage she is. I had to put her in a foster care place while I was searching for a place to live. Long story but I will sum it up. I moved back to Michigan from California when my…
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How do you deal with paranoia?
My mom was diagnosed in Feb with Alzheimer's. She was put on meds back in April but she is extremely paranoid, accusing my dad and myself of stealing from her, sneaking around to put her in a home etc etc how to deal with this? My dad is quiet a bit older than my mom and it is taken a toll on him and I am not sure how I…
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Financial services
Everything I have been looking at while googling has been useless. I need to talk to someone about financial services, help with social security, I mean I don't know the first thing about any of this. My mom has nothing. I'm not even being dramatic. She was receiving around 750 in social security. While in the foster home,…
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Pain - Real or Manifestation of AD
My DW has AD is living in an AL MC facility and complains daily about oral pain, sticky teeth and something stuck between her teeth. She has been to her regular dentist several times, a periodontist, an oral surgeon and a hospital dental clinic. All have been unable to identify a source of her pain and other perceived…
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Emotionally drained(1)
Back in May I posted that my DH was beginning the end of the journey. When he came home from the hospital he was put under home hospice and we were told we were probably looking at weeks not months. It has been over two months. He seemed to "rally back" to some extent. He can no longer walk or stand. We are trying to get a…
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Feelings of Fear for Self?
Hello, I'm a grandson of my grandmother who has rapidly progressive dementia. I'm struggling with some feelings of guilt, especially since I just found out she has been transferred over to hospice care. My grandfather, her husband, died of Parkinson's disease. While not a memory disorder, I can't help but worry "What if…
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Long Term care insurance- How complicated?
Hello I am brand new to this forum and am seeking advice. My mom has Alzheimer’s but is still functioning enough to live alone. However she is easily confused and would be lost in any unfamiliar surroundings. Like everyone she has good days and bad days. Been told it’s not going to get better…. Luckily she has long term…
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Introducing CGM/Recommended Fiblet
So, with help and guidance from the board, my family has made a LOT of progress towards getting a plan in place for my mom, and de-escalating a lot of hot button areas. Which is improving everyone's quality of life. I am so, so grateful for this. We had a neurologist appointment today, and Mom aced the MMSE, which was not…